funniest things you heard from marks

[slabinskia 0]

I found this read to be hilarious.check it out and tell some stories.

 

http://board.deathvalleydriver.com/index.p...opic=39281&st=0

[snuffbox 0]

" We used to have a wrestling radio show over here, and the main presenter guy was unbeleivable. Tommy Boyd, who was supposed to know something about wrestling seeing as he got payed to talk about it, came up with such pearls of wisdom as blood being painted on wrestlers faces by make-up artists under the ring, Christians pyro being added after by computers, and Howard Finkel being a Hologram."

 

Oh yeah, that one is really agreeing with my self-prescribed painkillers right now.

[haws bah gawd 0]

I've got a great one. Many Summers ago when WWF was just starting up the Kane angle, Undertaker "came out and told the truth" about what happened to Kane. He did his promo in a dark lockeroom about how a fire broke out in the funeral home, but Kane and his parents didnt make it out. Well anyways, my cousin Judy was watching with me that night, and she actually started crying because of the tragedy that happened to the Undertakers family. That brings me much laughter to this day.

[The Buzz 0]

When I was watching Wrestlemania I heard about how HBK was 50 something, Hogan and Flair both in their seventies, how Ultimate Warrior and Lex Luger died in a plane crash, and many more mind boggling one liners from the group of people I was watching with.

 

On a more funny note one of the guys in the room asked if Jericho has ever won a match in the WWE.

[snuffbox 0]

Ive been told that Mr. T and Taz are one in the same. Seriously.

[slabinskia 0]

All I know after reading that thread is that Barry Windham was Gangrel.

[The Mandarin 0]

My favourite wrestling related thread of all time. It tops (barely, but it does) the eBay auction for a pile of Jakks Pacific WWE action figures that included Charro Guarro, Curt Handle, The Sutton and Sarvip Baker. That still is the most horrendous thing I've ever read.

 

In 6th grade I had a friend who would always ask me questions about wrestling since he knew I was a wrestling fan, and I swear he literally asked me this once: "Hey Chris, you know how Goldberg was undefeated for like 200 wins, right? Do you think that if I SHOT Goldberg he would live?"

 

God, I loved that one. Old man yelling "AND I SAY FUCK YOU" at Koko B. Ware was hysterical as well.

[Ravenbomb 0]

somewhat like the Kane/Taker thing from that thread, this one guy said that Undertaker (Calloway) played both the Undertaker and Kane, except when both guys were in the same place. I brought up the whole "fact that Undertaker has tattoos all over his arms" and he said that they were just makeup

 

 

me and this one bloke were watching the Rise and Fall of ECW DVD, and Raven was apologizing for the crucifixion. He said his name (Scott Levy, pronounced LEE-vee), and my friend says, in what I still believe all seriousness, "Heh, moron, it's pronounced Leh-VEE"

[Jericholic82 0]

All I know after reading that thread is that Barry Windham was Gangrel.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well duh!

[Guest Stunt Granny]

Bret and Owen are NOT brothers.

 

Vince McMahon is not the WWF owner, Jack Tunney is.

 

WCW owns the WWF, the WWF is thier minor league.

[Jericholic82 0]

not on the board, but I just heard that Paul Heyman bought ECW back from Stephanie.

[Guest Ransome]

This seems to be a common mistake among wrestling fans, but a friend of mine is absolutely convinced that the Undertaker of 1991 and the Undertaker of today are different actors. Other than that, I've heard of nothing even remotely close to the wacky claims apparently made by marks in that thread - where do you guys find these people?

[Art Sandusky 0]

Someone else I know is convinced that there was a different Undertaker back in the early days of the gimmick.

[Guest Brian]

I really can't stand to be around most other wrestling fans. You hear some of the stupidest shit waiting out in line, all this "enter-net" news. If I actually listened and remembered all of it, there'd be a cap in my head right now.

[Prophet of Mike Zagurski 0]

My friend said that Wrestlemania used to be known as Hulkamania.

[Jingus 0]

This seems to be a common mistake among wrestling fans, but a friend of mine is absolutely convinced that the Undertaker of 1991 and the Undertaker of today are different actors. Other than that, I've heard of nothing even remotely close to the wacky claims apparently made by marks in that thread - where do you guys find these people?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

Never been to an indy show or talked to anyone at a wrestling event, have you?

 

The most common one are people who think that there was more than one Kane or Ultimate Warrior.

 

The funniest thing I've ever heard from a mark: "I know everything about wrestling."

[Big McLargeHuge 0]

Kids at school were convinced that WCW was real (as in shoot fighting) and WWF was fake. I have no idea how that came about.

[snuffbox 0]

The Warrior/Kane/Undertaker multi-people rumor seems to be eerily popular. Im sure Ive heard it from at least a few dozen people. I have no idea why its so popular.

[iggymcfly 0]

I actually used to believe the Taker one. I think it's just because he looked so different during the ministry era, that to people who didn't follow wrestling closely before that, he really did look like a different guy. If you see a clip from 1991, you can obviously tell that the facial features are the same, but if all you have is a distorted memory from a show you saw a couple times, he really does look like a different person.

[DCMaximo 0]

One of my friends tried to claim all wrestling was fake, except the title matches, which were real.

[Guest]

One of the most common that hasn't been mentioned. "Steve Austin and Goldberg are brothers".

[Jericholic82 0]

One of the most common that hasn't been mentioned.  "Steve Austin and Goldberg are brothers".

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hell I knew someone who tried to tell me that Sting and Warrior were brothers, and I believed him cuz I was young at the time.

[Guest wildpegasus]

The Warrior/Kane/Undertaker multi-people rumor seems to be eerily popular. Im sure Ive heard it from at least a few dozen people. I have no idea why its so popular.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

So very true. I've heard it from various people as well although I haven't heard people getting the warrior mixed up with the Taker and Kane.

[syxx2001 0]

I think it was the day after the nWo B&W/Wolfpack junk, so it would be Jan 5th, 1999? I was going into McDonalds before school and I overhear a bunch of kids from my school talking at their table and one goes "Konnan is gonna sue Kevin Nash so he cant use the Wolfpac music no more". I was a mark then still, but I knew that shit was true cause it sounded so stupid.

[Jericholic82 0]

Yknow the whole Fake Undertaker thing in 94 didnt really help the confusion.

[snuffbox 0]

Yknow the whole Fake Undertaker thing in 94 didnt really help the confusion.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

Especially if you have the IQ of aluminum.

[Guest cacheton]

I know this guy who had just come to Canada and Mean Gene was talking about Rick Martel's record for lasting in the Rumble. This guy ended up thinking Martel's name was "The Royal Rumble"

[TheFranchise 0]

I know this guy who had just come to Canada and Mean Gene was talking about Rick Martel's record for lasting in the Rumble. This guy ended up thinking Martel's name was "The Royal Rumble"

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

Maybe he can challenge for the title at Hulkamania

 

edit:

 

In a six pack challenge match against Kane, the Ultimate Warrior, Hulkamania and a couple of Undertakers.

[David Blazenwing 0]

A friend once told me that the current Kane is a new guy and the old Kane is wrestling as Abyss in TNA right now.

 

How does that explain the size difference? lol

 

Another fun time... RAW house show, early 2004, probably a week before the RR. Molly Holly is defending the Women's title against Lita, and the whole time, these two kids are sitting behind me and my friends screaming (literally, at the top of their lungs), "FUCK YOU MOLLY, YOU'RE A FUCKING WHORE, I HOPE YOU DIE, YOU FUCKING BITCH!" I turn around to say something to them (they were totally ruining the match, and a few people had already moved)... and they were two little four year old kids (couldn't have been more than four), sitting WITH their parents! I mean, damn, if I would have said anything like that around my parents at that age... well, it wouldn't have been pretty, that's for sure.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

just YESTERDAY someone asked me if Warrior had died. That was one long akward silence, followed by "No, he's not, but he did tie up Santa in S&M gear once."

 

I wish I had a camera for his reaction. Priceless.