Kaertos

Grand Slam Mark Stevens walks to his office door and sighs, as the door swings slightly off it’s hinges. The Heavy Hitter strides into his backstage office and… Grand Slam: THE HELL?!?… …surveys the carnage. His answer phone is bleeping, as it sits on the floor, on a desk split in two. Paper work lies all around the room, covered in dirt from three or four smashed Aecas brand plant pots. The whole place looks like it’s been gone over with… Grand Slam: My baseball bats…. …two of Grand Slam’s Baseball Bats, lying on the floor, splinters of wood and shattered glass coming from them. The Heavy Hitter sighs and idly kicks his answering machine away from some paperwork which he begins to sift through. Answer Phone: *beep* you have… one… new message Va’aiga: WHAT’S MY NAME??

James Matheson takes a slow walk down from the ring and takes a seat beside Bobby Riley and Cyclone Comet at the announce table. Comet gives the camera a pained look as he introduces the next match. Comet: Well we open up here with what could be a classic encounter as former ICTV champion Xstasy faces the man who we just saw… The Maori Monster Va’aiga. Riley: I don’t think there’s going to be any problem here for the Maori. Matheson: It’s my qualified legal opinion that this is gonna be a BUTT-whoopin’, Bobby. Comet: Are you actually legally qualified, Citizen Matheson? Matheson: Well Va’aiga hired me as a legal advisor and are YOU going to argue with his choice? Funyon: Ladies and gentlemen, already in the ring the first participation in this one fall match. Weighing in at 309lbs and hailing from Rotorua on Aetearoa,… this is the Maori Badass. VAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA’AAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGAAAAAAAAAA. Funyon pauses and Va’aiga gives him a glare Funyon: TOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEEEEPOLLLLLLLOHHHHHHHTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO … AND I WANT YOU!!!! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM A huge explosion and a BLINDING shower of white sparks come from the entryway as the dreadlocked figure stands silhouetted in its midst! YOU ARE THE PERFECT DRUG… THE PERFECT DRUG… THE PERFECT DRUG! Funyon: And his opponent hailing from The Nation’s Capital and Weighing in at 211… ..and Funyon is stopped in mid sentence with Va’aiga standing in the ring waiting for the X, Xstasy rushes out through the cloud of sparks and heads on down to the ring full steam, sliding head first under the bottom rope. Va’aiga bearly has time to turn as X leaps at him and fires off a rapid set of kicks to the shin, thigh and side. Va’aiga steps sideways, driven a little by the force of the blows and Xstasy rolls backwards and crosses his arms over his head, earning a solid round of applause form the crowd. Xstasy ties his hair back and Va’aiga takes a deep breath and quickly regains his composure. Comet: Xstasy coming out of the gates like a shot from a 45. I think given the accusations Va’aiga was throwing around I’d be steamed too. Matheson: Xstasy is using his speed because that’s all he has. It’s my professional opinion that if Va’aiga catches him, Xstasy is screwed. The Perfect Drug approaches Va’aiga side on dancing backwards and forwards, dodging a couple of wildly thrown jabs from the Maori Badass. Another pair of sniper like kicks makes Va’aiga stagger forwards, as X gets in close enough to wrap a roundhouse round the back of the Maori’s thigh. X rushes against the ropes and rebounds off, taking the Maori Badass down with a face crusher. X throws another pose to the crowd and adjusts his hair tie again as Va’aiga stands back up. Riley: Come on Va’aiga… show this punk what it means to be a PROPER wrestler. Matheson: I have full confidence that Mr Tu’ipolotu is going to succeed fully. Comet: Twoehpowhat? Riley: You mean you don’t know his name? Have you ANY idea how much trouble that could get you into, Comet? Matheson: It’s my professional opinion you’d wind up on a slab somewhere. Waiting on Va’aiga, X dances backwards and forwards in his Capoeira stance and tests Va’aiga’s reactions by swinging a lazy back leg crescent kick. The Maori is forced to Maori duck and X follows that with a lightning fast Capoeira spin kick, knocking the Maori Badass rudely off his feet. For a coup de grace The Perfect Drug adds a standing moonsault, showing off his altheticism. Comet: I’m blown away by the fast start to this match from Xstasy. I’m not sure the Maori knows what to do with the fiery X. Riley: X does have to concentrate on not being caught. Matheson: One shot from Mr. Tu’ipolotu and that dreadlocked idiot there is going DOWN. Leaping up to his feet again, X looks at Va’aiga and waits, watching for when the Maori is in range for any of his stylish kicks. Va’aiga stumbles upwards and X again lashes out with a series of stiff blows - leg, leg, body, leg, head and Va’aiga is left a little dazed and confused. Xstasy charges in and fires off the Upstar Slap into Va’aiga chest and for his troubles gets whipped sharpish over V’aaiga’s head with a lightning belly to belly Suplex! Va’aiga: BOO-YAH! With a disdainful downwards glance the Maori Badass ends down and drags up Xstasy, whipping him hard into the ropes. The Maori waits the second or two it takes to for X to get back to him behind snapping him over with a wheel powerslam! V’aaiga holds on to cover and Eddy Long drops to count… ONE! TWO! TH.. and Xstasy kicks out. Riley: Look at the impact on that powerslam, Comet. Matheson: That’s the sort of high impact offense you can expect from the Maori Badass. A frustrated Va’aiga flashes a glare at Eddy Long as he stands, bringing Xstasy up with him. Another hard whip sends the X into the corner of the ring, and Va’aiga follows in with rapid shoulder first charges, spearing the poor dreadlocked grappler into the corner post. Riley: That’ll knock the wind out of your system. The temporary relief for Xstasy as Va’aiga quits driving his shoulder into X’s ribcage quickly transforms to sheer pain as the Maori grabs the X, throws him over his shoulder and slams the Perfect Drug down hard into the canvas. Va’aiga drops down and flips Xstasy over easy before grabbing for his legs and wrenching in a tight Boston Crab. Comet: The old Boston Crab. Is this part of a revolutionary new strategy for the Maori Citizen Matheson? Matheson: Va’aiga is winning by any means he chooses. I’m DAMN sure he knows what he’s doing. Va’aiga leans back and growls through clenched teeth as he tries to pump up the pressure on Xstasy’s legs and lower back. Xstasy wiggles a little freer and Va’aiga has to adjust position slightly to prevent the X from breaking loose. The crowd busts out into an “X-STA-SEE!” chant and the X responds by maneuvering feverishly in Va’aiga’s hold, trying to squirm free. Riley: I’ve been in one of them. That’s a painful move, Comet. That’s a REAL painful move. Comet: I’ve been an active wrestler too, Robert. I am aware of these things. Xtasy lets out a little scream of tension as he makes one last hue effort and WITH A JERK OF HIS BODY SNAPS HIS WAY OUT OF THE HOLD! The X leaps to his feet and rushes the ropes, rebounding and screaming towards the Maori Badass who watches X hurtle at him and ducks under the charging cruiserweight. X holds onto the ropes to prevent him from careering back towards the Maori Badass but the crowd boos as Va’aiga takes a big Maori step forwards and flings Xstasy over his head with a German Suplex! The crowd noise dies a little and back at the announce table Matheson turns round and pantomimes a shhhhh! Riley: That’s the way to keep the morons shut up. Comet: These fans pay your wages Riley! Riley: My wages are paid by the SWF directors. There’s no “Bobby Riley” shirt, so I don’t get much from those sad cases of humanity at all. Va’aiga on the mat holds on to the back waistlock and slowly stands, rolling through his German and setting up another one by backing into the ring ropes, and looking out into the crowd, backed up near the ring ropes Va’aiga launches Xstasy OVER the ropes with a release German Suplex! BUT X FLIPS OUT OF THE MOVE AND LANDS ON HIS FEET! XSTASY SLINGSHOTS BACK INTO THE RING AND TAKES THE MAORI DOWN WITH A BULLDOG! Xstasy covers… ONE! TWO! T… and Va’aiga kicks out. Comet: Wow. That’s a huge move from Va’aiga and a huger counter from Xstasy. Riley: That guy does more somersaults than anyone else in the federation. Matheson: Leave tumblers for the circus. There’s nothing that beats a solid bearhug. Xstasy throws the X sign to the crowd again as Va’aiga regains his vertical base. X looks to soften Va’aiga up and throws a ridge hand chop at the Maori Badass, and Va’aiga just stands there and glares at Xstasy. Another chop, another glare. A third chop and Va’aiga BLASTS Xstasy backwards with a left cross out of nowhere! Riley: Is there any stopping Va’aiga? He’s like a brick wall against all the best efforts of Xstasy Matheson: No. There isn’t. Put firmly on his back foot Xstasy tries a Capoeira weave to avoid V’aiga, but the Maori fires a second left cross, then rapidly for a third before taking a step backwards, kissing his right fist and sending Xstasy FLYING down to the mat with a massive right hook. Va’aiga: BOO-YAH! Riley: Va’aiga: 100% of your recommended daily amount of Boo-yah! Va’aiga looks up the entrance ramp where a pair of large figures are casting shadows into shot, before turning his attention back to the X. Va’aiga grabs down and hoists X into a standing head scissors, looking around the crowd before levering X onto his shoulders. Xstasy shakes his head furiously and tries to counter, maybe into a headscissors or a huracanrana, but it’s all academic as Va’aiga SMEARS XSTASY ACROSS THE CAVAS WITH A POWERBOMB! Matheson: Mr Matthews move is very effective in the Maori’s hands, am I right? Comet: Your assessment is correct Citizen Matheson. The crowd noise builds with the collective sound of booing as out of the entrance gate step John Duran and Charlie Matthews. Duran strides confidently towards the ring and looks up towards the action while the Grappler takes his time getting down to ringside. Both men look like they’ve been exercising or something similar… small hints of physical exertion show through. Comet: Duran? Grappler? This isn’t a handicap match! This is an OUTRAGE! Matheson: Sometimes in life you have to make a statement, Comet. This is our time. Riley: I agree James, this could be the start of something big! Va’aiga rears back his arm and the hush of anticipation settles around the arena, as Va’aiga clearly signals for… Riley: THE LARIAT! …before charging headlong at the Perfect Drug and extending his arm… but with his last gasp of energy X ducks and spins round into a Capoeira Sweep! Va’aiga drops to the mat as Xstasy lays on the mat collapsed. The crowd noise builds with a chant of “X! X! X!” speeding slowly up as The X hauls himself up to his feet. Va’aiga crawls up to his knees as Xstasy charges and BLASTS VA’AIGA IN THE FACE WITH A SHINING CAPOERIA SIDE KICK! Va’iga flops to themat as Xstasy covers. Comet: OH MY GOD! WHAT A MOVE! That HAS to be it for the Maori. Eddy Long drops as Xstasy quickly covers… ONE! TWO! THRE… no and Va’aiga kicks out. Riley: Never rule out big old Va’aiga. Comet: Close call, and the X is getting all fired up. Riley: Xstasy… fired… there’s an interesting thought. Comet: That’s just uncharitable. Xstasy gets back to his feet and snatches at Va’aiga, dragging the Maori up to his feet. Xstasy leaps up onto Va’aiga’s shoulders and rains down a blitz of blows before throwing his body backwards and spiking Va’aiga down to the mat. Comet: XDDT! Xstasy is on the comeback trail. Concerned at the recent comeback of Xstasy, Duran and Grappler hop onto the ring apron. Xstasy rushes blindly towards them, and leaps at the second rope looking for a quebrada style moonsault, but Duran snatches the rope away from him and Grappler makes a grab… but Xstasy does a backward roll out of Grapplers reach and rolls up to a vertical base, hitting a standing moonsault on the downed Maori!! That gets a little “HOLY SHIT!” chant! Eddy Long drops to count… ONE! TWO! THR… and Xstasy gets back to his feet quickly as Eddy Long stays down looking at Va’aiga. Comet: Holy smoke indeed! Va’aiga gets flattened by an AMAZING aerial technique from Xsatsy! Looking down at Va’aiga who is lying starfished on the mat, Xstasy looks out into the crowd and hops up onto the second rope Eddy Long checks on Va’aiga and puts a KO count on the downed Maori, but with the referee’s attention focused away from Va’aiga’s allies, John Duran and Charlie Matthews take the opportunity to strike! Rushing into the ring ropes Duran dislodges Xstasy who was busy throwing his hair tie into the crowd and the talented Capoeira expert falls crotch first onto the top turnbuckle. Riley: Ouch! Comet: Look at that blatant cheating. Matheson: Strictly speaking it’s only cheating if a penalty is enforced. Riley: So in your professional opinion; If the ref didn’t see it it didn’t happen! Matheson: Yes. Va’aiga hauls himself up to his feet, Eddy Long having broken the count, distracted by the crashing of X to the mat. Va’aiga quickly grabs X and sets him up Suplex style, hoisting the X over his shoulder before falling sideways and SMASHING XSTASY DOWN TO THE MAT WITH THE SOUTHERN LIGHTS BOMB! Va’aiga drops to cover… ONE! TWO! THR.. and somehow someway Xstasy finds the effort to roll his shoulder off the mat. Riley: That was three! That was the win! Matheson: I agree. Comet: OF COURSE YOU AGREE - YOU “REPRESENT” HIM!!! Riley: Whoah, ease up on the coffee there Comet! Smirking confidently to himself and abosirbing the boos of the crowd by ignoring them, Va’aiga takes a slow walk over to the still hurting Xstasy and hoists him up by the hair, and while X is stumbling the big Maori backs off a few steps and adjusts his arm pad. Riley: He’s going for the lariat! But Va’aiga stops in mid motion as John Duran shakes his head, and the big Maori spots it. Va’aiga throws a puzzled look out to his tag team partner, and Duran responds with an Agent Smith-esque crooked smile and a symbolic slash of the throat sign. Comet: What in the name of all that’s good is this? Matheson: Duran just made an executive decision… …and Va’aiga grabs Xstasy by the arm and crosses the Perfect Drug’s arm across his own throat. The crowd boos furiously and the odd scattered scream or cry of “NO!” echoes through the arena. Ignoring these catcalls Va’aiga steps forwards and racks up The X on his shoulders, all the time choking out the unfortunate rising star with his own arm. Va’aiga takes in a deep breath and drops to a side DROPPING XSTASY RIGHT SLAP BANG ON THE TOP OF HIS GOD DAMN HEAD!!! That gets a mixture of boos and a massive “HOLY SHIT!” Riley: The Va’aiga Stinger! Good LORD Xstasy looks like he’s been broken in half. Comet: That might have been unnecessary, Matheson. Matheson: It got the win for the Maori. It was necessary. Excuse me gentlemen. Matheson walks away from the commentary table and joins up with the three wrestlers now all standing outside the ring. Va’aiga gives a passing glance back at the still laying X as the four walk away from the ring. Comet: Well we have a winner in Va’aiga, and maybe this new alliance’s period of domination is beginning. Stryke vs Craven is next up, and we’ll be back after these advertisements.

I'm going to make a copy of "Go Home" available tonight after the show goes up, I think. I'll e-mail it to you or Dace. I have a copy of Love Rollercoaster also.

Two things to say here--- 1.) If someone were to make these CD and send it to me, I would think very highly of you. This looks awesome. 2.) I'm wondering where my entrance is (I guess when people found out it was a cheesy baseball song it lost popularity) and I beg for the inclusion of the all time greatest entrance music ever --> Midnight Carnival - "Love Rollercoaster" by Red Hot Chili Peppers

I have Raynor's matches so the show will be up by 5:30 at the latest. Card to follow promptly.

Well friends, it is 1:30 AM Eastern and I am still missing two matches to post the show. Thus, it will be up tomorrow evening as soon as I get home from work with the Smarkdown card to follow. I am sorry to do this, but I can't stay up as I have to be up by 6:00 AM for work. Besides, from what I have read of the show, it is well worth waiting for.

When I was a kid, it was the very end of the Big Red Machine. These guys were my heroes. Bench, Rose, Concepcion, Griffey, Geronimo, Perez... all of the. But Rose and Bench shone brighter than the others to me. When Rose came back to manage the Reds, I was thrilled. I remember sitting in a Ponderosa listening to his first game back on a transistor radio. When I heard the allegations, I was stunned and in denial for a long time. As I got older and bothered to actually read the Dowd report, I realized that he did, in fact, bet on baseball. Honestly, I was crushed. But I still wanted him in the HoF. Now? Screw him. He lied to me. For 15 years, he lied to me. Nobody in the past two decades has done more to undermine the game of baseball than Rose. His selfish me-first attitude and grating public persona have turned me from one of the mindless Rose worshipping sheep into an actual Rose hater. Pete Rose was a great baseball player. I will not deny that. But he does not belong in the Hall of Fame. He broke the one rule of baseball that is hung on the wall in every single clubhouse since the Black Sox scandal. Do not bet on baseball. To hell with him. I am sick of hearing about him.

"Home" and "Go Home" are not the same thing at all. "Go Home" is a song written especially for the Cincinnati Reds and Great American Ballpark. In fact, I think it is one of like two songs on the album that doesn't specifically reference the Reds. Lyrics? Well, since you asked nicely, here is the chorus: Go Home! You're Done. Hit the showers. Thanks for the runs. You Bum! You got rocked. Just beat it. You got the hook. Go Home! More... well, I guess so... Hey pitcher well I guess that was your fastball. I don't know if you could get it past my grandma. Are you wondering if this was just a bad dream? Think about it on your way back to the farm team. And that's all I can remember off the top of my head.

I'll see if I can hook anyone who really cares up with a copy.

... Wow ... I am impressed...

As a CC request... I at least would look fondly upon the individual who collects all of the info in this thread into one post so we can add it to some of the other info and consolidate some pinned threads...

This causes me to wonder if anyone has actually heard my Blessid Union of Souls entrance?

Very nice Judge. Maybe in some fantasy universe, Grand Slam and Judge could be an "old guys" tag team and show all these youngsters how it is done. I like the story very much, and I think it makes Judge that much more a real person. Way to go.

Yup, and that blackout on the dish works for all of the "season ticket" programs. I called Time-Warner and asked them about the baseball package because they were having a sale and I could get the whole year for like $100. All I asked was could I get all of the Reds games, when they said no, I said I wasn't interested. I understand the theory behind the blackout on free, nationally televised games. I'm not saying i agree with it, but I understand it. But if I am dropping big cash on a "season ticket" program, I should be able to see any freaking game I like.

Yeah, but isn't the travel thing part of why they have divisions that are geographic? Besides, nobody has a problem with Green Bay, Chicago, Minnesota and Detroit in the same division. In fact, I think it is one of the best division, rivalry-wise, in the NFL.

The best acting jobs in the movies were turned in by Sir Ian McKellan as Gandalf and Sean Astin as Sam. Hands down, no contest. Viggo as Aragorn is close, but some of his stuff rang a little hollow to me in the first two. Tremendous job in the third one however.

No Dames... they didn't. It didn't seem that silly to me. It was a nice way to show that Legolas realized what was happening and showed his understanding of the suicidal nature of the march.

Here's a rivalry that I personally find interesting. The Bengals/Browns/Steelers triangle. If you ask someone in Cincinnati who their biggest rival is, they'll say the Browns. Ask someone in Cleveland and they'll say the Steelers. Which is not to say Cincy likes the Steelers or the Brownies like the Bengals, but it isn't a rivalry. I think the NFL missed a great opportunity to start a new rivalry between the Bengals and the Colts by putting Baltimore in the AFC North and Indy in the AFC South.

My quick thought on your match Thugg? You made Mak look like the toughest man in the Fed with the ending. I lost track of how many Finishers you nailed him with. This match was a good example of putting your opponent over and still winning the match. I liked it.

King has been having some computer issues that have not allowed him to get online recently. He wanted me to assure you that he will be here for the PPV, and that he will answer all of his PMs. However, if it is something of crucial, immediate importance, PM me or Z. Oh, and Va'aiga, he told me to tell you that he promises he will answer your PM.

Simply awesome Janus... I love it. In fact, I will be downloading the .mp3 to keep for posterity. Very, very nice. ::Schedules Janus for a Word Title Defense at G5::

Save me from the Venom fan boys. I liked the character in his first appearance, but never understood why he was so popular. In fact, I actively disliked him. Oh well, I hope they stick to some of Spidey's classic villians for the first few movies and keep the hard-to-explain Venom and even-harder-to-explain (and frankly annoying) Carnage as far away from the films as possible. I'd love to see Lizard, Electro, Sandman, Kraven, or Chameleon.

I am very disappointed in eveyone who comes right out and says they are not writing a match because they don't like the stip. I had a whole lot more written, but I deleted it because I don't want to cause trouble, and I doubt anyone cares to hear my thoughts on the matter.

"Ladies and gentlemen, up next is tonight’s MAIN EVENT!” Funyon stands center ring, grabbing everyone’s attention. “The following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL…” So do you wanna’ be a Franchise… And live large… A big house… five cars… “Making his way to ringside,” shouts Funyon, as the wispy sounds of a digital xylophone echo throughout the arena; a deep background beat, cleverly created by violins, and slightly overshadowing the original background rhythm. As the opening lyrics from Mak Francis’ Rock Superstar remix continue to blare over the PA system, the crowd bursts out of their seats, in recognition of the all too familiar music! The rent charge… Comin’ up in the world, don’t trust nobody… Gotta’ look over your shoulder constantly! The SmarkTron flares up with a blue and white photonegative image of Mak Francis, which is followed by ‘The Franchise’ in large green lettering flashing on the screen in time with the beat, interspersed with signature spots and clips of Francis’ trademark smirking pose. After stepping out from behind the curtain and down the ramp, Mak tilts his shades down on the bridge of his nose, smirking… looking left, then right, soaking up the crowds’ reaction… I remember the days, when I was a young kid grownin’ up… Lookin’ in the mirror dreamin’ about blowin’ up! *PWI-SHEW! PWI-SHEW! PWI-SHEW! PWI-SHEEEEEEW!!* He readjusts his shades with a smirk, slowly strolling down to ringside. After walking up the ring steps, he cockily wipes his feet on the apron, giving a salute to the crowd, before entering through the middle ropes. Mak climbs the nearest turnbuckle and poses as a wave of flashing lights goes off. “Mak Francis has been paying the price for his attack on HVT at our last show. Thugg came here this week to beat him down, but Tom Flesher interfered in their first altercation, securing Mak’s involvement in this match. That only made things worse, because Thugg came back with a vengeance!” “True, but he ended up getting his comeuppance, as both men have been gunning to get the other to say ‘I Quit’ all night!” adds Comet. “Their rivalry has become full-on hatred, as neither man believes that they will ever say the words ‘I Quit’ again!” The lights go down again; the SmarkTron glows white. As the opening guitars of the Philosopher Kings’ “I Am The Man” vibrate throughought the arena, the words “WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION” fade onto the screen in thin blue lettering. The fans applaud, anticipating the entrance of the Superior One. After a few seconds… *BOOM!* An explosion of blue pyro and smoke lights up the arena as the song rocks out over the speakers! Tom Flesher emerges from the cloud of smoke, striding confidently as videos of his signature moves alternate in half-second clips with the words “SUPERIOR ONE,” “AWARD-WINNING,” “MAIN ATTRACTION” and “THE MAN.” Flesher pauses on the ramp, crossing his arms over his chest as the fans applaud him. They continue cheering for him as he falls out of his pose and walks to the ring, his SWF Title belt slung over his shoulder. “And here comes Tom Flesher, who was in a bit of a pickle at the start of this show. Ejiro and Judge are the best tag team known to man, and after that save last week by Francis he seemed like the logical choice for a partner.” “But Mak made the save because of his dislike for J&R, not for Tom Flesher,” sneers Riley. “He still doesn’t trust him. Neither do I!” Flesher climbs the stairs and, making sure to wipe his feet off on the apron, steps into the ring. As the music fades away, Flesher walks over to Francis and tensely offers a handshake. Francis clasps his hand as Funyon makes his announcement… “From the East Coast,” says Funyon, the East Coast Legacy reference drawing applause... “Weighing in at FOUR hundred and FORTY-NINE pounds… TOM FLESHER and MAK FRANCIS!” “As we said earlier,” says Comet, “Tom and Mak were able to put their differences aside and reunite, in this non-title match, after Flesher showed Francis that he had his back with Thugg.” “And now they’ll go up against the premier team in the SWF… Hearford and Fasaki… Justice and Rule!” “And their OPPONENTS…” booms Funyon. JUSTICE! RULE! POPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOPPOP! “Sleep Now in the Fire" by RATM plays while three-second clips of them nailing tag moves, finishers, cheating, taunting the crowd, and generally being assholes show on the SmarkTron. The dastardly duo makes its way to ringside, soaking up the boos, as they show off and mock-polish their SWF tag team titles. “Making their way to ringside… weighing in at FOUR hundred and SIXTY pounds… Ejiro Fasaki and William Hearford III… JUSTICE and RULE!” They hand the tag belts to some attendants and head to their corner, where they huddle and review their match plan. After the huddle, Ejiro points at Flesher, yelling ‘I want you’ to get under the skin of the World Champ, who acknowledges by stepping out to center ring and leaving Mak outside. Rule and Justice do a quick fistpound, before Hearford leaves the ring. “And it looks like it’ll be Tom Flesher and Ejiro Fasaki to start, which surprises me,” notes Bobby, as the two go away from their respective corners and move about the squared circle. “You don’t say, Riley… after all the antagonizing he just did, I’d be surprised if Tom didn’t start.” “Please, Flesher’s more afraid of Rule than you are of the dark!” “I thought we were going to keep that between us…” DING DING DING!!!!!!!! Flesher and Fasaki square off, with Fasaki smirking at the fact that he beat Flesher cleanly in the center of the ring last week. Flesher, seemingly not distracted at all, pushes forward, cracking his forehead against Fasaki’s as he forcefully grabs a collar-and-elbow tie. The fans applaud his aggression as he snakes his left arm under Fasaki’s right and steps to the side, changing his angle of attack.Fasaki tries to step back, but Flesher quickly drops down and snags him with a high single-leg takedown! He continues the motion, forcing Ejiro to his stomach on the mat. Flesher stays on his back, grinding a forearm into Ejiro’s neck and keeping him planted firmly on the mat. “Flesher takes the initial risk,” says Comet, “and comes out on top, taking charge.” “Sure, in the first five seconds,” says Riley. “Who can’t take charge for five seconds before he loses his steam?” “Well, I wouldn’t say it’s as common for most as for some…” Flesher spins to the front, keeping his arm on Ejiro’s neck. Quickly, applies a front headlock and throws a stiff knee strike into Ejiro’s head! The crowd applauds as Flesher stands up, pulling the stunned Ejiro into a tighter headlock. Ejiro pulls back, allowing Flesher to deepen the underhook on the right arm. He punches his arm through, sending Ejiro to the mat with a cement job! Mark Hebner drops down to count the fall, but Ejiro kicks out even before one. Flesher keeps the headlock, sliding out to the front again. Fasaki quickly rolls out to the side, countering into an arm wrench and backing away. Flesher stands up, only to be met with a kick to the ribs! Ejiro keeps the armwringer, then pulls Flesher in and nails him with a short-arm elbow strike! Flesher falls down, and Ejiro walks over his chest, golf-clapping for himself! Hearford claps along, but the crowd boos. Fasaki acknowledges his partner, then lifts Flesher to his feet and nails him with another elbow. With the champion stunned, Ejiro whips him to the ropes. Flesher hits the ropes and sprints to the other side, ducking a Screaming Elbow along the way. He hits the ropes, where Mak Francis reaches out and slaps him on the shoulder to tag himself in! Ejiro misses it, and Flesher pops up a boot in hopes of nailing a Yakuza kick! Ejiro ducks, and Flesher continues running. He hits the opposite ropes again. Ejiro turns to face him, but Flesher simply baseball slides between his legs as Mak enters the ring. Ejiro turns around and eats a stiff right hand from the Franchise! “OUCH!” shouts Comet. “Flesher dodges a bullet, and Fasaki catches it!” “That was an illegal closed fist!” Riley spits. “If Mark Hebner doesn’t start enforcing that now, this whole match is going downhill!” After that vicious knockdown, Mak shakes out his right hand, as if to say he really overdid it with that one, considering the thickness of Ejiro’s head! Flesher is forced to remove himself form the ring, hands raised in the air, as the referee escorts him back to his corner. “Mark Hebner won’t accept any funny business from Flesher tonight!” says Comet, to which Riley simply grunts. As Tom steps out, Mak Francis lifts Rule to his feet and slaps on a modified side headlock. From there, the Franchise launches a forearm to the side of Fasaki’s head! Mak follows up with an elbow to the nape of the neck, all the while leading Ejiro to a neutral corner. There, a resounding smack echoes throughout the arena as a knife-edge chop lands across the Tag Champion’s chest! This causes him to seize up and attempt to leave the neutral corner. He edges on tippy-toes toward his corner, but the Franchise will have none of that and tosses him back into the turnbuckles before waylaying him with rapidfire chops that get the hot crowd in on the action. *Smack-WHOOOOOOOOOO!* *Smack-WHOOOOOOOOOO!* *Smack-WHOOOOOOOOOO!* Mak, having established control over Fasaki, grabs the stunned grappler by the wrist, leans in and sends him away with a cross corner whip. Ejiro hits the buckles hard and stays there, while the Franchise, still gaining steam, rumbles in to hit a clothesline! Rule slumps down. Grabbing the wilting wrestler by the head, Mak pulls Fasaki– kicking and screaming like a spoiled brat being dragged out of a candy store– to center-ring, pacifying him with a well-placed kidney punch! Looping his arm with Ejiro’s, Mak slams him to the canvas with a Russian leg sweep and floats over into a lateral press for ONE! TWO- No! Only a long one-count, as even with the slight spasms in Fasaki’s back, he wasn’t going to let Mak and Tom have the first two-count of the match! “Superhero Francis leads Fasaki around the ring like a toddler -” Just as Comet says those fateful words, Rule does his name an injustice, stalling out Mak’s offensive with a well planned thumb to the eye! “What a well-executed Greco-Roman thumb counter,” marvels Bobby Riley. “The technical skill is just baffling.” “Well, at least you saw it… I was certain your monitor would be out. Someone should bring that man to JUSTICE after that clear conflagration of the rules!” says Comet. Francis covers his face, staggering. Ejiro, still winded from the onslaught of the Franchise, wobbles away and goes down to one knee, admonished by the referee for his actions but not caring in the least. “I’m sure that’s exactly what he plans to do with Mak, Comet.” adds a snickering Riley. “He’ll bring him to Justice and then they’ll both kick the crap out of him!” Fasaki takes a quick look at Francis and swiftly gets to his feet, because he doesn’t like what he’s seen. Meanwhile, Mak has regained some sight, just in time to see Fasaki leap into the air and spring off a gamengiri! “Standing gamengiri by Ejiro Fasaki, who is on the offensive, as offensive as I find that,” says Comet. “And Robert; weren’t you the one parroting how Hebner won’t take any funny business tonight?” “I meant from Flesher, not Justice and Rule. Gotta focus on the problem children, Comet.” Francis rolls to his BUTT, sensing that he needs to get to his feet before Ejiro can completely take control. And just that quickly, Fasaki, still shaking off the cobwebs catches the Franchise with a Hennig-esque rolling neck snap, sending shockwaves down his spine! Having bought himself enough time to recover completely, Ejiro does what comes naturally, and taunts the crowd, leading to the now-common response. F-U FASAKI! F-U FASAKI! F-U FASAKI! F-U FASAKI! F-U FASAKI! F-U FASAKI! It’s music to his ears, and he shows the crowd just how much he enjoys it by picking Mak Francis up to nail him with a short elbow and stun him. Fasaki cinches in a facelock and grabs the tights for a snap suplex, but Mak sets his leg behind Fasaki’s and blocks the suplex attempt! Francis goes for a suplex of his own, but Ejiro, not to be outdone, lands an elbow to disorient him and tries again to snap Francis over- but no! The Franchise blocks one more time, this time stalling out Fasaki’s efforts almost halfway off the canvas! Ejiro sets Mak back down and endeavors to hit the suplex one more time… but the self-proclaimed Franchise does the unthinkable and… “He just thumbed Rule in the eye!” shouts Bobby Riley indignantly, but Mak’s concealed cheating goes unnoticed by Mark Hebner. “And he scores a vertical suplex after that!” he calls, as Francis rolls through and lands on Rule’s stomach in a mount position, before pounding the everlovin’ crap out of him with a series of right hands! “This is unconscionable!” “Mak taking it to Fasaki with mounted punches—and now, Superhero Francis cinches in a front headlock and drags the vile villain to his corner…” *SLAP* “And there’s the tag! The Superior Citizen is once again legal!” Flesher steps into the ring, nailing an elbow to Ejiro’s back as Francis holds him in position. The Franchise takes advantage of the five-count, holding Fasaki as Flesher administers several kicks to the ribs before Mark Hebner ushers him out of the ring. Flesher coasts into a backdrop suplex, lifting Fasaki off the mat and dropping him onto his shoulders. Rule, however, knows how to avoid being spiked on his head and takes the bump on the back. Flesher holds the bridge, and Mark Hebner counts ONE!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!! Once again, though, Fasaki kicks out comfortably before the three-count. He executes a backward roll, breaking up the bridge. Flesher rolls to his stomach and gets to his feet as Fasaki shakes off the cobwebs. Trying to seize an opportunity, Flesher steps forward to his Fasaki with a thrusting shotei! Fasaki eats the blow to the chin and staggers backwards… right into his own corner! William Hearford tags in and enters the ring, where he finds a confident Flesher waiting in an aggressive stance. “Tom Flesher knows he can take Judge William Hearford,” says Comet. “He’s recorded numerous wins over him, most notably at Genesis IV and last month at Ashes 2 Ashes!” “Fasaki, on the other hand, is 3-0 against Flesher,” notes Riley. “Yes, Bobby, that’s only been drilled into our heads every week for the past month.” “I’m just saying,” Riley says, “he’s better than Flesher, and he can prove it.” “Let’s wait on that one until the SWF World Championship is on the line,” says Comet dismissively. “He pinned him last week! One, two, three, right in the center! What the hell more do you want?!” Damn heel commentators and their “logic.” Hearford steps in, his back to Ejiro and Flesher’s to Mak. Flesher grabs him for a collar-and-elbow tie, but Hearford backs out. Flesher steps forward, trying to lock up again. Once again, Hearford shuffles backwards, and this time Flesher drives into him and grabs him hard at the neck and elbow! Before he knows what happened, though, Hearford takes another step back and circles around, shoving Flesher into the Justice and Rule corner! The crowd boos as Hearford chops him across the chest. *Smack-WHOOOOOOOO!* “William Hearford is showing excellent ring awareness,” says Bobby Riley. “He managed to bait the overaggressive Flesher into his own corner using very little effort on his part. Now, he can take advantage of having the opposition trapped in his corner and not have to worry about him tagging out, because Francis has to stay within the tag rope’s length of the corner if he wants the tag to count.” “Curse those tag ropes!” roars Comet. “Curse them and the vile inky blackness of injustice they bring!” “And curse Mak and the vile inky blackness of his skin!” Comet’s jaw drops. “Nah, I’m just kidding,” chuckles Riley. “Yeesh, the sponsors are so sensitive…” And somewhere, SWF No-Sells Kwanzaa changes its name. Hearford chops Flesher again. *Smack-WHOOOOOOOO!* and Flesher arches back, obviously in pain. He tries to fight his way out of the corner, but… *Smack-WHOOOOOOOO!* Hearford slams another knife-edge chop into his chest! Finally, ‘Judge Mental’ opts to move away from striking and focus more on wearing his opponent down. With that in mind, he forces a forearm across Flesher’s neck and leans forward, pinning the World Champion between his arm and the turnbuckle! Mark Hebner orders Hearford to break the hold, but the Judge ignores him! Hebner begins counting… ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! Finally, Hearford removes the forearm and holds his arms up, declaring his innocence. Hebner turns to admonish him, and Ejiro Fasaki wraps the tag rope around Flesher’s neck! The crowd boos and screams, shouting for Hebner to turn around, but to no avail! Ejiro pulls the rope back, choking the life out of Flesher as Hearford makes sure his chat with Hebner is long and drawn-out. Finally, Hearford nods and turns back to Ejiro, who dutifully releases Flesher. “That was disgusting!” says Comet indignantly. “How can you endorse that sort of sickening vileness?!” Flesher, holding his neck, staggers forward. He reaches out pathetically, as if he expects to reach Francis from the diagonally opposite corner. Hearford ends the spectacle with a stiff right hand, though, and silences the World Champion. He pulls Flesher a few feet out from the corner and slaps on an abdominal stretch! The fans boo as he stretches Flesher out, focusing on his ribs and back. Hebner drops down to one knee, asking Flesher if he wants to submit. Flesher shakes his head, and Hearford slyly reaches a hand out. Ejiro grabs the hand, and Hearford leans back to increase the pressure! Flesher screams in pain as the Tag Team Champions take advantage of the referee’s vision. Hebner stands up, and Ejiro quickly releases Hearford’s hand and conspicuously holds the tag rope up as if to say “I haven’t done anything wrong!” Hebner stares suspiciously, and then drops down once again to ask Flesher if he wants to give up. Once again, Ejiro reaches out and grabs Hearford’s hand, and Flesher screams out loud. “Can you believe this?” seethes Comet. “That official, bless him for the job he’s trying to do, is missing this enormous abuse of the rules!” “They’re doing everything they have available to them within the rules. They’re Justice and Rule, after all. How could you accuse them of being unjust or breaking the rules? Damn it, that’s just silly!” Hebner stands up again, but once again, Ejiro releases Hearford’s hand in time to avoid the official. However, Hearford takes a moment to readjust his balance, giving the World Champion a split second to throw him with a hiptoss! Hearford lands hard on his back, and Flesher starts crawling toward his corner! The crowd begins to cheer as Flesher gets closer and closer to Francis, who leans forward as far as he can! Flesher stretches out, and… FASAKI RUNS IN! Ejiro dives onto him with a double axehandle, stopping Flesher in his tracks! Hearford sits up and Ejiro drags Flesher all the way back to the Justice and Rule corner as the crowd groans with disappointment. “Tom Flesher makes an attempt to escape the vile, rulebreaking ways of the Tag Team Champions, but fails because one of them finds a vile way to interject himself into the match and break the rules!” Comet shakes his head sadly. “Disgusting.” “Incredible,” says Riley. “Fasaki’s got Hearford’s back! Francis doesn’t have Flesher’s!” “I wouldn’t go that far,” says Comet. “I don’t see Makkity Mak making any effort to help Flesher out,” says Riley. “How can you say they’re functioning as a team?” Hearford slams Flesher back into the corner and drives a knee into his stomach, stunning him long enough to tag Fasaki back in. Ejiro springs into the ring, clearly pleased to be able to lay the smack down on Flesher when he can’t defend himself. Fasaki squares off with Flesher, measuring him carefully, making sure he has his distance exactly correct… and then kicks Flesher with all his might right in the sack! The crowd immediately begins to boo. “What was that?” says Comet, angry, as Mark Hebner shoves Ejiro away from the corner and chastises him. “That kick was fair and square,” says Riley smugly. “Fairly hard, and squarely in the testicles.” As Hebner shouts at Ejiro for his utter disrespect for the rules, Hearford wraps the tag rope around Flesher’s neck. Lethargically, the Judge leans back, almost falling off the apron but supporting his weight by holding both ends of the tag rope and pulling back to choke the World Champion. “Oh, and now it’s Hearford’s turn? This man sickens me! I know he’s been disbarred, but isn’t there some higher punishment for a man of his ilk?” “Sure, if you want to call making money and winning titles punishment,” shrugs Riley. “You could do a lot worse.” Ejiro hangs his head, a sarcastic show of shame for the official, and then brushes him aside. Hearford catches his balance and removes the tag rope, allowing Ejiro free access to Flesher. Fasaki grabs Flesher by the wrist and whips him to an adjacent corner, where he follows him in and executes a picture-perfect elbowsmash! Flesher sags into the corner as Fasaki nails him with another elbow, this one just for show. He grabs Flesher’s left arm and spins, diving forward to pull him forward with a judo-style ippon shoulder throw! Flesher flops forward onto his back and sits up. Ejiro steps over the arm, applying a pumphandle armbar. Flesher struggles to escape, once again reaching impotently for his corner despite being too far to get even in range! Ejiro feels him straining to reach the corner and decides to take no chances. He begins slowly shuffling toward his own corner. “Once again, Justice and Rule have the advantage here,” says Riley. “They’re an experienced tag team and they’re used to working together, so they don’t have to work out the kinks like Flesher and Francis do.” “May I remind you,” says Comet, “that the East Coast Legacy was one of the most highly-touted…” “I didn’t hear them introduce the East Coast Legacy tonight, Comet. I heard them introduce two guys who have a grudge to settle.” Ejiro steps toward the corner, still threatening to snap Flesher’s arm off with the pumphandle armbar. The Judge reaches out and tags himself in, stepping into the ring and casually kicking Flesher in the back of the head. Flesher flops down, and Ejiro quickly slides his kneepad down. As the crowd boos, Fasaki jumps into the air and drops a knee down onto Flesher’s shoulder! Mark Hebner immediately orders him out of the ring, and as Fasaki argues, Hearford shouts at Hebner in support of his teammate! All the while, the crowd chants.... “F-U FASAKI! F-U FASAKI! F-U FASAKI!” “Wait a minute,” says Comet. “Which of them is watching…” “Neither of them is watching Flesher!” shouts Riley. “Flesher’s going to get away! No! This can’t be happening!” Flesher crawls toward the corner, trying once again to escape, but Hearford yanks him by the ankle and drops a knee into the small of his back! Flesher screams out loud as the Judge further pounds his back. He sits down firmly and locks on a camel clutch in the center of the ring! The crowd groans as Flesher grimaces in pain. “This is it!” snickers Riley. “Flesher’s locked in a camel clutch right in the middle! There’s nothing he can do to escape it! He’s gonna have to tap out!” Flesher winces, trying to hold out as long as he can… but Mak Francis makes things easy by charging into the ring and nailing Hearford with a Yakuza kick! The crowd cheers as the Franchise breaks up the hold, but Mark Hebner shoves him back, ushering him out of the ring. Mak tries to stay in the ring, but his distraction of the official allows Ejiro Fasaki to jump into the ring and start stomping Flesher! Hearford stands up and joins in the stomping as Hebner ushers the frustrated Francis back out. Mak moves out, angry, as Fasaki takes Hearford’s place in the ring. “And what we have there is a bait and switch,” says Comet. “Justice exited, and Rule takes over.” “Hey, it’s only cheating if you get caught,” says Riley. Ejiro grabs Flesher and pulls him to his feet. As the stunned Superior One tries to regain his senses, Ejiro whips him to the ropes. Flesher bounces off, and Ejiro steps in to nail him with a bionic elbow! Flesher crumbles to the mat, and Ejiro covers him for ONE!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!! KICKOUT!!!!!!!! “The Superior Citizen kicks out after a bionic elbowsmash, but things do not look good for the home team,” says Comet gravely. “Home team? We’re in Wyoming!” “Wyoming is on the East Coast of something.” Ejiro shakes his head, surprised, but quickly recovers. He pulls Flesher up and hits another Irish whip, this one sending him into the Justice and Rule corner. As he crashes chest-first into the buckles, William Hearford grabs his arms to keep him from turning around. Ejiro swaggers in and plants a stiff kick into the small of Flesher’s back! Mark Hebner admonishes Hearford to release Flesher, but the Judge refuses, and Hebner is forced to administer the five-count. As he counts, Ejiro continues throwing kicks into Flesher’s back. Hebner counts, “FOUR!” and Hearford releases Flesher’s arms. He reaches over and tags Ejiro, who steps out of the ring and grabs Flesher’s arms the same way. Hearford continues the assault as Hebner counts once again. As he reaches five, again, Ejiro releases him. Fluidly, Hearford grabs Flesher around the waist and arches backwards, nailing the World Champion with a German suplex! He bridges, holding Flesher for ONE!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE- NO!!!!!!!!!!!!! Flesher rolls through, once again avoiding the pin. Hearford, however, has plans to finish off the Superior World Champion. He lifts Flesher up and crosses his arms over his stomach, a bellwether of the deadly straitjacket suplex! The crowd boos as Ejiro bounces on the bottom rope, trying to get them to applaud along with him. Hearford jacks Flesher up… but Tom somersaults forward, executing a picture-perfect granby roll to counter the suplex! He rolls to his feet as Hearford loses his grip, and Tom dives forward… “Can he do it?” says Comet with bated breath. “Can Tom Flesher…” “… tag out to his buddy and skip out on the hard part once again?” *SLAP* The crowd explodes as Mak Francis makes the tag!!!!!!!!! He roars into the ring, catching Hearford as he charges with a kneelift that sends the Judge head-over-heels into a somersault! Ejiro Fasaki runs in to help his partner, but Mak catches him with a bearhug and arches effortlessly back with a Railgun suplex! He rolls over and jumps to his feet as Hearford sprints toward him, looking for his deadly lariat! Francis ducks, though, and nails Hearford in the back of the head with a superkick that ends with the Judge slumping in the corner! Francis turns around and sees Fasaki charging at him. Mak hits an aggressive duck-under and spins around, catching the World Champion’s nemesis with an absolutely Filthy German suplex! He releases Ejiro at the height of the throw, and Ejiro lands hard on his upper back and shoulders, rolling through onto his stomach! On a roll, Francis grabs the stunned Judge Hearford by the arm and whips him to the ropes… where Tom Flesher pulls the top rope down! The crowd applauds as Hearford tumbles over the top rope and to the floor! “Filthy as a scheissefilm! Citizen Francis makes the save and absolutely destroys both Justice and Rule like a house of fire!” Comet cheers Francis on from the sidelines, and continues, “That ought to show Justice!” Mak moves over to Ejiro, who starts to recover from the shock of the Filthy German. Mak capitalizes on the few extra seconds, though, by lifting Ejiro and shoving him like a ragdoll into Flesher’s corner. He unleashes a sickening knife-edge chop… *Smack-WHOOOOOOOO!* that not only pops the crowd but makes Ejiro’s whole body shudder! Francis follows it up with another… *Smack-WHOOOOOOOO!* and another…. *Smack-WHOOOOOOOO!* and another! *Smack-WHOOOOOOOO!* As Francis finishes up the last chop, William Hearford starts to get to his feet, but the refreshed Tom Flesher dives off the apron and executes a short-range somersault, nailing his opponent with a diving senton! Hearford hits the concrete hard, and Flesher rolls through, shaking off the impact as the adrenaline rushes through his body! He jumps up, nailing Hearford with a stomp to the sternum before he climbs back onto the apron! “Tom Flesher is pulling his weight despite the beating he’s taken at the hands of Justice and Rule,” shills Comet. “And Mak Francis, a picture of vim and vigor, is destroying Ejiro Fasaki! Perhaps he’s sending a message to HVT!” “Yeah, and that message is ‘I can kick anyone’s ass if I outweigh them by 20 pounds.’ Face it, Comet, Mak’s never gonna be able to get Thugg to tap out. It’s pointless to even try.” Mak goes for another knife-edge chop, but Ejiro catches the arm! In desperation, he pushes forward, going for a judo-style ippon shoulder throw. He dives forward, but Mak blocks the throw by grabbing onto the top rope and letting Fasaki’s grip slip off his arm! As Fasaki loses his balance, Francis drops down and locks on a full nelson, then jacks Fasaki up off the mat! Flesher pumps his fist in the air, firing up the crowd as Mak arches back, slamming Fasaki head-first to the mat with a dragon suplex! He rolls through, switches his grip and immediately rolls into the Cattle Mutilation! “BITTERSWEET!” shouts Comet. “And this match truly shall come to a bittersweet end for Justice and Rule, for despite the fact that they spent the majority getting their licks in on Tom Flesher, there simply isn’t any way to escape this one!” Flesher, instead of letting the hold complete, slides into the ring. He springs off the ropes, dropping a headbutt into Ejiro Fasaki’s back! Francis feels Fasaki’s convulsions and releases the hold, looking up at Flesher with a look of confusion… almost betrayal. Until Flesher smirks and points to the top rope. The crowd explodes as Francis scales the cornerpost! Flesher grabs Fasaki in a front facelock and yanks him to his feet, tightening the grip until he ducks his head under Ejiro’s shoulder! He lifts Ejiro off the mat and holds him upside down, stalling! As he stalls, William Hearford climbs onto the apron! He moves toward Mak, hoping to throw the Franchise off the top rope and prevent the inevitable finish… but Mak kicks him away! Two kicks fail, but a third nails Hearford in the head, and he falls to the floor with a splat! “Hearford’s not very good at that,” says Comet frankly. After what seems like an eternity, Flesher falls to the mat, pulverizing Fasaki’s head with a brainbuster! From the top, Mak shouts, “EAST COAST!” He springs off the rope, bringing his knees and elbows together as the crowd responds with… “FUCK YOU, FASAKI!” and goes wild! Mak extends his body, slamming into the prone Fasaki with a frog splash! Mak rolls off, holding his ribs from the impact of the move, but Tom Flesher rolls onto Fasaki and hooks the leg! “Flesher goes for the cover!” shouts Comet. “Is this it? Will the East Coast FU give the World Champion his first victory over Ejiro Fasaki?!” “NO!” cries Riley. “No, he doesn’t deserve it! Francis did all the work! This can’t be happening!” Mark Hebner counts ONE!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DING DING DING!!!!! Flesher stands up, grabbing Francis by the wrist and helping him to his feet. “The winners of this match… MAK FRANCIS AND TOM FLESHER!!!!!!!!!” Flesher and Francis raise their arms into the air as the fans applaud. Ejiro, meanwhile, rolls out of the ring. Flesher and Francis stay in the ring, and Mark Hebner hands Flesher his World Heavyweight Title belt. Tom wraps it around his waist, showing how important it is to him. “Tom Flesher scores the important moral victory over Ejiro Fasaki tonight,” says Cyclone Comet. “With the help of Mak Francis, he scores a pin in the center of the ring over Ejiro with the East Coast FU, and the former East Coast Legacy reunites for one night only to put Justice and Rule down for the count!” “Let’s see them do it when the titles are on the line!” grumbles Riley. “Come on, we all know this wasn’t the best they could have done! It’s Justice, for god’s sake! It’s Rule! You don’t think they’d roll over this easy when the titles are on the line?!” “And you don’t think Flesher will take the pin lying down when Ejiro has a title shot, do you?” “That’s different!” “Sure it is, Robert, but as it stands, Tom Flesher breaks Ejiro Fasaki’s streak! He pins Ejiro in the ring and builds momentum going into the SWF’s holiday extravaganza, where Fasaki will get his shot! We’ll see you then, but until Sunday, I am Cyclone Comet, and for Bobby Riley, we’d like to wish you a merry Christmas and many blessings in the New Year!” “Ah, speak for yourself.” === SWF Storm Special Edition, December 10, 2003. © White Apple Productions. All rights reserved. The Smarks Wrestling Federation: “Raising workrate by typing faster.”

BOOM!! BOOM!! BOOM!! BOOM!! And magically, SWF Storm begins transmission, complete with huge pyrotechnics and theme music. The fans are completely and utterly amped for this show, since it’s just bursting at the seams with excitement. “Hello, folks, and welcome to SWF Storm, live from the Laramie Arena-Auditorium in boring old Laramie, Wyoming! I’m Bobby Riley, joined as always by the one and only-” “CYCLOOOOOOOOOOONE COMET!” Riley smirks. “Comet, how can you be excited in such a boring place?” “It is time for me to spread the power of good and time for you to study further the ways of right! How can one not be excited?” Riley sighs. “Never mind. But we’re going to get things started off quickly here-” Suddenly, the lights cut out, the crowd going silent for a second. Then, strobe lights pulse to the beat of the guitar and drums in the background as Saliva’s “King of My World” kicks in, the crowd beginning to boo as they realize who it is. As the first words kick in, the strobes cut out, a pale blue light covering the arena, illuminating the figure of Michael Craven as he walks out onto the stage, no expression visible on his shadowed face. Continuing his walk down to the ring, he turns around at the top of the ramp, walking backwards as he stretches his arms out wide, soaking in the crowd’s jeers. Halfway down the ramp, though, he abruptly spins back around, swinging his right arm in a straight path across the top of the stage. “BOOM!” A huge blast of bright white pyro kicks up, the smoke lingering on stage for quite some time as Craven finishes the spin, continuing his walk to ringside without interruption. “Ladies and gentlemen,” Funyon booms,” would you please welcome the King of Nightmares... MICHAEL CRAAAAAVEN!!” Entering casually through the middle and top ropes, Craven quickly scales the turnbuckle closest to him, opening his arms wide and soaking in the crowd’s response, a chorus of heavy boos, as a white spotlight shines down upon him, casting shadows across his face. Mike remains up top, staring back at the entryway before he hops down and makes his way to the center of the ring, snatching the mic from Funyon’s hands. “And once again,” Riley states, “The King of Nightmares graces us with his beautiful voice. Take it away, Craven!” The King of Nightmares stands there as the lights come up in the arena, Craven’s facial expression showing his disgust in something. “Cut the music.” His cold demand is met, and “King of My World” comes to an abrupt stop, leaving only the sounds of thousands of booing fans behind Craven’s speech as he begins. “I’m out here looking for an answer from a specific person on a question I brought up to them a while ago, and to further prove the injustices this same man has put me in.” The crowd isn’t in the mood for it, chanting loudly: “You suck! You suck!” Craven, though, holds a hand up to them, trying to get them to calm down as he speaks again. “First, it’s no title shots. Then, you just had to push me, didn’t you? Putting me in a match against Thugg, full knowing Mak Francis would interfere in the match! You knew what Thugg could do to a man, and you still made me fight that bastard.” Craven’s remark draws strong boos, the crowd despising Craven’s shrewd comments. “You knew what would happen, and you allowed myself to be put in danger, letting Francis get away with that shot to MY head! My head, Mark Stevens. And I did NOTHING to provoke him!” The crowd’s boos are louder this time, some still cheering Craven on, those who actually are his fans, or those who do not like Stevens, but most just boo at Craven for his attack on Stevens as he delivers his arguments. “You run a very loose ship, Mark. I can’t believe you let things like this happen.” Craven sighs and shakes his head, perhaps even feeling sorry for Stevens. “And worst of all... I haven’t heard back from you about that title shot, and since I figure you’re on your way out here to have my ass removed from the ring, then maybe you can explain yourself-” As Craven finishes up, the lights go out... several seconds of hushed silence cause the crowd to become restless... they are clapping, talking, shouting, waving signs, waiting for whatever is about to happen... “CRACK!” The crowd, simply put, explodes! The crack of a bat and the roar of the crowd announce Grand Slam!! It quickly fades into the opening drumline of "Go Home" by Blessid Union of Souls. The SmarkTron lights up with baseball highlights mixed with big spots from Grand Slam's matches while flashing the words "Grand Slam", "Mark Stevens" and "The Heavy Hitter". The various multicolored lights flash in time with the rhythmic drumbeats until the drums roll fast and the lead singer yells out "Go Home", then the arena is flooded with bright white light!! Red and white pyro explodes at the top of the entrance ramp!! When the smoke clears and everyone can see again, "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens is standing underneath the SmarkTron, microphone in hand!!! The crowd erupts in even more cheers for the Heavy Hitter!!! “It’s Stevens!” Comet exclaims. “He’s come to do what is right and smite the evil in that ring once and for all!” “I doubt it,” Riley answers back, “because Craven’s a lot bigger, stronger, and more mobile than he is...” As the music dies down, the fans cheering, Mark Stevens raises the mic to his lips, finding himself in a familiar place as he walks down the ramp and towards the ring. “What do you want, Mike? This is twice now you’ve come out and asked for something.” “I laid it all out for you last time, Mark,” Craven smoothly replies. “Don’t give me that excuse.” “If this is about the title shot,” Stevens states as he slides into the ring and gets to his feet, “then I’m afraid I can’t say anything on it.” Craven, though, doesn’t look too pleased, stomping his foot in the ring, the anger building inside of him like a bulge on a volcano, ready to erupt. “Oh come on!” Craven whines. “Yes you can! You can say, ‘Sure thing, Craven. Whenever you want a shot, you got it!’” He pauses for a second. “Now that’s not so hard, is it?” Stevens pauses for a second, pondering it, then responds to Craven’s face. “I’m not going to do it, Craven. Tom is facing Ejiro at the PPV. That’s final.” “I don’t care about the PPV, and I hope Ejiro tears Flesher apart,” Craven fires back, drawing boos from the crowd. “It’ll make my job a lot more easier.” Stevens looks bewildered. He doesn’t know what in the blue hell Craven wants from him, and perhaps he shouldn’t ask, but as Commissioner, he must. “Then what’s your problem, Mike?” “It’s that YOU,” pointing at Stevens and pushing his index finger into Stevens’ chest, “YOU have been trying to punish me for my beliefs. that’ discrimination, Mark Stevens. You put me in that match, knowing that Thugg or Mak would beat me down and injure me. You tried to take me out because you know I’m a threat to your iron-grip on this federation and to Flesher’s World Title reign... but it didn’t work, because I’m still here. I’m still standing, Stevens. You failed in your attempt to bring me down. And on top of that, the fact that you just give out title shots to whomever sucks your dick the best-” The crowd boos loudly at the King of Nightmares’ commentary on Stevens’ selection of who gets title shots and who doesn’t, the fans deeply hating Craven while their boos rage like water bursting through a dam and flooding the valley beneath it. Sensing a loss of control, Craven violently reacts to their boos, trying to get them just to shut the hell up. “SHUT UP, DAMMIT! I’m speaking!” The crowd only boos louder, but slowly, they quiet down, allowing Craven to speak again. “Like I was saying, you only give them to your little mindless slaves, Mark, rewarding your goons for a job well done. That’s sickening and unfair, and I will not stand for it!” “Like you weren’t one of King’s little mindless slaves?” Stevens interrogates. The crowd pops loudly for Stevens’ little barb at Craven, but he doesn’t take it too well, seething heavily for a few seconds before he gets control of his emotions, turning his attention back to the SWF Commissioner. “Well, I’m afraid I don’t have time to waste playing little mind games with you, Mark. You’ve obviously done no thinking on the subject, and you’re not going to give me an definite answer right now.” Craven steps forward, leaning in to Mark’s face, gritting his teeth while the crowd begins to slowly pop for this, wanting to see Stevens just deck Craven at this moment, but it doesn’t happen. Instead, Craven speaks again. “Keep thinking then, Mark, because I’ll be waiting, and I’ll keep coming out here until I get a good answer from you...” Craven begins to turn and leave, but he catches himself, turns around, and faces Stevens again with one final little note... “Oh, and when you see Mr. Flesher, tell him he’s got a present waiting for him under the SWF tree from The King of Nightmares, whether he likes it or not... it’s a very special little surprise I’ve been working on, and he’ll be the first one to see it.” And with that, “King of My World” hits, Craven exiting the ring and walking towards the ramp backwards so he can see Stevens in the ring while Riley and Comet commentate on the situation. “I’m confused. What’s Craven mean, Robert?” Comet wonders. “What is this present for Flesher?” “I don’t know, Comet...” Riley states, “but that’s not important. Craven’s taking on Stevens, fighting for his freedom! Aren’t you proud?” “He is no freedom fighter!” Comet exclaims. “He is a-” “Whoa, whoa, Comet. None of that,” Riley interrupts. “Let’s just go to commercial before you say something really stupid...” Stevens continues to watch Craven walk up the ramp, even as the crowd cheers for him and chants his name, ready for whatever Craven has planned... ...he hopes.