Ted the Poster

"Sean Combs"- ugh. Yuna has problems.

In soviet Russia, we have no Original Score! Prisoner of Azkaban sucked, btw.

Anybody else hear that BANG noise? FUCK I JUST GOT SHOT

In that Vin Diesel movie, he's the only cast member with any star power. Well, if you count Ron Silver, that's two. Is Beyonce performing all the other songs tonight too? She's not that good, really.

Was that Vin Diesel? I thought I heard a smidge of talent. Might be indigestion though.

HOO-HAH~!

SM2! That's right! *laughs at Bob*

SIDEWAYS~!

GoodFellas, Raging Bull... and Taxi Driver? SNL ALUMS UNITE!

Ugh. That Shrek song really shouldn't win. What the fuck is Sandler doing at the Oscars? I guess Rock pulled some strings.

Good Carson tribute. Anybody else chuckle when DiCaprio said "Tupac"?

You know, Jar Jar being the centerpiece of that picture really puts the series in perspeective. It also makes me want to dismember George Lucas.

I'm not fat at all, actually. I don't know what would make you think that.

He doesn't really deserve one, either.

The over/under at my house for number of assholes making political statements is four. I picked the over.

Yeah, I always get excited when they do that on AMW too. You hear "Update!" and think that they finally caught the fucker, then it's "the suspect was recently seen in Pasaic, NJ..."

"I want you to give this scumbag a cavity search! I'm talking Roto-Rooter! Don't stop until you reach the back of his teeth!"

Flower dicovers his obvious homosexuality, does a lot of ecstacy and listens to nothing but pop music.

What was that?

This is almost exactly like an episode of Law and Order. Creepy. Oh, and triple whoa.

I've had four cats get hit by cars in a six year period. Only one of 'em lived, and he had to get a fucking hip replacement. So yeah, fuck your old cat. Mine don't even live past five.

Is it me, or did Ebert lose a lot of his love for movies when ol' Lumpyhead died.

Undoubtedly. Fuck this movie. If I want to see Patrick Stewart do voice work, I'll pop in my Nausicaa DVD. The Mulan sequel is mediocre. That guy may sound very similar to Eddie Murphy, but it just isn't the same.

Meanwhile, you seemingly can't ever utilize one. My apologies. That was admittedly really easy too.

For good reason.