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Guest Tzar Lysergic

The Master of Side Dishes Tournament

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Picnic Basket Free for All

 

 

4. Corn on the Cob

 

2. Baked Beans

 

 

Bread Bracket

 

1. Cheddar Biscuits

 

3. Hush Puppies

 

Taters!

 

 

4. Hash Browns

 

3. Onion Rings (battle for fryer supremacy)

 

Greens and Grains

 

4. Couscous

 

2. White Rice

 

 

 

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Y'know, were it specifically Velveeta shells and cheese, I'd probably vote for it against everything but the okra. I love that stuff.

 

Agreed. Far superior to the standard mac and cheese.

 

Picnic Basket Free for All

 

1. Cole slaw- Corn is good. Fuck the cob, though.

 

2. Baked Beans

 

Bread Bracket

 

1. Cheddar Biscuits

 

3. Hush Puppies

 

Taters!

 

4. Hash Browns

 

3. Onion Rings (battle for fryer supremacy)

 

Greens and Grains

 

4. Couscous- Both are gross. I voted for couscous because of the funny name.

 

2. White Rice- Never had okra. Never met anyone who's had okra. Never seen okra on a menu. Zucchini should have been in its place, anyway.

 

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Picnic Basket Free For All

 

4. Corn on the Cob

3. Mac and Cheese

 

Bread Bracket

 

1. Cheddar Biscuits

2. Garlic Bread

 

Taters!

 

1. Fuckin' Baked Potato

2. French Fries

 

Greens and Grains

 

1. Asparagus

2. White Rice

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Picnic Basket Free for All

 

Cole slaw

Mac and Cheese

 

Bread Bracket

 

Cheddar Biscuits

Garlic Bread

 

 

Taters!

 

Hash Browns

French Fries

 

 

Greens and Grains

 

Asparagus

Fried Okra

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So... I'm pretty fuckin' isolated w/r/t my unconditional love for white rice, huh?

 

White Rice is good, but shit man. OKRA!

 

 

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Guest Vitamin X

I personally like brown rice better, but I've never had okra thus my love for the white rice.

I've got nothing but love for mac and cheese but never in my life has it been considered a side dish, hence the vote for beans.

Same thing here.

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You guys who've never had okra need to do something about that, stat.

 

You probably won't see it on many menus... if you're down south/rural midwest, it's a homecooked thing, but you can get it frozen and it's still pretty good. Hometown Buffet/Country Buffet/Old Country Buffet often has it. They have collard greens and friend catfish and shit like that too. Even up here in nor cal. A rare treat.

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Guest Vitamin X

Oh I not only eat catfish and greens, I make that shit every now and then. Excellent food.

 

I'll look into how to make and eat it. There's plenty of southern food I've eaten and cooked. Hush puppies are bomb, for instance, and something I regret not nominating earlier.

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Picnic Basket Free for All

 

1. Cole slaw

vs

4. Corn on the Cob

 

2. Baked Beans

vs

3. Mac and Cheese

 

Bread Bracket

 

1. Cheddar Biscuits

vs

4. Cornbread

 

2. Garlic Bread

vs

3. Hush Puppies

 

Taters!

 

1. Fuckin' Baked Potato

vs.

4. Hash Browns

 

2. French Fries

vs.

3. Onion Rings (battle for fryer supremacy)

 

Greens and Grains

 

1. Asparagus

vs.

4. Couscous

2. White Rice

vs

3. Fried Okra

 

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Doesn't asparagus make your pee smell really bad? Fuck that shit.

 

Also, my votes reveal me as some sort of strange hybrid Southern good ol' boy/yuppie when it comes to taste in side dishes.

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Doesn't asparagus make your pee smell really bad? Fuck that shit.

Does that really matter as long as you don't piss your pants?

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4. Corn on the Cob

3. Mac and Cheese

1. Cheddar Biscuits (cornbread is not a side dish.)

2. Garlic Bread

4. Hash Browns

2. French Fries

4. Couscous (never had this, but after looking it up, it's pasta, and you can never go wrong with pasta.)

2. White Rice

 

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I cannot honestly understand how anyone could so much as enjoy the taste of cole slaw. I find it to be vile.

 

Depends on where you get it from. Some places have some nasty slaw. Surprisingly, the cole claw at KFC is excellent.

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Picnic Basket Free for All

 

 

4. Corn on the Cob

 

2. Baked Beans

 

Bread Bracket

 

 

4. Cornbread

 

 

3. Hush Puppies

 

Taters!

 

1. Fuckin' Baked Potato

 

 

2. French Fries

 

 

Greens and Grains

 

 

4. Couscous

 

 

3. Fried Okra

 

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I cannot honestly understand how anyone could so much as enjoy the taste of cole slaw. I find it to be vile.

 

Depends on where you get it from. Some places have some nasty slaw. Surprisingly, the cole claw at KFC is excellent.

 

This is a lie. All Cole Slaw is gross.

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Picnic Basket Free for All

 

1. Cole slaw

vs

4. Corn on the Cob

 

I can't get past the smell of cole slaw.

 

2. Baked Beans

vs

3. Mac and Cheese

 

M&C is a classic

 

Bread Bracket

 

1. Cheddar Biscuits

vs

4. Cornbread

 

Giving reasons is hard in a competition about food. I like the way cornbread tastes?

 

2. Garlic Bread

vs

3. Hush Puppies

 

Especially if there is marinara sauce handy.

 

Taters!

 

1. Fuckin' Baked Potato

vs.

4. Hash Browns

 

May very well win the whole thing

 

2. French Fries

vs.

3. Onion Rings (battle for fryer supremacy)

 

Tough bracket in that if you've ever been to a Burrger King you've undoubtedly gotten both at the same time on accident.

 

Greens and Grains

 

1. Asparagus

vs.

4. Couscous

 

Couscous is one of the four or five things included in every episode of 30 minute meals (couscous, chicken stock, grill seasoning, extraa virgin olive oil, and there's probably something else I'm missing she always uses) so I pick asparagus.

 

2. White Rice

vs

3. Fried Okra

 

The Tim Duncan of side dishes.

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I just don't understand the love for corn-on-the-cob. It takes too much effort to eat, always gets stuck in your teeth, isn't a filling side dish whatsoever....and maybe it's my taste buds, but I just don't think it tastes all that great.

 

And how anybody could vote for baked beans over macaroni and cheese is beyond me as well, but I'll save that for another post.

 

For the "too much effort to eat" part, they do sell the neat little gadet that shucks the corn off the cob in one easy swipe (its got handles on both ends and a round circle in the middle). If you're too cheap for that, a knife and a couple runs down the cob gets the same results.

 

Corn on the cob is vastly superior to any other form of corn available including frozen but definitely canned (I would never eat canned corn or any other canned veggies ever), especially if you get it local and not more than a day or two after it was picked. The sugar in the corn starts converting to regular starch rather fast after its picked off the stalk which makes it not nearly as sweet as when it was first picked.

 

And for a really good change, roast your corn on the cob (in the husks) in the oven at 350 degrees for 30 minutes which makes the corn even sweeter tasting than just boiling it to death (ugh). If you do that and tell me that it doesn't taste all that great I'll have to declare your taste buds dead.

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Guest College Party

Corn on the cob is hard to eat? You just eat it. I'm visualizing a gastronomical equivalent to Peter Griffin forgetting how to sit down.

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Why do they call it corn on the cob anyway? That's it's natural state. I don't cut off my arm and call it "Milky", then sew it back on and call it "Milky All Together".

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Never said it was hard to eat. I said it took a lot of effort. Have to use your teeth to chomp all the corn off from left to right, then up and down, constantly spinning the cob and rotating your mouth until you manage to extract all the kernels. And of course, there's always some you need to struggle with a lot more. Then, in the end, you have all these stray, stringy pieces stuck in your teeth. Not for me. Just give me a fork and let me get straight to it.

 

I haven't done the whole roasting bit though so maybe that would make the difference.

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That actually is a point. I had some corn on the cob last week and got a bit stuck in my teeth something fierce. To the point where I had to pull a piece of elastic out of my sock and floss with it.

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Guest Vitamin X

Marvin is on point with roasting it. I grab some corn from the farmer's market when it's in season (and otherwise of course, but this is the most local option obv.) and it tastes just absolutely amazing. You gotta brush it with butter (and bathe it in it, whatever you prefer) and a bit of salt, then wrap it in aluminum foil and do the aforementioned 350 degrees for 30 minutes (might be less than that from what I remember).

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Never said it was hard to eat. I said it took a lot of effort. Have to use your teeth to chomp all the corn off from left to right, then up and down, constantly spinning the cob and rotating your mouth until you manage to extract all the kernels. And of course, there's always some you need to struggle with a lot more. Then, in the end, you have all these stray, stringy pieces stuck in your teeth. Not for me. Just give me a fork and let me get straight to it.

 

I haven't done the whole roasting bit though so maybe that would make the difference.

I dont know many people past the age of like..9 who do that. Its much easier to cut off the corn with a knife and eat it that way.

 

Marvin is on point with roasting it. I grab some corn from the farmer's market when it's in season (and otherwise of course, but this is the most local option obv.) and it tastes just absolutely amazing. You gotta brush it with butter (and bathe it in it, whatever you prefer) and a bit of salt, then wrap it in aluminum foil and do the aforementioned 350 degrees for 30 minutes (might be less than that from what I remember).

While you could wrap it in foil, nature provides corn on the cob in its own ovenable vessel called the husk so theres no need for foil. Butter/salt/pepper can go on the corn after its roasted. Plus the husk imparts a bit its own flavor to the corn which is nice.

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Never said it was hard to eat. I said it took a lot of effort. Have to use your teeth to chomp all the corn off from left to right, then up and down, constantly spinning the cob and rotating your mouth until you manage to extract all the kernels. And of course, there's always some you need to struggle with a lot more. Then, in the end, you have all these stray, stringy pieces stuck in your teeth. Not for me. Just give me a fork and let me get straight to it.

 

I haven't done the whole roasting bit though so maybe that would make the difference.

I dont know many people past the age of like..9 who do that. Its much easier to cut off the corn with a knife and eat it that way.

Say what? Then it's not corn on the cob, it's just...corn.

 

I don't know anybody who cuts the corn off the cob before eating it.

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