Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 They work for me and don't stretch anything. The problem seems to be your computer and its resolution settings. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest FrigidSoul Report post Posted June 23, 2004 They work for you because they're in your cache. However I'm willing to bet they're broken links for alot of other people. I also can't have the resolution so everything is so small to avoid stretching. I can't read the stuff at that level. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dr. Tom 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Future parts definitely need more Emperor Palpatom. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Eh, I changed my sig anyway after finding something better. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EL DANDY~! 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Me no happy with the fact that I get NO LOVE in this. THE FUCK. That is all. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest cobainwasmurdered Report post Posted June 23, 2004 El Dandy is a Stormtrooper. Everyone we don't out and out mention is a Stormtrooper. You get to be in shiny white armour. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 INT. WDI - WAR ROOM BRIEFING FORUM Sassonna stands before a large electronic wall display. Welsh and several other senators are to one side of the giant readout. The low-ceilinged forum is filled with posters, lurkers, and a sprinkling of R2-type robots. Everyone is listening intently to what Sassonna is saying. Bank and Soulbacca are standing near the back. SASSONNA The super moderator is heavily shielded and carries a flaming ability greater than half the member index. Its defenses are designed around a direct accusation of homosexuality or illicit affairs. A small one-poster flame should be able to penetrate the outer defense. Dandy Leader, a rough looking man in his early thirties, stands and addresses Sassonna. DANDY LEADER Pardon me for asking, sir, but what good are snub flames going to be against that? SASSONNA Well, the TSMpire doesn't consider a small one-man flame to be any threat, or they'd have a tighter defense. An analysis of the plans provided by Princess Welsh has demonstrated a weakness in the super moderator. R2-ALF2 stands next to a similar robot, makes beeping sounds, extends a strange phallic knob towards it, and turns his head from right to left. SASSONNA The approach will not be easy. You are required to maneuver straight through this search field and skim the results to this point. The target area is only two posts wide. It's a small verbal gaffe about loving Dance Dance Revolution, right below a post declaring its affinity for Acid Bath. A precise flame will start a chain reaction which should destroy the super moderator's credibility and totally annhilate it. A murmur of disbelief runs through the room. SASSONNA Only a precise hit will set up a chain reaction. The post can be edited, so you'll have to use proton quotations. Dave is sitting next to Spiff Antilles, a hotshot pilot about sixteen years old. SPIFF That's impossible, even for a computer. DAVE It's not impossible. I used to bullseye tools in Current Events folders on Sanktooine, back home. Their mistakes aren't more than two posts long. SASSONNA Man your logins! And may the Whorce be with you! The group rises and begins to leave. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hoff 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Wait, no, I want to be in it, please, put me in the...in the story. Whine, cry. "Some people are stupid." -- one of the great philosophers of our time Anyway, good work so far kids, what I skimmed anyway. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 You're in it. Not until Episode VI, but you're in it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest cobainwasmurdered Report post Posted June 23, 2004 or are you?!? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caboose 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 I demand an individual role thats not a storm trooper. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Yours is coming up shortly, don't worry. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caboose 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 WILL: You'll have to sell your screen name. DAVE: That's okay. I'm never coming back to this board again. WILL (under his breath): Suuuuuuuure... May I say, GOLD. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caboose 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Yours is coming up shortly, don't worry. Crosses fingers to be 'Wedge'. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Spaceman Spiff 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Yours is coming up shortly, don't worry. Crosses fingers to be 'Wedge'. Already assigned: Dave is sitting next to Spiff Antilles, a hotshot pilot about sixteen years old. And I think Sass would have been better suited to be Chewbacca, since they're both pretty hoss-like. And Drury should be Salacious Crumb: "A-HAHAHA Thanks." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 As Dave heads for his ship, another pilot rushes up to him and grabs his arm. BIGOOSE Dave! I don't believe it! How'd you get here... are you going out with us?! DAVE Bigoose! Of course, I'll be in there with you! Listen, have I got some stories to tell... Czech Leader, a rugged handsome man in his forties, comes up behind Dave and Bigoose. He has the confident smile of a born leader, even if he is an GalaxyBears fan. CZECH LEADER Are you... Dave Cobainwalker? Have you been checked out on the Incom.com/sixty-five? BIGOOSE Sir, Dave is the best bushposter in the outer rim boards. Czech Leader pats Dave on the back as they stop in front of his fighter. CZECH LEADER I met your father once when I was just a boy. He was a great poster. You'll do all right. If you've got half of your father's posting skill, you'll do better than all right. DAVE Thank you, sir. I'll try. Czech Leader hurries to his own ship. BIGOOSE I've got to get aboard. Listen, you'll tell me your stories when we come back. All right? DAVE I told you I'd make it someday, Bigoose. BIGOOSE (going off) You did, all right. It's going to be like old times when we wrecked Old Man Joseph’s marriage, Dave. We're a couple of shooting stars that'll never be stopped! Dave laughs and shakes his head in agreement. He heads for his ship. (LATER) INT. VADERSAULT’S COCKPIT Vadersault adjusts his control stick and his picture of Team ECK. INT. BIGOOSE'S COCKPIT Bigoose looks around at the SMARK fighters. INT. DAVE'S gPc-WING FIGHTER Dave looks into his search window. He moves it away for a moment and ponders its use. He looks back into the computer search again. BIGOOSE (over headset) Hurry up, Dave! EXT. SPACE AROUND THE STAR OF OBLIVION Vadersault and his wingmen race through the Star of Oblivion trench. Bigoose moves in to cover for Dave, but Vadersault gains on him. INT. BIGOOSE'S COCKPIT Bigoose sees the SMARK fighter aiming at him. BIGOOSE Wait! INT. VADERSAULT’S COCKPIT Vadersault squeezes the flame button on his controls. INT. BIGOOSE’S COCKPIT Bigoose's cockpit explodes around him, lighting him in red and blowing him off of the internet. EXT. SURFACE OF THE STAR OF OBLIVION Bigoose's ship bursts into a million flaming bits and scatters across the surface. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DerangedHermit 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Yours is coming up shortly, don't worry. Am I anyone? And not a sucky Stormtrooper. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caboose 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 I was hoping I wasn't going to be Luke's bum best mate. Oh well, at least I got a talking part and went out in a blaze of glory. Or crap piloting, which ever way you look at it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Anglesault Report post Posted June 23, 2004 It's Team WRECK. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest FrigidSoul Report post Posted June 23, 2004 And I think Sass would have been better suited to be Chewbacca, since they're both pretty hoss-like. I'm a big hairy beast in real life though. It works. Also, Kotz you typed Princess Leia on mistake right... SASSONNA Well, the TSMpire doesn't consider a small one-man flame to be any threat, or they'd have a tighter defense. An analysis of the plans provided by Princess Leia has demonstrated a weakness in the super moderator. there Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord of The Curry 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 I call the "Lazy Ewok #3" bit part. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
justsoyouknow 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 I'm furious. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest cobainwasmurdered Report post Posted June 23, 2004 I'm furious. Our plan is working to perfection then. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 It's Team WRECK. Team ECK > Team WRECK And you people do realize I'm not actually writing this stuff, right? The scripts for the films are available all over the internet, I'm just changing out names and parts of the plot and such. If you see one of the actual trilogy names come up, it's just a matter of me forgetting to change it. JSYK was already told who he's going to be, now he's just pissing and moaning. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
justsoyouknow 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Please. I'm not pissing and moaning, I'm furious that Anglesault is the main villain. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 24, 2004 If you can think of a more reviled (non-iB) person in this board's history, I'd love to hear it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Anglesault Report post Posted June 24, 2004 I've had several face runs Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DerangedHermit 0 Report post Posted June 24, 2004 If you can think of a more reviled (non-iB) person in this board's history, I'd love to hear it. Eagan? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Art Sandusky 0 Report post Posted June 24, 2004 Dave's ship barrels down the trench. INT. VADERSAULT'S COCKPIT Vadersault's flaming computer swings around into position. Vadersault takes careful aim on Dave's gPc-wing fighter. VADERSAULT I have you now. He pushes the emoticon buttons. EXT. SURFACE OF THE STAR OF OBLIVION The three SMARK fighters move in on Dave. As Vadersault's center fighter unleashes a volley of ghey emoticons, Hermit-X47's SMARK fighter is hit and explodes into flame. The two remaining ships continue to move in. INT. DAVE’S gPc-WING FIGHTER - COCKPIT Dave looks about, wondering whose flaming destroyed Vadersault's wingman. INT. VADERSAULT'S COCKPIT Vadersault is taken by surprise, and looks out from his cockpit. VADERSAULT What? INT. VADERSAULT'S WINGMAN - COCKPIT Vadersault's wingman searches around him trying to locate the unknown attacker. INT. MILLENNIUM FLETCH - COCKPIT Bank and Soulbacca grin from ear to ear. BANK (yelling) Yahoo! I am SO cooler than all of you! EXT. SPACE AROUND THE STAR OF OBLIVION The Millennium Fletch heads right at the two SMARK fighters. It's a collision course. INT. WINGMAN'S COCKPIT The wingman spots the pirateship coming at him and warns the Dark Lord. TRIVIA-247 Look out! EXT. STAR OF OBLIVION TRENCH Vadersault's profoundly retarded wingman panics at the sight of the oncoming pirate starship and veers radically to one side, colliding with Vadersault's SMARK fighter in the process. Vadersault's wingman crashes into the side wall of the trench and explodes. Vadersault's damaged ship spins out of the trench with a damaged wing. VADERSAULT Goddamn Undertaker marks, they can’t do anything right! EXT. STAR OF OBLIVION Vadersault's ship spins out of control with a bent solar fin, heading for the expanse of the internet. INT. VADERSAULT'S COCKPIT Vadersault turns round and round in circles as his ship spins into endless cyberspace. EXT. SURFACE OF THE STAR OF OBLIVION Solo's ship moves in toward the Star of Oblivion trench. INT. MILLENNIUM FLETCH - COCKPIT Solo, smiling, speaks to Dave over his headset mike. BANK (into mike) You're all clear, kid. INT. WDI OUTPOST - WAR FORUM Welsh and the others listen to Solo's transmission. BANK (over speaker) Now let's blow this thing like my massive e-cock and go home! INT. DAVE'S gPc-WING FIGHTER - COCKPIT Dave looks up and smiles. He concentrates on the DDR post, then fires his laser quotation-aided flame. EXT. SURFACE OF THE STAR OF OBLIVION Dave's flame shoots toward the post and seems to simply disappear into the super moderator and not 0wn yet. But the flame does find its mark and has gone into the database and is heading for the main psyche of the super moderator. INT. DAVE'S gPc-WING FIGHTER - COCKPIT Dave throws his head back in relief. INT. STAR OF OBLIVION An Imperial soldier runs to the control panel board and pulls the board eradication lever as the lightboard behind him lights up. INTERCOM VOICE Stand by to fire at Rebel board. EXT. SPACE AROUND THE STAR OF OBLIVION Two gPc-wings, an OAOAST-wing, and the pirateship race toward WDI in the distance. INT. STAR OF OBLIVION Several Imperial posters, flanking a pensive Grand Moff Crucifixio, busily push control levers and buttons. INTERCOM VOICE Standing by. The rumble of a distant explosion begins. EXT. SPACE AROUND THE STAR OF OBLIVION The Rebel ships race out of sight, leaving the moon-like Star of Oblivion alone against a blanket of e-stars. Several small flashes appear on the surface. The Star of Oblivion bursts into a supernova, creating a spectacular heavenly display. INT. MILLENNIUM FLETCH - COCKPIT BANK Great shot, kid. That was one in a million. INT. DAVE'S gPc-WING FIGHTER - COCKPIT Dave is at ease, and his eyes are closed. WILL'S VOICE Remember, the Whorce will be with you... always. The ship rocks back and forth. EXT. VADERSAULT’S SMARK FIGHTER Vadersault's ship spins off into e-space. INT. VADERSAULT’S SMARK FIGHTER - COCKPIT VADERSAULT I blame the Test system for this! EXT. E-SPACE The Rebel ships race toward the fourth board of WDI. INT. WDI OUTPOST - MAIN INDEX Dave climbs out of his starship flamer and is cheered by a throng of ground lurkers and posters. Dave climbs down the ladder as they all welcome him with laughter, cheers, and shouting. Princess Welsh rushes toward him. WELSH Dave! Dave! Dave! She throws her arms around Dave and hugs him as they dance around a circle. Solo runs in toward Luke and they embrace one another, slapping each other on the back. BANK (laughing) Hey! Hey! DAVE (laughing) I knew you'd come back! I just knew it! BANK Well, I had to come back and say I was working all of you! Dave and Bank look at one another, as Solo playfully shoves at Dave's face. Welsh moves in between them. WELSH (laughing) Hey, I knew there was more to you than quasi-trolling. Dave looks toward the ship. DAVE Oh, no! The fried little R2-ALF2 is lifted off the back of the fighter and carried off under the worried eyes of Agnes. AGNES Oh, my! ALF-2! Can you hear me? Say something! (to mechanic) You can repair him, can't you? TECHNICIAN We'll get to work on him right away. Get your hand off my ass. AGNES You must repair him! Sir, if any of my circuits or gears or a blowjob will help, I'll gladly donate them. DAVE He'll be all right. INT. WDI OUTPOST - MAIN PAGE Dave, Bank, and Soulbacca enter the huge expanse of the main page. Hundreds of posters are lined up in neat rows. Banners are flying and at the far end stands a vision in white, the beautiful young Senator Welsh. Dave and the others solemnly march up the long aisle and kneel before Senator Welsh. From one side of the temple marches a shined-up and fully repaired R2-ALF-2. He waddles up to the group and stands next to an equally pristine Agnes, who is rather awestruck by the whole event and is seen wiping his mouth of some unknown substance. Soulbacca is confused. Sassona and several other dignitaries sit on the left of the Princess. Welsh is dressed in a long white dress and is staggeringly beautiful. She rises and places a gold medallion around Bank's neck. He winks at her. She slaps him for thinking he looks like Justin Timberlake of the PopStari system. She then repeats the ceremony with Dave, except the slapping, who is moved by the event. They turn and face the assembled posters, who all bow before them. Soulbacca growls and ALF-2 beeps with happiness. FADE OUT. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest FrigidSoul Report post Posted June 24, 2004 I'm furious that Anglesault is the main villain. Actually the main villian is whomever the Dark Emporer ends up being. If I had a mic I would make a .wav file of me doing the Wookie rolling r howl. I can do it to perfection. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
