NYRevolution, Royal Rumble posters inside

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

And no I don't.

 

Jesus Christ, he's a 4th rate Brock Lesnar.

[Guest LooneyTune]

Except Brock Lesnar ran off for that glorious NFL career year he's having with the Minnesota Vikings, while Batista is going through the "Wait your turn and maybe you'll get to the top of the mountain" push.

 

Batista looks like a monster...Brock looked like a gorilla with that goofy hopping.

[razazteca 0]

It's good to see Jeff Hardy's flailing body on a WWE poster again!! Notice him about to perform the sloppy Swanton above Chris Jericho, who is hauntingly standing at the bottom of the ladder (as always).

 

 

See: THAT is reading too much into things.

I thought it was New Jack doing a balcony dive onto Sabu myself.

[Lord of The Curry 0]

Except Brock Lesnar ran off for that glorious NFL career year he's having with the Minnesota Vikings, while Batista is going through the "Wait your turn and maybe you'll get to the top of the mountain" push.

 

Batista looks like a monster...Brock looked like a gorilla with that goofy hopping.

A gorilla that had more promise in him then any WWE wrestler in the last 5+ years.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Brocks strength, speed, agility, timing, moves, etc etc etc were all superior to Batistas. The only thing he lacked was the suit.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

It's good to see Jeff Hardy's flailing body on a WWE poster again!!  Notice him about to perform the sloppy Swanton above Chris Jericho, who is hauntingly standing at the bottom of the ladder (as always).

 

 

See: THAT is reading too much into things.

I thought it was New Jack doing a balcony dive onto Sabu myself.

I could see Sabu doing his pose as a knockoff to the Broadway promo poster of Saturday Night Fever (featuring the famous Travolta pose).

 

 

Either that, or on the Rumble poster, the bottom guy would have to have Sabu's back arch and look.

[Guest Fook_Theta]

I not sure if Val Venis could improve the Money Shot, but that would be one fun way of doing it.

[Precious Roy 0]

First thing I thought of with the Rumble poster was Donkey Kong. That's always good.

Maybe that means a return for Brock Lesnar!

Nice!

[SuperJerk 0]

And what the fuck is that thing after Royal Rumble, it looks like something from the game shoots and ladders.

You're HOW old?

[Guest TheLastBoyscout]

Brocks strength, speed, agility, timing, moves, etc etc etc were all superior to Batistas. The only thing he lacked was the suit.

Batista seems a lot better on the mic.

 

And it seems that people actually want to see Batista turn, which is nice.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Batista hasn't had to cut an actual promo yet, so he hasn't had to do anything other than memorize a few lines. Brock, at his peak, was much more popular than Batista. And there is that lil thing known as matches, has Batista had anything over ***? Anything *at* ***?

[Fökai 0]

I still haven't seen a singles match of Batista that I'd consider to be the highlight of the show...or even a good match that relied on his ability to work the heel-face dynamic.

[Twisted Intestine 0]

First thing I thought of with the Rumble poster was Donkey Kong. That's always good.

Maybe that means a return for Brock Lesnar!

Nice!

I've always associated D'Lo Brown with Donkey Kong...

 

Tell me he doesn't walk like him.

[Guest LooneyTune]

Brock was horrible on the mic for pretty much his entire run. He really wasn't allowed to do anything outside of "towering monster hoss" stuff, except for the SSP where he landed on his head (that looked sick).

 

Batista has been very vocal about how he knows he needs to improve, and he's done so for the past year. When he first arrived on RAW after the horrible Deacon Batista thing with Reverend D'Von (Wrestlecrap!), he was completely heatless and was probably the most atrocious worker until Scott Steiner showed up. He's far from being great, but he has potential to be a Main Eventer some day with more work.

[The Czech Republic 0]

Batista also acknowledges that he sucks and needs to improve, so that just makes smarks want to cuddle with him even more.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

The New Years Revolution poster looks real.

 

The Royal Rumble Poster looks like someone from Drama class got a hold of photoshop.

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Brock was horrible on the mic for pretty much his entire run.

 

He cut some good promos in his "greatest champ of all time" days.

 

He really wasn't allowed to do anything outside of "towering monster hoss" stuff, except for the SSP where he landed on his head (that looked sick).

 

Brocks "towering monster hoss" stuff was some of the best of its kind, certainly the best in the WWE, and he incorporated his amateur wrestling much better than Kurt could. Batista, Tomko, Heidenreich, Snitsky, etc, etc, etc, are all cut from the same cloth - crappy spinebusters and powerbombs do not a good giant make. Don't make the mistake of thinking that Brock wasn't something special because he was made from something entirely different

 

He Batista has been very vocal about how he knows he needs to improve, and he's done so for the past year.

 

Where is the improvement? It doesn't translate into good matches, so why the fuck should I care? Main Event Work in the WWE has taken a pretty big dip since HHH has dominated the scene.

[Kardo 0]

Batista hasn't had to cut an actual promo yet, so he hasn't had to do anything other than memorize a few lines. Brock, at his peak, was much more popular than Batista. And there is that lil thing known as matches, has Batista had anything over ***? Anything *at* ***?

vs. Val Venis in the last week of October 2001

[bradolson 0]

When I saw the RR poster I thought for a second they might be bringing back the old triple-cage match from WCW, lol.

[slimm44 0]

Anyone seen the new Royal Rumble poster? It's a lot different than the one previously posted.

[SuperJerk 0]

The Royal Rumble Poster looks like someone from Drama class got a hold of photoshop.

And the winner of the best smart-ass crack about the Rumble poster goes to...

 

...MarvinisaLunatic!

 

Good job, buddy.

 

Everyone else, better luck next year.

[strummer 0]

 

 

Top, I think that is Benoit, Edge, HHH, and Flair

 

Bottom I can make out Big Show, Mysterio, Angle and JBL

 

What about the others, I think RVD is there somewhere on the SD side

[Guest LooneyTune]

What a fucking lame poster for a wrestling show. (Note I said WRESTLING Show. For a movie poster it looks cool, but not for wrestling)

[Slickster 0]

This is brilliant...perhaps an extended tie-in to WM21, where 'WrestleMania goes Hollywood?'

[slimm44 0]

Hahaha thats hilarious

[Guest Phenom]

MICHAELS: Against SmackDown! we need every man we got.

 

BENOIT: Trips don't belong any more.

 

MICHAELS: Cut it, Crippler. I and Trips started RAW.

 

BENOIT: Well, he acts like he don't wanna belong.

 

JERICHO: Who wouldn't wanna belong to SmackDown!?

 

BENOIT: Trips ain't been with us for over a month.

 

ORTON: What about the day we clobbered The Dudleys?

 

BATISTA: Which we couldn't have done without Trips.

 

ORTON: He saved my ever-lovin' neck!

 

MICHAELS: Right! He's always come through for us and he will now.

 

(sings)

When you're on RAW, you're on RAW all the way

From your first Venis match to your firing day

When you're on RAW if suck up to Ross

You will always get pushed over some nameless Hoss

 

You're never alone,

You're never disconnected!

You're home with your own:

When company's expected,

You're well protected!

 

Then you are set with a capital R,

Which you'll never forget till you're hit with a car

When you're on RAW,

You stay on RAW!

 

MICHAELS: I know Trips like I know me. I guarantee you can count him in.

 

BENOIT: In, out, let's get crackin'.

 

BATISTA: Where you gonna find Bradshaw?

 

MICHAELS: At the Royal Rumble.

 

BENJAMIN: But the Rumble's neutral territory.

 

MICHAELS: (innocently) I'm gonna make nice there! I'm only gonna challenge him.

 

BATISTA: Great, Daddy-O!

 

MICHAELS: So everybody dress up sweet and sharp.

 

Oh, when RAW comes to that Pay-Per-Veiw show,

We'll be the craziest guys since Al Snow!

And when the boss see us maul The Big Show,

He's gonna flip, gonna flop, gonna give us our dough!

 

MICHAELS: Hey. Cool. Easy. Sweet. Meet Trips and me at ten. And walk tall!

 

BATISTA: We always walk tall!

 

ORTON: We're RAW!

 

BENOIT: The greatest!

 

When you're on RAW, you get all the cards delt ,

You're the gold medal kid with the Heavyweight Belt!

When you're on RAW you get your diva tramp

Little boy, you're a man, little man, you're the champ!

 

Evolution's here,

Our cylinders are clickin'!

Team Angle, steer clear

'Cause ev'ry SmackDown! title, is so invital!

 

On Spike TV, like a bat out of hell.

Someone gets in our way, they'll ring the fucking bell!

TV 14, censorship, step aside!

Better go underground, better run, better hide!

 

We're drawin' the line,

So keep your noses hidden!

We're hangin' a sign,

Says "Cruiserweights forbidden", and we ain't kiddin'!

 

RAW's still the best, (WHAT?) And we're gonna beat

Ev'ry last cruiserweight on the whole fuggin' street!

On the whole! Ever! Mother! Fuggin'! Street! Yeah!

[Guest LooneyTune]

You have too much free time, Phenom. Way too much free time.

[SuperJerk 0]

(sings)

When you're on RAW, you're on RAW all the way

From your first Venis match to your firing day

When you're on RAW if suck up to Ross

You will always get pushed over some nameless Hoss

 

You're never alone,

You're never disconnected!

You're home with your own:

When company's expected,

You're well protected!

 

Then you are set with a capital R,

Which you'll never forget till you're hit with a car

When you're on RAW,

You stay on RAW!

And the winner for "Best song parody about the Royal Rumble poster" goes too...

 

Phenom!

 

**applause**

 

 

 

(Are my awards any less meaningless than the Grammys? Hells no!)

[Guest Tjhe CyNick]

MICHAELS: Against SmackDown! we need every man we got.

 

BENOIT: Trips don't belong any more.

 

MICHAELS: Cut it, Crippler. I and Trips started RAW.

 

BENOIT: Well, he acts like he don't wanna belong.

 

JERICHO: Who wouldn't wanna belong to SmackDown!?

 

BENOIT: Trips ain't been with us for over a month.

 

ORTON: What about the day we clobbered The Dudleys?

 

BATISTA: Which we couldn't have done without Trips.

 

ORTON: He saved my ever-lovin' neck!

 

MICHAELS: Right! He's always come through for us and he will now.

 

(sings)

When you're on RAW, you're on RAW all the way

From your first Venis match to your firing day

When you're on RAW if suck up to Ross

You will always get pushed over some nameless Hoss

 

You're never alone,

You're never disconnected!

You're home with your own:

When company's expected,

You're well protected!

 

Then you are set with a capital R,

Which you'll never forget till you're hit with a car

When you're on RAW,

You stay on RAW!

 

MICHAELS: I know Trips like I know me. I guarantee you can count him in.

 

BENOIT: In, out, let's get crackin'.

 

BATISTA: Where you gonna find Bradshaw?

 

MICHAELS: At the Royal Rumble.

 

BENJAMIN: But the Rumble's neutral territory.

 

MICHAELS: (innocently) I'm gonna make nice there! I'm only gonna challenge him.

 

BATISTA: Great, Daddy-O!

 

MICHAELS: So everybody dress up sweet and sharp.

 

Oh, when RAW comes to that Pay-Per-Veiw show,

We'll be the craziest guys since Al Snow!

And when the boss see us maul The Big Show,

He's gonna flip, gonna flop, gonna give us our dough!

 

MICHAELS: Hey. Cool. Easy. Sweet. Meet Trips and me at ten. And walk tall!

 

BATISTA: We always walk tall!

 

ORTON: We're RAW!

 

BENOIT: The greatest!

 

When you're on RAW, you get all the cards delt ,

You're the gold medal kid with the Heavyweight Belt!

When you're on RAW you get your diva tramp

Little boy, you're a man, little man, you're the champ!

 

Evolution's here,

Our cylinders are clickin'!

Team Angle, steer clear

'Cause ev'ry SmackDown! title, is so invital!

 

On Spike TV, like a bat out of hell.

Someone gets in our way, they'll ring the fucking bell!

TV 14, censorship, step aside!

Better go underground, better run, better hide!

 

We're drawin' the line,

So keep your noses hidden!

We're hangin' a sign,

Says "Cruiserweights forbidden", and we ain't kiddin'!

 

RAW's still the best, (WHAT?) And we're gonna beat

Ev'ry last cruiserweight on the whole fuggin' street!

On the whole! Ever! Mother! Fuggin'! Street! Yeah!

Best Post...Ever!

[Guest Phenom]

(sings)

When you're on RAW, you're on RAW all the way

From your first Venis match to your firing day

When you're on RAW if suck up to Ross

You will always get pushed over some nameless Hoss

 

You're never alone,

You're never disconnected!

You're home with your own:

When company's expected,

You're well protected!

 

Then you are set with a capital R,

Which you'll never forget till you're hit with a car

When you're on RAW,

You stay on RAW!

And the winner for "Best song parody about the Royal Rumble poster" goes too...

 

Phenom!

 

**applause**

 

 

 

(Are my awards any less meaningless than the Grammys? Hells no!)

I'd like to thank my parents for raiseing me; my sister for making me watch West Side Story over and over again; I'd like to thank the acadamy for making my dreams come true; and last off, I'd like to thank the internet, for without it, none of this would be possible! Good night!