Adam

MELODY Alright, we've chased the haters away, it's Mel to the O to the Dy along with Jade Rodez and we're gonna commentate your brains out for this Sausage Fest Battle Royal! Oh yeah, we don't play. Jade, we've never met but let's pretend we have and are best friends. Who's your money on tonight? JADE Uhm...well, D*LUX I guess. I don't gamble though. MELODY Oh. Well, that makes this a lot less fun. I'll put my money away then I guess. JADE You're not betting on your brothers. MELODY Heh...good one. Would you bet on your brother if he were in this? JADE Yeah. MELODY Fair enough. Your brother's hot, so I guess I can understand why you wouldn't be mortally ashamed of him. Let's go to the ring where there's a whole bunch of sausage inside! BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, this is your Show Before The Show, 20 Man Over The Top Rope Battle Royal! Introducing the participants. First, accompanied by their Business Consultant Mackenzie DeCenzo... BIFF "SHAMPOO" ATLAS and FLEX PHILLIPS... NUTRITION'S REAL GURUS... N... R... G!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" BUFFER Accompanied by their sister Melody... HELL MEL and THE MARV... THE SK8888888TEEEERRR BBOOOOOOIIIIIZZZZZZZZ!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" MELODY Fuck yeah! BUFFER From South Central L.A... MARCELLUS "ONE EYE" WALLACE and VINCENT "WHITEY" FORD... THE SOUTH CENTRAL MILIIITTTTIIIAAAA!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" BUFFER Hailing from Osaka, Japan... THE DANCE... DANCE... DRRRRRAAAAAAGGOOONN!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" BUFFER All hailing from Green Bay, Wisconsin... they are the OAOAST 6-Man Tag Team Champions of the World... NICK, DICK and RICK GARNER... THE TRRRRIIIIIPPLLLEEE THRREEEEAAAATT!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" BUFFER From the Lone Star State... BARON WINDELS and "THE TEXAS TWISTER" JOCK MULLIGAN... THE LONE STAR GUUUUUUNNSSLLLIIIIINGEEEERRRRRSSSSS!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" BUFFER Accompanied by their manager Rick Heyross... QUENTIN BENJAMIN and CHARLIE MOSS... TEEEAAAAMM HHEEEEEYYYYRROOOOOSSSSSSSSS!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" BUFFER Accompanied by Jade Rodez... "SHOWTIME" SHAYNE and "TREMENDOUS" TYLER... D*LLLLUUUUUUXXXXXXXXXX!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" BUFFER Representing The Lightning Crew... MR BORRRIICCUUUAAAAAA and THE CUBAN WWWAAAAAAAALLLLL!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" BUFFER From Chicago, Illinois... this is JJUUUUMMMBBOOOOOOOOOOO!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" BUFFER And, finally... "EVERYBODY DANCE NOW!!" O! M! G!!!! The roof is in danger of blowing clean off the Trump Plaza as "Everybody Dance Now" by C and C Music Factory thumps through the P.A and the aura, myth and legend that is MISTER WARRIOR sprints down the seemingly endless steps that lead to the ring, pumping his fists in the air like a SUPERMANIAC~! The 19 Men in the ring and the 4 managers/valets/hangers on on the outside don't have a clue what to make of all this, as Mister Warrior jumps to the apron and SHAKES THE ROPES~! Warrior goes around to the opposite side of the ring and SHAKES~! the ropes again, pumping his fists to the fans before entering the ring, which causes the other 19 competitors to back up into the ropes. MELODY Am I the only one who's lost here? JADE Nope. Warrior stands centre ring, pounding his chest and daring someone, anyone to challenge him. Nobody seems willing to do so and Warrior continues to beat his chest in a futile effort to dare someone on. Eventually, Quentin Benjamin reacts...but not by going after Warrior, instead pushing Biff Atlas a step forwards in Mr. Warrior's direction. Biff freezes in fear and cowers to his knees, begging for mercy. But the mighty Warrior knows not the meaning of the word mercy and presses the hula skirt wearing haircare expert over his head! Finally Flex Phillips sees fit to try and save his partner. But as he steps forward, Warrior hurls the weeping Atlas towards his partner. Flex tries to catch Biff in mid-air, but only ends up being barrelled over the top, taking Biff with him as both of Nutrition's Real Gurus end up on the floor of the Trump Plaza! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ FLEX PHILLIPS LEFT: 1st ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Biff Atlas ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ BIFF "SHAMPOO" ATLAS LEFT: 2nd ELIMINATED: Flex Phillips ELIMINATED BY: Mister Warrior LEFT IN RING: 18 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mackenzie is already halfway up the steps and cursing to herself as NRG lay in a huddle on the floor. *DINGDINGDING!* And there's the bell to officially start the match, despite the fact two guys have already been eliminated, and the traditional Battle Royal bundle begins! A mass of bodies leap on Mr. Warrior and try to deal with him, another mass going after the two biggest men in the ring Jumbo and Mr. Boricua. The Triple Threat take Jumbo into a corner and work him over while Cuban Wall tries to come to Boricua's rescue from the four on one assault by D*LUX and The Sk8ter Boiz. The other 7 men- Team Heyross, The Lone Star Gunslingers, The South Central Militia and The Dance Dance Dragon all hover over Mr. Warrior and put the boots to the pink wearing one. MELODY See. Sausage Fest. Jumbo is being hoisted up and is in danger of being eliminated, as meanwhile the 7 on 1 beating continues on Mister Warrior. Eventually Moss adopts himself a leader of the pack and directs traffic, telling the group that they need to dump Warrior out. Baron Windels takes this invitation up and starts to pull Warrior up, bumping into Marcellus Wallace in the process...which kicks off a sudden brawl between the South Central Militia and The Lone Star Gunslingers! They brawl off, allowing Mister Warrior to pop back to his feet and knock down Team Heyross with a double clothesline! Dance Dance Dragon dances his way off out of the way as Warrior goes NUTS~! and throws overhand blows at anything that moves! JADE Man, what a fruitloop. MELODY This is what Mel was like when he had his first beer you know. And it was a Canadian beer too. Going a full circle around the ring, Warrior continues throwing wild rights and lefts. Stopping in the middle of the ring he then pounds his chest and lets out a mighty roar...before turning around and getting goozled by Cuban Wall! Reaching for the tights, Wall sets and DRILLS Mister Warrior with a big Chokeslam! Meanwhile, the Gunslingers/Militia brawl still goes on against one set of ropes, as Marcellus and Vincent have Baron Windels up and on the ropes. Jock Mulligan makes the save though, pulling away Vincent and nailing a right hand. Jock nails Marcellus next, then takes a backstep and looks for a clothesline on "One Eye". Marcellus ducks a shoulder and backdrops Mulligan out...but only to the apron, as Jock grabs the top rope on the way over. Turning around, Marcellus eats two quick fists from Jock who then lands a shoulder to the gut. Jock looks to come back in now but as he looks for a slingshot, Vincent Ford charges... ...AND TUMBLES OVER THE LOWERED ROPES, TO THE FLOOR!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ VINCENT "WHITEY" FORD LEFT: 3rd ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Jock Mulligan LEFT IN RING: 17 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Vinny crashes to the padded arena floor, Marcellus grabs Jock and pulls him back up on the apron, rocking him with hard right hands. Clinging onto the ropes desperately, Jock manages to prevent himself from falling out of the Royal. Marcellus grabs Jock by the hair and clubs him with another big right hand before applying a blatant choke, trying to force Jock to release the ropes. But Jock responds by applying the IRON CLAW~! MELODY Oh yeah, like that hurts. With the Claw applied, Jock drags Marcellus out over the top to the apron. Jock then pulls Mulligan up in the Claw, but gets a boot to the gut. Placing Jock in a standing headscissors, Marcellus gives the signal that he's going for a piledriver, on the apron. Jock wants none of that though and fights his way out with punches to the knees, moving up to the kidneys as he escapes the headscissors...and then lands the Discus Punch on the apron... ...KNOCKING MARCELLUS TO THE FLOOR!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MARCELLUS "ONE EYE" WALLACE LEFT: 4th ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Jock Mulligan LEFT IN RING: 16 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ JADE That's both of the South Central Militia gone...that's good. MELODY Yeah, I agree. If there were a more street way of saying "they be fugly" I'd say it, but there isn't. At least your guys are cute in a manufactured sort of way. Jock recovers himself and re-enters the ring...but as he does, his partner suddenly comes flying past and over the top to the floor!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ BARON WINDELS LEFT: 5th ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Cuban Wall LEFT IN RING: 15 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Realising what happened, the lone Lone Star Gunslinger left in the battle royal goes on the attack with a right hand flurry on Wall. Meanwhile, The Triple Threat still have their problems with the big Jumbo in the corner, unable to lift him up and out. Across the ring, Mr Boricua is having the same problems with The Sk8ter Boiz and D*LUX. Mister Warrior is recovering from the Chokeslam now, shaking as he gets to his feet. Team Heyross have The Dance Dance Dragon elevated and are trying to eliminate him, but here comes Mister Warrior...DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER! Benjamin and Moss wobble around. Benjamin doesn't wobble for long though, as he gets flipped INSIDE OUT with a clothesline from Warrior! MELODY Great move from The Technical Wizard! JADE The wha? MELODY I made it up just now, although I probably should have put in more thought than I did. Oh well. Warrior now takes Moss and whips him into the ropes. Avoiding bodies, Moss rebounds and gets a Big Boot to the face for his trouble! Warrior pumps his fists some more, while The Dance Dance Dragon jogs into view, shuffles the shoulders and drops the big knee, The Strong Style Shuffle! Dragon jumps back up and treats the crowd to a quick DDR routine. MELODY Welcome to a year ago, everyone! JADE But I played that in an arcade two weeks ago. MELODY And you probably also suck on lollipops and play jump rope. You're too nice, that's your problem. Celebrating his kneedrop still, on goes Dragon's routine. But it goes on just a bit too long as when he finally turns back around, Mr. Warrior charges him and bundles the masked dance assassin up and OUT OF THE BATTLE ROYAL!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ DANCE DANCE DRAGON LEFT: 6th ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Mister Warrior LEFT IN RING: 14 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Some of the crowd boo the elimination, probably enjoying the idiocy that is Triple D. Warrior pays them no heed though, shaking the ropes and beating his chest. Turning back to the action, Mister Warrior now relieves some of Mr Boricua's woes as he pulls first Hell Mel and then Shayne Brave out into clubbing rights. Warrior then turns back to Quentin Benjamin. The lifeless body of the Team Heyross member is dragged up and Warrior sets him up for the HUMP Handle Slam, which has Rick Heyross frantic on the floor. As Mr. Warrior lifts Benjamin up though, the amateur wrestling stand-out manages to escape behind. And as Warrior then turns around, Charlie Moss assists his partner and together, they oust Mister Warrior from the Battle Royal with a DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE TO THE FLOOR!! MELODY Ah well, at least he gets paid. From the looks of things that's probably a novelty in itself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MISTER WARRIOR LEFT: 7th ELIMINATED: Flex Phillips, Dance Dance Dragon ELIMINATED BY: Mister Warrior LEFT IN RING: 13 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Landing on his feet, Mister Warrior promptly turns on his heels and sprints back up the steps and out through the curtains. Meanwhile, it's unlucky 13 in the ring. Mr Boricua has fought back and now has "Tremendous" Tyler and The Marv in his clutches, looking for a Double Chokeslam. "Showtime" Shayne and Hell Mel are back to make the save though and they bundle him back into the corner, beginning the process of trying to lift Boricua up and out again. Jumbo has unloaded on The Triple Threat meanwhile, putting down Nick and Rick with a clothesline a-piece. Scooping up Dick, Jumbo now slams the unfortunately named third Garner and bounces off the ropes looking for the XL Splash... ...and gets clotheslined to the mat by Benjamin and Moss! Team Heyross put the boots to Jumbo and Heyross encourages them on from the outside. The other two men in the match meanwhile are Jock Mulligan and Cuban Wall, exchanging right hands until Wall lands a knee and scoops Jock up. Over the top floats Jock though, spinning Wall around and looking for the IRON CLAW~! Wall blocks though and lands a knee to the gut, doubling Mulligan over for a big Powerbomb! JADE So who did you bet on anyway, if you didn't bet on Mel or Marv? MELODY The fat guy. JADE Boricua? MELODY No, the other one. JADE Jumbo? MELODY Yeah. He dresses like a pimp, so he's gotta be tough I figure. Wall points a finger down at the motionless Jock, adding some insult to injury. However, he should probably be more concerned with Mr Boricua, who's found himself up across the top rope, being lifted by four struggling bodies. D*LUX and The Sk8ter Boiz have spent the entire match focusing on Boricua and they're determined to oust the bigman. Looking around to see if there's any more help, the four realise they're still on their own and with their energy sapping, Boricua is able to pick each of the four off with overhand strikes. JADE Oh no, we're boned. MELODY I'm not. I bet on Jumbo, remember? Boricua finally manages to escape from the corner and grabs Hell Mel, dropping him back down with a monster headbutt. In runs "Tremendous" Tyler, only to get picked off with a tremendous clothesline that knocks him clean off of his feet! Next in line is Shayne Brave, grabbed by the throat and dropped with a devestating Chokeslam! Feeling mighty pleased with himself, the bigman lets out a mighty scream...but suddenly, a triple attack catches him by surprise! The Triple Threat attack Boricua from behind with The Mugging, clubbing down with forearms until Boricua falls to hands and knees, at which point they turn to crowd and stick out their tongues Demolition style! Kinda like that. Unfortunately, they forget about Boricua's back up. Cuban Wall sneaks up behind and throws Rick and Dick together, apparantely causing Rick to bite his tongue in the process. Realising there's a problem, Nick looks to beg off from Wall. But Wall is already charging towards him, clotheslining Nick up and OVER THE TOP! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ NICK GARNER LEFT: 8th ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Cuban Wall LEFT IN RING: 12 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Still worrying about his tongue, Rick turns around and Wall is waiting, pressing Rick high up above his head. Wall displays his power for a second or two before turning and pitching Rick forward, AND OUT ONTO NICK AT RINGSIDE!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RICK GARNER LEFT: 9th ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Cuban Wall LEFT IN RING: 11 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wall is cleaning house, but his spring cleaning is interrupted by a certain Jock Mulligan attacking him from behind. Jock brawls away with Wall as Boricua has now recovered and clambers back to his feet...finding himself face to face with the 440 pound Jumbo, who has KOed Team Heyross with a double clothesline and is now looking to test the next biggest man in the match! Boricua has the height advantage, but Jumbo has the weight, the two squaring up in the centre of the ring causing a buzz around the Trump Plaza. The two bigmen stare each other down, until Boricua finally strikes with a right hand. But Jumbo fires right back! Boricua! Jumbo! Boricua! Jumbo! MELODY Somebody throw a dropkick already! The two bigmen suddenly stop exchanging bombs and in unison grab each other by the throat, tussling each other towards the ropes and trying to dump each other out. Both men teeter over the top rope, but they know that if one goes, so does the other, which leaves them at a stalemate over the ropes. That's where Team Heyross come in though, as the crafty duo sneak over and barge into the combined 740 pounds, SENDING BOTH TOPPLING OVER AND OUT!! JADE YAY! MELODY Yay? Yay!?! This isn't good...c'mon Marv! C'mon Mel! JADE Wait, you're routing for them now? MELODY Hey, I need some money now Jumbo's gone, else Terry Taylor's gonna have my legs broke! If they win, we can split the prize money 50/25/25. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ JUMBO LEFT: 10th ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Charlie Moss, Quentin Benjamin ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MR. BORICUA LEFT: 11th ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Charlie Moss, Quentin Benjamin LEFT IN RING: 9 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Team Heyross go on the attack now and put the boots to the two members of D*LUX, while Boricua and Jumbo are told by a bevy of very afraid referees that they should now leave...maybe...if it's not too much trouble. The other five men in the match are battling now, Wall and Jock Mulligan exchanging punches in a corner which Wall seems to be getting the better of, while The Sk8ter Boiz grab Dick Garner. Hitting a double backhand to the gut, The Boiz whip Dick into the ropes and execute a HIGH double backbody drop! MELODY Mel and Marv, sharing a Dick. So many jokes, yet so little time. With Dick down, The Boiz now go after Team Heyross. Mel lands a punchfest on Moss, Marv doing the same to Benjamin as they back them into the ropes. Mel and Marv then give the signal to each other and whip Team Heyross across the ring, throwing up some RAWK before ducking their heads. Marv gets the backdrop on Benjamin, but Moss blocks with a boot to the shoulderblades, popping Hell Mel upright for an Exploder Suplex! THE MARV \m/ \m/ MELODY Idiot. It takes a few moments and, more importantly, a Northern Lariat from Moss to alert Marv to the fact his partner's backdrop didn't work out. Moss wastes no time in picking The Marv back up and throwing him into the turnbuckles, taking the legs and lifting Marv up for a possible elimination. Marv clings onto the middle rope desperately and makes himself as frustratingly squirmy as possible, buying himself some time before "Showtime" Shayne pulls Charlie Moss away and knocks him down with a dropkick! JADE Looks like our teams are helping each other out. That's cute. MELODY Woah woah, my team? Mel and Marv? JADE Yeah...remember, after Jumbo got thrown out... MELODY Oh yeah! Sorry, I'm not used to being supportive of my brothers see, you threw me off-guard for a second. Shayne pops right back up and gives Benjamin a taste of his partner's fate with a dropkick too. Meanwhile, as Shayne puts the beating on Team Heyross, Mel pulls himself slowly back up. Still dazed from the Exploder, Mel falls to one knee and shakes out the cobwebs. But from behind, a knee from Dick Garner to the kidneys softens Mel up, allowing him to be pitched CLEAN OVER THE TOP AND TO THE FLOOR WITH A SPLAT!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ HELL MEL LEFT: 12th ELIMINATED: Nobody ELIMINATED BY: Dick Garner LEFT IN RING: 8 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MELODY And now I remember why I don't route for them. As Mel comes to a gravity and concrete assisted stop, the smiling Dick backs into the centre of the ring and shows off some DOUBLE BICEPS~! for the Plaza fans! MELODY You know, Dick's a lot cuter than his brothers. JADE They're identical triplets. MELODY Oh I know that, I'm just saying he's a lot cuter than his brothers, identical or not. Don't you agree Jade? Do you like Dick? JADE Not gonna work on me, sorry. MELODY You're no fun. Get Coach back out here, he's dumb enough to profess his love for the Dick. Dick eventually re-focuses himself on the match and unloads some stomps on Tyler Bryant. Meanwhile, Team Heyross have ganges up on Shayne Brave and look to lead him to the ropes, only to be stopped by Hell Mel and his Hellish punches! Mel and Shayne now team up and take Moss and Benjamin respectively, sending them across the ring with a double whip and executing stereo dropkicks! Mel jumps up and plays AIR GUITAR~!, Shayne settling for a little boyband style choreographed dancing, before they turn around...DOUBLE CHOKESLAM BY CUBAN WALL!! JADE Eep! MELODY YAY...uh...I mean, eep, I guess. Looking around the ring, Wall sees himself as the only person standing and not one person who could easily throw him from this Battle Royal. This thought comes 3/4 of the way around though and probably should have been saved until after Jock Mulligan soars off the top rope with a Diving Lariat! Wall is straight back up, but so is Mulligan, unloading with right hands on the muscle of The Lightning Crew and eventually backing him up against the ropes. Still the big right hands connect, Wall staggered up against the ropes and with no defence as Mulligan rears back one last time and...Wall throws out a foot...but Jock adeptly catches it with one hand and applies THE IRON CLAW~! Wall begins to fight it immediately, but it turns out to be just a set-up move, as Jock quickly releases the hold and nails a Discus Punch, sending Wall OVER THE TOP... ...HANGING OVER THE TOP... ...AND WITH A PUSH, HE'S GONE!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CUBAN WALL LEFT: 13th ELIMINATED: Baron Windels, Nick Garner, Rick Garner ELIMINATED BY: Jock Mulligan LEFT IN RING: 7 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mulligan leans over the ropes, revenge sought and found for his partner... ...but as his back is turned, Dick Garner creeps up behind and grabs Jock by the head, turning him to the adjacent ropes and pitching him ove...NO, reversed, AND DICK FLIES TO THE FLOOR... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ DICK GARNER LEFT: 14th ELIMINATED: Hell Mel ELIMINATED BY: Jock Mulligan LEFT IN RING: 6 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ...BUT JOCK ISN'T FAR BEHIND, THANKS TO TEAM HEYROSS!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "THE TEXAS TWISTER" JOCK MULLIGAN LEFT: 15th ELIMINATED: Vincent Ford, Marcellus Wallace, Cuban Wall, Dick Garner ELIMINATED BY: Charlie Moss, Quentin Benjamin LEFT IN RING: 5 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MELODY Now we're getting somewhere. Three in quick succession gone and HOW THE HELL IS MARV STILL IN!?! Benjamin and Moss celebrate briefly before turning back to the ring, where they suddenly realise who's left. Both members of D*LUX, but also The Marv who has been working with the popstar wannabees all match. It's 3 on 2 odds for Team Heyross and now it's a case of mind over matter, staying cautiously clear of the trio for now as they try to discuss some sort of strategy. Rick Heyross climbs to the apron to join in the team conference, while Shayne looks over the ropes and down to Sofa Central to Jade, who simply gives her charge a thumbs up. Not great advice, but good motivation I guess. MELODY Hey, if you can get your guys to throw themselves out, I'll split the winnings with you. JADE But you didn't bet on Marv. You only want him to win so you can pay off your losses, remember? MELODY Oh. Yeah. Curses! Serious looks adorn the faces of Team Heyross as they creep ever so slightly forwards, offering up amateur style knuckle locks. Marv takes the bait from Benjamin and they lock up, but D*LUX have other ideas and go after Moss with a barrage of forearms, taking him into a corner. And it's they who are wiser, as Marv is promptly takes up with a waistlock and slammed face-first to the canvas by Benjamin! Benjamin sprints over and helps out Moss now and it's Heyross vs. D*LUX in one corner of the ring, while Marv rubs at his secksy facial features. "D - LUX!" "D - LUX!" "D - LUX!" "D - LUX!" The brawl continues in the corner until Marv recovers his bearings, coming over and pulling Benjamin around into a big roundhouse right! The Marv gives Moss a right hand too before going back to Benjamin, sending him off into the ropes with an irish whip. Grabbing the ropes on the way back, Benjamin puts on the brakes and tries to lure Marv into a charge. Expecting a backdrop, the suddenly wise Sk8ter Boi declines, forcing Benjamin to run in...and get caught with an Inverted Atomic Drop. The Marv backs off the ropes behind him and looks for a Swinging DDT. Benjamin manages to block that though and throws Marv forward, only for The Marv to land on his feet. In charges Benjamin, but his clothesline is ducked. And so is a back elbow, The Marv on the charge as he leaps to the middle rope... ...AND GETS PUSHED OVER THE TOP BY A LUNGING CHARLIE MOSS!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ THE MARV LEFT: 16th ELIMINATED: ELIMINATED BY: Charlie Moss LEFT IN RING: 4 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MELODY Crap. Do you have a hundred bucks I can borrow? JADE Uhm, no. It's down to a tag team situation now with Team Heyross and D*LUX left. Tyler Bryant abandons Moss to go after Benjamin, while Shayne takes Moss in a waistlock from behind before trying to muscle him up over the top. Moss puts the block on that and grips onto the ropes for safety, as Tyler whips Benjamin into a corner across the ring. He then follows in with a charge, which Benjamin blocks with a boot to the face. Away staggers Tyler as Benjamin grabs him behind the head, pitching him OVER THE TOP... ...BUT TYLER HANGS ON!! JADE Okay, that was too close. Landing on the apron, Tyler scrambles to gain his footing and lands a forearm strike on Benjamin. Tyler then climbs to the top as Benjamin is staggering away, balancing himself up top and launching forward with a high crossbody blo...NO, Benjamin counters, guiding Tyler down into a Gutbuster!! "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Quentin now gives Moss a helping hand, dragging Shayne off of him and striking him in the back of the head with a forearm shot. Falling to his knees, a grimace masks Shayne's face, as Benjamin strikes him again before discussing strategy some more with Moss. Team Heyross decide on a double front facelock and land some more forearms over the back before, with their backs to the ropes, attempting to take Brave out of the battle royal with a double suplex. Kicking his feet, Shayne re-centres his gravity (or something) enough to land back on his feet. More forearms soften Shayne back up though before Team Heyross try again. This time though, a semi-recovered Tyler Bryant sees his partner in trouble and manages to grab his legs on the way, pulling him to safe ground. Team Heyross don't realise what's happened and try again, but this time Tyler grabs Shayne in a wheelbarrow position. Benjamin and Moss release Shayne, but he gets his hands up and pushes himself off the mat with a little help from Tyler, hooking both members of Team Heyross in facelocks. Tyler then releases Shayne which allows "Showtime" to swing forward and spike Benjamin and Moss with DDTs! "YYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" JADE Wahoo, great teamwork guys! MELODY Yippee kayyay! Can you be a little less happy here please, I'm trying to work something out here. (calculator tapping) Ah, CRAP! Helping each other to their feet, D*LUX regroup and go through Benjamin with a double clothesline. Moss recieves the same before D*LUX pick Benjamin back up. Tyler lifts QB up and drops him with an inverted atomic drop, Shayne already rushing the ropes for the Yakuza Kick to complete Opposites Attract...but Benjamin ducks, Shayne running into a backbody drop from Moss... ...AND LANDING ON THE APRON! Moss turns around and looks for a right hand, which gets blocked and returned by "Showtime". Hitting another two rights, Shayne has Moss dazed enough to attempt a suplex to the floor. However, the heavier Moss drops his body weight and prevents Shayne from getting him over. Shayne lands some more right hand and tries again, but again Moss is too heavy. And this time, Charlie counters with a suplex of his own to bring Shayne back in. Shayne starts to twist in mid-air, trying to slide behind Moss. But Moss backsteps and catches the legs, draping Shayne's throat across the top rope in the process and leaving him in perfect position for some patented Team Heyross, Benjamin leapfrogging his partner and driving his body weight down across the lower back of "Showtime" Shayne! JADE Oh no...come on Tyler! This isn't good... MELODY You're telling me, Rooster's gonna have me kneecapped if I don't find $100 in like 5 minutes. He'll do it too. No fooling. Shayne falls across the middle rope holding his back, Moss choking him on the ropes while Benjamin goes for Tyler. Sidestepping, he aims a superkick at Tyler which gets ducked. But Quentin reacts quickly and strikes with a backhand to the abdomen, doubling Tyler over and setting for a DDT. Tyler puts the blocks on though, lifting Benjamin up and over the ropes... ...PLACING HIM ON THE APRON ONLY. Benjamin has suddenly tightened his front facelock and is now choking Tyler out across the top rope, wrapping his legs around Tyler's waist with a body scissors. As Benjamin continues to choke Tyler out, over comes Moss with a clubbing shot to the back of Tyler. Benjamin now releases the front facelock to steady himself on the apron and tells Moss to set Tyler up for the leapfrog/guillotine. Moss does just that, raising Tyler's legs up, as Benjamin springboards into the ring and hits the ropes, springing back... ...AND GETTING CLOTHESLINED TO THE FLOOR BY A CHARGING SHAYNE BRAVE, WHO ALSO TOPPLES TO THE FLOOR!! JADE AAAHHHHHH!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ QUENTIN BENJAMIN LEFT: 17th ELIMINATED: Jumbo, Mr Boricua, Jock Mulligan ELIMINATED BY: Shayne Brave ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "SHOWTIME" SHAYNE BRAVE LEFT: 18th ELIMINATED: Quentin Benjamin ELIMINATED BY: N/A LEFT IN RING: 2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jumping to the apron, Heyross frantically tries to warn an unsuspecting Moss what happened. Moss turns his head around to see what happened, but in doing so he loses his focus and track of the fact that Tyler Bryant's feet are still over his shoulders. Pushing off the top rope, Tyler tumbles forwards and takes Moss over with a headscissors, sending Moss over the top... ...MOSS HANGS ON THOUGH, SKINNING THE CAT... ...AND GETTING DROPKICKED HALFWAY UP, CAUSING HIM TO CRASH BACK TO THE FLOOR!! "YYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" JADE YES! YES YES YES! *DINGDINGDING!* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHARLIE MOSS LEFT: 19th ELIMINATED: Jumbo, Mr Boricua, Jock Mulligan ELIMINATED BY: Tyler Bryant LEFT IN THE RING: 1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "TREMENDOUS" TYLER BRYANT TEH WINN0R~! ELIMINATED: Charlie Moss ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tyler pushes up to his knees and grins from ear to ear as first Shayne Brave and then Jade Rodez enter the ring and join the celebrations. Meanwhile, Rick Heyross throws a fit on the floor unable to believe how disasterously everything suddenly went wrong. BUFFER Your winner of the Battle Royal... "TREMENDOUS" TYLER BBRRRRYYYAAAAANNTT!!! "YYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" D*LUX and Jade continue to celebrate in the ring, but you're not worried about that, because it's AngleMania time! ************************************************** TV-14 L,V * DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA * Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid shock and delight. THE OAOAST...WHAT THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD IS READING~!

So the card is... PK vs. Alf (World Title) Rockers vs. NNMX (Tag Titles) PRL vs. Rodez (24/7 Title) Two for the Money Black T vs. Drek/Hoff Columbian Heat vs. Vitamin X Bo/CW vs. COD Feel free to tell me what I've missed.

Adam. Apparently he's no longer a "Nice Guy." I'm still nice, this name's just easier to remember. In my old age of 19, I need to make it easier on myself. Alright, well you know how crazy this place gets after Mania, so the show won't be going up until a decent time after that. If I can get it up before my last class this afternoon I shall, but if not it'll be later.

I have to wait another two days to see it. Hooray. I'll download it before then.

That was great. The Main Event tomorrow night is going to be very, very interesting.

Wow, this is nuclear.

Yeah, Im having a bit of trouble every now and again.

Greg, stop talking about your kids. No one gives a fuck.

Bobby with the April Fools! Hahaha, brilliant.

The only way that post could be more ironic is if it was coming from Banky.

That post sucked, because we'll never see the AIDS Monster again.

28. The room is spinning

Dutch saved the thread.

Zuh? I know Sonjay is based in the US, not sure about his background, but really, zuh?

You win.

You're my hero.

Lets break it down slightly. Brand and Maggette are much better players now than in 05-06. Brand has become more of a scoring Power Forward than a rebounding one, as noted in his stats from the two seasons, which I am looking at right now. Jeff McInnis averaged 14, 2 and 6 in 01-02. Cassell has so far averaged 17, 3 and 6. Those stats are close, but you can't deny that Cassell has a larger overall impact on the way the team plays than McInnis. Cuttino Mobley has 15.7 PPG, 4.6RPG and 3.2APG, and has also made a major impact. Lamar Odom had slightly better numbers overall at 13, 6 and 5. Chris Kaman has been playing a blinder all year, with 11.5PPG, 9.5RPG, and 1.4BPG thrown in. These are slightly better than Michael Olowakandi's 11 and 8. Off the bench, Q-Rich and Miles were both very solid, but then again, so are Vladimir Radmanovic and Shaun Livingston. By the numbers, the teams are pretty much even, with this years' team averaging 2 more points per game, and having slightly better shooting percentages from the field and the line (although the 01-02 team did better from beyond the arc, but come on, they had Q). Overall, it comes down to record. The 01-02 team finished at 39-43. The current Clippers team, with 13 games left, is already two wins above that. Now, argue the hypotheticals all you want, but those are the stats.

If the mods would look at his posts in the V for Vendetta thread, and last weeks NBA thread, they'd see his stupidity and general annoyance. Please.

Yep, Leena does contribute intelligent discussion in Sports and LSD. Fanofcoils is a tool.

University of Tasmania, Australia - Just started my second year of a combined degree majoring in Journalism and Marketing/Business Management.

Just read the V for Vendetta thread, and I think I lost IQ points. That and his idiotic Clippers argument should get him banned.

I really should ignore Banky like everyone else does.

Wait, he said what? Doesn't he get the concept of time?

Niskie brings the sleeze.