IMPORTANT PIT-RELATED INFORMATION

[Your Paragon of Virtue 0]

I saw a homeless person the other day. I think I want to have unclean sex with him.

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I was driving home from work one day a few years ago and was sitting at a red light a couple of blocks from my apartment. There was a homeless lady standing on the corner holding a sign that said "Hungry."

 

I rolled down the window and said I'd take her to my place and cook her a meal if she gave me a blowjob.

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and?

[The Czech Republic 0]

Czech, did you ever capture Eagleman on video?

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http://www.alldumb.com/item/12479/

[sfaJack 0]

and?

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She stared at me for a moment and then said she could do it if I fed her and drove her to the nearby shelter later so she could sleep there.

 

I said, "Ha ha, no thanks. I was just joking. I don't want your nasty lips on my dick."

 

She flipped me off and then turned to panhandle the car behind me.

 

She actually wasn't half bad looking...but I mean, come on. Who knows where she's been?

[Ripper 0]

And you found that funny?

[The Czech Republic 0]

Ripper is either the conscience or the ACLU of this board, I don't know which.

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

Yeah. It would have been better if she just blew you and you didn't end up cooking for her.

 

A better way to deal with the homeless is when you see these bums standing in front of a McDonald's or similar store asking for money, you hand them either a job application for that place they're loitering at or a newspaper's want ads...

[sfaJack 0]

And you found that funny?

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In a "ha ha" way, yes. I wasn't ROTFLMAO all evening or anything.

 

I had a bad experience with a bum not long before that where my ex and I were going to Wendy's and a guy outside was asking for money so he could eat. So we bought him a combo meal (even though he kept insisting that we give him money instead) that he took about three bites out of before tossing it in the garbage, walking out of the place, getting in a car, and driving off.

 

I've been pretty unsympathetic to beggars since that day. One of my rare humanitarian moments...and that fucker pulled that shit.

[Ripper 0]

Yeah, but she asked for food and you to take her somewhere to sleep for the night. I mean, you want to fuck with crack whores, go right ahead, but goddamn.

[Slayer 0]

Yeah, leave Ripper's relatives alone!

[EL BRUJ0 0]

Candy paint drippin woodgrain I'm grippin

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Man, I hate that dude.

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...These niggaz don't undastand me cuz I'm Boss Hogg on candy...

[Sideburnious 0]

Why didn't sfaJack just wear a condom or give the bum some lip balm?

[MrRant 0]

Because he likes the feeling of cracked, dry and sore laden lips on him.

[Guest StylesMark]

Good lord you people are all dramatic about the internet.

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Agreed. Fuck the pit.

[Art Sandusky 0]

A post!

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Awesome.

[Art Sandusky 0]

I'm also always gone for a few days when this stuff happened. I certainly hope the FM apologists can finally admit I was right about the dude like, a year ago.

[Art Sandusky 0]

Holy crap, I called them apologists. That's not what I meant at all. I meant "FM-supporting morons."

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

I have Frigid blocked on AIM, yet I still like him more than a number of the people who posted in this thread.

[Slayer 0]

The great Inc-Slayer rivalry continues

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

What.

 

I haven't seen you on AIM in months. I changed my sn some time ago, so that might have something to do with it.

[Slayer 0]

I was kidding around.

 

I know you changed your SN, I just never asked for it since we only talked once in a blue moon anyway

[Guest Eagle Man]

If you see me online, don't talk to me. I don't even want to know you exist. I used to consider you a friend, but you're dead to me now.

[Guest Queen Leelee]

Why did you bump this?

[Guest]

This is "Clique A" business. Move along now.

[The Niggardly King 0]

...

[Guest Eagle Man]

Why did you bump this?

Quality Jingus.

[justsoyouknow 0]

If you talk about them, it gives them power. Like Freddy Kreuger.

[justsoyouknow 0]

The Pit threw a party.

 

The usual vaginas showed up.

[k thx 0]

I got halfway through page 2 before realising this was from two years ago.

[Carnival 0]

I got halfway through page 2 before realising this was from two years ago.

same here

 

and in that pic I totally got the mic, about to drop a hot verse.