Just finished watching it, really liked it but wasn't blown away.
What Ripper mentions about the violence being realistic and meaning something is 100% truth but I think that's where people began to overrate the film. Sure, they showed the consequences of violence and it was all legit and looked as such. But that's it. It ends there, except for the people who chose to believe that the violence was something beyond a plot device, which it wasn't.
Great performances all around though I'm not sure how William Hurt managed to garner an Oscar nod for barely 10 minutes of work. That's the type of shit I expect from Judi Dench. All of the supporting cast of Syriana and Munich did better work and had lengthier roles.
As for the sex scenes and the "gratutious" label, I'm torn. The cheerleader scene was well done and as Ripper pointed out it showcased the intimacy of the two. The stair scene was awkward and pretty out-of-the-blue but I think what Cronenberg was trying to get at was that even when things are stripped away there is still the animalistic side of humanity left over and that's what Tom and Edie's characters surrendered themseleves to at that particular moment.
Or they were horny.