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the.weej

And now, a bit of nostalgia.

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So I was wasting time in chat, and Rando made the offhand comment about how "the weirdest conversations happen in here," (no shit, eh?) and I was suddenly reminded of something. It's been a little over a year since perhaps the most memorable (and hilarious) moments in chat history. I said I'd repost it on Aug. 15th, commemorating the day it happened, but forgot.

 

Thankfully, Rando inadvertantly reminded me, and so here you are... the conversation in which Mike learned so much.

 

Not reccomended for reading at work, or reading if your sqeamish, or whatever. Please ignore the little numbers and symbol-y things--they're codes for the text colours, and it would take to long to edit them out.

 

Picked up just before the fun starts...

 

=====================================

 

15(119:43pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) that just reminds me how twisted my fantasies are

15(119:43pm15) (Mike15) When did that happen?

15(119:43pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) um, before I got here that's for sure

<Z> He's been here since I came.

<Z> And I need to talk to him, too.

15(119:43pm15) (14Join15) (14SuperDawg15) ([email protected]***15) (14#IGNWF15)

15(119:43pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) am I the only person that has vampiric fantasies?

15(119:43pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) or is that just me

<Z> Yes.

15(119:44pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) OH FUCK WHY IS JD HERE

<Z> You would be.

15(119:44pm15) (Mike15) Yes

15(119:44pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) just as I said that

15(119:44pm15) (Thoth15) Well... that was bad timing.

15(119:44pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) fuck

15(119:44pm15) (SuperDawg15) Now that's a greeting!

15(119:44pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) yeah it was

15(119:44pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) huh

<Z> Hint: Always type faster.

15(119:44pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) well a hearty 'fuck you guys I'm normal' to you too

15(119:44pm15) (Mike15) No you're not

15(119:44pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) Mike, I'm an 11

15(119:44pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I win

15(119:44pm15) (9Action15) 9* Mike ... the bastion of originality

15(119:45pm15) (Mike15) Shut up

15(119:45pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) (Y)

15(119:45pm15) (Mike15) You're making me even more depressed

15(119:45pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) don't make me give you a penis suplex

15(119:45pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) oh shit

15(119:45pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) why.... why did I say that....

15(119:45pm15) (SuperDawg15) Penis suplex = teh roq

15(119:45pm15) (Mike15) lol

<Z> Poor Annie.

15(119:45pm15) (Thoth15) You can't win today, Annie.

15(119:45pm15) (SuperDawg15) Annie

15(119:45pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) you know, half this shit I do to myself

15(119:45pm15) (SuperDawg15) Give me a penis suplex

15(119:45pm15) (9Action15) 9* Annie_Eclectic shakes head and sighs

15(119:45pm15) (9Action15) 9* Mike just laughed so hard he woke up his parents

15(119:45pm15) (SuperDawg15) shaking my head, eh?

<Z> 0,14>14,1<1,0>15,0<15NoirAmp 0,1>15,0< 15 Oingo Boingo - Weird Science 0,1>15,0< 15 3.45MB/3m45s 0,1>15,0< 15 Played 4 Times

15(119:46pm15) (9Action15) 9* Annie_Eclectic stabs her dagger down straight into the vans deferens of JD, splitting the member into two

halves, causing blood to gush forth from the wound

15(119:46pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) ...I'm damn normal

15(119:46pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) (Y)

15(119:46pm15) (SuperDawg15) tsk tsk Annie

* Z winces.

15(119:46pm15) (9Action15) 9* Mike thinks Annie is much higher than an 11

15(119:47pm15) (9Action15) 9* SuperDawg pulls back dildo spot

15(119:47pm15) (CIA15) You were thinking of JD's penis, Annie. That's not normal.

<Z> Bahaha!

15(119:47pm15) (SuperDawg15) Ever see a chick tap out by having a dildo jammed up her ass?

15(119:47pm15) (Silent15) Ah. I'm back. Half a meatball sub and some salt and vinegar chips = (Y)

15(119:47pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) CIA

15(119:47pm15) (SuperDawg15) You will tomorrow

15(119:47pm15) (Bo15) Sup JD

15(119:47pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) that was awful

<Z> Just threaten JD with a uethral swab, Annie. That'll shut him up.

15(119:47pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) urethral swab?

15(119:47pm15) (CIA15) EWWW, Z!

15(119:47pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I'm sure I can do that, painfully

<Z> Don't correct my spelling.

<Z> Ever.

15(119:48pm15) (SuperDawg15) Oh dear shit that is mean

15(119:48pm15) (Mike15) What's a urethr... OH MY GOD

15(119:48pm15) (Mike15) You sick sick motherfucker

15(119:48pm15) (SuperDawg15) Howdy sir Bo

15(119:48pm15) (9Action15) 9* Annie_Eclectic goes to look up the proceedure

<Z> It's sticking a q-tip quite a ways down your dick, Mike.

15(119:48pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) threaten me with a dildo spot will you, well I got someone to hold your ass down for the URETHRAL

SWAB OF DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMM

15(119:48pm15) (9Action15) 9* Mike wants to leave

<Z> It's what happens when you get tested for LSD.

15(119:48pm15) (9Action15) 9* Mike whimpers

15(119:49pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) that's the test for LSD?

15(119:49pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) wow

15(119:49pm15) (Silent15) Hey, Strangler. Send me TLC2, would you?

<Z> One of em.

15(119:49pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) how do you test women?

15(119:49pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) do I even want to know?

<Z> Considerably less painfully.

15(119:49pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) AWESOME!

15(119:49pm15) (Silent15) 0,1(4 IGNWFAmp 0) (4 Front Line Assembly - Retribution (Front 242 remix) 0) (4 7.1MB 0) (4 5m8s 0) (4 192Kbps 0) (4 Played:

4 0)

15(119:49pm15) (9Action15) 9* Annie_Eclectic does a Nelson-like 'ha ha'

15(119:49pm15) (SuperDawg15) Yeah

15(119:49pm15) (Thoth15) Actually...

<Z> Well, I can still pass around the multi-gender threat of 'I'll give you a sigmoid oscopy!'

15(119:50pm15) (9Action15) 9* Silent thanks his lucky stars he never got caught tripping. Oh. My. Gawd. ::winces in pain::

15(119:50pm15) (SuperDawg15) I'm sure Annie likes a q-tip in her clit

15(119:50pm15) (Thoth15) If you're put a q-tip up a girl's urethra...

15(119:50pm15) (Thoth15) That would hurt,

15(119:50pm15) (Thoth15) A lot.

15(119:50pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) well true

15(119:50pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) but that's not the test

15(119:50pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) to ha!

15(119:50pm15) (Mike15) ...girls have urethras?

15(119:50pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) um...

15(119:50pm15) (Thoth15) Mike... umm...

15(119:50pm15) (Mike15) Damn, this is better than sex ed class

15(119:50pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I would hope so

15(119:50pm15) (Bo15) Can't be prejiduce, cause I sell to much white for that

15(119:50pm15) (Thoth15) I don't...

15(119:50pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I mean, we -do- urinate and all

15(119:50pm15) (Thoth15) Mike... um...

15(119:50pm15) (Mike15) They never taught me that

15(119:50pm15) (Silent15) Mike. You. Are a moron.

* Z dies... DIES laughing.

<Z> DIES

15(119:52pm15) (SuperDawg15) Friar Funk: THUMP! Don't forget beating me, if Wilson beats me first.

15(119:52pm15) (SuperDawg15) JayDawg6669: ah yes... I can take Wilson while typing with my penis

15(119:52pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) you know Mike

15(119:53pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) Women have these parts called 'hoods'

15(119:53pm15) (SuperDawg15) hoods?

15(119:53pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) they're quite interesting

15(119:53pm15) (Mike15) Ah

15(119:53pm15) (Mike15) The g thing, right?

15(119:53pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) ...?

* Z continues dying.

<Z> STOP!

<Z> PLEASE STOP!

15(119:53pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) g-thing?

15(119:53pm15) (Mike15) Yeah

15(119:53pm15) (Thoth15) He means the g-spot.

<Z> You're killing me!

15(119:53pm15) (Thoth15) That's something else altogehter.

15(119:53pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I was thinking that too

15(119:53pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) yeah

15(119:53pm15) (Mike15) Thoth knows what I'm talking about

15(119:53pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) completely different

15(119:53pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) although learn the g-spot

15(119:53pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) learn it well

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) anyway

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) the hood

15(119:54pm15) (Mike15) How can I?

<Z> You might need to give Mike a map each time, Annie.

15(119:54pm15) (Mike15) You just told me what i thought it was was wrong

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) well, in sex ed

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) ask about it

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) learn it

15(119:54pm15) (SuperDawg15) Can I practise on you Annie?

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) become.... the g-spot

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) but anyway

15(119:54pm15) (Mike15) Ew

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) the hood

15(119:54pm15) (Mike15) Why?

15(119:54pm15) (9Action15) 9* SuperDawg doesn't need practise... this is just a pick up

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) it's 'practice' JD and hush

15(119:54pm15) (Silent15) 0,1(4 IGNWFAmp 0) (4 Goldfinger - Carry On 0) (4 3.06MB 0) (4 3m20s 0) (4 128Kbps 0) (4 Played: 2 0)

15(119:54pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I'm teaching about hoods

15(119:55pm15) (Mike15) Ooooh

15(119:55pm15) (SuperDawg15) Ok

15(119:55pm15) (Mike15) Like hoodlums?

15(119:55pm15) (SuperDawg15) Lol

15(119:55pm15) (Thoth15) HAHAHAHHAA

15(119:55pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) you see women have this fun little nub of flesh that's tightly tightly packed with fun nerve endings

15(119:55pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) it's called the clitoris

15(119:55pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) or 'clit

15(119:55pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) '

15(119:55pm15) (Mike15) Ah

15(119:55pm15) (Mike15) Can you use that in a sentence?

15(119:55pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) sure

15(119:55pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) "I have a motherfucking clit"

15(119:55pm15) (SuperDawg15) LOL

15(119:55pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) now

15(119:56pm15) (Silent15) "JD punched Annie in the clit and won the match.:

15(119:56pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) when stimulated, this is quite fun for the woman

15(119:56pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) but

15(119:56pm15) (Silent15) Like that, see?

15(119:56pm15) (Mike15) Wait wait wait

15(119:56pm15) (Mike15) Isn't that the g-spot?

15(119:56pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) no

15(119:56pm15) (SuperDawg15) No

15(119:56pm15) (Thoth15) ...no.

15(119:56pm15) (9Action15) 9* Mike kills Redbook

15(119:56pm15) (Thoth15) Clit and g-spot are 2 different things.

15(119:56pm15) (SuperDawg15) The G-Spot is inside

15(119:56pm15) (Mike15) They lied to me

* Z dies laughing. Again.

15(119:56pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) inside the vagina

<Z> I'm a cruel to be laughing at Mike right now?

15(119:56pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) somewhere, different for every woman

15(119:56pm15) (CIA15) Man. People honestly don't KNOW this stuff?

<Z> *Am I

15(119:57pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) okay

15(119:57pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) so the clit

15(119:57pm15) (Silent15) Seems that way, Drew.

15(119:57pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) is sensitive

15(119:57pm15) (SuperDawg15) like the skin seperates the Spotter and the clitter

15(119:57pm15) (CIA15) Seriously. It's just basic anatomy. Read a fucking book.

15(119:57pm15) (Thoth15) It's on the roof or the sides of the vagina.

15(119:57pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) if you bite it, you will get killed

15(119:57pm15) (Thoth15) The funny thing is, each woman's is different.

15(119:57pm15) (Mike15) How could you bite it?

15(119:57pm15) (9Action15) 9* CIA hangs head in hame.

15(119:57pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I've accidentally done that

15(119:57pm15) (Thoth15) Sigh...

15(119:57pm15) (CIA15) *shame.

15(119:57pm15) (9Action15) 9* Silent can't.....stop....laughing.....

15(119:57pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) lick, lick, jaw cramp, bite

15(119:57pm15) (Silent15) Please...stop...

15(119:57pm15) (Thoth15) You can bite it, Mike.

15(119:57pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) it's not fun

15(119:57pm15) (Thoth15) It can be done.

<Z> Stop!

15(119:57pm15) (Mike15) But... why would you?

<Z> Please... stop...

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) well, you dont want to

15(119:58pm15) (Mike15) Annie (a woman, I assume) told me not to

15(119:58pm15) (Thoth15) Be aware of jaw cramps. Doing oral on a girl can put your head at an unnatural angle.

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) but it happens sometimes

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) yes

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) what Thoth said

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I got a jaw cramp

15(119:58pm15) (Silent15) 0,1(4 IGNWFAmp 0) (4 Goldfinger - Counting The Days 0) (4 3.18MB 0) (4 3m28s 0) (4 128Kbps 0) (4 Played: 1 0)

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) my mouth automatically shut

15(119:58pm15) (SuperDawg15) Thoth reads his porn

15(119:58pm15) (Thoth15) I advise to do oral on a staircase.

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) biting what was in my mought

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) *mouth

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) i.e. the clit

15(119:58pm15) (Thoth15) My god... what the hell is wrong with us?

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) now

15(119:58pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) GODDAMNIT THE HOOD

15(119:59pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) the hood is a flap of flesh that naturally covers the clit

15(119:59pm15) (CIA15) That's actually fairly common advice, Thoth. I read that in a book some time back. Very good for positioning.

15(119:59pm15) (SuperDawg15) LOL

<Z> We're having the most hilarious discussion EVER, Thoth. It's frighteneing.

15(119:59pm15) (Mike15) With nerve endings, right Annie?

15(119:59pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) if a woman is aroused, it tends to (but not always) stretch back, exposing a hard aroused clit

15(119:59pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) the hood has nerve endings, but no more than any other part

15(119:59pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) dont bite the hood either

15(119:59pm15) (Mike15) What do you do if you want to pleasure her but it doesn't stretch back?

15(1110:00pm15) (CIA15) And now I resist the urge to use descriptions I have heard before as they would fuck the whole conversation up.

More.

15(1110:00pm15) (SuperDawg15) Annie... the sex ed teacher

15(1110:00pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) you can manually do it

15(1110:00pm15) (Thoth15) Well, you get hands-on, Mike.

15(1110:00pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) it's small

15(1110:00pm15) (Mike15) But wouldn't that hurt?

15(1110:00pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) no

15(1110:00pm15) (9Action15) 9* CIA hangs head in shame once more.

15(1110:00pm15) (SuperDawg15) Annie is quite small anyway

15(1110:00pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) it's stretchy

15(1110:00pm15) (Mike15) And what if I accidently, uh, ripped it off or something?

15(1110:00pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) holy shit

15(1110:00pm15) (9Action15) 9* Annie_Eclectic cringes and sells

15(1110:00pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) oh my god

15(1110:00pm15) (8Quit15) (8Thoth15) ([email protected]) (8QUIT: Snak 4.8.3 Unregistered copy.

Evaluation period is over. Program will now quit. Thanks for using Snak.15)

15(1110:00pm15) (CIA15) Oh, god!

<Z> After I stop laughing, I'll tell you that you'd be dead, Mike.

15(1110:00pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) never.... EVER think that

15(1110:01pm15) (14Join15) (14Thoth15) ([email protected]) (14#IGNWF15)

<Z> DEAD

15(1110:01pm15) (9Action15) 9* Annie_Eclectic cries

15(1110:01pm15) (Mike15) ...why not?

15(1110:01pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) okay

15(1110:01pm15) (Thoth15) ...NO

15(1110:01pm15) (Thoth15) NO NO NO

15(1110:01pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) first, to be honest

15(1110:01pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) you'd have to kinda seriously try to

15(1110:01pm15) (CIA15) If you're using SKIN TEARING FORCE on the vagina or any of the surrounding areas, Mike, you're a dumbass.

Period.

15(1110:01pm15) (14Join15) (14MrGalatea15) ([email protected]***.gtn.net15) (14#IGNWF15)

15(1110:01pm15) (12Op15) (12ChanServ15) ([email protected]) (12MrGalatea15)

15(1110:01pm15) (Thoth15) G's here. He can help.

15(1110:01pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) do not, rip off the hood surrounding the clit

15(1110:01pm15) (@MrGalatea15) With?

15(1110:01pm15) (SuperDawg15) Yeah

15(1110:01pm15) (Thoth15) G, we're teaching Mike about sex ed.

15(1110:01pm15) (SuperDawg15) G the clit master

15(1110:01pm15) (@MrGalatea15) Whoa...

15(1110:01pm15) (SuperDawg15) Clit Commander*

15(1110:01pm15) (Mike15) Okay

15(1110:01pm15) (Mike15) Keep going

15(1110:01pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) you can simply press it back

15(1110:02pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) it's not hard and wont hurt

<Z> It's sad, really. This conversation never would've happened if I hadn't brough up the words 'Urethral Swab'.

15(1110:02pm15) (@MrGalatea15) Annie just freaked the shit out of me...

15(1110:02pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) so when the hood's out of the way

15(1110:02pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) you can go to work, so to speak

15(1110:02pm15) (Mike15) How do I go to work?

15(1110:02pm15) (Thoth15) Actually, I dared Annie to try to make Mike faint or something.

15(1110:02pm15) (Thoth15) JEUSS

15(1110:02pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) oh wow

15(1110:02pm15) (Thoth15) JESUS

15(1110:02pm15) (Thoth15) COME ON

15(1110:02pm15) (SuperDawg15) The dirty lesbian pervert is educating the young boys

15(1110:02pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) Mike, what would you want done to the head of your penis?

15(1110:02pm15) (Mike15) Uh...

15(1110:02pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) because essentially, that's what the clit is to the woman

15(1110:02pm15) (Mike15) Can I say it?

<Z> Mike, you CAN'T be this stupid.

15(1110:03pm15) (CIA15) Yes, Mike, say it.

15(1110:03pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) go ahead

<Z> I mean, REALLY.

15(1110:03pm15) (Mike15) Uh, damn, there's a lot, really...

15(1110:03pm15) (Silent15) 0,1(4 IGNWFAmp 0) (4 Goldfinger - Miles Away 0) (4 1.75MB 0) (4 1m54s 0) (4 128Kbps 0) (4 Played: 1 0)

15(1110:03pm15) (Mike15) Licked, caressed... you know, that stuff

15(1110:03pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) think of something that would work for men and women

15(1110:03pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) yeah

15(1110:03pm15) (Silent15) Please make it stop....!

15(1110:03pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) lick it, or softly rub it

15(1110:03pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) never, ever pinch

15(1110:03pm15) (Mike15) Yeah

15(1110:03pm15) (@MrGalatea15) Put it in a meat grinder...

15(1110:03pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) pinching deserves a punch in the nuts

15(1110:03pm15) (Mike15) Cuz that hurts, right?

15(1110:03pm15) (SuperDawg15) You can pinch my head, Annie

15(1110:03pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) yeah

15(1110:04pm15) (9Action15) 9* Mike is a fast learner

15(1110:04pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) the clit is about 2-3 times more sensitive than the head

15(1110:04pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) it can give a woman orgasms

15(1110:04pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) note -can- not -will-

15(1110:04pm15) (CIA15) Is that the circumsized, or uncircumsized ,ale penis head, Annie?

15(1110:04pm15) (Mike15) Wait... but aren't orgasms caused by what is essentially pain?

15(1110:04pm15) (CIA15) *male

15(1110:04pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) CIA: I honestly wouldn't know

15(1110:04pm15) (CIA15) Okay, just wondering where you got your stats from.

15(1110:04pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) essentially pain?

15(1110:05pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) well, I personally like pain and pleasure mixed

15(1110:05pm15) (SuperDawg15) Annie needs to be circumcized

15(1110:05pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) but that's pretty much a woman-to-woman thing

15(1110:05pm15) (Mike15) Okay

15(1110:05pm15) (Mike15) Anyway, keep going

15(1110:05pm15) (CIA15) Stimulation, Mike. That would be the proper word. And if you want to try something painful, ask, or DON'T.

15(1110:06pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) yeah, so lick, suck if it's big enough for you to

15(1110:06pm15) (Mike15) The hood?

15(1110:06pm15) (Thoth15) No offense to Annie, but Mike, pain isnt necessary a common thing that women like. Be careful with that.

15(1110:06pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) no the clit

15(1110:06pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) yeah

15(1110:06pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I'm a rare case

15(1110:06pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) pain usually = (N)

15(1110:06pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) and even with me I'm not big into it

15(1110:07pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) just the usual spanking and being tied up

15(1110:07pm15) (SuperDawg15) I like pain

<Z> I used to know a girl who was a masochist.

15(1110:07pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) of course you do

15(1110:07pm15) (Thoth15) Annie likes indian burns during sex, I guess.

15(1110:07pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) indian burns?

15(1110:07pm15) (@MrGalatea15) I like to be repeatedly punched in the nuts...

15(1110:07pm15) (Thoth15) Yeah, Indian burns.

15(1110:07pm15) (@MrGalatea15) But I don't find that painful.

15(1110:07pm15) (Thoth15) So that's why they're called Galatea Specials.

15(1110:07pm15) (SuperDawg15) That's because you are hammered

15(1110:07pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) so yeah

15(1110:07pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) basically, you press the hood back gently

15(1110:07pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) then lick/suck the clit

15(1110:08pm15) (SuperDawg15) Annie

15(1110:08pm15) (SuperDawg15) I got hit on by a gay guy last night

15(1110:08pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) and soon, you too will be having ORAL SEX

15(1110:08pm15) (Mike15) How?

15(1110:08pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) this has been a public service

<Z> (weakly) Are we done now?

15(1110:08pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) wait... whaddya mean how?

15(1110:08pm15) (Mike15) I mean, do I actually eat it, or...?

15(1110:08pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) !!!

15(1110:09pm15) (SuperDawg15) !!!

15(1110:09pm15) (SuperDawg15) Somebody quote that!

15(1110:09pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) WE LOST Z!!! GET THE DEFRIBULATOR

15(1110:09pm15) (HVT_away15) oral sex rocks!!!

15(1110:09pm15) (HVT_away15) i love to get head

15(1110:09pm15) (HVT_away15) head is awsome!

15(1110:09pm15) (HVT_away15) and away i go

15(1110:09pm15) (CIA15) I'll bet, Thugg.

15(1110:09pm15) (Silent15) Yeah, Mike, chew it up and fuckin' swallow it.....heh heh....heh heh heh.....AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HOW! OH LORD JESUS! HOW! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

15(1110:10pm15) (Thoth15) My god.

15(1110:10pm15) (Thoth15) Mike.

15(1110:10pm15) (Thoth15) DUMBASS.

15(1110:10pm15) (9Action15) 9* Silent collapses on his keyboard laughing.

* Z dies.

<Z> I mean... my god... it's just...

<Z> I'm DEAD.

<Z> I'm sorry, Mike, you've KILLED ME.

15(1110:11pm15) (Silent15) 0,1(4 IGNWFAmp 0) (4 Jawbreaker - Chesterfield King 0) (4 3.58MB 0) (4 3m53s 0) (4 128Kbps 0) (4 Played: 5 0)

<Z> Oh, and I told that to Tod.

15(1110:11pm15) (CIA15) He HAS to be faking this dumb act.

15(1110:11pm15) (Mike15) I'm not

<Z> He's slapping you behind the head RIGHT NOW.

15(1110:11pm15) (Mike15) I've seriously been wondering that for a while

15(1110:11pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I've lsot it

15(1110:11pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I can't see the screen from the tears

<Z> Anyway, if you ARE done, Annie..

<Z> Tod wants to talk to you, so get on AIM, if you will.

15(1110:11pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) Mike

15(1110:11pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) 'eating out' is a slang term

15(1110:12pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) just likc for Christ's sake

15(1110:12pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) *lick

15(1110:12pm15) (Mike15) It's misleading

15(1110:12pm15) (Mike15) For Christ's sake isn't slang

15(1110:12pm15) (Mike15) kidding, kidding, i get it

15(1110:12pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) heh

15(1110:12pm15) (Mike15) You lick the inside of the vagina, right?

15(1110:12pm15) (Thoth15) Close enough.

15(1110:13pm15) (Thoth15) I guess.

15(1110:13pm15) (Mike15) But is it right

15(1110:13pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) you can, and the clit

15(1110:13pm15) (SuperDawg15) ...

15(1110:13pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) licking pretty much everwhere inside the labia is acceptable

15(1110:13pm15) (@MrGalatea15) Best chat ever.

15(1110:13pm15) (Thoth15) I logged all this, btw.

<Z> I'm going to log all of this.

<Z> Holy god.

15(1110:13pm15) (Thoth15) I think we're done.

15(1110:13pm15) (Thoth15) Later all.

15(1110:13pm15) (8Quit15) (8Thoth15) ([email protected]) (8QUIT: Kono mama de wa owaranzou!15)

15(1110:14pm15) (SuperDawg15) Been enjoyable

15(1110:14pm15) (Mike15) So, let's see if I'm right

15(1110:14pm15) (Mike15) To pleasure a woman, you get her aroused, right?

15(1110:14pm15) (Mike15) And then the hood pulls back, and if it doesn't you gently press it back

15(1110:14pm15) (Mike15) And then you lick/suck it

15(1110:14pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) yes

15(1110:14pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) (Y)

15(1110:15pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) you're ahead of every straight male in your class now

15(1110:15pm15) (@MrGalatea15) You forgot the part about putting on Barry White music.

15(1110:15pm15) (9Action15) 9* Mike is a fast learner

15(1110:15pm15) (SuperDawg15) LoL

15(1110:15pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) Z: send me the log

15(1110:15pm15) (CIA15) Except the ones who know how to read anatomy books.

15(1110:15pm15) (SuperDawg15) I thought it was Barry Manilow

<Z> You only killed half of us getting there, Mike.

<Z> Be proud.

15(1110:15pm15) (SuperDawg15) No wait... that's Tom Green's character in Road Trip

15(1110:15pm15) (@MrGalatea15) Barry Manilow is hella gay. Barry White 0wnz him.

15(1110:15pm15) (Mike15) I dunno

15(1110:16pm15) (SuperDawg15) lol @ Metalhead G liking Barry White

15(1110:16pm15) (Mike15) I'm just wondering how this all stemmed from something as horrid as a urethral swab

<Z> I'm wondering, too.

<Z> Well, it succeded in what it was supposed to do in shutting up JD. I think.

15(1110:16pm15) (Mike15) Z: Send me the log

15(1110:17pm15) (Mike15) I may need it when I get some action

15(1110:17pm15) (Mike15) When I'm 30

<Z> I will when I'm ready to go, yo.

<Z> Halleluiah!

<Z> My downloads FINISHED!

15(1110:17pm15) (Mike15) Wait... WHAT?

<Z> And it only took TWO DAYS!

15(1110:18pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) Z SEND THE LOG TO ANNIE

15(1110:18pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) [email protected]

15(1110:18pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) (Y)

15(1110:18pm15) (Mike15) CIA thought I was faking... rrrg

<Z> I will. When I actually LOG THIS.

<Z> Oi.

<Z> You know you can log this yourself.

15(1110:18pm15) (CIA15) Sorry, Mike, it's just.... by the time I was 14, I knew WAY more than that. Hell, since then, I've learned as much

over again. THat stuff is BASIC to me.

15(1110:18pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I dont know how to in XChat

15(1110:19pm15) (Mike15) I'm not fourteen

15(1110:19pm15) (CIA15) I know. I'm saying I learned at a young age.

<Z> XChat? I see.... you aren't using the script, then.

15(1110:19pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I can't

15(1110:19pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I

15(1110:19pm15) (Mike15) Nor do I go around asking anybody how to eat out

15(1110:19pm15) (Mike15) Or pleasure

15(1110:19pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I'm in linux

<Z> I learned all of this when I was younger than CIA. So go me.

<Z> Right, right, okay.

15(1110:19pm15) (Mike15) btw, where's the log button?

15(1110:19pm15) (@MrGalatea15) I've been munching rugs since I was 4.

<Z> You see that icon next to the file button?

<Z> Click it.

15(1110:20pm15) (CIA15) Oh, really, Z? THen what's the simple thing you can do to help stimulate a woman's G-spot during sex?

<Z> Select logging.

15(1110:20pm15) (14Join15) (14Thoth15) ([email protected]) (14#IGNWF15)

15(1110:20pm15) (CIA15) And what position gives the woman the most control over her orgasm?

15(1110:20pm15) (Thoth15) So is it over?

15(1110:20pm15) (Thoth15) My god, it isn't.

15(1110:20pm15) (Mike15) I'm interested in that

15(1110:20pm15) (@MrGalatea15) And do you think it's a coincidence that it's called the G spot?

15(1110:20pm15) (@MrGalatea15) Fuckin' a.

15(1110:20pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) I'm so out of this one

<Z> ...shut up, Drew. I meant what we explained to MIKE.

15(1110:20pm15) (SuperDawg15) Damn G and his cousins

15(1110:21pm15) (CIA15) Yeah, but I'm just saying. I know EVERYTHING. Insofar as I know a lot.

15(1110:21pm15) (Mike15) Blather

15(1110:21pm15) (CIA15) You woul dnot believe the amount of study I have done on this subject.

15(1110:21pm15) (Mike15) I know how to stimulate the clitoris

15(1110:21pm15) (Mike15) So booyah

15(1110:21pm15) (9Action15) 9* Silent had quite an instructive girlfriend once. His sex ed is, ah, done.

15(1110:21pm15) (Thoth15) Because we TOLD YOU.

<Z> Bah, hush. You're, what, twentysomething?

15(1110:21pm15) (9Action15) 9* CIA gives Silent a high five?

15(1110:21pm15) (CIA15) Twenty, Z.

15(1110:21pm15) (Silent15) Oh, lord, can we get that Mike quote?

15(1110:21pm15) (Silent15) "so booyah"

15(1110:22pm15) (Silent15) Priceless.

15(1110:22pm15) (Mike15) What the hell?

15(1110:22pm15) (CIA15) 15(1112:20am15) (Mike15) I know how to stimulate the clitoris

15(1110:22pm15) (CIA15) 15(1112:20am15) (Mike15) So booyah

15(1110:22pm15) (Mike15) My lack of knowledge isn't that funny

15(1110:22pm15) (CIA15) That one?

15(1110:22pm15) (Silent15) Yes, that's the one.

15(1110:22pm15) (Silent15) Can we put that somewhere?

15(1110:22pm15) (CIA15) Sure. Where do you want to put it?

<Z> Like where?

15(1110:22pm15) (Mike15) Get G to make it the topic

15(1110:22pm15) (SuperDawg15) Pffft

15(1110:22pm15) (@MrGalatea15) I disagree, Mike. I find it VERY funny.

15(1110:23pm15) (Silent15) On the boards, somewhere. Maybe in everybody's sig?

15(1110:23pm15) (@MrGalatea15) Only Crusen can.

15(1110:23pm15) (SuperDawg15) You can always let Sex teach you something

15(1110:23pm15) (Silent15) And I must concur with G.

<Z> You know, then maybe I should log this and give it all to Crusen when he shows up, so he knows exaclty why this is so

funny, and he'll make that quote the topic.

<Z> You may have sealed your own fate, Van Siclen.

15(1110:24pm15) (@MrGalatea15) It would be much funnier if he was in his 20s.

15(1110:24pm15) (Mike15) Pfft... I learned more in the last hour than from nine weeks of Vagina Jeopardy

15(1110:24pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) wow

15(1110:24pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) wow

15(1110:24pm15) (Annie_Eclectic15) now -that- needs to be quoted

15(1110:25pm15) (SuperDawg15) Vagina Jeopardy1!!?

15(1110:25pm15) (SuperDawg15) LOL

15(1110:25pm15) (CIA15) WHAT?

15(1110:25pm15) (CIA15) THAT'S goin in the sig!

15(1110:25pm15) (Thoth15) ...

15(1110:25pm15) (Thoth15) WHAT?

15(1110:25pm15) (Thoth15) WHAT?

15(1110:25pm15) (Mike15) Yes, our school's welfare attempt to teach us about sex... I kid you not

15(1110:25pm15) (@MrGalatea15) ...

<Z> Note to self: Don't get an education in New Hampshire.

15(1110:26pm15) (Thoth15) Oh my god...

15(1110:26pm15) (CIA15) THat is now IN MY SIG.

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It's been a little over a year since perhaps the most memorable (and hilarious) moments in chat history. I said I'd repost it on Aug. 15th, commemorating the day it happened, but forgot.

 

Thankfully, Rando inadvertantly reminded me, and so here you are... the conversation in which Mike learned so much.

And it's a year later. This time, Mike mentioned bukkake...

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Guest Insanityman

Zed, and sorry Thoth, but you HAVE to post the penis one. My custom title is "Wait what?" from Thoth's orignal reaction. "It's an oozing cockhead!" is perhaps the only times I've fallen out of my chair in laughter.

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Zed, and sorry Thoth, but you HAVE to post the penis one. My custom title is "Wait what?" from Thoth's orignal reaction. "It's an oozing cockhead!" is perhaps the only times I've fallen out of my chair in laughter.

I remember spotting that (well it took up my entire fucking screen), and remember the horrified look on my face. Then, I remember the horrified look on the faces of CIA, and then Zed, and then all of chat as they discovered the horror.

 

...It was terrible.

 

On another note, I wouldn't let MVS forget about learning so much for months.

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