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Posted

My girlfriend and I live far apart. I've never loved anyone before her; not my family, not myself, not anyone. At the moment we're what you call "net-dating." We've been through a lot of issues together the past year and a half, but we still love each other and we still want to be together in the real world.

 

She's made me happier than anyone else ever has.

Do you frown on this? Do you know anyone that would frown on this?

 

I've never had a girlfriend in real life. Never tried to get one, either. Most girls look down on me as some sort of scum. Now do you frown on this?

Posted

When I was in highschool, I had a couple of month-long, mostly makeout-based relationships with "real" girls before getting into a very serious (for 17, anyway) net-based relationship. I got laughed at...a lot. But, I was happy for nearly a year, and it was worth it to me. We did eventually meet, ever so briefly, and it was...nice.

 

Here's what you've got to consider:

 

1. First off, ask yourself objectively why you think girls look down at you. Is it a bullshit reason like looks or money, or do you tend to rip the legs off of puppies? You seem like an alright guy to me, but I don't really know you, and if you're doing something to legitamately frighten or bother women, if/when you and this woman meet, she's likely to be frightened and/or bothered. Use this knowledge as a chance to objectively look at yourself and try to better yourself, if needed.

 

//Tony Robbins

 

2. Are you in a position where you will be able to meet with her reasonably soon? Call "reasonable" within six months. If not, are you attempting to do so? A lot of people use "net-dating" as escapism; a way to get away from life's problems. Make sure this isn't you. You owe that to both yourself and this girl.

 

Furthermore, I don't know about you, but even months into my relationship, I still had the nagging doubts. Is she real? Is she who she says to be? For me, a face-to-face meet was the only way to know for sure. Likely, she has some of the same doubts, even if she won't admit them to you. If you say you want to meet, and she seems resistant, that doesn't mean to break it off immediately, but it IS a red flag.

 

3. Are you sure you're not settling? Luckily, the girl I was with was very pretty -- WAY the fuck out of my league, I tell you what. But, I assume you've traded pics at this point (if not, do so). When you meet, you're going to need to be attracted to each other. Now, attraction can grow from love, but there needs to be SOMETHING there to work with. Just make sure that you're not going to lose the romantic fancy once you meet.

 

Good luck, man. And don't worry about anyone who looks down on it. There's a stigma, but first off, this is 2006, the friggin' age of computers, and furthermore, if you're happy, that's all that matters.

Guest Princess Leena
Posted
1. First off, ask yourself objectively why you think girls look down at you. Is it a bullshit reason like looks or money

 

Those aren't bullshit reasons.

 

Likely, she has some of the same doubts, even if she won't admit them to you. If you say you want to meet, and she seems resistant, that doesn't mean to break it off immediately, but it IS a red flag.

 

If iyou've known each other well for roughly 6 months, and one still isn't comfortable about meeting you... I'd say to cut it off. And this is from someone who's been stalked by an asshole on a wrestling board after talking with them for a few months. But, make sure not to go too fast. Like some certain individuals that want me to call them on our 2nd AIM conversation.

Posted

OMG STOP TALKING ABOUT YOU AND FRIDGE. We get it; there was no reason to say anything more than "take it from someone who knows" except to throw it in his face.

 

As far as looks and money go, I agree, there has to be a base attraction. But money? Fuck that. Love don't have a price tag, girl. *snaps fingers*

Guest Princess Leena
Posted

I was just pointing out an example. And Fridge isn't the only one from these boards who has done such a thing.

 

I guess money isn't important for certain age groups. I'm guessing you met this girl when you were in your lower to mid 20's. Very few have a good income then, so it's rarely significant.

Posted

I don't know. I can't see it being a factor when I'm 35, 40...but then, I've never been that old, so who's to say. I was 17, incidentally -- not a lot of expenses at that age, so money definitely wasn't an issue.

 

And wait, other people have done that to you? Sheesh, girl, you are just not good at AIM, or something.

Posted

Hold on. I've gotta break from the course of the thread for a moment.

 

Kotz: you do NOT get "remarkably average." It's mine. You used it and it sounded lame, so I took it and made it my own and now it's ironic. I made it ironic; I made it mean something. It's mine. And to steal someone else's material....why, I'd say that's remarkably below average.

 

Okay, thread back on.

Guest Princess Leena
Posted
Sheesh, girl, you are just not good at AIM, or something.

 

I'm admittedly the worst at it. Since I never talk, and block people for no reason.

Posted

If my computer had a suitable hole, I'd fuck it. I...I thought that was clear.

I don't get it.

 

Now wait. Before you either rush off to defend it, or shoot off some sarcastic comment about how, of course, I wouldn't get it, or make some other art-school-dropout "clever" remark, let me clarify: I don't get it because it's not funny.

 

Leena, why you gotta be blockin' people?

Posted

I think we're living up to the title of this thread tonight, but we're doing it everywhere, cause we can do it anywhere.

Guest Princess Leena
Posted
Leena, why you gotta be blockin' people?

 

I get annoyed far too easily.

 

Like tonight, I blocked someone because I was trying to watch tennis on my computer. Now I have to bullshit apologize because he was already very paranoid with me, and he'll whine for a couple days, and then I'll probably block him again for whining.

Posted

I hate people like that. I mean, jeez. Sometimes you wanna sign off, lie down, and just read, or in my case eat. It doesn't mean I hate you.

 

AIM is kind of full of bitches, now that I think about it.

Posted

Whenever you are on, I'm not. It's definitely school related, I'm stressing bad right now.

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