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Gary Floyd

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Blog Entries posted by Gary Floyd

  1. Gary Floyd
    20.) Deathspell Omega-Fas - Ite, Maledicti, in Ignem Aeternum (2007)
    19.) Caina-Mourner (2007)
    18.) Weakling-Dead as Dreams (2000)
    17.) The Angelic Process-Weighing Souls With Sand (2007)
    16.) Amesoeurs-Ruines Humaines (2006) / Blut Aus Nord-The Work Which Transforms God (2004) (tie)
    15.) Nachtmystium-Assasins: Black Meddle Pt. 1 (2008)
    14.) Wolves in the Throne Room-Two Hunters (2007)
    13.) Origin-Antithesis (2008)
    12.) Agalloch-Ashes Against the Grain (2006)
    11.) Mastodon-Blood Mountain (2006)
    10.) Katatonia-Last Fair Deal Gone Down (2001)
    9.) Drudkh-Autumn Aurora (2004)
    8.) Nile-In Their Darkened Shrines (2002)
    7.) Artcturus-The Sham Mirrors (2002)
    6.) Isis-Oceanic (2002)/Opeth-Blackwater Park (tie)
    5.) Sleep-Dopesmoker (2003)
    4.) Jesu-Jesu (2005)
    3.) Mastodon-Leviathan (2004)
    2.) Agalloch-The Mantle (2002)
    1.) Electric Wizard-Dopethtone (2000)
  3. Gary Floyd
    Let's talk about some of the music coming out (or has already come out)
     
    Kanye West-Heartbreak and 808's-If it weren't for Cryptopsy's The King Beneath, this would be the worst album of the year. It has a neat idea (old 808 drum machine beats and electro/synth pop production), but it's terrible overall. Also, I fucking hate Auto-Tune/The Vocalizer.
     
    Metallica-Death Magnetic-Wow, they still got it. While hardly their best work, it's a step in the right direction, and almost forgives the sins of Re-Load and St. Anger. There's a few weak tracks ("Unforgiven III", "The Judas Kiss"), but not bad overall.
     
    Darkspace-Darkspace III-Ambient Black Metal done right. A good, cold winter night outside album, with a good use of keyboards (holy shit, they actually know how to use a synth!), and some effective atmosphere. It may be a bit too long (79 minutes and 14 seconds), but if you have patience for this sort of thing, it's good. Also, if you want an equally good, but shorter, go with Coldworld's Melancolie².
     
    Q Tip-The Renaissance-Yeah, this is the best hip hop album of the year bar none. Nobody's paying attention to it, which is a shame. "Johnny is Dead" is a great song BTW.
     
    The Killers-Day and Age-Not as fun as Hot Fuss, but better than Sam's Town, it at least sees them remembering "hey, we're a dance band that's supposed to be disposable fun." The single suck, and Brandon Flowers still can't write lyrics for shit, but oh well. Hardly an album of the year, but not terrible either. File it under the same category as Hot Fuss-a guilty pleasure-and you got something.
     
    Re Up Gang-Clipse Presents the Re Up Gang and We Got it For Cheap Vol. 3-The official first Re Up Gang album is pretty unspectacular, though the We Got it For Cheap Vol. 3 mixtape, while not as awesome as the last one, is awesome none the less, and a fave on my IPod.
     
    Ad.ver.sary-Bone Music-Definately one of the most slept on albums of the year, this is the best industrial album of the year.
  5. Gary Floyd
    When I was watching "American Dad" last inght, I remembered something: this is a show that is better than "Family Guy" in so many ways.
     
    First, let's get this out of the way: I used to really like "Family Guy." I really did. Then it got renewed. I still liked it, but couldn't deny it was lacking. Then I saw the Superbowl episode, and I started to realize maybe it wasn't that good. Then I saw older episodes on Adult Swim, and came to the conclusion that it had always been hit and miss in the past, and now sucked. Now it just get's worse. I tried to watch it last night, and let's just say "South Park" was right.
     
    However, Seth Macfarlene has another show that airs after "Family Guy." It's called "American Dad." At first, I didn't like it. Then I started to warm up to it. Now I've realized that it's not only better than "Family Guy", but is everything that "Family Guy" should be. It's funnier, uses pop culture references in away that's not annoying (no annoying cut away gags or too many jokes that overstay their welcome-plus come on, a tribute to "The Warriors" and using Joy Division's song "Love Will Tear Us Apart"? That's gold), is more plot driven (and interesting), has less annoying characters, has social and political satire that doesn't annoy me-it's just the better of the two.
     
    Basically, while "Family Guy" get's more annoying and lazy, "American Dad" gets better. Last night may have been my favorite episode yet too. Shame "Family Guy" is more popular, but at least I get a funnier show out of "American Dad." Just saying...
     
     
  6. Gary Floyd

    Some things to note

    By Gary Floyd,

    Ok, here's some things to note at the moment, including a little something to those who bitched about me being glad Obama won
     
    -First things first: I hate dumb "Bush=Hitler" and Bush looks like a chimp shit as much as the next guy. Come on, I don't like the guy, but that shit's not only childish, but also retarded. That's why I also don't want to hear shit like "Obamessiah" and "Obama, lol don't you mean Osama" shit either. It's stupid not matter how you lean politically, and if you talk like that, then grow up.
     
    -It's pretty cold at the moment, and even snowed briefly today. So yeah, it feels like fall. Funny that it was like 65 last week. Guess that means it's time for my fall/summer listening/ some black metal (well, black metal that doesn't suck), dark folk music, Alice in Chain's acoustic material, a little Trip Hop (Terranova's "Close the Door" and Hooverphonic's "A New Sterophonic Sound Spectacular" work well), a little Doom Metal (Electric Wizard and Burning Witch), a little ambient, Depeche Mode (that works every season though), and some Shoegazer (ditto.) So, what's the weather like for you guys, and what do you listen to this time of year?
     
    -KANERULESFAN is an awesome gimmick. Seriously, this guy is hilarious, and the best gimmick in a long time.
     
    -And finally, I treat a bitch like 7 Up, never have never will.
  8. Gary Floyd
    Yeah, you know how we do this
     
    Valentine (CW)-Haven't seen it. A lot of the new shows seem aimed at women.
     
    Star Wars: The Clone Wars (Cartoon Network)-While I'm not a "Star Wars" fan, it's better than expected. B-
     
    Pushing Daisies(ABC)-It's back, and I still love it. Funny, odd, and kinda cute. A
     
    True Blood(HBO)-Finally, a TV show about Vampires that gets it right. Good acting, interesting characters, and vampires who don't hate themselves. B+
     
    The Shield: The Final Season(FX)-Back, and still one of the best shows around. Shame it's the last season though. A+
     
    Sons of Anarchy (FX)-Pretty good show. Ron Perlman pretty much steals the show. B+
     
    Superjail (Adult Swim)-I love this. Frequently gory and hilarious, with an animation style that reminds me of the shows that were on MTV's "Liquid Television" and "Cartoon Sushi" B+
     
    Gary Unmarried-No. Just no. F

    It's Always Sunny in Philidelphia (FX)-Still pretty funny, and I love it. B+
     
    Do Not Disturb (ABC)-Again, no. F
     
    Fringe (Fox)-Not bad, but not really exciting me that much so far. B
     
    Knight Rider (NBC)-Worst show of the season? Without a doubt. F

    Dexter Season Three (Showtime)-I love this show. Just really well written and acted, and with very few flaws. A
     
    Chuck Season Two (NBC)-I'm really liking it so far-it's even better than the first season. B+
  10. Gary Floyd
    What? Seriously, what the fuck? To say this sucks is an understatement. This is an abortion. In the pantheon of bad Metal albums, it's up there with Metallica's St. Anger, Slayer's Diablos in Musica, Pantera's pre Cowboys From Hell material, and Celtic Frosts Cold Lake. Seriously, fuck this shit. Worst album of the year.
  11. Gary Floyd

    The End of Deon Dark

    By Gary Floyd,

    Deon's regime as a poster: July 3rd, 2003-September 21st, 2008
     
    That's five years too long.
     
    Yep, Deon's been banned. You may know Deon as "Rocky", "MVP", and "Douchebag." The reign of terror is over.
     
    Who was Deon? Come on, if you're reading this, you know who he is. He's a poster so bad nobody would defend him. A poster so bad that even Marvin, EHME in the past, and WP look good in comparison. A man so stupid that he had no idea why people hated him so much, even though it was practically spelled out to him. A man who's thread bumping almost made Vanhalen's look good by comparison. A man who bragged about ruining an ex girlfriend's life, and had no shame about it. A man even much of the WWE folder didn't like. A man with no defenders-even wildpegasus and Marvin have defenders.
     
    No he's gone.
     
    Good riddance too. I've made no secret of my hatred of Deon. He was quite possibly the worst poster on the board. Sure, cabbageboy, Truthiness, Enigma, Marvin, etc. aren't what you'd call good either, but they just annoy me. Deon was so bad I'd cringe whenever he posted. He was possibly the only poster on the board that has actually made me mad. That's right, Deon was so bad, it pissed me off. Now, thank God, he's gone. Ceased to be in the board.
     
    Only question is, who do I rip on now? Well, we'll see. For now a celebration is in order, because Deon is finally gone.
     
    Happy Days indeed.
  15. Gary Floyd
    "Kobe, how does my ass taste?"
     
     
     
    That was the question Shaq asked Kobe as his rival's tongue went to work on his soiled sphincter. It was sturdy to say the least, hungrily lapping up everything it could, and not ignoring a single part of the rancid poop shoot. He just dug deeper, practically munching away as he felt some solid waste exit the putrid black hole.
     
    "GOD DAMNIT!" Shaq yelled orgasmically, jerking his large member as pre cum soaked his knuckles. Kobe was incredible at this-it was his specialty. He did it to Steve Nash earlier that week, and he had plans for Joe Crawford later on.
     
    Shaq's finger's gripped the swollen member. It felt like a firehose ready to go off at any second, yet the Phoenix Sun was able to hold it off-even at the sight of Kobe wildly eating out his shit stained shitter, feces dribbling from his chin like a grotesque milkshake, all while caressing his own member with extreme force.
     
    Nothing lasts forever though, and by the power of Shaq-Fu, Shaq's rectum fired liquid cannon into Kobe's gullet, soaking his face and mouth with diarrhea as Kobe ejaculated a fire hydrant like load into Shaq's gaping maul.
     
    Looking deep into each other's eyes, the two shared a French kiss, semen and feces mingling into each other's mouth to create something not even the Fu-Schnickens would consume.

    "Delicious" Kobe replied.
  16. Gary Floyd

    Dead Man's Party

    By Gary Floyd,

    I'm all dressed up with nowhere to go
    Walkin' with a dead man over my shoulder

    Waiting for an invitation to arrive
    Goin' to a party where no one's still alive

    CHORUS
    I was struck by lighting
    Walkin' down the street
    I was hit by something last night in my sleep
    It's a dead man's party
    Who could ask for more
    Everybody's comin', leave your body at the door
    Leave your body and soul at the door . . .
    (Don't run away it's only me)

    All dressed up with nowhere to go
    Walkin' with a dead man
    Waitin' for an invitation to arrive
    With a dead man . . . Dead Man . . .

    Got my best suit and my tie
    Shiny silver dollar on either eye
    I hear the chauffeur comin' to the door
    Says there's room for maybe just one more . . .

    CHORUS

    Don't run away it's only me
    Don't be afraid of what you can't see
    Don't run away it's only me . . .
  17. Gary Floyd

    To The WWE Folder

    By Gary Floyd,

    CM Punk jobbing to Jericho and not being in the Main Event on PPV is nothing to complain about. Face it, Punk's not ready for that kind of push yet. Please get that sand out of your vaginas and stop whining.
  18. Gary Floyd
    Clone Wars is bad, but not "I wanna kill myself bad" that some are making it out to be, though I didn't go in with high expectations-it's at least better than Phantom Menace. I actually wasn't annoyed by Ahoska, though The baby Hutt and the gay Hutt I call "Capote the Hutt" are a different story all together. Just remember that this is a minor movie made for kids-nothing more nothing less-and if you don't go into it with high expectations, then you'll be alright.
     
    Mirrors is a wasted movie. There's 3 kills total (not bad ones either-the "jaw ripping" scene is worthy of Fulci), and it all feels like a Fulci movie-that is, one he did in his decline. It's also too long (nearly 2 hours) and poorly acted (especially Kiefer Sutherland). That out of the way, it's a rare example if a remake that's better than the original (the original is really boring), and isn't too bad-just boring.
     
    Both get 4/10.
  19. Gary Floyd

    3 movies in a week

    By Gary Floyd,

    I already saw "Tropic Thunder" (which is great). Tonight it's that animated "Star Wars" movie (friend keeps bugging me over it, so I finally caved in-Christ, I don't even like "Star Wars" that much) and tomorrow it's "Mirrors"." Expect reactions on Sunday.
  20. Gary Floyd
    Well, here's what happened this week in case you've been living under a rock
     
    -John Edwards admitted to an affair with a woman while his wife has cancer. Class act. I'm sure Newt thinks he's an amatuer though. That reminds me: what is it with politicians and ugly chicks? Why can't they take a page out of Kennedy's book and nail a hot chick? You guys are fucking politicians, you can get better pussy.
     
    -Somebody was stabbed, killed, and decapitated on a bus in Manitoba. Westboro Baptist Church is there to tell people they are going to hell (really, I'm just apathetic towards these guys now. I've heard so much from them or about them that they are just old news), and or pals at PETA are behaving in the dignified way expected by running an add saying the guy's death is nowhere near as bad as killing an animal. Stay classy PETA.
     
    -John McCain keeps running negative adds, alienating old fans in a way that Bill Clinton alienated old fans this year.
     
    -Brett Farve got traded to the Jets-oh go away Brett. Seriously, go away, quit whining, quit crying, and quit being a little bitch. And for God's sake, it wouldn't kill you to shave more often. This has given ESPN even more reasons to suck as well, as if it weren't already possible.
     
    -"Pineapple Express" is pretty awesome, though it didn't beat "The Dark Knight." Also, good to see Rosie Perez still getting work.
     
    -R.I.P. Bernie Mac. You were the best thing about the "Ocean's" movies, and Milky is right when he says your role as "Officer Self-Hatred" in "Don't Be A Menace" is great.
     
    -Finally:

     
     
  21. Gary Floyd
    Because I went to a Radiohead concert. Here's a run down of what happened:
     

    It was a 4-5 hour drive, and I was fucking exhausted. Took me about 30 minutes to regain some energy. I got there early so I could get good lawn seats, and so I could get a good parking space. First things I saw at the parking lot: a guy vomiting in the bushes and some hippies. Fortunately, not to many. Beer was $10, so no getting drunk tonight. Cool T-Shirts I saw: A Neu! shirt, a Corgi T-Shirt (I love Corgis), and a Jesu T-Shirt. Minimal Techno music played before sets. I recognized the Vlasdiv (sic) Delay and Basic Channel tracks. Opening act was Grizzlybear. They were alright, and came off as nice guys. Before Radiohead's set, there were the obligatory ads. I can happily say I've never heard a Jonas Brothers song in my life. Also Bill Maher has a really obvious receding hairline. Radiohead were great. "National Anthem", "Body Snatchers", "Idioteque", "Pyramid Song", "Dollars and Cents", "There There", and "Everything In It's Right Place" are fucking experiences live. So yeah, a really stellar live show full of energy from both the band and the crowd. There was an asshole behind me (obviously on E) who kept bumping into me, so I moved. He looked a lot like Marvin. Traffic was a pain in the ass. Me and my friends played "Name That Tune", and my pal Shawn "You know what would be really funny? If care could hump each other" Got back to my place on Tuesday.  
     
    So there's the lowdown.
  23. Gary Floyd
    No matter what you think of how the team has treated him (for fuck's sake, he says he's going to retire, changes his mind, and expects everyone in the team to accept him with open arms), or who he'll end up playing for, at the end of the day, he's a fucking whiny cunt, ant the sooner he's off of my TV, and the sooner I don't hve to hear about him anymore, the better.
     
     
     
    Fuck Brett Farve.
  24. Gary Floyd
    You know, I've been wanting to do "31 Days of the Dead" for a long time. Since December in fact. I've gone over all kinds of zombie flicks. From flesh eaters from Italy ("Burial Ground", "Hell of the Living Dead"), shot on camcorder shitfests ("Zombie Bloodbath"), Spanish Zombies ("Night of the Sorcerers", "Horror Rises From the Tomb"), obscure low budget oddities ("The Child", "Sugar Hill"), lost gems ("Sole Survivor"), Japanese zombies ("Junk"), bad Direct to DVD movies ("Dead Hate The Living", "Dead Heist"), pornographic zombie movies ("Erotic Nights of the Living Dead"), undead towns people ("Dead & Buried", "Messiah of Evil"), Certified classics ("The Living Dead at Manchester Morgue" "Carnival of Souls"), Hollywood Blockbusters ("Resident Evil: Extinction"), camp classics ("Night of the Comet", "Night of the Creeps"), lost gems ("Let's Scare Jessica To Death") and even frozen, remote controlled zombies with bad mustaches ("Frozen Scream"). So, what's the perfect way to end this month of zombie movies? Well, let's look at the first zombie movie ever made. That's right, the month ends with:
     

     
    31.) White Zombie (1932)
     
    Plot: A young man turns to a witch doctor to get a woman away from her fiance. Instead, she becomes one of the living dead.
     
    Review: There are many other zombie movies I could have gone with-"Fiend", "The Video Dead", "The Day it Came To Earth", and "Blood Diner" to name a few-but I think it's best to go with the first zombie movie ever made-and a nice little B & W horror flick to boot.
     
    Apart from being the first zombie movie, the movie is also worth seeing for Bela Lugosi's great performance as "Murder Legendre", the witch doctor. Along with "The Black Cat" and "Dracula", this is one of Lugosi's best performances. The dead are also quite creepy-not shambling rotting corpses (this is the 30's for Christ Sake), but they are zombie none the less-though the hair on one of them is rather goofy, like something out of a 3 Stooges movie.
     
    Granted, there are better Black and White Zombie movies ("Night of the Living Dead" and "I Walked With a Zombie"), but this is still a ice, atmospheric entry into the genre-and not hard to find, as it's in the public domain.
     
    Raring: 8/10 Creepy Black and White horror with notable significance.
     
    With that, "31 Days of the Dead" comes to a close. Will there be a part 2 next year? Maybe. Right now I'm not sure, as this has spent my energy and this has made the possibility of my other plan for August-"Month of the Maligned" null and void. Until then, I'm all zombied out. Still, I hope everyone who read this enjoyed it, and will give some of these a look.
  25. Gary Floyd
    30.) Night of the Comet (1984)

    Plot: After a Comet destroys much of the population, two valley girls must fend for their lives against the living dead.

    Review Remember when I said "One Dark Knight" was the most 80's movie to be reviewed here? I was wrong. That award goes to Thom ("Sole Survivor") Eberhardt's Sci-Fi Horror/Comedy cult classic "Night of the Comet", with its 80's soundtrack, dialogue, hair, clothes, etc.

    The movie itself really isn't a horror movie. Sure, there's zombies, but at the end of the day, this is more of a comedy if anything. That out of the way, the dead aren't treated like a joke, and thankfully avoid being reduced to pratfalls and bad slapstick humor. The dead are pretty smart themselves, as they can fire guns, talk, and much more. Well, a few can, such as Willy and his gang. Willy by the way, gets away with great one liners ("I'm not crazy. I just don't give a fuck!" "Let's play a game, it's called scary noises.") Shame he kicks the bucket-again.

    The movie is largely light hearted, and the cast have a ball with it, while fortunately not overselling or mugging for the camera. Also, there' a scene in a shopping mall, but unlike Romero, director Eberhardt is not interested in biting social commentary. He just wants to entertain you.

    "Night of the Comet" may lack the eerie atmosphere of Eberhardt's previous entry in zombie movies "Sole Survivor", but it makes up for it with campy fun.

    Rating: 8/10 "Daddy would have gotten us Uzis."

    Tomorow, the final movie is: You'll see.
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