Enigma 0 Report post Posted March 29, 2004 from WWE.Com RAW EXCLUSIVE: KANE HEADED TO ATHENS FOR 2004 SUMMER OLYMPICS "Amateur wrestling, as any mat expert will tell you, is about as different from the professional game as night is from day. It requires very different skills, and very rarely has an athlete been able to translate success on the amateur mat into success in the ring. No one has ever done it in reverse. Yet, Raw Magazine has learned that this summer, none other than the rampaging madman Kane plans on doing just that. That's because the former WWE Champion now has his sights set on Olympic gold." Ok...what the hell is going on? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest El Satanico Report post Posted March 29, 2004 Early April Fools? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Garth 0 Report post Posted March 29, 2004 Its supposed to be an April fools type thing but only its 2 days early. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Choken One Report post Posted March 29, 2004 I was thinking...Well...he IS a strong fucker...maybe he's gonna do weightlifting...guess it's a early april fools joke...odd. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes Report post Posted March 29, 2004 This is....odd. That's all I can think of. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Garth 0 Report post Posted March 29, 2004 I think its in the latest Raw Magazine as well, God sometimes WWE are lame. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MarvinisaLunatic 0 Report post Posted March 29, 2004 hmm.. theres a joke here somewhere.. They could set Kane on fire for the Olympic flame.. not the one you were expecting? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AndrewTS 0 Report post Posted March 29, 2004 Maybe Underfedor was teaching him that there shoot-y stuff. It's Raw magazine--I don't think it means anything. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Man Of 1,004 Modes Report post Posted March 29, 2004 Indeed Raw Magazine is full of shit. I can't name 1 "profile article" that was truthful. Hell, they can't even remember shit like when So-and-so won Tag Titles and stuff. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steviekick 0 Report post Posted March 29, 2004 Maybe instead of passing the torch to start the Olympics, they'll just light Kane on fire and pass him around. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Papacita 0 Report post Posted March 29, 2004 So corpse fucking is an Olympic event now? Damn. Sign me up. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dangerous K89 0 Report post Posted March 29, 2004 Corpse fucking and Nose Honking have been added to this year's. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Fook Report post Posted March 29, 2004 Sorry, but I won't watch until Ball Shocking is added. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DerangedHermit 0 Report post Posted March 29, 2004 They forgot a word. Kane will be competing at the 2004 Special Olympics. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Askewniverse Report post Posted March 30, 2004 That's gotta be one of the most obvious jokes ever. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JoeDirt 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 I think we're discounting Kane's abilities a little too much here. The man can SHOOT LIGHTNING AT PEOPLE, not to mention make the ringposts at the arena burst in flames. The man can do anything he wants, people. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hank Kingsley 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 The last sentence in the magazine says something along the lines of "This April, only fools will doubt Kane's ability to win Olympic gold" or something similarly inane. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AndrewTS 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 I think we're discounting Kane's abilities a little too much here. The man can SHOOT LIGHTNING AT PEOPLE, not to mention make the ringposts at the arena burst in flames. The man can do anything he wants, people. Except have good matches with people aside from Benoit, Angle, Eddy, HBK, and when the planets are aligned proberly, Albert. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
2GOLD 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 They refer to him as Mr. Kane and say the Olympic committee will consider the chokeslam. Never before has there been a more obvious joke. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest I Got Banned for Sucking Report post Posted March 30, 2004 They refer to him as Mr. Kane and say the Olympic committee will consider the chokeslam. Never before has there been a more obvious joke. Obviously. Who knows? His gimmick doesn't exactly allow him to show what he could do. Don't discount him yet. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Dynamite Kido Report post Posted March 30, 2004 So corpse fucking is an Olympic event now? Not until 2008.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dubq 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 Does he even have an amateur background? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BX 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 Uh.. watching amateur necro flicks? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Spaceman Spiff 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 That's gotta be one of the most obvious jokes ever. Really. He's barely capable as a *pro* wrestler. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AndrewTS 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 Considering Kurt Angle said he would need an entire year to prepare for the Olympics, and if Kane has done any am wrestling it would have to be in high school or something, you have to be a pretty big dope to buy this. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jobber of the Week 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 I think this is just simply a gag by Vince to see if the net audience is so stupid that he could write something like this and everyone would buy it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jester 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 I don't think Kane will be able to compete in something where they test your urine before and after the event. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jericholic82 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 yea, I got the RAW mag in the mail yesterday (Monday). Also, I see that no one has mentioned this: If you look at that Kane article, the first letter of every paragraph is in bold, read all the letters to spell "April Fools" I knew it was a joke as soon as I saw bolded letters in every paragraph, obvious. Then again they still switch between kayfabe and semi-shooting in their mags anyway. This reminds me of 99, when a wrestling website, had a gag for April Fools about Steve Austin signing with WCW. The first letters spelled out April Fools there too. and can you believe that the cover price for RAW mag has gone up to $5.99 US wtf? I remember when WWF magazine cost 2.50 sheesh. Good thing I subscribed to both RAW and SD this year for 19.95 each (well I have been subscribing to wwf/wwe/sd magazine since the February 1992 issue with Ric Flair on the cover-alas sadly my mags from 92-94 were ruined in storage by a flood, also had some early 90s wcw mags and some pwis and inside wrestlings in good shape) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BX 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 and can you believe that the cover price for RAW mag has gone up to $5.99 US wtf? I remember when WWF magazine cost 2.50 sheesh. Good thing I subscribed to both RAW and SD this year for 19.95 each (well I have been subscribing to wwf/wwe/sd magazine since the February 1992 issue with Ric Flair on the cover-alas sadly my mags from 92-94 were ruined in storage by a flood, also had some early 90s wcw mags and some pwis and inside wrestlings in good shape) Are you trying to sell something? If so, meet me in that dark alleyway by the Kenny Roger's Roasters. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jericholic82 0 Report post Posted March 30, 2004 no I am not selling, I was lamenting all the mags I had that were destroyed by a flood. and the ones I have, no way they're goign to have to pry them and my tape collection out of my hands when I die. "I'm pretty sure I am talking to the water heater behind the burnt-out Shoney's" -"Neil Diamond"Will Ferrel to the the rock as "Bigfoot" on snl April 2002 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
