Michael cole should be beaten with a sack of rocks

[Guest Youth N Asia]

How much does Michael Cole hurt Smackdown? JR's over the top babyface and "gawddamn you" antics are one thing...but Cole makes me want to go to a live show just so I could sit behind him and pop him in the head. I bet he just got his ass kicked all through school.

 

Smackdown...HHH pushes a ref into the ropes to knock Storm off...

 

COLE: "Wise move by HHH using the throwing the ref into the ropes..."

 

Now if Storm did that he'd say what a cheater he is...same as where him or JR would never call Lita on her run ins...but damn anyone that touched her.

 

Also on Smackdown he said "Rikishi moves like a cruiserweight"...TWICE.

 

I'd rather see Paul E and Tazz call the show

[Guest Human Fly]

I'd rather see Tajiri call a show. I say beat him with two sacks of rocks.

[Guest Youth N Asia]

Tajiri and Hurricane could call a hell of a show...I meant to type sake of oranges...but it wouldn't fit.

[Guest What?!]

I thought Cole was good....

 

When Austin beat him up and the front row fans were yelling "Kick his ass Austin"

[Guest Human Fly]

When Austin ripped Cole's shirt off he had that sissy jailhouse looking tat. You know Cole had been marked as someone's property.

[Guest Youth N Asia]

It was probably that jailbird Crush who made him his bitch in the can.

 

Fly...What...who had the Booker Lumberjack pic first?

[Guest Big McLargeHuge]

No, Michael Cole should be raped by a family of bears and then beaten with really sharp rocks.

[Guest]

Angles that need to be re-used:

 

 

Sumo Monster Trucks:  Push Michael Cole off of a tall building

 

The Yeti:  Have the Yeti and the Giant Double-Bearhug Cole

 

Snakeburgers:  Have Earthquake sit on him.

 

Buried Alive:  Bury Cole alive, and forget to resurect him

 

Austin's Cement truck:  Have SCSA bury Cole in cement

 

Austin gets run over:  Make Rikishi a hero by running over Cole

 

HHH falls 40 feet:  Put Cole in a car and drop it 40 feet

 

Chokeslam to Hell:  Have the Big show chokeslam him through the ring, and make sure he falls to Hell this time.

[Guest]

"OH MY GOD (SO AND SO) IS WITH (SO AND SO)!!!! WHAT THE HELL IS *HE* DOING HERE?!?!?  *WHAT* IS HIS CONNECTION WITH (SO AND SO)?!??!?!?!"

 

 

the worst was when he goes

 

"Oh that STACY....she's...she's a WITCH"

 

about stacy keibler.

 

is it wrong of me to dream of a fountain of blood sprinkling my shoulders coming from his lacerated neck?

[Guest]

Angles that need to be re-used:

 

 

Sumo Monster Trucks:  Push Michael Cole off of a tall building

 

The Yeti:  Have the Yeti and the Giant Double-Bearhug Cole

 

Snakeburgers:  Have Earthquake sit on him.

 

Buried Alive:  Bury Cole alive, and forget to resurect him

 

Austin's Cement truck:  Have SCSA bury Cole in cement

 

Austin gets run over:  Make Rikishi a hero by running over Cole

 

HHH falls 40 feet:  Put Cole in a car and drop it 40 feet

 

Chokeslam to Hell:  Have the Big show chokeslam him through the ring, and make sure he falls to Hell this time.

I have more:

 

 

Undertaker dies:  Have abunch of heels beat him up and throw him in a coffin.  Have Bud Bundy rise from the Tron to the ceiling.

 

Kane burns the coffin:  Light a coffin on fire with Cole in it and just forget to rescue him

 

Kane's powers:  Have Cole and Lawler sit together.  Kane should come out and make the table explode.

 

Nailz:  Have a prisoner come out and beat Cole for being an idiot.

[Guest Human Fly]

"Nailz:  Have a prisoner come out and beat Cole for being an idiot."

 

It wouldn't be Nailz it would be Crush. He would beat him for not helping him out when he was in the WWF like any good prison bitch should've. When Cole tries to answer with one of his dumb remarks Crush will slap the taste out of his mouth for sassing him.

[Guest What?!]

Fly...What...who had the Booker Lumberjack pic first?

Probably Fly, but I had to put it in my sig. Look at it! It rules all.

[BruteSquad_BRODY 0]

~Vintage~

[chuck415 0]

lolz.

[zhangmeijie 0]

So has cole gotton better or worse since his 2000 "Heydays".

 

Wait what am I thinking there is no better with Cole.

[Youth N Asia 0]

When I saw this I thought to myself "Didn't I start a similar thread..."

[Jingus 0]

So has cole gotton better or worse since his 2000 "Heydays".

 

Wait what am I thinking there is no better with Cole.

Folks from other countries, who didn't grow up speaking English naturally, might wonder if there's something about Michael Cole which they're missing due to issues of misunderstood translation or subtle cultural nuances. To which I say: no. He's just as big a dumbass to us as he is to you. He's improved in some ways since his awful early runs around 1999, but gotten worse in others, so the overall gain is zero.

[TheFranchise 0]

He's no JBL.

 

 

THE LIGHTS ARE ON BRIGHT!

[Jabroni 0]

Just thought I would add to this mighty internet testament of the fanbase's rage with Cole by saying, to any gamers out there, I have the Smackdown vs. Raw 2009 on Xbox 360, Micheal Cole literally sounds worse than any announcer or commentator I have ever heard. There is no excitement, there is very little recognition of what's going on in the match, the "jokes" fall flat every time, it's a terrible, awful mess and makes the matches slow and stagnant.

 

And when you perform a leg drop, he just says "There's Legdrop." Like Legdrop is the name of some mid-carder doing a run in. "There's Legdrop."

 

Plus he gave away the fucking PPV when Austin won his first title I believe it was, when there was a commercial between matches for WWEShopZone merchandise or something, it had an Austin shirt or something, a new one, and Cole said, "Get this amazing all new [item] of the BRAND NEW WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION CHAMPION!" or some such. This was a few matches before the main event and of course, Austin won that night. Fucking Cole.