Kaertos

go to symantec.com and look up the virus in their "virus encyclopedia". That will tell you what files would be changed and how to change them back.

It isn't just this time that we have been burnt on co-writes Crow. It has been happening for a while, and it is never intentional. Something always just "comes up". The worst thing to hear from someone at 1 am when you are trying to get a show up is "so-and-so was co-writing with me and they dropped off the face of the Earth!" As I remember, co-writes used to be (strictly -speaking) against the rules. It is when people started with these 25,000 word PPV matches that they started to happen. My solution, again, is to find ways to write more effectively. I maintain that a well-written 2500 word match will beat a long "wow! Look at how many words I wrote! It must be a good match" match every time. Why? Wel, to be frank, the wildcard in my point system is a head-to-head, ten point "More entertaining" award. It has turned the tide more than once. The era of the co-write was kicked off by one of my matches, I think (the over-booked "Regenerate Rules" match), so I feel like I have some knowledge of how they work. I think they can be an asset when used correctly, but more often than not they are just short-cuts for people writing. Besides, a PPV shouldn't be a card full of co-writes.

In my archiving a while back, I was lucky enough to have one of the great Comet promos in my section. Thus, I present it to you now... PROMO: Prime Evil Promo!! (…a dark corridor, somewhere in the old IGNWF arena. From one end of it comes the sound of footsteps… and suddenly three men turn the corner: a grim Fallout in the lead, with El Luchador Magnifico and the Silencer flanking him…) Fallout: Listen up, minions… we are going to go over the plan, go over our moves, until the two of you are THE most dangerous wrestlers in this fed, because I will NOT allow the Stables title to leave Prime Evil…not now, not ever! ELM: Si, senor! We shall pulverize those foolish, how you say, Carnies! And we shall be victorious over the Burning Bird of Death in Flight! Silencer: It'll be a quiet day in hell before we lose to those pathetic… (Silencer trails off, squinting through the darkness… then suddenly chuckles.) Silencer: It looks like we can get started early, Fallout… guess which spandex freak I see down there! ELM: The Falling Star Which Drops Houses On Witches! He dishonors my masked ancestors! Fallout (growling): Look sharp, you worms… and don't hurt his arm. Otherwise, it won't look as nice when it's mounted over my fireplace… (The three men stride down the hallway towards their target, which is leaning casually against the wall facing the other way. As PE closes in, finally that glorious champion of right and good, Cyclooone COMET, turns to face them; Prime Evil stops, less than ten feet away…) Comet: Greetings, citizens! Any crimes to report? Fallout (grinning ferociously): Just one, but trust me, it'll be an easy one to solve… (Fallout stalks forward, bringing his fist back; Comet suddenly jumps back into a martial stance.) Comet: A-HA! You have walked into my incredibly effective trap of justice!! (Fallout swiftly glances around, expecting an ambush; not spotting anyone, he glares at Comet.) Fallout: Funny man… you'll be grinning big when I rip your skull out of your mouth… Comet: Not quite, my fiendish foe! Consider: you came expecting to, as they say in the professional wrestling business, "cut a promo" on me, correct? Fallout (confused): What are you talking about? Comet: The tables have turned, criminal! For now… it is YOU who are caught… in a PRIME EVIL PROMO!! (And with that, Fallout receives a mighty blow from behind, sending him sprawling! He rolls around… and there stand Axis, Rane, and Suicide, all grinning with anticipation! El Luchador Magnifico and the Silencer are nowhere to be seen…) Fallout: Hell's bells! Where are they?! Comet: Churlish knave! This is a Prime Evil promo, where even if you are part of a large stable, no one ever rescues you! (Fallout gets up to his feet… but is promptly pummeled from all sides by Phoenix Uprising! Axis picks him up and throws him like a javelin into the wall; Rane throws him into the ceiling; Suicide grabs chair after chair and nails him with them all! Finally, both Axis and Rane pick Fallout off the ground, and Suicide locks on and nails the Russian Roulette! Fallout collapses to the ground. Cyclone Comet, who has been sitting all this out, now walks forward and stands over Fallout's body!) Comet: Ha! Now you see, pitiful cretin, how good triumphs over evil! …In fact, I've written an essay to that effect. (whips out a thick ream of paper) Ahem… "From the beginning of the IGNWF, it became clear that all heels absolutely sucked. We can see from various examples…" (Time passes…) Comet: "…and then, we saw a new renaissance of faces, as the Junior League was created. One of the most famous, of course, was that noble champion of justice, Cyclone Comet…" Fallout: Er… can I get up now? Comet: NO! It's a Prime Evil promo; we've beaten you up, you don't recover until AFTER we cut lengthy promos about how cool we are. Where was I? "…that noble champion of justice…" (The hours pass… day turns to night, night to day again… until…) Comet: "…and so, with two heels trying to gain the title who cannot get through a single match without grabbing the mike in the middle and gabbing on for ten minutes, we can clearly see that only a face can truly be a champion. The End." Okay, guys, let's go! (The four men turn around and start walking away…) Fallout: That's it? Can I get up now? Comet: Oh, sure! Fallout (getting up): Damn, my ears hurt from all that… Comet: AHA!! (Fallout looks up as Phoenix Uprising nails a quadruple spear on him, knocking him down the corridor to tumble and crash in a heap! Rane grabs him… ACID RANE! Axis grabs him… FACTOR BOMB! Suicide climbs up a handy ladder… SWAN SONG! Cyclone Comet grabs him… CYCLOTRON! …After that series of finishers, all four faces catch their breath…) Comet: Foolish nogoodnik! You are not freed of your just punishmet! That was simply another part of the Prime Evil promo, where you make a desperate attempt to counterattack, only to be completely destroyed by our complete superiority and dominance! Fallout (in pain): Guuhhh… Comet: Oh, and by the way, El Luchador and the Silencer have both being run over by steamrollers in the parking lot. How can that be, when PU has been here the entire time? Simple... PU: It's a Prime Evil promo! Comet: And now, for the coup de grace… Suicide, if you would… it is time for… THE BLADING! (As Fallout gapes, unable to move, Suicide grins evilly, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out…) Fallout: …A sponge?? What the hell is that for? (Suicide grins, then winds up and throws the sponge at Fallout, nailing him in the forehead. FALLOUT IS BUSTED OPEN! BLOOD JETS INTO THE AIR! Soon, the entire corridor is knee-deep in Fallout's hemoglobin!!) Fallout: …What the <BEEP>?!?! It was a sponge! Comet: Hey, what can I say? It's your promo, dude! Fallout: …Look, Molock handled the promos mostly, not me; maybe you should… Comet: SILENCE, craven amoeba! Your cowardly words are anathema to me!! Fallout: Hey… you know, you're right! I'm not even talking like I usually talk! …Don't tell me, "Prime Evil promo", right? (Phoenix Uprising nods.) Fallout: Wait a sec… I remember… at the end of our promos, we would always find out that we had just been beating on straw dummies with tape recorders shoved up their butts! Comet: Is that so? Fallout: Yeah, you damn weaklings! So all I have to do is reach up and turn off the recorder, and then we can end this stupid thing and I can kick your candy-<BEEP>! Now let's see… (Fallout… well, he, er… well, reaches up and… um, well… let's just say that Phoenix Uprising tries not to look at the contorted figure as he, er… scrabbles…) Fallout: Dammit, where is it?! I know it's in there somewhere! Comet: Um, Fallout? Fallout: Where'd you hide it, you dumb<BEEP>?! I'll find it soon enough… Comet: Fallout, the promo hasn't exactly ended yet… so technically you're not a straw dummy, you're just, er, you… so you're not exactly going to find a tape recorder, um, where you're looking for it… (There is an uncomfortable pause… more uncomfortable for some than others…) Fallout: Fine. I give up. Whatever. Just end this stupid promo and let me die in peace. Comet: Well, okay… (And Comet pulls out a shotgun and blows Fallout's head off with an explosive burst of gore.) Comet: Let that be a lesson to you! (And the four members of Phoenix Uprising walk off. The twisted and headless body of Fallout, only one arm visible, lies disgustingly (and disgustedly) on the floor…) (…and suddenly, the scene freezes, and some words appear across the screen: "CYCLONE COMET WINS - PRIME EVIL PROMO BONUS +1000 pts. SAVE NOW (Y/N)?") (As we pull away, we see that the television screen showing Fallout's untimely demise is attached to a game console, around which are grouped the four heartily-laughing members of Phoenix Uprising. Cyclone Comet proudly puts down the gamepad.) Comet: Now THAT is a cheat code! Axis: HA HA HA HA HA! That was too sweet, Comet! Rane: Heh heh... I'm planning on using just a little of that at Crossfire, when we take their precious Stables title away… Comet: Now Rane, cheating is WRONG… unless it's one I've specifically put into our IGNWF Genesis video game myself! Suicide: Okay, cool, now show me the one where I have a flaming kendo stick instead of an arm… (The four men laugh as Comet saves and restarts, star-wiping the scene…)

Frost, I see your point. Let me make a couple of my own, and maybe restore some faith in what King and I are doing. Point one: I forget the audience here is more "smarky" than I am with a much lower tolerance for non-wrestling angles. Point two: King and I take this very seriously, maybe a little too seriously. Be that as it may, I would never run an angle like this just to get myself or King over. There will be implications, I promise. And as far as I can see, Grand Slam isn't returning to the announcer's table anytime soon. I hope that makes some of you feel a little better about the storyline.

And believe it or not Ejiro, I appreciate your comments. I think sometimes us old-timers get a big head about how important or beloved we (our characters) are. I am glad someone would rather have been honest and said that the angle didn't work for them than lie or say nothing. Is it frustrating? Well, sure. Is it useful? Yes, it is.

I see... so it isn't that people didn't read it, they just don't care. I'm not sure if that is better or worse. ::sigh:: I thought I meant more to the Fed than that. Honestly, I was hoping for a bit more reaction than that. I wasn't expecting long-winded "NOOOO!!!!" type posts, but more than one or two people mentioning it would have been nice. Between the opening package (which was mine, by the way) and the "Grand Slam gets fired promo" I wrote for three and a half hours. I know this doesn't seem like a lot to those of you who wrote PPV matches, but if you consider I retired because I didn't have time to write... well, let me just say there were better ways to spend my Sunday than this. This may sound bitter, and I guess it is. There was a time when nearly everyone would take the 30 seconds to comment on matches and promos, at least to let the writer know they read it. I guess I miss that level of involvement in the Fed. I was going to take the high ground and not say these things, but Ejiro's comment hurt. I might be out of line, but so be it. I think I have earned to right to say what I really think once in a while.

I see. I'll open it until tonight. I think I'll be online this evening for a little while and I'll close it back up. I just don't want any confusion.

Why do you need the thread unlocked to get your stats out of it? Its not that I have a problem with doing it, I'm just curious as to why it needs done.

I used to be like that about work, i.e. the whole "come in and cover for someone on your day off" jazz, but I got screwed on it too many times. Trading shifts with people who convienently "forget", getting yelled at by a manager becuase you need to move your days around whene everyone else changes theirs. I finally gave up on it. I work the hours I am scheduled, no more, no less. It isn't worth the loss of what little free time I have for the money.

I hadn't thought of it that way. I'm not sure if that analysis would be enough to get me to like the movie, but it might be enough for me to not turn it off if I catch it on TV again. I'll give it a shot.

Indeed, the Crippler is frightening. Expierience has shown me however that any of the Superstars can be terrifying with the right deck construction.

I know i am in the minority on this, but I was incredibly disappointed by Batman Returns. For one thing, when I got to see a movie about Batman, I want it to be about Batman. While Catwoman is a good villain, I've never liked Penguin much, and this movie made him worse. I doubt if I would buy it on DVD. I'd probably skip the box set and just buy a good Batman and Batman Forever DVD.

Here is a place for everyone not actively involved in the thread (I count anyone whose characters actually appear as "actively involved", wrestling or not) since both of the older ones are unable to be editied since the crash. If no one posts stats here in the near future, I will just delete it and move on.

Thread started 8-12-2003 (post Ground Zero) After the board crash it was decided that a new stats thread should be started so people can edit their stats and we can keep the thread relatively clean. Any retiree stats should go into the "Archived Stats Thread" which will be up by the time you read this. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kliq 4 Life --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- SmarkBoards Name: Grand Slam AIM: Mulkiathe Wrestlers Name: "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens Nickname: The Heavy Hitter, Slammer Height: 6'6 Weight: 286 lbs. Hometown: Lincoln, Nebraska Age: 35 Face/Heel: Mega-Face Stable: Midnight Carnival (Once a Carnie, always a Carnie.) Tag Partner (optional): None Ring Escort: None Weapon(s): Baseball Bat (or two), occasionally even the Spark Model Hardcore Special Bat (a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire and able to be set on fire). Quotes: "And that, my friends, is a damn promise." "I don't start feuds... I end them." "Step up to the plate Junior, and find out why they call me the Heavy Hitter!" Looks: Red hair cut pretty short and a little spikey on top, blue eyes, close-cropped red goatee, fair skin. He is built well, actually getting a little bigger across the chest and in his arms since he retired because of increased time to just work out. Street Clothes: Wears jeans (black or blue), gym shoes, a Grand Slam t-shirt (Either the classic grey with MVP on the front in faded blue, the semi-classic "Step Up to the Plate" in Black or the newer "Property of the Bases Loaded Training Center" on the front), a baseball cap (different MLB teams, SWF logo or the Midnight Carnival logo) and a varsity jacket (Black suede with grey sleeves) with his last name on the back over the number 25 and a small "MVP" on the left chest. Ring attire: Black calf high boots with shin guards (similar to Jericho), Black tights with either a red or blue abstract design on the legs, a black and gray suede varsity jacket with "Grand Slam" on the back (which he removes before the start of the match) and red or blue (depending on the tights) wristbands. In matches he will be wearing a heavy knee brace on his left knee (the remnant of a nasty injury in both the JL and, recently, the SWF) and an elbow pad on his right arm (a little ligament damagefrom his baseball career). Ring Entrance: Music: "Go Home" - Blessid Union of Souls The lights go out... several seconds of hushed silence cause the crowd to become restless... they are clapping, talking, shouting, waving signs, waiting for whatever is about to happen... ::Crack!!!:: The crowd, simply put, explodes! The crack of a bat and the roar of the crowd announce Grand Slam!! It quickly fades into the opening drumline of "Go Home" by Blessid Union of Souls. The SmarkTron lights up with baseball highlights mixed with big spots from Grand Slam's matches while flashing the words "Grand Slam", "Mark Stevens" and "The Heavy Hitter". The various multicolored lights flash in time with the rhythmic drumbeats until the drums roll fast and the lead singer yells out "Go Home", then the arena is flooded with bright white light!! Red and white pyro explodes at the top of the entrance ramp!! When the smoke clears and everyone can see again, "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens is standing underneath the SmarkTron!!! The crowd erupts in even more cheers for the Heavy Hitter!!! Funyon: ::Makes announcement:: As Funyon makes his announcement, Grand Slam runs back and forth on the stage, waving his arms, pumping his fists, anything to fire up the crowd! The Heavy Hitter walks down the ramp slowly, savoring every moment of cheers and pointing at various fans, slapping hands and keeping them screaming! Tonight, as the camera zooms in, he is wearing a (Fill in either the local MLB team or an SWF) baseball cap!! When the crowd sees this, they cheer even louder, nearly drowning out his music!! Grand Slam steps into the ring between the ropes and heads to a corner. He then climbs to the second turnbuckle, looks at the crowd, then pumps his right fist into the air several times, firing the crowd up even more and causing a flurry of flashbulbs to pop, illuminating the ring like a strobe-light!! Before dropping back to the mat, Grand Slam flings his cap out to the crowd, giving some lucky fan a unique souvenir from the SWF!!! Tag/Stable Entrance: The arena lights fade into blackness as a soft female voice whispers, “Midnight Carnival.” The IGNTron flashes blazing white in time with the opening beats of the Red Hot Chili Peppers’ “Love Rollercoaster” as the Carnival’s anthem pumps through the arena, revealing with each flash thin black lettering that reads “Step Right Up.” As the guitar part drops in, three blue laser lights trace the arena, all stemming from the same point in the middle of the entrance ramp. As the words “rollercoaster of love” echo through the arena for the first time, the laser lights flare out into a blue haze across the entrance ramp as the members of the Midnight Carnival step out from behind the curtain. As the refrain arrives for the first time, the arena plunges back into darkness just as purple strobe lights tear through the house and the blue laser lights spiral wildly, illuminating the members of the Midnight Carnival in funky, staccato bursts. The IGNTron video plays, flashing half-second clips of classic maneuvers from the Carnival’s members. They make their way to the ring, and get down to the business at hand. Stats: Strength: 6 (Has been working out heavily since he retired to stay in shape) Speed: 3 (His knee is healed and his cane is history. His mobility isn't what it once was though, and it was never great.) Vitality: 4 (He has been in the ring rehabbing his knee over the past few weeks, so he is getting his wind back.) Charisma: 7 (Loved by fans everywhere. So over with the crowd it is frightening.) Style: Grand Slam is a natural talent in the ring. He can pound you with big time power moves or wrestle a more catch-as-catch can technical style. He is a move encyclopedia, a talent enhanced by his time calling matches from the announce table. In general he prefers to put people away with the Walk-Off (which he can pull out at a moment's notice) but the Seventh Inning Stretch is a proven and reliable submission finisher. Out of his signature moves, the Grand Slam, Moonsault and Figure Four are near finisher quality, but he only rarely gets wins with them. To be honest, the Moonsault should be under rare moves, but it is a signature spot, just not one he uses that often. The biggest mistake an opponent could make is to take him lightly in a "garbage match" though. When he's angry, the Heavy Hitter can brawl and "be hardcore" with the best of them. Signature moves: The "Grand Slam" - a face-first Full Nelson Slam The "Double Play" - I hit the full nelson sit-out atomic drop, then maintain full nelson as I stand up and hit the "Grand Slam" Full Nelson Sit-out Atomic Drop (Bubba Bomb) The Figure Four Leglock Falling Neckbreaker Sidewalk Slam Snap Suplex Belly-to-Belly Suplex Moonsault (top rope) (looks like Bill DeMott's - very straight body position) DDT Spinebuster (old fasioned Arn Anderson spin 'em around and deliver the spinebuster) German Suplex Knife-edge chops Un-common moves: Flying Cross-Body Sharpshooter Big Boot Running DDT (like the one Taker does) Northern Lights Suplex "Super" kick (similar to but not nearly as cool as HBK's finisher) Russian Leg Sweep Facebuster Stalling Vertical Suplex Superplex (off top rope) Rare moves: Flying Elbow (top rope) Chokeslam Powerbomb Inverted DDT Leg Drop Tilt-a-Whirl Powerslam Underhook Leg Trap (Neck submission) Stalling Brainbuster Jawbreaker Back Mounted Chinlock (Camel Clutch) Finishers: The Walk Off - A Pedigree, signaled by waving my right arm over my head in the baseball signal for "Home Run" One of the most feared and respected finishers in the SWF, this is one of those "everyone sells this" finishers. The Seventh Inning Stretch - A Standing Octopus Stretch, signaled by holding both arms over my head, my left hand showing four fingers and my right showing three. I don't use this often but I can get people to tap with it. I'll set it up by working the ribs and abdomen (obviously). Heavily edited 12-18-2003

here is a bump. I am closing this thread to prevent confusion. There should be a new stats thread up momentarily.

Crap. Darn. Fudge. frost has been one of my favorites for the past several months, and I wish he had his run at the top. Maybe when he is ready and comes back, he can take it to the next level.

Some of my favorites... Batman: Year One Spider-Man: Parallel Lives Spider-Man: Spirits of the Earth

Dmann - You went to WSU? My wife graduated from there and I did some time in the English department. Good place. Frost! Man! I was a little suprised to find out you were a comic guy a few weeks back, and now I discover that you are a movie nut too. I like you more and more every day. As for overrated movies, the first one that comes to mind for me is 12 Monkeys. Basically everyone I know talked about how great it was for weeks until I finally saw it. My reaction at the end? "The jerk didn't save anyone!" I guess I just wanted the film to have, you know, a point. It just irked me. As for all the Star Wars and Exorcist comments, I'll just say this. I think it has become "cool" in the past few years to dislike Star Wars because it is so popular. I grew up with it, and while I know it isn't "the greatest movie ever" it is still my personal favorite. How could you not like the quiet nobility of Obi-Wan during the movie? As for Exorcist, it is the only movie I have ever seen that genuinely scared me. Does that make me "a puss"? Don't think so. I just generally dislike "horror" movies, so I guess my tastes aren't as sophisticated as some. Finally, quite a few people a few pages back were really tough on Casablanca. I'm not sure why. It is one of those movies that has something for everyone, just a real classic. It is amazing the number of references you see to it in the course of a day or two. One of my favorites, and a great, great movie.

To get back to what started all of this, I just want to say I agree with Rando. I've been on quite a few message boards and gotten tired of them very quickly. This place is different. TheSmartMarks was there to take in those of us in the IGNWF (now the SWF) when IGN went insider. They gave us a place in the community and welcomed us with open arms. In retrospect, I am glad we came here. These boards are so much better than the snowboards we were used to, and the community here is a better one than over there (in general). In other words, thanks to everyone who keeps these things running and got this whole thing started in the first place. - "Grand Slam" Mark Stevens

I hear he's strictly rhythm though. Doesn't want to make it cry or sing.

Sounds like a plan to me.

That is a good point... this is just bad timing all around. I am going to assume that everyone's stats are good through the PPV. After that, as unofficial stats thread monitor, I will start a new one. I hope this doesn't tick off too many people, but I don;t see any other options. King? Edwin? Dames? You guys got any ideas?

I am curious about the relationships engine.Is it "in front of the cameras" or "behind the scenes"? For example, if we are "in kayfabe" I despise King with a passion. However, "out of kayfabe" he is one of my best friends.

Nope, it ain't what we call rock and roll.