BUTT

I don't think these ideas could ever come to fruition in a public venue. BUT I believe we've happened upon the perfect concept for the first TSM Films production.

"Confessions of a Vampire" is great, because it's a rewrite of "Objects in the Rear View Mirror" except instead of being about best friends dying and abusive drunk fathers and hooking up with some hot chick, it's about being a freakin' vampire and EATING NAPOLEON'S PAGEBOY. Also, "Tanz Der Vampires" is great if only for "Seize the Night," which Meat Loaf did much better on Bat III since it didn't have a ridiculous thumping dance beat. But the English version was awful from what I've heard of it. Someone posted audio from an early "Dance of the Vampires" performance on YouTube and during "Vampires in Love" when they start singing "Turn around......" the whole audience starts laughing, like "LOL THEY'RE SINGIN' TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE HEART!" It wasn't supposed to be funny! Jim just reuses songs a lot!

what

Too bad he's back in NIN now!

I won't argue with that.

CJ's one of those dudes who got banned AND STAYED BANNED for something that would barely get him a warning today. I don't see why this near-half-decade-old banning can't be undone.

Those terrorist groups will never suspect that the man in a throwback Knicks jersey watching The Best of Jenna Haze Anal Scenes Vol. 12 on his iPod Video isn't one of their own! Send in Special Operative Crucifixio Jones to infiltrate!

Banky was only banned once as far as I remember. The infamous 2003 ban that was rescinded after Dames made some shit up about Banky helping him after he deleted all the members or something. Also he was put in Whiny Bitches after he made fun of teke184 ON HIS BIRTHDAY but that only lasted a few hours or so and I think teke got demodded for that so it wasn't much of a banishment. Choken got banned three or four times by my recollection. Brody was banned more than that, but at least three of those were banned concurrently when it was discovered that Arnold Oldschool, Frank Nabbit and Duke the Dog were the same person. Now all three apparently have a free pass from ever being banned, Banky because he's a legend, Choken because he doesn't cause any trouble and Bruiser because he looks like Larry Flynt. Can't say the same for the Leen!

Oh and I like this idea, except it should be modified into a GAY LUMBERJACK MATCH.

I know the KKK stable idea has been done.

Damien, have you ever heard of J.R. Benson's Extremely (and/or Incredibly) Strange Wrestling promotion? That group had characters like "The Abortionist", "The Rapist", and "The Great NAMBLA". They also had a "Tub of AIDS-Infected Syringes" match. You aren't the first person to have such ideas. But I still like the way you think.

Also, as an 11-year-old, I thought Bulldog's promo at the end of "Good Friends, Better Enemies" was pretty great. Hendrix: Davey Boy Smith, you've got to be the happiest- Bulldog: STINKIN' ROTTEN PERVERT SHAWN MICHAELS! Monsoon: What? Bulldog: HE WANTS TO SLEEP WITH MY WIFE? Monsoon: WHAT? Bulldog: I CAN'T WAIT FOR MAY 26TH, I'M GONNA GET HIM RIGHT NOW! As a paranoid non sequitur, this was pretty hilarious since the angle was just starting and I had no idea what he was talking about. The whole feud should have been Bulldog making increasingly strange accusations against HBK, like when Fred Phelps said "The President of the United States gets his jollies masturbating horses." Tell me that wouldn't get over.

Gay stalker Goldust was the best thing about WWF in '96, until I realized that it was the same exact angle every month, just with a different homophobic face programmed against him. Him giving "mouth-to-mouth" to Ahmed Johnson was fucking hilarious.

I don't think enough's been said about how damaging Austin's heel turn was for business. I think the "IWC" tends to overlook it because 1) It's just expected from longtime fans that when a face is stale they will turn heel, 2) They expected an Austin heel turn to big business since the last time a star of that magnitude had turned (Hogan), it had done huge business, and 3) Austin was, in a lot of net fans' opinions, more entertaining as a heel. But I can only imagine how someone who started watching in 1998, who wasn't familiar with all the tricks of wrestling and didn't know that every wrestling character is booked as a schizophrenic who completely changes their demeanor on a moment's notice, would have felt when seeing Austin turn heel and join up with McMahon. It had to be the biggest "what the fuck" moment imaginable. And what makes it even dumber was that Austin was still super-hot as a face at the time. He wasn't stale in my opinion because that year-long absence had made him fresh again, and during the buildup to WM17, it was Rock who was booed during their feud. Not to mention the fact that they turned him heel in the absolute worst venue possible, a 70,000 seat stadium in his home state where the crowd was solidly behind him and his dastardly, nefarious stolen win got him one of the biggest pops I've ever heard. There was still a lot of steam left in an Austin/HHH feud, but instead that feud was pushed to the backburner and then due to circumstances beyond WWE's control, never ended up resuming. Even if WWE didn't see any top heels on the horizon beyond HHH for a face champion Austin, they still purchased WCW a week before Mania. There were a whole bunch of WCW guys they could have programmed against Austin like Booker, DDP, Flair (had they signed him during the Invasion) and so on. Anyway, everyone points to the poor booking of the Invasion as WWE's biggest failure during 2001 but I think it was the Austin heel turn.

I suspect if there ever is a reunion of the classic lineup, Sorum will be there instead of Adler. Too bad Sorum is a fucking monumental douchebag. You think Robin Finck is better than Slash?

Hey, up until last month the dude was running this site. Have some respect!

You've never explained why you won't just call it "Wii".

IT'S NOT "THE NINTENDO"

A few points here: 1) Marney didn't deserve to be banned. 2) Some may feel that Marney was making the CE folder worse. This is false. The CE folder is, was, and will always be awful. It could not get any worse. Marney does, however, make it more fun. 3) This is not that last time that she will be banned and unbanned. 4) Nobody takes message boards as seriously as Cancer Marney. Even ForumPro, and he cares a lot. For someone who has the president on speed-dial you'd think she'd realize how inconsequential these forum warz are.

Bump for newfound relevance.

I was theneocon. Oh that's brilliant.

I am proud to be one of four people ever banned at the Pit.

Nice outfit, Aliza. Clarissa Darling would be proud.

Why are you calling everyone "boy"? Are you a slave owner? The Undertaker? Ellen Foley in "Paradise by the Dashboard Light"? If Cancer Marney has such a problem with the Weighted Abortion Companion Cube, she should head on up to New Haven with a handful of cleverly-worded signs and protest in the grand tradition of Our Founding Fathers.