kkktookmybabyaway

PK: Bob's sweep of Harley would have eliminated New England. Because Baltimore, KC and Buffalo didn't play each other, the next tie-breaker is conference record. You would have won based on a 7-5 conference record to KC's and Buffalo's 6-6 records. Quinn: There's generally a lot of parity, especially with the 7-9/8-8 records. One year (I think it was Season II) was more crazy than this. PLAYOFFS: I want to double-check final standings, but here is how Wild Card Weekend looks: AFC: #1 Seed: Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus) 10-5-1 #2 Seed: Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris) 10-6 #6 Baltimore Ravens (King PK) 8-7-1 @ #3 Houston Texans (Bored) 10-6 #5 Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off) 9-7 @ #4 New York Jets (Gert) 9-7 Chris gets the bye over Bored due to a better Conference record. NFC: #1 Atlanta Falcons (Rocket) 13-3 #2 Philadelphia Eagles (Starvenger) 12-4 #6 San Francisco 49ers (Devo) 9-7 @ #3 Minnesota Vikings (Danville Wrestling) 11-5 #5 Washington Redskins (Human Fly) 9-7 @ #4 Seattle Seahawks (UZI) 9-7 UZI is the division winner over Devo due to a better division record. Human Fly has the higher seed over Devo due to a head-to-head victory.

Wait until I tell you what your record is in games decided by 1 pick or less...

With the exception of the 9-7 wild card contention teams in the NFC, identical records do not have the tie-breaker rules applied to them just yet. AFC =*Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus) 10-5-1 =*Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris) 10-6 =*Houston Texans (Bored) 10-6 =*New York Jets (Gert) 9-7 Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off) 9-7 Baltimore Ravens (King PK) 8-7-1 ____________________________________ <--- glass ceiling Buffalo Bills (Bob Barron) 8-8 New England Patriots (Harley Quinn) 8-8 Kansas City Chiefs (BX) 8-8 Cleveland Browns (SFA Jack) 7-8-1 San Diego Chargers (909) 7-9 Cincinnati Bengals (Teke) 6-9-1 Miami Dolphins (Spaceman Spiff) 6-10 Indianapolis Colts (Alfdogg) 6-10 Oakland Raiders (Smues) 5-11 Tennessee Titans (Cuban Linx) 3-11-2 NFC =*Atlanta Falcons (Rocket) 13-3 =*Philadelphia Eagles (Starvenger) 12-4 =*Minnesota Vikings (Danville Wrestling) 11-5 =*Seattle Seahawks (UZI) 9-7 Washington Redskins (Human Fly) 9-7 San Francisco 49ers (Devo) 9-7 ____________________________________ <--- glass ceiling Carolina Panthers (Fazzle) 9-7 Dallas Cowboys (Hawk) 9-7 Detroit Lions (Chazz) 8-8 New York Giants (Cartman) 7-9 Green Bay Packers (VX) 7-9 Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Agent Bond) 7-9 New Orleans Saints (Brooklyn Zoo) 6-10 Arizona Cardinals (Vern Gagne) 6-10 St. Louis Rams (Canadian Guitarist) 6-10 Chicago Bears (Agent of Oblivion) 5-11

Deadline has come and gone. Bob Barron is using EPs.

If Mrs. kkk would surprise me on December 25 with one of your yuppie cars parked on our driveway with a red bow on top of the roof, I'd still rank my Atari 2600 way higher on my list of favorite holiday gifts than your overpriced junk. I can't remember when I got my first Big Wheel, but I'd put that above getting one of your cars. 11 p.m. • So my local liberal rag ran an editorial earlier this month that I just stumbled across. There's a local RIGHT-WING RADIO station that is doing a re-shuffling of its lineup. Oh Noes, the left-wing editorial board doesn't approve. I find it hilarious that the Shittsburgh Post-Gazette would comment about one-sidedness when their editorials are nothing more than a stream of never-ending hippie crap, but whatever. Basically, KDKA dumped a few hosts, brought back a long-time host and kept the station's best talker. Take it from me: Mike Pintek, Fred Honsberger and Marty Griffin is NOT an "overwhelmingly conservative" slant. Marty's a tool; I heard he's liberal but that's not why I don't listen to him -- he's an "investigative reporter" for a local television station and annoying as hell with his EVERYTHING is an OUTRAGE blather. I would put money on Pintek voting more Republican than Democrat, but he did say that, much to his regret, he voted for Fast Eddie in the 2002 governor's election. Fred has been a mainstay at KDKA for years and is a great talk-show guy. Here's the bottom line, and the Post-Gazette even admits this: That's why KDKA brought back Pintek, and that's why Honsberger still has a job at KDKA. It's business, you dipshits. What in the hell has that got to do with talk-radio programming? If we're going to go by this logic, how come the Shittsburgh Post-Gazette, along with the legions of other liberal media outlets, suddenly didn't turn conservative from 1994 through 2006 to "reflect the national political mood"? Having read the Post-Gazette from 1994-2000 and then again from 2003-2008 I can say matter-of-factly that its left-wing drivel remained the same, if not cranked up a few notches here and there. If there's one industry I want to turn to so I can learn how to make my business successful, it's the newspaper biz. Yessire. Nothing but black on those bottom lines. 9:30 a.m. • For God's sake, ESPN, can we please stop making references to the TOUGH TIMES WE LIVE IN? During yesterday's bowel games each contest had several references, and within a 5-minute span "Outside the Lines" and "Sports Reporters" also made comments. Good God. Can we move up President Hussein's Inauguration so we can all say we are living in a gilded age? 9:45 a.m. • Here's another one: "What recessionlol... blahblahblah... does Baseball need a salary cap?" Come on, Osama, make all this go away. LOL -- one of the pinheads on the panel just said now with these free agent signings the Yankees will be the top story of this upcoming baseball year. The Yankees are ALWAYS the top story each year, no matter what they do. And the one panelist said salary cap opponents are disillusioned? Oh, no, in the next segment they are going to talk about the year that was 2008. Let's see if we more President Hussein or RECESSION~! references. LOLx2 -- some panelist said Michael Phelps was celebrating when that one guy won the relay race for Team USA, Phelps was celebrating because now that guy made him "immortal" and got him all the post-Olympic deals. I'm sure Phelps was thinking, "YAY, now I get to host Saturday Night Live." Wow, no references. Color me impressed.

AFC EAST New England Patriots (Harley Quinn) 8-7 < PF: 125, PA: 108, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 3-1, DIV: 3-2 > New York Jets (Gert) 8-7 < PF: 110, PA: 104, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 3-1, DIV: 2-3 > Buffalo Bills (Bob Barron) 7-8 < PF: 110, PA: 108, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 3-2 > Miami Dolphins (Spaceman Spiff) 6-9 < PF: 119, PA: 127, AFC: 5-7, NFC: 1-2, DIV: 2-3 > AFC NORTH Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus) 10-4-1 < PF: 107, PA: 98, AFC: 7-3-1, NFC: 3-1, DIV: 3-1-1 > Baltimore Ravens (King PK) 8-6-1 < PF: 113, PA: 110, AFC: 6-4-1, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 3-3 > Cleveland Browns (SFA Jack) 6-8-1 < PF: 107, PA: 105, AFC: 6-4-1, NFC: 0-4, DIV: 3-2 > Cincinnati Bengals (Teke) 5-9-1 < PF: 106, PA: 113, AFC: 4-6-1, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 1-4-1 > AFC SOUTH Houston Texans (Bored) 9-6 < PF: 110, PA: 112, AFC: 7-5, NFC: 2-1, DIV: 5-1 > Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off) 8-7 < PF: 107, PA: 112, AFC: 6-5, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 2-4 > Indianapolis Colts (Alfdogg) 5-10 < PF: 99, PA: 110, AFC: 4-7, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 2-3 > Tennessee Titans (Cuban Linx) 3-10-2 < PF: 110, PA: 116, AFC: 2-7-2, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 2-3 > AFC WEST Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris) 10-5 < PF: 105, PA: 97, AFC: 8-3, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 4-1 > Kansas City Chiefs (BX) 8-7 < PF: 114, PA: 109, AFC: 6-5, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 4-2 > San Diego Chargers (909) 6-9 < PF: 97, PA: 105, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 1-4 > Oakland Raiders (Smues) 5-10 < PF: 107, PA: 117, AFC: 5-7, NFC: 0-3, DIV: 2-4 > NFC EAST Philadelphia Eagles (Starvenger) 12-3 < PF: 116, PA: 99, AFC: 4-0, NFC: 8-3, DIV: 3-2 > Washington Redskins (Human Fly) 8-7 < PF: 101, PA: 98, AFC: 1-3, NFC: 7-4, DIV: 3-3 > Dallas Cowboys (Hawk) 8-7 < PF: 105, PA: 110, AFC: 3-1, NFC: 5-6, DIV: 1-4 > New York Giants (Cartman) 7-8 < PF: 109, PA: 114, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 5-6, DIV: 4-2 > NFC NORTH Minnesota Vikings (Danville Wrestling) 10-5< PF: 116, PA: 104, AFC: 4-0, NFC: 6-5, DIV: 4-2 > Green Bay Packers (VX) 7-8 < PF: 110, PA: 115, AFC: 1-3, NFC: 6-5, DIV: 3-2 > Detroit Lions (Chazz) 7-8 < PF: 110, PA: 101, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 5-6, DIV: 3-2 > Chicago Bears (Agent of Oblivion) 5-10 < PF: 106, PA: 116, AFC: 2-1, NFC: 3-9, DIV: 1-5 > NFC SOUTH Atlanta Falcons (Rocket) 12-3 < PF: 128, PA: 96, AFC: 4-0, NFC: 8-3, DIV: 5-1 > Carolina Panthers (Fazzle) 8-7 < PF: 106, PA: 118, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 6-5, DIV: 3-2 > Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Agent Bond) 6-9 < PF: 101, PA: 106, AFC: 1-2, NFC: 5-7, DIV: 2-4 > New Orleans Saints (Brooklyn Zoo) 6-9 < PF: 100, PA: 113, AFC: 3-1, NFC: 3-8, DIV: 1-4 > NFC WEST San Francisco 49ers (Devo) 9-6 < PF: 107, PA: 102, AFC: 1-3, NFC: 8-3, DIV: 3-3 > Seattle Seahawks (UZI) 8-7 < PF: 113, PA: 107, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 6-5, DIV: 4-1 > St. Louis Rams (Canadian Guitarist) 6-9 < PF: 98, PA: 106, AFC: 1-3, NFC: 5-6, DIV: 3-3 > Arizona Cardinals (Vern Gagne) 6-9 < PF: 112, PA: 122, AFC: 3-1, NFC: 3-8, DIV: 1-4 >

There might be a discount for selected games through Comcast. I could try and hook you up if you want. You know where I post. And the only exception to my anti-PNC Park rule is if out-of-town guests arrive. Maybe the Cubs' Zambrano will hit for the cycle this year.

It's only 8 years until the Cowboys visit Shittsburgh again -- look me up when you arrive.

All games are on Sunday. Yay. St. Louis at Atlanta (13.5) -----> 27-31 Jacksonville at Baltimore (12.5) -----> 7-27 (6.5) New England at Buffalo -----> 13-0 Kansas City at Cincinnati (3.5) -----> 6-16 Detroit at Green Bay (9.5) -----> 21-31 Chicago at Houston (2.5) -----> 24-31 (3.5) Tennessee at Indianapolis -----> 0-23 N.Y. Giants at Minnesota (6.5) -----> 19-20 (3.5) Carolina at New Orleans -----> 33-31 Miami at N.Y. Jets (2.5) -----> 24-17 Dallas at Philadelphia (1.5) -----> 6-44 Cleveland at Pittsburgh (10.5) -----> 0-31 Oakland at Tampa (12.5) -----> 31-24 Seattle at Arizona (6.5) -----> 21-34 Denver at San Diego (7.5) -----> 21-52 Washington at San Francisco (3.5) -----> 24-27 Tentative results not including the Sunday Night Game. St. Louis Rams (Canadian Guitarist 6-10) d by Atlanta Falcons (USC 13-3) 7-7 STL: ATL/BAL/NE/KC/GB/CHI/IND/MIN/NO/NYJ/DAL/PIT/TB/AZ/DEN/SF/10(-27=17) ATL: ATL/JAX/BUF/KC/GB/CHI/IND/NYG/CAR/MIA/DAL/PIT/OAK/SEA/DEN/WAS/33(-31=2) DIFF: BAL/JAX, NE/BUF, MIN/NYG, NO/CAR, NYJ/MIA, TB/OAK, AZ/SEA, SF/WAS, 10/33 Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off 9-7) d Baltimore Ravens (KingPK 8-7-1) 9-8 JAX: ATL/JAX/BUF/CIN/GB/HOU/IND/MIN/CAR/MIA/PHI/PIT/TB/AZ/DEN/WAS/13 BAL: ATL/BAL/NE/KC/DET/CHI/IND/NYG/CAR/MIA/DAL/PIT/OAK/SEA/SD/SF/28 DIFF: JAX/BAL, BUF/NE, CIN/KC, GB/DET, HOU/CHI, MIN/NYG, PHI/DAL, TB/OAK, AZ/SEA, DEN/SD, WAS/SF New England Patriots (Harley Quinn 8-8) d by Buffalo Bills (Bob Barron 8-8) 8-10 NE: ATL/BAL/NE/KC/GB/CHI/TEN/MIN/CAR/NYJ/PHI/PIT/TB/AZ/SD/WAS/35 BUF: ATL/BAL/BUF/CIN/GB/HOU/IND/MIN/NO/NYJ/PHI/PIT/TB/AZ/SD/SF/EP DIFF: NE/BUF, KC/CIN, CHI/HOU, TEN/IND, CAR/NO, WAS/SF, 35/XX Kansas City Chiefs (BX 8-8) d by Cincinnati Bengals (Teke 6-9-1) 6-9 KC: ATL/JAX/NE/KC/GB/CHI/TEN/NYG/CAR/MIA/DAL/CLE/TB/AZ/DEN/WAS/21 CIN: ATL/BAL/NE/CIN/GB/HOU/TEN/MIN/NO/NYJ/DAL/PIT/TB/AZ/SD/SF/21 DIFF: JAX/BAL, KC/CIN, CHI/HOU, NYG/MIN, CAR/NO, MIA/NYJ, CLE/PIT, DEN/SD, WAS/SF Detroit Lions (Chazz 8-8) d Green Bay Packers (VX 7-9) 9-6 DET: ATL/JAX/NE/KC/DET/HOU/IND/NYG/NO/MIA/DAL/PIT/OAK/SEA/DEN/WAS/14 GB: ATL/BAL/NE/KC/DET/CHI/TEN/NYG/CAR/MIA/PHI/PIT/TB/SEA/DEN/SF/20 DIFF: JAX/BAL, HOU/CHI, IND/TEN, NO/CAR, DAL/PHI, OAK/TB, WAS/SF Chicago Bears (Agent of Oblivion 5-11) d by Houston Texans (Bored 10-6) 8-10 CHI: ATL/JAX/BUF/CIN/DET/CHI/IND/NYG/NO/MIA/PHI/PIT/TB/AZ/DEN/SF/36 HOU: ATL/BAL/NE/KC/GB/CHI/TEN/NYG/NO/MIA/PHI/PIT/TB/SEA/SD/WAS/21 DIFF: JAX/BAL, BUF/NE, CIN/KC, DET/GB, IND/TEN, AZ/SEA, DEN/SD, SF/WAS, 36/21 Tennessee Titans (Cletus 3-11-2) d by Indianapolis Colts (Alfdogg 6-10) 9-9 TEN: ATL/BAL/NE/KC/DET/HOU/TEN/MIN/CAR/MIA/PHI/PIT/OAK/AZ/SD/SF/17(-0=17) IND: ATL/JAX/NE/CIN/DET/CHI/TEN/NYG/NO/MIA/PHI/PIT/OAK/SEA/SD/SF/13(-23=10) DIFF: BAL/JAX, KC/CIN, HOU/CHI, MIN/NYG, CAR/NO, AZ/SEA, 17/13 N.Y. Giants (Cartman 7-9) d by Minnesota Vikings (Danville 11-5) 8-7 NYG: ATL/BAL/NE/KC/DET/HOU/IND/MIN/NO/MIA/DAL/CLE/TB/SEA/SD/SF/20 MIN: ATL/JAX/NE/CIN/GB/CHI/TEN/MIN/CAR/MIA/DAL/PIT/TB/AZ/SD/WAS/22 DIFF: BAL/JAX, KC/CIN, DET/GB, HOU/CHI, IND/TEN, NO/CAR, CLE/PIT, SEA/AZ, SF/WAS Carolina Panthers (Fazzle 9-7) d New Orleans Saints (Brooklyn Zoo 6-10) 5-5 CAR: ATL/JAX/NE/KC/DET/CHI/TEN/NYG/CAR/MIA/DAL/PIT/TB/AZ/DEN/SF/29(-33=3) NO: ATL/JAX/BUF/KC/DET/CHI/IND/NYG/CAR/NYJ/PHI/CLE/TB/SEA/SD/WAS/21(-31=10) DIFF: NE/BUF, TEN/IND, MIA/NYJ, DAL/PHI, PIT/CLE, AZ/SEA, DEN/SD, SF/WAS, 29/21 Miami Dolphins (Spaceman Spiff 6-10) d by N.Y. Jets (Gert 9-7) 7-8 MIA: ATL/JAX/NE/KC/GB/CHI/IND/NYG/CAR/NYJ/DAL/PIT/TB/AZ/SD/SF/24 NYJ: ATL/BAL/NE/CIN/DET/CHI/IND/MIN/CAR/MIA/PHI/PIT/TB/AZ/DEN/SF/17 DIFF: JAX/BAL, KC/CIN, GB/DET, NYG/MIN, NYJ/MIA, DAL/PHI, SD/DEN Dallas Cowboys (Hawk 9-7) d Philadelphia Eagles (Starvenger 12-4) 11-11 DAL: ATL/JAX/NE/CIN/DET/HOU/IND/NYG/CAR/MIA/PHI/PIT/OAK/AZ/SD/SF/21(-6=15) PHI: STL/JAX/NE/KC/GB/HOU/IND/NYG/NO/MIA/DAL/CLE/OAK/AZ/DEN/WAS/17(-44=27) DIFF: ATL/STL, CIN/KC, DET/GB, CAR/NO, PHI/DAL, PIT/CLE, SD/DEN, SF/WAS, 21/17 Cleveland Browns (SFA Jack 7-8-1) d Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus 10-5-1) 10-8 CLE: ATL/BAL/NE/CIN/GB/HOU/IND/MIN/NO/NYJ/DAL/PIT/TB/AZ/SD/SF/10 PIT: ATL/BAL/NE/KC/GB/HOU/TEN/NYG/NO/NYJ/PHI/CLE/TB/AZ/DEN/SF/16 DIFF: CIN/KC, IND/TEN, MIN/NYG, DAL/PHI, PIT/CLE, SD/DEN, 10/16 Oakland Raiders (Smues 5-11) d by Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Agent Bond 7-9) 8-8 OAK: STL/BAL/BUF/CIN/DET/HOU/IND/MIN/NO/NYJ/DAL/CLE/TB/SEA/SD/WAS/17(-31=14) TB: ATL/JAX/NE/KC/GB/CHI/TEN/NYG/CAR/MIA/PHI/PIT/OAK/AZ/DEN/SF/35(-24=11) DIFF: STL/ATL, BAL/JAX, BUF/NE, CIN/KC, DET/GB, HOU/CHI, IND/TEN, MIN/NYG, NO/CAR, NYJ/MIA, DAL/PHI, CLE/PIT, TB/OAK, SEA/ARZ, SD/DEN, WAS/SF, 17/35 Seattle Seahawks (UZI 9-7) d Arizona Cardinals (Vern Gagne 6-10) 7-6 SEA: ATL/JAX/NE/KC/GB/HOU/IND/MIN/CAR/NYJ/DAL/PIT/TB/AZ/DEN/WAS/21 AZ: ATL/JAX/NE/CIN/DET/HOU/TEN/NYG/NO/NYJ/DAL/PIT/TB/SEA/DEN/SF/22 DIFF: KC/CIN, GB/DET, IND/TEN, MIN/NYG, CAR/NO, AZ/SEA, WAS/SF Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris 10-6) d by San Diego Chargers (909 7-9) 7-8 DEN: ATL/BAL/NE/CIN/DET/CHI/TEN/MIN/CAR/NYJ/PHI/PIT/TB/AZ/DEN/WAS/24 SD: ATL/JAX/NE/CIN/GB/CHI/IND/MIN/CAR/MIA/DAL/PIT/TB/AZ/SD/SF/30 DIFF: BAL/JAX, DET/GB, TEN/IND, NYJ/MIA, PHI/DAL, DEN/SD, WAS/SF Washington Redskins (Human Fly 9-7) d San Francisco 49ers (Devo 9-7) 9-7 WAS: ATL/JAX/NE/CIN/GB/HOU/TEN/NYG/NO/MIA/DAL/PIT/TB/SEA/SD/SF/17 SF: ATL/JAX/BUF/KC/GB/CHI/IND/NYG/NO/NYJ/DAL/PIT/TB/AZ/DEN/WAS/17 DIFF: NE/BUF, CIN/KC, HOU/CHI, TEN/IND, MIA/NYJ, SEA/AZ, SD/DEN, SF/WAS, 17/17 The 7-8 teams are pretty much out of it, but one never knows. Division leaders have the asterisk. Teams that already clinched have an equal sign. AFC =*Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus) 10-4-1 =*Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris) 10-5 =*Houston Texans (Bored) 9-6 *New England Patriots (Harley Quinn) 8-7 Baltimore Ravens (King PK) 8-6-1 Kansas City Chiefs (BX) 8-7 New York Jets (Gert) 8-7 Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off) 8-7 Buffalo Bills (Bob Barron) 7-8 ____________________________________ <--- glass ceiling Cleveland Browns (SFA Jack) 6-8-1 San Diego Chargers (909) 6-9 Miami Dolphins (Spaceman Spiff) 6-9 Cincinnati Bengals (Teke) 5-9-1 Indianapolis Colts (Alfdogg) 5-10 Oakland Raiders (Smues) 5-10 Tennessee Titans (Cuban Linx) 3-10-2 NFC =*Philadelphia Eagles (Starvenger) 12-3 =*Atlanta Falcons (Rocket) 12-3 =*Minnesota Vikings (Danville Wrestling) 10-5 *San Francisco 49ers (Devo) 9-6 Seattle Seahawks (UZI) 8-7 Washington Redskins (Human Fly) 8-7 Carolina Panthers (Fazzle) 8-7 Dallas Cowboys (Hawk) 8-7 New York Giants (Cartman) 7-8 Green Bay Packers (VX) 7-8 Detroit Lions (Chazz) 7-8 ____________________________________ <--- glass ceiling New Orleans Saints (Brooklyn Zoo) 6-9 Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Agent Bond) 6-9 Arizona Cardinals (Vern Gagne) 6-9 St. Louis Rams (Canadian Guitarist) 6-9 Chicago Bears (Agent of Oblivion) 5-10 Some Notes Regarding Playoff Races. AFC EAST: -- Harley, Buffalo beat you one already so the Bills will clinch the division over you. However, you did sweep the Jets this season. You also beat KC. Problem is your 5-7 conference record doesn’t look promising, especially since Jacksonville’s conference record is better than yours. -- Gert, you split the season series with Buffalo. If you lose and Buffalo wins you lose on division record. New England swept you and you already lost to KC. Jacksonville has a better conference record than you. Ideally, you need to win and for Buffalo to beat New England; otherwise, you will need some help to get in the playoffs. -- Bob, a win and a Jets loss gets you the division. AFC NORTH: -- KingPK, win and you’re in. Lose and you’ll need KC and the Jets to lose. AFC SOUTH: -- Always Pissed Off, Houston swept you so the division is clinched. You beat Buffalo, and if you beat Baltimore, it looks like you’ll be in the playoffs because your conference record will be better than the Jets'. It looks like you and KC will have to go to another level of tie-breakers. I’ll wait to cross that bridge if needed. AFC WEST: -- BX, You beat the Jets. You look like a “win and you’re in” case. NFC EAST: -- Human, you and Dallas split the season series. However, you have the better divisional record. You beat Seattle and have a better conference record than Carolina. -- Hawk, Human Fly has you beat on divisional record. You lost to Seattle and San Francisco – The 49ers taking the division will help with what little playoff chance you have. You need Fazzle to lose. You know what, just cheer for San Francisco to beat Washington, Seattle to lose and Carolina to lose. NFC NORTH: NFC SOUTH: -- Fazzle, you didn’t play any of the 8-7 NFC teams this year. San Francisco and Washington have better conference records. Seattle has the same conference record as you. Dallas has a worse conference record. Cheer for San Francisco to win. If the 49ers clinch the division, Washington will lose. That looks like it would put you in the postseason. NFC WEST: -- Devo, if you lose and Seattle wins, you lose the division based on Seattle with the better divisional record (you two split the season series). If you lose, Human Fly beats you out for a wild card spot. You would still have a better conference record than Carolina and Dallas. Still not putting the equal sign by you, though. -- UZI, You lost to Washington in Week 12. You beat Dallas in Week 13. As of right now, you and Carolina have identical conference records. Now here's my usual copy-and-paste regular-season tie-breaker process.

Oh this is going to be fun

You deserve to get into the playoffs after what you did at 0:12. And LOL at the player that threw a snowball at 0:07. Also, one of the million reasons Alan Faneca is the man -- peep 0:37. 7:30 p.m. • Remember when high gas prices were supposed to be BAD? This was from my local liberal fishwrap last week. STOP THE PRESSES~!!!! You mean to tell me that when you tax an evil money-making company, that evil money-making company passes on the cost to the CONSUMERS? But ... but .... we're supposed to punish the evil money-making companies! So I guess now when President Hussein raises gasoline taxes, it will be applauded by Medium-Large Media because it's going to fund welfare road construction. Actually, I'm not guessing on this one. Jesus tap-dancing Christ, when are we NOT in a crisis? Everybody get in their bunkers. • We could possibly have four NFL teams with double-digit win totals miss the playoffs but have two teams at 8-8 win their respective divisions. Awesome. • Is anyone really surprised? Hell, I'm starting to think giving out welfare to individuals might be the better bet. At least they don't pretend to be leeches. • So I just had a Scott Keith's Biggest Fan moment. In my own house. The better half and I got a camcorder on Black Friday. She’s playing around with the thing and trying to burn her recently film creations to DVDs. I have no motivation to figure it out. Well, here’s a conversation we just had. Figure out who’s who. “I can’t get this video to appear on the computer. What do I do?” “I dunno.” “I want to burn this to a disk. I’m putting in a blank disk and nothing is happening.” “Are you using a DVD disk?” “No.” “You need a DVD disk to burn DVDs.” “You do?” It was at this moment that infamous TSM thread popped into my head. I’m dead serious.

Que?

Here are the updated "rankings" not counting the Sunday/Monday night games. Teams that have undecided matchups as of this time have a "=" next to them. I haven't started looking up regular season tie-breakers yet. One thing I will say is that the Jets were swept by New England. AFC *Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus) 10-4-1 *Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris) 10-5 *Houston Texans (Bored) 9-6 *New England Patriots (Harley Quinn) 8-7 Baltimore Ravens (King PK) 8-6-1 Kansas City Chiefs (BX) 8-7 New York Jets (Gert) 8-7 Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off) 8-7 Buffalo Bills (Bob Barron) 7-8 ____________________________________ <--- glass ceiling Cleveland Browns (SFA Jack) 6-8-1 San Diego Chargers (909) 6-9 Miami Dolphins (Spaceman Spiff) 6-9 Cincinnati Bengals (Teke) 5-9-1 Indianapolis Colts (Alfdogg) 5-10 Oakland Raiders (Smues) 5-10 Tennessee Titans (Cuban Linx) 3-10-2 NFC *Philadelphia Eagles (Starvenger) 12-3 *Atlanta Falcons (Rocket) 12-3 *Minnesota Vikings (Danville Wrestling) 10-5 *San Francisco 49ers (Devo) 9-6 Seattle Seahawks (UZI) 8-7 Washington Redskins (Human Fly) 8-7 Carolina Panthers (Fazzle) 8-7 Dallas Cowboys (Hawk) 8-7 New York Giants (Cartman) 7-8 Green Bay Packers (VX) 7-8 Detroit Lions (Chazz) 7-8 ____________________________________ <--- glass ceiling New Orleans Saints (Brooklyn Zoo) 6-9 Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Agent Bond) 6-9 Arizona Cardinals (Vern Gagne) 6-9 St. Louis Rams (Canadian Guitarist) 6-9 Chicago Bears (Agent of Oblivion) 5-10

AFC EAST New England Patriots (Harley Quinn) 8-6 < PF: 116, PA: 97, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 3-0, DIV: 3-2 > Buffalo Bills (Bob Barron) 7-7 < PF: 102, PA: 104, AFC: 5-5, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 3-2 > New York Jets (Gert) 7-7 < PF: 101, PA: 97, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 2-1, DIV: 2-3 > Miami Dolphins (Spaceman Spiff) 5-9 < PF: 112, PA: 120, AFC: 4-6, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 2-3 > AFC NORTH Pittsburgh Steelers (Kahran Ramsus) 9-4-1 < PF: 99, PA: 93, AFC: 6-3-1, NFC: 3-1, DIV: 3-1-1 > Baltimore Ravens (King PK) 8-5-1 < PF: 106, PA: 102, AFC: 6-4-1, NFC: 2-1, DIV: 3-3 > Cleveland Browns (SFA Jack) 6-7-1 < PF: 102, PA: 100, AFC: 6-3-1, NFC: 0-4, DIV: 3-1 > Cincinnati Bengals (Teke) 4-9-1 < PF: 101, PA: 108, AFC: 3-6-1, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 0-4-1 > AFC SOUTH Houston Texans (Bored) 8-6 < PF: 101, PA: 102, AFC: 6-5, NFC: 2-1, DIV: 5-1 > Jacksonville Jaguars (Always Pissed Off) 7-7 < PF: 100, PA: 107, AFC: 5-5, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 1-4 > Indianapolis Colts (Alfdogg) 5-9 < PF: 94, PA: 103, AFC: 4-6, NFC: 1-9, DIV: 2-2 > Tennessee Titans (Cuban Linx) 3-9-2 < PF: 105, PA: 108, AFC: 2-6-2, NFC: 1-3, DIV: 2-3 > AFC WEST Denver Broncos (Canadian Chris) 9-5 < PF: 99, PA: 91, AFC: 7-3, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 4-1 > Kansas City Chiefs (BX) 8-6 < PF: 108, PA: 102, AFC: 6-4, NFC: 2-2, DIV: 4-2 > San Diego Chargers (909) 6-8 < PF: 91, PA: 99, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 1-2, DIV: 1-4 > Oakland Raiders (Smues) 5-9 < PF: 99, PA: 108, AFC: 5-6, NFC: 0-3, DIV: 2-4 > NFC EAST Philadelphia Eagles (Starvenger) 12-2 < PF: 109, PA: 91, AFC: 4-0, NFC: 8-2, DIV: 3-1 > New York Giants (Cartman) 7-7 < PF: 101, PA: 106, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 5-5, DIV: 4-2 > Washington Redskins (Human Fly) 7-7 < PF: 93, PA: 91, AFC: 1-3, NFC: 6-4, DIV: 2-3 > Dallas Cowboys (Hawk) 7-7 < PF: 97, PA: 103, AFC: 2-1, NFC: 5-6, DIV: 1-4 > NFC NORTH Minnesota Vikings (Danville Wrestling) 10-4< PF: 109, PA: 92, AFC: 4-0, NFC: 6-4, DIV: 4-2 > Green Bay Packers (VX) 7-7 < PF: 102, PA: 104, AFC: 1-3, NFC: 6-4, DIV: 3-1 > Detroit Lions (Chazz) 6-8 < PF: 102, PA: 96, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 4-6, DIV: 3-2 > Chicago Bears (Agent of Oblivion) 4-10 < PF: 95, PA: 108, AFC: 2-1, NFC: 2-9, DIV: 0-5 > NFC SOUTH Atlanta Falcons (Rocket) 11-3 < PF: 160, PA: 89, AFC: 4-0, NFC: 7-3, DIV: 5-1 > Carolina Panthers (Fazzle) 7-7 < PF: 98, PA: 110, AFC: 2-2, NFC: 5-5, DIV: 3-2 > New Orleans Saints (Brooklyn Zoo) 6-8 < PF: 95, PA: 102, AFC: 3-1, NFC: 3-7, DIV: 1-4 > Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Agent Bond) 5-9 < PF: 95, PA: 100, AFC: 0-2, NFC: 5-7, DIV: 2-4 > NFC WEST San Francisco 49ers (Devo) 9-5 < PF: 101, PA: 96, AFC: 1-3, NFC: 8-2, DIV: 3-2 > Seattle Seahawks (UZI) 8-6 < PF: 106, PA: 98, AFC: 2-1, NFC: 6-5, DIV: 4-1 > St. Louis Rams (Canadian Guitarist) 5-9 < PF: 92, PA: 100, AFC: 1-3, NFC: 4-6, DIV: 2-3 > Arizona Cardinals (Vern Gagne) 5-9 < PF: 101, PA: 113, AFC: 2-1, NFC: 3-8, DIV: 1-4 >

If someone wants to have a second set of picks in reserve in case of someone copying their publicly posted picks, that is well within the rules. And Bob's not the only one who has done this in the past. And Prop 1 has passed with 17 votes.

Deadline has come and gone. And Chris, if you were going to copy Bob's picks, Bob had a back-up plan in place.

Note: There's a chance I may be out Sunday morning. In case I'm not back to finalize picks on time, the deadline is kick-off. Any time that reads past 1 p.m. will not be accepted.

Deadline for the Ravens game has come and gone.

Actually, as far as lazy remixes go, this one isn't as bad when compared to others (there's one for Cube's "Today was a good day" that is just awful).

Deadline for the Thursday night game has come and gone.

Thanks for stealing my joke that was going to be used at just the right time. Oh well, you may have those fly rhymes already posted, but you ain't got deez skills. Now chiggety check yo' self befo you wriggety wreck yo' self. Aw hell no. Damn remixes... 5:11 onward is how it goes down in the hood.

So I recently got a Facebook account. Want to link up? PM me your name/e-mail. I have Carnival confirmed so I figure it can't get worse. 10 p.m. • So I saw the following headline on Drudge: HITWISE INTERNET NEWS RACE: YAHOO OVER CNN.COM... GOOGLE TOPS DRUDGE... MORE... Oh what the hell, let's give this a shot. I opened it up, and it was a PDF. I looked at the Top 10 News and Media Category Websites Ranked By US Market Share of Visits. Yahoo! News The Weather Channel - US CNN.com MSNBC Google News Drudge Report Yahoo! Weather OMG FAUXFox NewsLOL2008~! The New York Times People Magazine I then went to Top Search Terms for News and Media Category. From the PDF file description: "The following report lists the most popular search terms for the 1 week ending 12/13/2008, that resulted in traffic to websites classified by Hitwise within the 'News and Media' industry. For example, the most popular search term was 'cnn' representing 0.69% of all search terms that delivered users to websites classified by Hitwise within the 'News and Media' industry." Now I wonder why someone puts "CNN" in a search engine when "www.cnn.com" would make more sense, but whatever. Here is the list. Take a gander at what was #19. cnn weather OMG FAUXfox newsLOL2008~! drudge drudge report weather.com msnbc weather channel cnn.com news caylee anthony huffington post tv guide noaa people accuweather national weather service yahoo jennifer aniston new york times • Get used to this. Today a state computer. Tomorrow your home PC (after they take your guns away first, of course). If the speech gestapo ever stumble across this place I'm fucked. LOL "State officials were unaware..." Yeah, I'm sure some Alaska public servant is working 40 hours/week going through other people's e-mails. Then again, there probably is an entire department for this. I may stand corrected on this one.

No. ESPN don't like him no more.

Here are two rule change suggestions: 1) On weeks where there will be Thursday games (or other non-traditional days like Saturdays), I would put up the thread early with only picks for those games. The spread for these early games will go up early in the week, such as late Monday/Tuesday. The remaining spreads will be posted Wednesday/Thursday. That will require two separate instances for you to post picks, but it will give you more time to send in the early game pick. By holding off on calling spreads for the Sunday games later in the week, the spreads posted will be more accurate than if I post them Monday/Tuesday, which is the reason I have held off on doing this. ****************************************** 2) If you are on a losing team and have no chance at the playoffs, I had an idea as to "phone in" your picks. For example, if you are 0-12, let me know via PM you wish to "phone in" the rest of the season. This way, if someone is having a bad year, the team he represents will still be competitive for the rest of the year. I would not announce publicly who has "phoned in" his picks. I would also ask you come up with a different formula to "phone in" your picks so someone doesn't catch on that you were picking all home teams for two consecutive weeks. You would also need TB scores as well. I know many of you still send in picks when your team's record is sub.-500, but I don't want to lose long-time participants because of a bad year and their mind moves elsewhere. And remember, even though you may go against someone that didn't submit picks for a Thursday game and TB score, this advantage may also go to a person who you are competing with for that final playoff spot. ****************************************** When you submit your picks this week, please let me know if you vote "yay" or "nay" on these two proposals. Saying "I don't care" or "Do whatever" counts as a "nay," as does not voting at all. We must have a majority of teams (17) agree with each proposal in order to make each one pass.