Dr. Tom Posted July 23, 2004 Report Posted July 23, 2004 Can I be your Secretary of State, Mike? I'd love to give the middle finger to every leader in the Middle East. The day before we bomb the shit out of them, of course.
Guest Sagrada3099 Posted July 23, 2004 Report Posted July 23, 2004 I just wanna be a Cardinal... ...of Funk.
Guest MikeSC Posted July 23, 2004 Report Posted July 23, 2004 Can I be your Secretary of State, Mike? I'd love to give the middle finger to every leader in the Middle East. The day before we bomb the shit out of them, of course. I actually thought of you as Sec. of Education, telling dumb Johnny to "fuck off" if he can't multiple properly. "But, Sec. Tom, my teacher never taught me that" "Well, you're too far gone now. I sentence you to death" Plus, I'm thinking Tom + teacher union = fun. I just wanna be a Cardinal... ...of Funk. I'm actually thinking of adding ninjas to the Catholic Church. -=Mike
Stephen Joseph Posted July 23, 2004 Report Posted July 23, 2004 I'm calling Fed Res Chair right now Mike...
Jobber of the Week Posted July 23, 2004 Report Posted July 23, 2004 Wow, it'll be just like the Bush Administration. A bunch of great minds united around... Well, you know. It'll also answer that life-long question, "can the secret service protect the President from the First Lady? And if she has secret service protection, is there a big gang fight in the room or what?" We've been wondering that one since Madison.
Vern Gagne Posted July 23, 2004 Report Posted July 23, 2004 I'll throw my hat in the VEEP sweepstakes. From a battleground state in Minnesota. Can appeal to voters in the Midwest. A union member.
Dr. Tom Posted July 23, 2004 Report Posted July 23, 2004 I actually thought of you as Sec. of Education, telling dumb Johnny to "fuck off" if he can't multiple properly. "But, Sec. Tom, my teacher never taught me that" "Well, you're too far gone now. I sentence you to death" Nah, I'd tell him to get the sand out of his vagina and stop being so thin-skinned. Then, when he would inevitably ask, "What's a vagina," I could enact my Pr0n In The Classrooms Plan. Plus, I'm thinking Tom + teacher union = fun. It would be... at least for me. Maybe I can have both Cabinet posts? I'm good at time management...
Justice Posted July 23, 2004 Report Posted July 23, 2004 I actually thought of you as Sec. of Education, telling dumb Johnny to "fuck off" if he can't multiple properly. "But, Sec. Tom, my teacher never taught me that" "Well, you're too far gone now. I sentence you to death" Nah, I'd tell him to get the sand out of his vagina and stop being so thin-skinned. Then, when he would inevitably ask, "What's a vagina," I could enact my Pr0n In The Classrooms Plan. "I understand that many of you think my new teacher/student disciplining policy is vicious and quite possibly barbaric, but I assure you that it is derived from only the most qualified studies." *Holds up copy of The Substitute.*
Jobber of the Week Posted July 24, 2004 Report Posted July 24, 2004 I could enact my Pr0n In The Classrooms Plan. I support "Leave No Child A Virgin."
Guest MikeSC Posted July 24, 2004 Report Posted July 24, 2004 I actually thought of you as Sec. of Education, telling dumb Johnny to "fuck off" if he can't multiple properly. "But, Sec. Tom, my teacher never taught me that" "Well, you're too far gone now. I sentence you to death" Nah, I'd tell him to get the sand out of his vagina and stop being so thin-skinned. Then, when he would inevitably ask, "What's a vagina," I could enact my Pr0n In The Classrooms Plan. Plus, I'm thinking Tom + teacher union = fun. It would be... at least for me. Maybe I can have both Cabinet posts? I'm good at time management... So, would your pron plan involve high quality porn? I couldn't go along with cheap crap or anything involving midgets. Also, do you take bribes? I don't want to be the only unethical one. -=Mike
Styles Posted July 24, 2004 Report Posted July 24, 2004 Surely, you've saved a Cabinet position for me? Hell, I could even be the National Security Advisor since I'm one of the only posters you can trust since I don't hate you and all! I nominate KKK for Attorney General.
Guest MikeSC Posted July 24, 2004 Report Posted July 24, 2004 Surely, you've saved a Cabinet position for me? Hell, I could even be the National Security Advisor since I'm one of the only posters you can trust since I don't hate you and all! I nominate KKK for Attorney General. I'm planning on rule by tyranny. You ask for positions with "please" and "sir" -=Mike
Styles Posted July 24, 2004 Report Posted July 24, 2004 Surely, you've saved a Cabinet position for me? Hell, I could even be the National Security Advisor since I'm one of the only posters you can trust since I don't hate you and all! I nominate KKK for Attorney General. I'm planning on rule by tyranny. You ask for positions with "please" and "sir" -=Mike Please, sir go fuck yourself! See, I have attitude, I could help carry out your racist agenda and keep your enemies silenced and properly persecuted.
Guest MikeSC Posted July 24, 2004 Report Posted July 24, 2004 Surely, you've saved a Cabinet position for me? Hell, I could even be the National Security Advisor since I'm one of the only posters you can trust since I don't hate you and all! I nominate KKK for Attorney General. I'm planning on rule by tyranny. You ask for positions with "please" and "sir" -=Mike Please, sir go fuck yourself! See, I have attitude, I could help carry out your racist agenda and keep your enemies silenced and properly persecuted. We spell "fuck" phuck --- because we're insanely cool like that. In a pinch, though, we could go with pfuck. And our policies aren't racist. They're just rabidly anti-France and anti-Canada. Call us O'Reillyian with our philosophies. -=Mike
Styles Posted July 24, 2004 Report Posted July 24, 2004 Surely, you've saved a Cabinet position for me? Hell, I could even be the National Security Advisor since I'm one of the only posters you can trust since I don't hate you and all! I nominate KKK for Attorney General. I'm planning on rule by tyranny. You ask for positions with "please" and "sir" -=Mike Please, sir go fuck yourself! See, I have attitude, I could help carry out your racist agenda and keep your enemies silenced and properly persecuted. We spell "fuck" phuck --- because we're insanely cool like that. In a pinch, though, we could go with pfuck. And our policies aren't racist. They're just rabidly anti-France and anti-Canada. Call us O'Reillyian with our philosophies. -=Mike That's the no spin truth! Afterall you're just looking out for the folks since they need protection from the smear merchants who try to distort the truth, if I may so opine. That was pithy...phuck!
Jobber of the Week Posted July 24, 2004 Report Posted July 24, 2004 Call us O'Reillyian with our philosophies. Does that mean you bend like a piece of tinfoil once populist opinion stops swinging your way? It's too bad Candidate Butch, er, I mean, Marney bowed out of the race. Then we could get all our France hate with additional STEEL SPINES for all, to boot.
Dr. Tom Posted July 25, 2004 Report Posted July 25, 2004 So, would your pron plan involve high quality porn? I couldn't go along with cheap crap or anything involving midgets. Of course. Only the best pr0n for the kids. THINK OF THE CHILDREN~! Also, do you take bribes? I don't want to be the only unethical one. I'm all about payment for services rendered.
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