Chuck Woolery

take a moment to fill out this survey to help you better know your swf companions! how exciting could this possibly be? ... well, who knows. Real Name: Characters Portrayed: In SWF Since: Real-Life Height: Real-Life Weight: Real-Life Age: Real-Life Location: Picture: Education: Accomplishments Outside of SWF: Favorite Band: Favorite Song: Favorite Movie: Virgin? Explain.: Accomplishments Within SWF: Favorite SWF Moment: Favorite SWF Writer (All-Time): Favorite SWF Writer (Current): Why You Joined The SWF: feel free to add questions, also... anyway, here's mine. Real Name: joseph peters Characters Portrayed: snow demon, jeremy miller, mike van siclen, quiz, calvin szechstein In SWF Since: a couple months after the original genesis. Real-Life Height: 6'1" on a good day Real-Life Weight: 187 Real-Life Age: 18 Real-Life Location: living in savannah, georgia; raised in littleton, new hampshire Picture: Education: freshman at savannah college of art and design, majoring in contemporary writing, minoring in film and television Accomplishments Outside of SWF: ugh. member of scad college republicans, played hockey until my junior year of high school (two state championship seasons, one with me as the captain). held the beer pong and beirut championship at the college for three weeks, and am currently an avid partier, with a side hobby writing student films for less creative people. Favorite Band: ying yang twins... i think i'm in the minority. Favorite Song: right now, "give it to me" by michael jackson and the youngbloodz... all-time, "yeah" by usher, lil' jon and ludacris. Favorite Movie: tie between mallrats and you, me and dupree Virgin? Explain.: lost it when i was fifteen to a chick i'd met on the internet. true story. not something i'm proud of. Accomplishments Within SWF: multiple-time tag champ and hardcore gamers' champ; won all three JL titles, the world title twice, and the first JL television champion. i'm most proud of my tag triangle storyline with zack and supes, as well as the legendary american gladiators match. Favorite SWF Moment: honestly? i was a huge xstasy mark, so him coming back and being moderately successful was the shit. Favorite SWF Writer (All-Time): xstasy, for reasons outlined above. Favorite SWF Writer (Current): my respect for wildchild grew enormously after i became head booker, and he's probably my favorite writer. Why You Joined The SWF: i had just discovered message boarding and vastly overrated my own skills as a writer, plus i was just getting into wrestling through the wrestling boom.

NON-TITLE MATCH Gabriel Drake© vs Ricky Barbosa - i'm thinking barbosa's gonna pull an upset here. don't ask me why. SWF INTERNATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP #1 CONTENDERSHIP Alan Clark© Vs Michael Stephens - by all means, this should be stephens. HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Insane Luchador Vs Jimmy the Doom © - jimmy the doom baby. IN THE HOUSE OF MARVELOUS: Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix! HARDCORE MATCH Matt "Insert Gimmick Here" Myers (with James "Insert Adjunct Gimmick Here" Matheson) vs. Zyon - remember when i said i loved where zyon's character was going? he needs to capitalize on that and do something stat. that said, myers should pick this one up. TAG TEAM ACTION JJ Johnson and Manson vs. Asia Underground (Michael Cross and Akira Kaibatsu) - asia underground kthx. SINGLES MATCH Johnny ‘the Barracuda’ Dangerous vs 'Cadillac' Calvin Szechstein - i'm thinking we're going to pull a split, but i don't know who's gonna win which NON-TITLE SINGLES MATCH Wildchild© vs Zack Malibu - see the last prediction.

what have i missed that can be addressed: - moving. when i first took over, one of the first things i discussed with tom was moving to another forum. we both looked a little bit, and we both came to the conclusion that this is the best option we have. we're an established presence here, and if you think we get disrespect from tsm for writing way too many words about wrestling matches, try selling that concept to a board we haven't been on for five and a half years and see what happens. tsm is an established message board presence -- go figure, i know -- and at least 50% of us are actively involved in it, whether it's zack and wildchild (who you see everywhere) or flik (who you see in video games all the time) or... i mean, for the most part we're all involved here and we're established here and it's giving up a lot for what, as manson said, is a lateral move at best. - changing the format of the fed. no. no, no, a thosuand times no, and i know i'm going to catch shit for putting it like that but any modifications to the model of the fed makes us just another e-fed and quite honestly, if i wanted just another e-fed i'd be a whole lot more active in the oaoast because they're already four steps ahead of us in building a strong "traditional" e-fed community. what makes this fed unique is its competition model; that said, i'll be the second (tom was the first) to say it's a double-edged sword. the writers here are amateur professionals at this point, and the only way for somebody to join the fed and be instantly competitive requires them to be 1) a good writer (rare), who is 2) interested in wrestling (incredibly rare; read the WWE folder for evidence) perhaps we've exhausted all the people who can be instantly competitive, and others don't want to put in the time to be competitive, but you know what? if the alternative is us becoming something we're not, i'm completely fine staying the way we are. - the swf community. this one hasn't been touched on yet, but i think it's worth noting because it seems like (to me) it's a big reason the place is failing. i'm friends with tom, zack and supes; i've had conversations with stephens and raynor and rando, though not recently; and wildchild and i have exchanged pm's a couple times and (if i'm remembering correctly) had heat with each other for a while. other than that, i haven't had a legit conversation with any of the current army, and that hurts my enthusiasm for it, a little bit. i like to think i'm a pretty approachable guy; my aim's gin and joseph and i love talking about the fed and i've got a pretty endearing personality, guys, i swear it. a big reason i stayed active early on was because of swf chat, but the last couple times i visited that it was drea chilling by herself, or munich chilling by himself, or drea and munich chilling by themselves. maybe an swf chat night to help us bond? i don't know, but (again) the oaoast has a constant dialogue going about storylines and the like, and their community is a lot stronger than ours and gets a lot more feedback, and that, to me, speaks volumes about why landon would rather write his oaoast match than his swf match. that's all i've got for now. i'm sure someone else will draw me back to this thread later.

i really don't think the fed right now is in awful shape, at least in the sense that it has been worse. i think what tom wants, and i agree with him, is to make sure that we go out the right way -- with strong main event players (stephens, landon and drake), a solid undercard (wild and dangerous, zack and myself, alan clark), and other people who can be thrown into matches. we have enough people right now to make the next few months interesting, if everyone can stay motivated, and with those extra writers doing one-off angles for the final genesis, we can send the fed off the right way, instead of the apathetic death we're heading to.

it has been a crazy run, and i'd much rather see us go out in a blaze of glory than have tom one day wake up with a storm that is complete no-shows and say, "fuck this, i'm done." i'd also love to see the fed make an amazing turnaround with plenty of new blood, but after being head of cc for a year and knowing how that works i'm not seeing that happening, though i'd love to be proven wrong. anyway, i came back to make the next six months some of the best in fed history, and i hope that we can accomplish that, whether it winds up being the final six months in fed history or not.

1912 new york giants. marquard and mathewson babay.

i'm not even wasted when i'm typiong tihgt. seriously. but i'm so so soooooooo excited.

"Yeah, Miranda, I'm almost at the airport, I was just calling to check in is all." The brick-red Cadillac Escalade is the scene, and Calvin Szechstein is the man talking, eyes focused on the Chicago roads as he conversates with his assistant. "Well, I'm glad Fred was pleased with our showing at Clusterfuck." "So it didn't bother him that we lost?" "No, it's not a big deal to me, either, it's just that Fred is the type of gentleman to get caught up in semantics." "Well, that's good, at least. I assume we lost the Alpha Dog sponsorship?" "Well, at least we got something to replace it." "Yeah... look, Miranda, I'm almost at the airport. Give me a call if anything comes up." *click* Szechstein parks the Cadillac in front of the airport, and before too long Zack Malibu opens the trunk, throwing his travel back in. "Hey, Zack." "Hey, Calvin. Thanks for picking me up." *slam!* Malibu opens the passanger side door, climbing into the Escalade as Calvin drives off. "Yeah, man, I really appreciate you not making a big deal out of me not being here all week." "It's nothing, Zack." "I had to fly to Toronto to do press for Anglemania, do the tour, grease some hands... you know the business, Cal." "Yeah." Quiet settles in on the Escalade, the sounds of Jack Johnson emoting through the vehicle, but Zack turns the volume down, speaking once more. "So when's our rematch?" Calvin appears caught off guard. "What rematch?" "Uh, our rematch with Wild and Dangerous? I know you've been out of the business for a couple years, Calvin, but you know we're entitled to a rematch after the way things ended at Clusterfuck." "Uh... why?" "What do you mean, why?" "Zack, we lost. They're the better team. Let's move on." It's Zack's turn to be caught off guard. "What?" "Zack, it's not a big deal. There's what, three tag teams in this federation? We'll see them again." "Absolutely not, Calvin. This is a huge deal." "I'm sorry, I'm not making the connection." “HE’S GOT HIM!” King shouts as the audience lets out a booming cheer… but before the Caribbean can secure the cradle, Calvin rolls through, taking Wildchild with him and pinning his shoulders to the mat instead! Everyone’s mouth drops in shock and Herrington drops to count for: ONE! Johnny barely sees the pin in time and he scrambles towards the ring, “-and the Barracuda just dove into the ring, under the bottom rope!” shouts Francis. “He’s going to try and break up this pin but I don’t think he can get there in time!” TWO! Johnny jumps to his feet and sprints towards Calvin! Szechstein sees him but just closes his eyes, knowing that he’ll take a hit…but the match is his! THREEEEEEEEEE! *CRACK!* “YEAAAAAAAAAAH!” Herrington nearly pulls his arm out of his socket trying to stop the count, and he does with his hand hovering a centimeter over the canvas when Johnny scrambles into the ring , jumps up and lands a basement dropkick into Calvin Szechstein’s jaw to the joy of thirty thousand! “HE GOT THERE! JOHNNY MADE IT IN THE NICK OF TIME!” Calvin, stunned, falls backwards from the hit and Wildchild rolls through! Once more Wildchild finds himself on the right side of a rolling cradle for the pin only this time he secures it, bridging backwards as the referee counts and Johnny stands idly, counting with Herrington and the crowd for: ONE! TWO! THREEEEEEEEEE! DING! DING! DING! “YEAAAAAAAAAAH!” Wild and Dangerous head out of the ring and start making their way towards backstage. Tonight they beat a team that everyone said they should…and now they feel like they can focus on the one item that this team made their legacy with—the SWF Tag Team Championship… The Cadillac Boys, on the other hand, continue to glare bitterly towards the forms of their retreating opponents… "Listen, Calvin. I understand that you're not a wrestler, and I understand that this team might not be the most important thing to you..." "Hold on, Zack." "No, you hold on, Calvin. If you have any pride left, you'll understand where I'm coming from when I say that me and you, as a team, are so much more than a stepping stone, Calvin." "... well, I don't understand." "We were set up to fail, Calvin! Don't you see this? They gave us our wins and then they fed us to the wolves. They knew that I wrestled the most important match of my life three days prior, and they knew I won the Lethal Rumble, and they made sure to book us against their boys three days later so that Wild and Dangerous could look so good, vanquishing those nasty OAOASTers on their way to their fifth tag title reign." "As logical as that sounds." "But they aren't that good, Calvin. There's more to the wrestling world than the SWF, and let's be honest with each other, I wasn't all there. With me having two weeks to rest, and you being, well, you." "Why don't you stop making excuses, Zack?" Again with the caught-off-guard. "Excuse me?" "It doesn't matter if you're all there or not. You were paid to wrestle on January 31st against Wild and Dangerous, you showed up, and you lost. If you were in that bad of shape where you shouldn't have been wrestling, why even show up?" "Calvin..." "Besides, Landon came in second in the Lethal Rumble, and he was alive enough to win the Clusterfuck..." "CALVIN." "Uh uh, Zack, if you get your tirade I get mine too. You need to man up--yeah, Zack, man up--and accept that you lost." Zack swallows this, eyeing Calvin, whose focus is still on the road first and foremost. Finally, in almost a whisper, Zack says, "I can accept that I lost, Calvin." "Thank you." "But I'm a fighter, and if somebody beats me and takes a little bit of my pride, I've got to get it back. I want that rematch, Calvin, And you need to man up and get your pride back. You're the one who got robbed of a pinfall, not me." Calvin, finally, looks over at Zack. "You're not gonna give this up, are you?" "No." Calvin sighs. "I'll see what I can do." FADE TO BLACK.

so, uh, this show's coming to you live from the allstate arena in rosemont, illinois, right? right.

anyone know why they keep booing muhammad, or is it like a chant or something? seems like everytime he does something he's getting booed.

final count was 6.5k. quality over quantity, i guess, although with twice as many words you'd only need half the quality? i've always wanted to beat wild and dangerous, so maybe tonight's the night.

12k? yeah, i wanted to do a hot spotfest of an opening match, but we'll probably top out at 7k. ... 12k? jesus, kiddo.

quick bullet points from me. - the jj/gabe storyline seems a little weak to me. i don't know, i understand jj wants the title, but i don't feel like there's enough hatred or even tension between the two to warrant a pull-apart brawl. like jj pointed out in the promo, gabe hasn't shown that he's too interested in the title match (in-character), and as such the hype for the match isn't hitting as hard as i wish it was. - LOVE the zyon storyline. it works so perfect with his character, given all the buildup it's had, and if he wins the clusterfuck -- or even throws out stephens, somehow -- it'd do a LOT for his character. i'm not gonna lie, it should be a tour de force when he turns heel. - and then, honestly the reason i started this thread, i wasn't sure if i got johnson's character right in our match; i picked up from his stats that he's a shit-talker in the ring and i kind of ran with that, but i was feeling like i might have botched his character completely.

that maneater remix is ridiculous. i wish i could get past the fucking firewall here so i could just limewire hot remixes.

does johnny have stats in the new thread that i'm missing?

i hate agreeing with czech but seriously, some of you people need to shut the fuck up and actually watch a game instead of skimming the tsmthreads to figure out what's going on in the nfl. the colts rode a resurgent defence and their offence to the super bowl; the bears rode their defence and grossman made some plays (YES HE ACTUALLY MAKES PLAYS) and benson rushed like a beast and they had an entire drive handing it to thomas jones that ended in a touchdown en route to winning 39-14. i'd imagine they have a running game.

well -- i can honestly say that i never thought the colts would beat the patriots. props to them for doing it... but, i mean, they damn sure better win the super bowl now.

so this is pretty much exactly what i expected; the bears coming out and responding to the negative press and making a statement at the expense of the saints. i would love to see this turn into a patriots/colts style rivalry, though i don't know how likely that is. i'd settle for a rematch in the playoffs next year.

tag stats are in with mine, johnny; i'll bug zack about putting his stats up in the swf thread but if you need them now, they're the first set of stats in the oaoast stats post.

jesus christ, that's some ball control.

"I'm sorry, Calvin, I don't see the big problem here." "Well, you wouldn't," hisses Calvin Szechstein into a cell phone, standing by an enormous statue of Dolly Parton at the Country Music Hall of Fame in Nashville, Tennessee. He's obviously en route to Atlanta, and he's obviously trying to avoid being heard. "Fred, I've been trying to call you for two weeks and you've consistently blown off my phone calls. You know what that makes me think? That you know exactly what the big problem is and you just don't want to address it." "Calvin, you boys are 2-0, our sponsors are happy, Zack is working out perfectly... can't you be professional?" "Don't question my professionalism," snarls Calvin. "I'm being a perfect God damned gentleman and you know that. I'm just questioning why you would stick me with Zack when you know -- you KNOW, Fred, that I don't like him." "You know why, Calvin? Because Zack is popular and you, my friend, aren't always the most likable person on earth. We need Zack to get them to love you and we need you to get our point across and you need to realize that this isn't the OAOAST and we can't be successful with the Calvin Szechstein Show, do you understand me?" Calvin looks ready to blow his top, but Zack Malibu appears beside him, a smile on his face. "Have you seen this Elvis exhibit yet? Dude was a legend." Calvin raises a finger. "Yeah, Mr. Business, I've got you." "You've got to make this sacrifice for the best interests of Island in the Sun Marketing. Think about the money you're going to make, and I think you'll be all right. Have a good day." "You too, Mr. Business." *click* Calvin snaps his phone shut and looks over at Zack. "Elvis?" "Elvis Presley, the King, man. Don't play dumb with me, I know you've heard of him." "Oh, yeah, 'Heartbreak Hotel'... he's pretty good." The two men wander through the Country Music Hall of Fame, not really making conversation, just walking and observing, when Zack lobs up a softball. "Did you hear about the Clusterfuck card yet?" "Not yet." More awkward silence. "Did Flesher call you?" "Yeah. We're both in the 'Fuck." "Cool." "But, ah... we're also tagging against Wild and Dangerous." "Really?" "Yeah... I'm pretty excited for it, honestly. I mean, beating the Predators was nice, but Alan and Ricky doesn't mean a whole lot in the grand scheme of things... winning this week would be nice, beating JJ and all, but Wild and Dangerous?" "Mmmhmmm." "That'd be the pinnacle, honestly, Calvin. That's a legacy, there's no tag team in OAOAST like Wild and Dangerous, you know that." "Yeah." Zack quiets, obviously not much appreciating the one-word answers. "Well, if we're going to win the Tag Team Championships, beating Wild and Dangerous is a huge step in that direction, right?" "It is." "So let's do it." "Yeah." Calvin and Zack pound fists, but it doesn't take a narrator to tell you what's going on. FADE TO BLACK.

but, as someone who just declared as a contemporary writing major, i'm curious as to how many of you write something substantial beyond the swf. i seem to remember clark having a novella/novel about walt disney as god that i didn't think was a horrible idea, and edwin's a writer and i think supes is too, but there's a lot of guys here now who i'm not all that familiar with and i'm curious about them. feel free to post snippets or entire stories here, as i'm sure i'm not the only one who'd be interested in reading them.

asante samuel says hello.

have any of you guys heard the new michael jackson/youngbloodz collabo? it's called "give it to me" and i'm not gonna lie, i love it.

i don't care what anyone says, indianapolis/new england for the afc championship always gets me wet.