Kaertos

(Comet) – Ladies, gentlemen, and good citizens of the world, welcome back to SWF Lockdown! As we prepare for yet our first tournament match of the evening, between William Hearford and Nathaniel Kibagami, we take you to an interview recorded just moments ago with reporter Ben Hardy and The Hville Thugg! ** Recorded Moments Ago ** A limo pulls to a halt just inside the Pershing Center parking garage, and the heavy set man jumps out of the driver’s side. As the driver walks to the passenger door, Ben Hardy runs up with his cameraman, Gus, on his coattails. (Hardy) – Hey! Is Thugg in there? (Driver) – Yes…let me get him out first. (Hardy) – Ok… The driver moves past the door to the trunk, where he opens it and pulls out Thugg’s wheelchair. He places the chair on the ground and opens it up to reveal the seat. He then opens the passenger door, and the first thing to hit the ground is a cane, which is used to help Thugg rise from the vehicle. An enormous roar can be heard coming from ringside as Thugg leans heavily on the cane as he moves to and sits down in the wheelchair. Once Thugg is situated, the driver closes the door and Ben Hardy approaches the less-than-enthusiastic HVT. (Hardy) – Thugg…do you have a moment? (HVT) – Yeah…what up? (Hardy) – Well, first and foremost, I want to thank you for rehiring me two weeks ago. I know I ratted the group out to King, and I appreciate your forgiveness. (HVT) – It’s all good yo…you’re weak…I know this. I knew that when I gave you the letters to deliver. King’s got control of you, and you’re too weak to break it. I ain’t gonna hold it against you. But, for real yo, I know you didn’t stop me to talk about that, so go ahead and ask me the question I know you wanna ask… (Hardy) – Ummm…ok…well, I think everyone’s been wondering for a little less than a week now…What is going to be your reaction to King’s statements on Storm about the stock each of you own? (HVT) – There’s nothing to talk about…he owns more stock. I tried to bluff him, and he caught me…that’s just the way it is. (Hardy) – But, what about King’s proposal to join him in a managerial role backstage? (HVT) – You mean work for him, don’t you? Cause that’s what it’ll be…as long as King has the power here, I ain’t gonna do shit on level with him. He’ll call the shots…and I’ll just be some nigga backstage cleanin’ up after wrestlers. You, and everybody else, knows I ain’t bout that…I ain’t gonna be nobody’s bitch! (Hardy) – But don’t you think it might be good for the talent to have you around…to give them some kind of a voice. (HVT) – Voice? You shittin’ me Hardy? What kind of fuckin’ voice can I have being King’s bitch? How can I demand that anyone listen to me or do what I say? If I join King…I’ll disappear backstage, never to be seen or heard from again. Tell me how that helps the cause…? (Hardy) – But how can you help if you leave? (HVT) – If I stay yo, I’ll just be something King will use against those people who stand up against him. I ain’t gonna be no weapon for that pussy…I ain’t gonna be the reason anybody here gets treated unfairly. (Hardy) – Then what do you plan to do? (HVT) – I don’t know Ben…I just don’t know. I been tryin’ to figure something out all week yo, but I ain’t got no answers right now. I tried to buy more stock, but them bitches ain’t sellin’…and that’s if I could even get the duckets to buy more…which I can’t! I already done gone broke buyin’ the 13% I got… (Hardy) – What about some of the talent…maybe they have something saved up? (HVT) – Yo, you’re one dumb fuck, you know that Hardy. Don’t you think I thought of that? King’s got that shit on lock…he instituted a policy stating that no current employee of the SWF can own stock. So that’s out…and the only person I can think of that could even possibly come up with the scratch to help a nigga out would be Strangler…and I ain’t gonna make him put his career on the line for this. (Hardy) – So, what? Just like that? It’s over? (HVT) – Who knows yo…maybe. I’m just here to see what’s poppin’ and waitin’ for a last minute miracle or something. Hardy glances at his feet for a moment, looking dejected and demoralized at the news that the movement will probably be over before it even begins. (Hardy) – Well, in light of all that…maybe you wanna talk about your condition for a moment…give everyone at home and idea of the state of your neck and why you’re in the wheelchair. (HVT) – Nah…I’m not really tryin’ to talk about that. The injury happened a long time ago, and I’m tryin’ to move past it if ya know what I’m sayin’. (Hardy) – But clearly, last week when you tried to Chokeslam King, it came back into play… (HVT) – I guess you can say that…I shouldn’t have done that. King just knows how to push a nigga’s buttons. (Hardy) – Well, it shocked us all to find out that you can actually walk, but then when you tried… (HVT) – I know what happened Ben…I was fuckin’ there. Look…I can walk, yes! But that’s about it. Aight…here’s the details…after the match with Bo, I had lost of surgery. The blow to my neck fucked up my spinal cord or some shit like that…it left me paralyzed from the waist down. They fixed it all up and shit, right, but they said my legs will never be the same. They said that they’re weak, and will always be weak…I can walk and shit, but I can’t do much else. They even said that I can’t be walkin’ very far…just like…to the bathroom or do the kitchen and shit. My legs would just get too weak and I’ll collapse…and they was like, “By all means, do not do any physical activity.” But, whatever…I wasn’t tryin’ to hear that…so, you saw…I tried to do it…and my legs just gave way. That’s the story…happy now? (Hardy) – No…I think I speak for all the talent…all the employees…all the fans when I say that it was painful to watch you collapse like that on national… (HVT) – Save that shit Ben! I ain’t even tryin’ to hear your sympathy kick…and I ain’t tryin’ to hear that shit from nobody else. It is what it is yo…and I’m straight. King’ll get his in time… (Hardy) – But what about… (HVT) – Yo man…I gotta bounce. I gotta go say bye to some people… Thugg begins to wheel himself towards the hallway leading inside the arena… (Hardy) – But Thugg…wait… But Thugg wheels himself inside without so much as another word to Hardy. ** End Transmission ** (Riley) – Wow… (Comet) – Wow indeed…Is this the last we’ve seen of Thugg? He made it clear that he won’t work for King… (Riley) – You mean with King, right? (Comet) – You heard what I said…so what’s next for Thugg? It seems the evildoer King is back on top and controlling the SWF…If Thugg leaves for good, like seems to be the case now, it will definitely be a huge blow to the movement to stop King. For that one day, there was an atmosphere in the locker room…of hope…and everyone seemed to think that with King out and Thugg in, things would be more fair and more fun around here. So now what? Who’s gonna save this fed now? It’s a disturbing situation here folks…who knows what’ll happen next. But for now, we’re gonna take a short break, so enjoy this public service announcement starring yours truly… Fade to PSA.

(Place this fairly early in the show please. No specific place.) “You’ve really gotten screwed over in this tournament—with that fast count by Eddy Long against Judge, after all the bullshit you went through, with that whole, wheel thing—” says ‘the Franchise’ Mak Francis, as he and his stablemate, CIA, make there way through the corridor. “And I’m not even booked for the show, surprising, eh Franchise.” CIA responds, as the get closer to the plaque that says ‘International Incident’. “Yo, I can’t wait to get my hands on that Show, guy!” says Francis, pumping his fist for emphasis, as CIA opens the door and enters. “Double Jeopardy has been nothing but trouble… first the tag titles, then costing us our matches—yo, I’m ready to make that big bitch tap like a chump.” ‘Click’ The Canadian mumbles ‘huh’, and Mak’s ears perk up, as he follows him into the room. Something is off, something is different. ‘Click—click’ ‘Click—click’ ‘…click…’ CIA flips the light switch once more, but nothing happens. The room stays fairly dark except for a low light drifting over the area, from the window… and a murmur. A sound catches the ear of ‘the Dream’, while Francis continues to strain, both men making out… words? “…You seek to take that which is not yours…” The low voice is proper, sophisticated, with a tinge of hate—no, cruelness perhaps? “…Your very lives are predicated upon the fact that you shine in my spotlight…” Mak looks around the dark room, only seeing shadows and the like. “What the…” he mumbles, as CIA takes a quick glance in the air and motions with his index and forefinger to continue moving. The voice speaks again; a slight change in inflection is evident. “…This action is unforgivable—I am in control, and I now know who you are…” After those last words, a small chuckle escapes from this unseen assailant. CIA has already deduced it must be a male, a person who he has heard speak before. It’s on the tip of his tongue, but actually finding the guy is more important, right now. “…By the time I’m through…” The two stablemates have covered the entire room and now stand perplexed in the center, wondering how someone could be speaking to them, and not be there. “…You will conform; my message will be heard…” And with that it occurs to both of them, as they finally spot the small black box. It’s a tape recorder… the vessel of a certain man. A man who has used it once before… but this time is different. “Sacred.” They say in unison. There is no inquisition, no suicide… “…And you will…” Only the promise of homicide, in a deep, yet violently calm growl. “…‘Join the Experiment’…” ------------------------------------------------------------- The arena is already dark as we return from a commercial break. Suddenly, fireworks explode around the arena, rafters and entrance ramp. The lights go out... "THIS IS MAH HOUSE!!" The pre-recorded voice echoes through the arena. Rammstein's 'Du Hast' plays without the lyrics. The heavy beats thunder throughout the arena. JD steps through the curtains, his head down. He walks to the top of the ramp, slowly raising his head. He lowers his head again, a malevolent smile plastered on his face. “Ladies and gentlemen, this match is scheduled for one fall. Currently making his way to the ring is the first competitor. Hailing from Vancouver, British Columbia, and weighing in at 243 pounds, this is his house….. JAY DAWG!!!!!!!!!” He enters the ring, placing his hands on his thighs, and slowly cricks his neck. Then steps back into the corner, and rests on the turnbuckles in wait for his opponent. “And his opponent….” The SmarkTron goes white with the blue words “SUPERIORITY COMPLEX” and “MAGNIFICENT SEVEN” on it. Then, with an explosion of blue pyro, “Kashmir” by Led Zeppelin bursts out over the loudspeaker. Tom Flesher emerges from the cloud of smoke, striding confidently to the ring as videos of his signature moves alternate in half-second clips with the words “SUPERIOR ONE,” “AWARD-WINNING,” “MAIN ATTRACTION” and “MAGNIFICENT SEVEN.” Flesher enters the ring and poses in the center head bobbing in time with the music, until the symphonic hook at 50 seconds in, which cues a machinegun-like burst of blue and white pyro from each corner. As the music fades, Funyon reads… “Ladies and gentlemen, the man currently in the ring has beaten his opponent twice before. As a matter of fact, he’s beaten just about everyone currently in the Smartmarks Wrestling Federation, all while losing fewer than two of every ten matches he wrestles. He expects tonight to be no different, because he is, quite simply, superior. Let’s hear it for ‘The Superior One,’ TOM FLESHERRRRRRRRRRRRR!” Flesher golf-claps for himself, ignoring the crowd's boos, and then strips off his warmup suit. He folds it, sets it in the corner and goes through a cursory stretch before the bell rings. DING DING DING!!!!!!! Flesher and Drazon move to the center of the ring. Each man stands at an angle, holding his arms to guard his upper body and exposing only half of his body to attack. “These two know what they’re in for,” says Bobby Riley. “They’re both trained in amateur fighting sports, Flesher in Greco-Roman wrestling and Jamie Drazon in the mixed martial arts. You won’t be seeing a fistfight out of these two.” “To the contrary, Citizen Riley,” replies Comet. “Tom Flesher and Jamie Drazon have seen so much of each other that they won’t be going through the motions. Nay, they’ll skip the formalities and move directly into beating on each other. Neither of them, you see, has seen the light of true justice. Neither has taken the side of Cyc-” “Yeah, yeah, we know,” grumbles Riley. “Just remember, they told you to hold it to once a segment. It’s driving away viewers.” “Poor misguided souls,” sighs Comet. Flesher and Drazon stare each other down for another second or so before Jay Dawg throws a quick Thai roundhouse kick straight at Flesher’s head! Flesher ducks, avoiding the blow by a hair. As Jay Dawg follows through with the kick, Flesher steps around and comes up behind him with a textbook duck-under. Flesher locks his hands around Drazon’s waist, and the crowd begins to cheer, anticipating a throwing battle already! Jay Dawg, however, has other plans. He drops down to the mat, hugging the canvas to keep Flesher from lifting him again, and then slides backwards between Flesher’s legs. Tom tries to keep his waistlock tight, but JD scoots backwards hard enough to break the grip. Tom stands up and turns around, but by the time he does, Jay Dawg is on his feet and throwing a sickening roundhouse kick! As a loud “CRACK!” echoes through the arena, his boot hits Flesher flush in the head, and the Superior One collapses to the mat! Jay Dawg drops onto him, and Eddy Long counts ONE!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KICKOUT! As the fans groan disappointedly, Tom Flesher gets a shoulder up and rolls, stupefied, to the side. “Jamie Drazon executes a Thai roundhouse kick,” calls Cyclone Comet. “Stunned and shaken by the force of the blow, it is all Tom Flesher can do to escape!” “Either that, or Flesher’s too tough to go down to one little kick,” replies Riley. “Come on, we’ve seen Flesher take worse and give it right back.” Flesher wallows on the mat for a moment, hazy from the kick. Jay Dawg seizes the opportunity to grab Flesher’s left leg and slam it to the mat, and Tom cries out in pain. He tries to crawl away, getting within a few inches of the ropes. Before he can reach them, though, Jay Dawg hooks his leg and dives forward, locking on an STF! The crowd pops loudly, even this early in the match, as Drazon tightens the deadly submission. Panicking, Flesher lunges forward, reaching and grabbing the ropes after only a few seconds! The fans groan, and Eddy Long administers the standard five-count to force JD to release the hold. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! Drazon breaks the STF just before the count of five, and the crowd applauds his grappling as Tom Flesher holds the ropes, trying to regain some semblance of mental order. “Clearly, Jamie Drazon has confounded the former SWF World Champion,” says Comet. “Even after their previous engagements, Citizen Flesher still has no way of reliably avoiding the effects of Jay Dawg’s superior striking, and that leaves him vulnerable to Drazon’s martial arts-influenced style of submission wrestling.” “There’s no way Drazon’s going to beat Flesher on the mat, though. Flesher owns him once they’re off their feet.” “Speaking from experience, my good man?” Comet deadpans. “He won’t be owning anyone, should he keep taking such vicious blows as Citizen Drazon is dealing out tonight.” Flesher gets to his feet and turns toward Jay Dawg, quickly throwing on a bodylock with one arm pinned. He steps in, trying to pressure Jay Dawg to his back with a classic Greco-Roman-style angle takedown. JD, however, recognizes the position and steps back, balancing and grabbing his own pinned-arm bearhug. Chest-to-chest, the two contenders jockey for position, each man trying to get in as close as possible and get the advantage. “This is a position both guys know well,” says Riley. “This over-under clinch position is present in every one of the combat sports. What Flesher and Drazon are doing is basically going back to basics to set up the rest of their arsenal.” Flesher steps in, swinging his left leg into Jay Dawg’s right to try to sweep him to the mat. JD sees it coming, however, and deftly bends his knee to avoid the sweep. As he does, Flesher breaks his grip and quickly throws a palm strike at Jay Dawg’s head. The Vancouver native pauses, caught off-guard. Flesher sweeps his leg through again, picking JD’s leg out from under him and sending him to the mat flat on his back! Flesher covers for ONE!!!!!!!!! But no more, as Jay Dawg kicks out with ease. “Definitely a mental advantage for Flesher,” says Riley. “He just baited Jay Dawg into doing just what he wanted him to do. That’s devastating for any wrestler, not to mention someone like Jamie who can barely work a zipper.” “Again, Bobby, I have to wonder if you’re speaking from experience.” Flesher stays on Jay Dawg, and JD responds by sliding backwards and bringing his legs up around Flesher’s stomach in the judo guard position. Flesher, recognizing the position as one that gives Jay Dawg the advantage, arches his back to try to break the scissors grip. Drazon’s legs, however, are too strong, and he easily keeps Flesher locked up. Flesher starts throwing surgically precise palm strikes, aiming for Jay Dawg’s neck and jaw to disorient him. Jay Dawg holds Flesher at a distance with the scissors grip and guards his face by blocking the palm blows with his forearms and deflecting them. Flesher throws one particularly hard shotei, extending his body for extra force. Jay Dawg deflects it regardless, taking advantage of Flesher’s bad position by sliding to the side and tightening the body scissors. Flesher, panicking, bellies down in an attempt to get away from his opponent. Jay Dawg pins Flesher’s arm to the mat and snakes his arm under Flesher’s shoulder in a half nelson, and the fans begin to scream their applause as they realize he’s going for the katahajime! Flesher realizes it too, and immediately clams up to keep Jay Dawg from getting a lock on. Knowing that the clam defense will only buy him a few seconds at best, Flesher reaches down and peels Jay Dawg’s ankles apart as quickly as possible, freeing himself from the bodyscissors. He turns in to face Jay Dawg, but quickly pulls away and jumps to his feet to avoid getting caught with a triangle choke. Jay Dawg grins from ear to ear and slowly stands up. “Look at the wicked countenance of the Hardcore Maniac, Bobby. Drazon knows full well that he’s beating the self-professed Superior One at his own game on the mat. Indeed, Flesher can clearly see it as well. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be running from Jay Dawg like a knave running from CYCLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE COMET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Riley simply sighs and mutters, “This wasn’t in my contract.” Jay Dawg follows Flesher to his feet. Without missing a beat, Flesher drops to his knees and hits a lightning-fast duck-under. He comes up behind Jay Dawg with his arms locked around his waist, but JD stays on his feet. Flesher pressures into him from behind, trying to take him to the mat to complete the technique. JD arches his hips out to break Flesher’s grip, but the Superior One reacts by popping his hips in and explosively arching his back! Before he knows what hit him, Jay Dawg is flying through the air, and Flesher unlocks his hands at the high point! Drazon falls like a rock, absorbing one of Flesher’s lethal released German suplexes! He lands hard on the back of his neck and rolls through onto his stomach. Flesher follows up with a brutal kneedrop, catching Drazon right on the back of the neck! The fans boo loudly as Flesher grandstands, dusting off his hands as if he’d actually accomplished something. “What a move by Flesher!” says Riley. “These two are wrestling back and forth, countering everything, but Flesher’s just got it all over him!” Flesher finishes working the crowd and sits down onto Jay Dawg’s back. JD pulls himself backwards, moving a few inches closer to the ropes. Before he can get very far, Flesher reaches down and hooks his chin. He sits back, draping Jay Dawg’s legs over his knees, and locks on a tight camel clutch! JD grimaces as Eddy Long drops down to ask him if he wants to submit. Flesher, meanwhile, leans back, an expression of casual enjoyment on his face as if he was sitting at the Suicide King’s minibar drinking a martini. “Flesher locks on the camel clutch, and his plan’s starting to come together,” says Riley. “They’re just throwing everything they have at each other. Flesher and Drazon have had such idiosyncratic matches, it’s impossible to come up with a plan for another match. They just need to go balls-out and go for broke.” “Idiosyncratic, Citizen Riley? What an odd choice of words.” “Yeah, ever since you came on the scene I’ve been trying to improve my vocabulary. Taamo even bought me a thesaurus.” Even as he writhes in pain, Jay Dawg reaches out with his legs, trying to extend one foot under the bottom rope. As he flails his leg around, he manages to hook his left boot over the bottom rope. He shouts, “MY FOOT’S ON!” Eddy Long stands up to look at the ropes. As he does, Flesher slides one hand out of the camel clutch grip and up to JD’s mouth. He bends the index finger and hooks it in the corner of his opponent’s mouth, fishhooking the soft part of the cheek out and smirking evilly as he does. Eddy Long sees that Jay Dawg has the bottom rope and counts ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! Finally, just before the five-count, Flesher pulls hard on his fishhook to elicit a scream from the Hardcore Maniac, then abruptly lets go. JD reaches up and sourly rubs his cheek as Flesher stands up, once again playing to the crowd. This time, he stands just in front of Jay Dawg, facing away, and mockingly brushes the dust off his shoulders. The crowd begins to cheer, and Flesher pauses, looking quizzically at them and wondering why they’d pop for his insults. His question is answered, though, when he feels Jay Dawg stand up behind him, lifting him onto his shoulders! The crowd’s cheering gets even louder as Drazon adeptly executes a half-turn, spinning and falling backwards to slam Flesher to the mat with an Electric Chair drop! Flesher hits hard, the wind knocked out of him. JD bridges, holding him for ONE!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!! KICKOUT! Flesher kicks out forcefully and quickly scoots to the side of the ring, grabbing the bottom rope. Jay Dawg follows him over, grabbing at his leg to try to drag him off the ropes. Flesher fights for a few seconds, and then THWACK~! “What a sickening display,” spits Cyclone Comet as Jay Dawg doubles over in pain. “That was, as my predecessor used to say, the ultimate in unethical treatment of the testicles.” “I didn’t see anything,” replies Riley off-handedly. “How could you miss such an egregious display of villainy?” “My monitor went out.” Flesher stands up, and Eddy Long comes over to reprimand him. Flesher simply waves his hand dismissively, as if to say, “Bah, leave me alone,” and matter-of-factly slaps Jay Dawg across the face. He follows that up with a stiff knee to the chest, then mockingly kicks him to the ground. He hits JD with a knee drop across the chest, then rolls him to his stomach. The fans boo as Flesher reaches down, locking his hands in the reverse waistlock used for the Ego Buster! “Remember,” says Riley, “this is the move that finished Jay Dawg the last time these two wrestled!” “And YOU remember, good sir, that it took two Ego Busters to put Citizen Drazon down for the count. In fact, he’s kicked out of the move before.” Flesher lifts him a few inches, but Jay Dawg hugs the mat and wraps his body around Flesher’s leg. Flesher fights, but Jay Dawg keeps countering. Finally, Tom gives up, and Jay Dawg seizes the opportunity to switch and grab Flesher for an Ego Buster of his own! Before he can lift him, though, Flesher catches JD by the head and pulls him down into a small package! Eddy Long counts ONE!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!! Jay Dawg kicks out! Tom gets to his feet a hair before JD and catches him coming up, then whips him to the corner! He follows close behind, lifting his boot and slamming into JD with a Yakuza kick! Drazon collapses into the corner as Flesher rebounds. Then, as he sits up, Flesher puts the boots to him! He throws kick after kick, slamming into JD over and over as the Hardcore Maniac sits helpless. Finally, Flesher jumps up, throwing a dropkick that catches his opponent flush in the face! He stands up, applauding himself as the crowd boos him! “I’ll tell you,” says Riley, “Flesher’s really got the upper hand here.” “Are you saying he’s on top, Robert?” “Why yes, he is. And I’d like him to stay there as long as possible.” “I’m sure you would, good sir.” Flesher grabs JD by the leg and drags him to the center of the ring, covering him for ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!! Jay Dawg gets to his feet, but before he can get his senses back, Flesher grabs him and whips him to the ropes! On the rebound, he catches JD and throws him overhead with a picture-perfect Railgun suplex! JD lands with a THUD, and Flesher rolls through. Before he can cover, though, Jay Dawg is getting back to his feet. Flesher steps in, grabbing JD tightly for another Railgun! Jay Dawg, however, grabs Flesher just as tight and steps around, reversing the momentum into an overhead suplex of his own! Flesher lands hard, and Jay Dawg covers for ONE!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KICKOUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “Jesus,” says Riley, “Flesher and Drazon are going a mile a minute here. If you were just watching the near-falls, you’d think this was an even match, when in fact Flesher’s just outclassing Jay Dawg by miles.” “Would that be the same Flesher laid out in the middle of the ring?” “He’s playing possum.” JD grabs Flesher’s leg, leaving the Superior One on his back. He hooks the leg and twists the ankle as he starts slamming stiff kicks into the hamstring. Flesher grimaces and writhes, but resists as JD tries to step over into a half-crab. Flesher kicks wildly with his free leg, finally getting JD to release him. JD backs off, and Flesher rolls to his knees. However, as he- WHACK! “Jay Dawg catches Flesher unaware with that roundhouse kick,” says Comet, “like a vile rogue caught unaware by the bastion of justice that is-” “You already used your allotment, Comet.” “Curses.” As Flesher flops to the mat, caught completely off-guard by JD’s roundhouse kick, the martial artist covers him for ONE!!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO! Flesher gets a shoulder up just in time to avoid the three-count! Jay Dawg stays on him, however, and stands up, pulling him into a standing headscissors. From there, he lifts Flesher up, holding him upside down for a few seconds before sitting out abruptly, slamming Flesher to the mat with a piledriver! Flesher bounces off the mat, then lands on his back once again. With that, Jay Dawg starts to cover… but then he looks up at the corner. As the fans see the SWF’s own Hardcore Legend look up at the turnbuckle, they begin to cheer louder and louder. Finally, he acquiesces. “Jay Dawg, heading to the top,” says Riley. “We don’t see this out of him very often, and with good cause.” “Nay, Robert, Drazon is willing to sacrifice his own body to put the exclamation point, the full-stop if you will, on a match. His swan-dive headbutt is about to put Tom Flesher into the abyss of a criminal who suffers my Falling Star Bomb!” Jay Dawg climbs slowly. As he does, the stunned Superior One starts to stir. JD gets to the top rope just as Flesher gets to his feet, and as Drazon pauses, Flesher lunges for the ropes! He grabs the top rope, shaking it violently, and Drazon falls crotch-first onto the turnbuckle! The crowd groans as JD grimaces. Flesher, meanwhile, sprints up the ropes, grabs JD under the arms and arches backwards, throwing him off the top rope and flat into the center of the ring! When he lands, though, Flesher stays down, still feeling the effects of the roundhouse kick and piledriver. “Citizen Flesher may have seen the worst of that avalanche Railgun,” says Comet with an air of concern. “After all, adrenaline will only carry you through so many acts of knavery.” “Jesus, would you please speak English?” After a few more seconds, Flesher manages to roll over and drape an arm over JD for ONE!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!! JD kicks out weakly, but Flesher grabs a deep breath and stands up. Jay Dawg rolls over, and Flesher grabs him from behind. He ducks his head under JD’s arm, locking his hands around the waist for a backdrop driver! Jay Dawg, however, feels the suplex coming and clamps down on the side headlock to keep Flesher from executing it. Flesher pulls back, trying to get out of the hold. JD loosens his grip slightly, allowing Flesher to pull away. Drazon then spins around, throwing a stiff kick straight into Flesher’s chest! Tom staggers backwards, trying to get his wind back. Jay Dawg throws a stiff right hand that Flesher manages to block, then follows up with a left hook that grazes the former World Champion. Flesher deflects the blow, though, and counters by driving a hard knee into Drazon’s gut! As JD doubles over, Flesher strings the left arm through his legs, locking on a pumphandle. Then, after tightening his grip on Drazon’s head, Flesher arches backwards with a loud kiai! Drazon doesn’t even know what hit him as he lands hard on his head, the victim of Tom Flesher’s Logical Disconnect! Flesher rolls through, covering Drazon for ONE!!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Eddy Long starts to call for the bell, but waves it off as practically everyone in the building screams at him to look at Drazon’s foot, draped over the bottom rope! Flesher stands up, looks at the foot on the ropes, and then shouts at Long to call for the bell. “Tom Flesher had this match won!” screams Bobby Riley. “Why the hell won’t Long call for the bell?” “Citizen Drazon is simply taking full advantage of the rules and the protection they afford him,” replies Comet calmly. “Flesher has done it on more than one occasion, as you’re aware.” “Yes, but when he does it it’s CUTE!” Meanwhile, Jay Dawg rolls to his stomach. He quickly, quietly gets to his knees, then reaches out and grabs Flesher’s ankle! He stands up with the leg, picking it our from under the Superior One, and then sweeps his leg out from under him! Flesher collapses to the mat, but immediately starts to stand up. Jay Dawg, seeing this, releases his leg and throws an exceptionally slow, sloppy kick to Flesher’s midsection. Working on instinct, Flesher catches it, then immediately ducks to avoid the inevitable enzuigiri. Jay Dawg, however, doesn’t throw the enzuigiri. Instead, he dives the other way, sweeping Flesher’s legs out from under him with a Judo-style flying scissors! Flesher collapses, not sure what just happened. Before he can figure it out, Jay Dawg locks on the body scissors once again! As the crowd chants “TAP! TAP! TAP!,” Flesher starts lunging for the ropes, reaching for any escape possible. Jay Dawg, meanwhile, reaches for Flesher’s head, looking for the katahajime! Flesher reaches down, peeling the bodyscissors apart, and stands up. JD kicks him hard in the lower back, buying himself some time to stand up as Flesher staggers toward the ropes. His chest bounces off the top cable, and Jay Dawg catches him on the rebound! He lifts Flesher up into a torture rack, and the crowd goes absolutely apeshit! “Here comes the Judgment Slam!” declares Comet declaratively. “The Olympic Slam variant that put Flesher down in the only match that Jay Dawg won against him!” Flesher, however, has other ideas. As Drazon lifts him into the air, he shifts his weight and rolls backwards out of the torture rack, landing harmlessly on his feet next to his off-balanced opponent! Taking any chance he can get, Flesher dives down to pick Jay Dawg’s ankle. JD avoids it, however, stepping back and pulling the ankle out of Flesher’s reach. As Flesher comes back up, he throws another sickeningly stiff Thai roundhouse kick! Flesher sees it coming, though, and ducks! This time he does grab the ankle, sweeping Drazon’s leg out from under him! Drazon bellies out, and Flesher goes to work on top. He grabs JD around the waist, dropping down for leverage. Drazon tries to slither out between Flesher’s legs as he did before, but Flesher lowers his grip and arches powerfully into the air! Once again, he unlocks his hands at the high point of the lift, letting Jay Dawg drop like a rock to the mat! JD rolls through to his stomach, knowing better than to stay on his back with Flesher in control. As Drazon raises his head, still dazed but trying to fight through it, Flesher drops down onto him and locks on a front headlock! He stands up, holding Jay Dawg tightly by the neck, and… waits. “Isn’t Citizen Long aware of what that contemptible thug is doing?!” asks Comet indignantly. “Oh, and white might that be?” “That choke is as flagrant as a henchman in a striped shirt and Lone Ranger mask!” “I don’t see anything.” Flesher keeps the hold, content to choke his opponent quietly out of consciousness and then hit a brainbuster for the win. Drazon, however, actively fights the hold. He shrugs, rolls his head, and does just about anything possible to try to loosen the choke. Long drops down, but sees only a front headlock, not an illegal choke. Angry at Long’s inability to see where the maneuver shifts from fatigue hold to choke, Drazon summons up the last of his strength and dives into Flesher’s hips! He locks his hands around Flesher’s waist, then arches back to throw him to the mat with a Northern Lights suplex! The crowd pops loudly, and Long counts ONE!!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Flesher gets a shoulder up! He rolls through, but Jay Dawg is already waiting for him! He drives his knee into the former World Champion’s stomach, doubling him over. With that, he reaches down and crosses Flesher’s arms across his neck. The crowd pops, seeing that it’s time for JD’s Revenge! “No, this isn’t fair!” screams Riley. “Flesher just had him! He was ready to choke him out!” “And you say you didn’t see anything.” “It’s an expression, dumbass,” says Riley, covering badly. “Yes, an expression of your inability to see what is right and just! An expression of the thousand blemishes on your character, Citizen Riley! An expression of your direct opposition to CYCLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE COMET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” “Shut up and call the match!” Flesher struggles as Drazon tightens the grip, ready to hit his gokuraku pedigree for the win! As they fight, Flesher spreads his arms out, creating enough space to pull his head out of the tight hold. He pulls away, keeping his hands locked with Drazon’s. He spreads Drazon’s arms out wide, then yanks them both to his right to set Jay Dawg out of position. Drazon tries to correct and regain his balance, standing up straight. Flesher seizes the opening, driving into him with a double-leg takedown that’s more like a football tackle! Jay Dawg pulls away, standing back up as Flesher gets his bearings back as well. Drazon stumbles toward the corner, and Flesher immediately swings into action, shooting another explosive double that sends JD right into the turnbuckles! “What a takedown!” says Riley. “That’ll knock the wind right out of you!” Jay Dawg staggers out of the corner, and Flesher sweeps his leg out from under him. Rather than covering him, though, Flesher reaches down, locking his hands in a reverse waistlock. The crowd begins to boo, and Flesher lifts Drazon high into the air. Riley shouts, “EGO BUSTER! COME ON, TAAMO, PUT HIM AWAY!” Flesher stalls for a few seconds, and then BAM!!!!!!!! dumps Jay Dawg flat onto his head! JD nearly folds in half with the force of the Russian neck drop, and Flesher confidently covers for ONE!!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!! The crowd explodes as Jay Dawg gets a shoulder up to once again avoid being put down by the Ego Buster. Flesher’s jaw drops, and he sits on his knees for a few moments, dumbfounded. Jay Dawg, meanwhile, rolls instinctively to his stomach, not sure exactly what to do. “HOW COULD THAT NOT END THE MATCH?!” screams Riley. “He’s been beating Jay Dawg from pillar to post!” “Citizen Drazon is one exceptionally resilient athlete, Robert,” replies Comet. “Besides, he HAS kicked out of that maneuver before. It should come as no surprise, just as it comes as no surprise that the SWF has renewed their endorsement contract with Pepsi-MAX!” Flesher, sighing and looking emotionally defeated, rolls onto Jay Dawg. As if he’s phoning in yet another fatigue move, he stands over the supine Hardcore Maniac and reaches under his hips, locking up another waistlock. Instead of dropping his hips for leverage, though, he simply tries to muscle Jay Dawg into the standing position necessary for the German suplex. Jay Dawg fights against it, hugging the mat and sliding backwards between Flesher’s legs. He tries to wriggle free again, but this time Flesher bends his elbows and catches Drazon under the arms! He cocks his right arm up hard, locking on an airtight half-nelson! With that, he steps off Drazon’s back, making it easy to pull him to a standing side-by-side position! “Could it be….?” asks Riley, as Flesher quickly swings his right leg forward, and then kicks it back forcefully! He falls forward, driving Jay Dawg face-first into the mat with a half-nelson forward Russian leg sweep! “YES! JOKERS WILD! JOKERS WILD!!!!!!!!” “Yes, a villain like Flesher WOULD cheat at cards….” “SHUT UP AND CALL THE MATCH!” Jay Dawg nearly bounces off the mat, and Flesher quickly rolls him to his back. Careful to hook the leg, Flesher cradles his opponent for ONE!!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DING DING DING!!!!!!!!!! Flesher leaps to his feet, and Eddy Long raises his hand. “Your winner,” says Funyon, “‘the Superior One,’ TOM FLESHERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!” “What a barnburner!” says Riley. “And in the end, Tom Flesher once again takes out Jamie ‘Jay Dawg’ Drazon! What do we have next, Comet?” “More Smartmarks Wrestling action, more evildoers, more bastions of justice, and more CYCLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE COMET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” “God da-” Fade to commercial.

As the opening displays fade away and the Lockdown set comes back into view as the camera pans about to the commentary position where Bobby Riley and Cyclone Comet sit, eyeing the ring and waiting for the opening match up. Riley: "Welcome to SWF Lockdown fan, proudly supporting The Suicide King in kicking Thugg's crippled ass! " Comet: "Citizen Riley, that's disgusting. I, Cyclone Commmmmeeeetttt, will personal deal justice out to you if you don't stop making such vile remarks." Riley: "Sure you will Comet. Then I'll start batting for the other team." Comet: "I'm sure some of the guys in the back would comment about you being a bat boy. I have no idea what they mean of course." Just then, the arena drops into darkness as the soft opening towns of Burn In Hell start to roll out, the opening lines echoing around. YYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! BONG! BONG! BONG! YOU'RE GONNA BURN IN HELL! A shower of flames explode from the entrance way, as Crow and Dante step out onto the stage. Crow drags down his cigarette before throwing it away over the stage before strutting down towards the ring, Dante Crane following right behind him. Funyon: "Making their way to the ring at this time, at a combined weight of four hundred and forty ones pounds, the team of 'SICK BOY' DANTE CRANE and the 'ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR' CROW!" Slipping off his trench coat and handing it over to the Time Keeper, Dante slides into the ring, posing on the turnbuckles as Crow climbs the apron and throws his arms out to the crowd. The two Goths pace around the ring slowly, exchanging words and waving on the fans as they weight for their opponents. Funyon: "And their opponents, weighing in at a total of five hundred and fifty seven pounds ... representing the UNHOLY TRINITY ... DACE 'HORRORCORE' NIGHT and VA'AIGA!" YYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! Once more the lights drop out as smoke pours up from the stage, as red laser lights flare into life. As red lights pick out shapes in the smoke, the music kicks into life. LET FREEDOM RING WITH A SHOTGUN BLAST! As a burst of pyro fires off, Va'aiga and Dace stride through the smoke, seeming to move in slow motion through the strobing laser lights. Making their way to the ring, they climb onto the apron, raising their arms up to the cheering fans, as Va’aiga sports his New Zealand All Blacks Rugby top, numbered 50, to take a little dig at his Australian opponent. TRIN-IT-E! TRIN-IT-E! TRIN-IT-E! Climbing through the ring ropes, the Maori Badass and Horrorcore exchange nods with Crow, in respect to their past encounters in the SJL, before eyeing up the relatively unknown Dante Crane slowly. Edging towards each other, they extend hands and shake in the middle of the ring. Soapdish ushers the two teams back into their corners as Va'aiga and Sick Boy step out onto the apron and grasp the tag ropes. Dace taps his nose and points to Crow as the Antichrist Superstar flips him off with a smile. Riley: "Damn this respect stuff, I want a good dirty fight with action. And what the hell is with this tapping the nose stuff? Are they all setting someone up? If they are King will fire their tight asses!" Comet: "Citizen Riley, really, just relax and enjoy a good honourable fight between two teams." Riley: “Say, didn’t Va’aiga and Crow have some big feud back in the SJL over the Title Belt down there?” Comet: “I wouldn’t know, I wasn’t around then Citizen Riley.” Riley: “Bah, it’s the SJL, no one cares.” DING, DING, DING! RRRRRAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! Circling the centre of the ring, hoping from one foot to the other, Crow and Dace eye each other up and down slowly, not diving in two quickly. Throwing his weight back suddenly, the Gothic Warrior bounds himself off the ropes with Night breaking to a charge after him. Crow slams himself full speed into Dace, trying to drive him back with speed and surprise, but Night holds firm, shifting his arms and throwing Crow across the ring back towards the ropes. Drilling him on the way back with a boot into the gut, Dace follows it up with a stiff knee into chest. Lifting Crow back to his full height, the Hardcore Goth swings back and nails the edge of his hand into the Aussie's chest. SMACK! WWWOOOOOOOOOOOO! SMACK! WWWOOOOOOOOOOOO! SMACK! WWWOOOOOOOOOOOO! The force of the chops drives Crow backwards across the ring and into the ropes once more as he struggles to get his breath back. Riley: "Very slow start, Dace feeling out a man he hasn't wrestled in a long time, guess he's playing better safe than sorry against someone that could still see some of his favourite spots coming." Grabbing the Antichrist Superstar by the wrist, Night shoots him off and drags him straight back in, swinging his free arm right at Crow's neck. Duck at the last moment, the Aussie keeps his head, slipping behind Dace into a Rear Waistlock. Not pausing for a moment, Crow spins Night around and unloads a swift serious of right hands into the fellow Goth's face, staggering him backwards, before driving a boot into his midsection, driving the air out of Dace's lungs. Clamping on a Front Facelock, the Goth Warrior slings one of Dace's arms over his shoulders and snaps his body backwards, taking him over into the canvas with a Snap Suplex. YYYYYYAAAAAHHHHHH! Comet: "Crow fights back with a good honest Snap Suplex, just what I like to see." Riley: "It's not the sort of action I like to see." Rolling over with the Snap Suplex, Crow pulls Dace back into a sitting position with him, springing back onto his feet before launching himself forwards, driving both his feet into Night's face with a sound that thuds around the arena. SMACK! OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Taking a handful of sleeve and arm, the Antichrist Superstar hauls Dace back up onto his feet. Swinging his body around, throwing his leg out and arching his back, Crow aims a huge Roundhouse Kick at Night's head. SWOSH! But it flies over head as Dace flings his body forwards, ducking under the blow and wrapping one arm around Crow's midsection drives him backwards, slamming him into the nearest set of turnbuckles. CRACK! Following it up with a skull ringing Elbow Smash, Dace stuns Crow for a moment before dragging him down into a Front Facelock and with a quick back step, spike's Crow into the mat with a DDT. Va'aiga grins on approvingly from his corner as Dante stares on with little expression. OOOOOHHHHHHHH! Riley: "Crow mistimes and costs him, as Dace fights back with a DDT. Oh, the days when there where people you could back in a fight." Comet: "I wonder how much long it'll be before these guys really start to open you their full powers?" Picking Crow back to his feet, the Hardcore Goth drills a knee into his chest once again then sharply swings him around, looping an arm between his legs and grabbing his waist, Horrorcore hauls Crow overhead and drives him back into the mat with a Backdrop Suplex. RRRRAAAAAHHHHHH! Riley: "Come on, break out some real action please or get this over with. And Comet don't you dare!" Comet: "Dare what? Make a good call like this? ... BBBAAACCCKKKDDDRRROOPPPPAAAAHHHH!" Riley: "Oh god no. Never work with children, animals or Superheroes." Rolling over, keeping his grip on Crow, Dace turns around into his corner and launches the Aussie Goth chest first into the turnbuckles as Crane winches slightly at the impact. Leaning over, Dace smoothly tags in the Maori Badass. YYYYYYAAAAAAHHHHHHH! The Unholy Trinity members drag the dazzled Crow from the corner, to swiftly level him with a huge Double Lariat, driving him down into the mat. Dace slips out onto the apron as Va'aiga hooks Crow's leg for a cover while Soapdish slides into place. ......ONE! .....TWO! Kickout! RRRRAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! Dante takes a tight grip on the top rope, ready to spring in to make the save at the moment it’s needed. The Maori Badass wrenches Crow back to his feet and immediately unloads a series of stiff Right Hands into the Goth Warrior’s head with brain rattling force. Wrapping his huge arms around the shaken Crow, Va’aiga arches his body backwards launching Crow through the air and across the ring with a Belly to Belly Suplex. Quickly back to his feet, the Maori Badass drops into a crouch, patting his shoulders as the Antichrist Superstar staggers back to his feet. Riley: “Double Lariat, right into those horrible big Right Hands then a Belly to Belly Suplex. How mid Mark ever keep up with his job…” Comet: “.. Hard work, dedication, honour and practiced skills..” Riley: “Quiet Comet, he didn’t, he got his ass fired!” Breaking into a bull like charge, Va’aiga ramps himself full speed and shoulder first into Crow’s midsection, drilling the Aussie Goth into the turnbuckles with impact then sends all the air in Crow’s lungs whooshing out. WE FELT THAT ONE! WE FELT THAT ONE! WE FELT THAT ONE! Keeping hold of Crow, the big Maori shifts his arms downwards, locking them around the Goth Warrior’s legs, standing up and dropping backwards, sending Crow plummeting face first into the ring canvas. Flipping Crow over and hooking his leg, pulling it away from the nearby ropes, Va’aiga makes the cover as Soapdish slides into place. ……ONE! …..TWO! …..1/4! …NO! OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH! Riley: “Dante Crane breaks up the cover!” Comet: “He had his partner’s back, breaking up the cover in the right time and the right way.” The Sick Boy steps backs and quickly returns to his corner as Va’aiga shrugs off the blow to his back and drags Crow by the arms towards the middle of the ring, pulling him to his feet as he goes. Forcing him over into a Standing Headscissors. Wrapping his arms around Crow, the Maori digs his heels into the mat, dragging the Gothic Warrior up into the air. Spreading his legs for support, Va’aiga throws Crow down, releasing him with a hard Powerbomb into the mat, dropping down after him, grabbing a leg to make another cover. ……ONE! ……TWO! ……1/4! ……1/2! NO! Leaping across the ring and slamming his whole body into Va’aiga, Dante Crane breaks up the pinfall. YYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! Riley: “Dante breaks up the pinfall from the Powerbomb again! Now, when he starts cheating, I’ll start carring.” Sliding out of the ring to the outside and pacing back around to his corner, Dante keeps his eye on the action as the Maori Badass shrugs his shoulders, shacking off the impact and dragging Crow back to his feet once more. Grabbing the back of the Antichrist Superstar’s head, bellowing his lungs out, the Maori races across the ring, dragging Crow with him and slams his face into the top turnbuckle his bone crunching force. SMACK! RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! Locking his arms around Crow’s waist, Va’aiga lifts him up from the mat, but instead of taking him over, bumps him forwards, straddling him on the top rope, facing out of the ring. Slipping through the ropes onto the apron, the Maori Badass climbs the turnbuckles from the outside. Riley: “Va’aiga set Crow up on the top rope and climbs the turnbuckles. Oh god, what is he planning?” Comet: “Whatever it is, it’s sure to be entertaining to all these great fans.” Setting himself up, perched between the top and middle ropes, Va’aiga reaches an arm over Crow’s shoulders and forces the other one between the legs. Riley: “OH GOD NO! He’s going to try for a Super Maori Drop! It’s bad enough when he does a normal one, last thing we need is one from the top rope!” OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Feeling the sheer danger of his position , about to take the same move that cost him his SJL World Title to Va’aiga so long ago, Crow desperately tries to fight back, nailing rapid series of Right Hands into the Maori’s head. Lacing his legs around the ropes, Crow tries to cling of for dear life as Va’aiga tries to haul him up into place as Dace and Dante both look on, ready to leap in at any second. Slamming his left hand into Va’aiga ribs over and over. Releasing his legs from around the ropes suddenly, Crow springs to standing on the top rope, slamming a knee into the Maori’s face on the way up and locking his arms around Va’aiga’s head and launching himself backwards off the top rope, drags Va’aiga down with him, spiking his head into the mat. HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! Riley: “MURDEROUS DDT FROM THE TOP ROPE! Please tell me this is over! We need commercials now!” Comet: “What a feet, what a move! This is the great things the fans want to see!” Both then lay sprawled out on the mat, breathing and not doing much else, as Soapdish starts to count them down, and Dante and Dace beat the crowd up into a storm. STOMP! STOMP! STOMP! STOMP! STOMP! STOMP! ONE! TWO! THREE! GET UP! GET UP! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! GET UP! GET UP! SEVEN! EIGHT! Grunting this effort, Va’aiga rolls over and starts to crawl towards his corner for the tag out to Dace Night. NINE! Slowly turning over, Crow drags himself along the mat, inch to inch towards his corner as Dante reaches out for him. Comet: “Here they go for the tag. That man that makes his first could get a massive advantage!” Va’aiga reaches…. Crow reaches….. Va’aiga reaches….. Crow strains…. Dace leans over the ropes, reaching out as far as he can…. Crow strains…… …….. and makes the tag! SLAP! YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! Va’aiga tags Dace in a split second later as Dante springs over the ropes and races across the ring at top speed. Springing into the air, diving onto Dace’s shoulders, swinging his body backwards, flinging Dace overhead across the mat with a Flying Headscissors. Va’aiga staggers slowly to his feet only to be sent FLYING into the corner, as Dante leaps back to his feet and rushes across the ring with a flying leg lariat! Va’aiga is left slumped against the turnbuckles. DAAAAAAAAN-TAAAAAAAAY DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN-TAAAAAAAAY Comet: The fine and upstanding fans of the SWF are torn between which of these dynamic competitors to support Riley: And they’re ALL wrong. I find it hard to support ANY of these guys. Dace struggles to regain his footing as Dante kips up again and smashes a spinning front leg crescent kick across the head of the High Priest of Horrorcore. Dace staggers backwards a few steps and Dante wheels with the motion and smacks Dace again, this time with a spinning BACK leg crescent kick. Dante stops his motion facing away from Dace and digs his elbows out backwards, planting the points of both into the ribs of the Horrorcore one. Dace wobbles backwards again and the Sick Boy springs backwards in the space this creates and hits a REVERSE version of his Crane Kick, sending Dace into the opposite corner to his tag partner! Riley: It looks like Dante is on fire at the moment. Comet: Of course not literally on fire, for that would be a power that only those greatest of heroes could deal with. Dante Crane looks back across at Va’aiga and stopping to lash another masterfully placed kick into the sternum of the slumping Dace Night, the young Canadian spins on a dime and rushes across the ring, dropkicking Va’aiga HARD in the solar plexus, causing the massive Maori to flop forward out of the corner. Dante flips Va’aiga over and covers… and referee Soapdish waves him off. Riley: Elementary error by Dante Crane there, not covering the legal man. Comet: Referee Soapdish upholding the law, like any good citizen should. He’s a shining example to the children. Riley: He sets an example by hoisting his leading leg up for extra height? Comet: What? Riley: Well it’s a shining.. umm… you know, like a shining move.. err.. never mind. Crane leaves the fallen Maori to his own devices and turns his attention back to Dace Night, still resting against the corner post. Rushing in Dante baseball slides down and drop toe holds Dace out of the corner, sending the 250-plus pounder down to the mat face first. With the lightning quickness of a cat with a bottle rocket shoved up it’s behind, Dante leaps to the top rope and flies off, dropping gracefully back first into a senton bomb across Dace Night’s back. Dante springs back to his feet again and signals out to the crowd! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHHHH! Riley: It looks like Dante Crane is planning something evil for Dace Night. Comet: Something EVIL? HE MUST BE STOPPED BY GOD! Dante lifts Dace off the canvas and looks out to the crowd, who cheer wildly in appreciation as he sets himself up behind his Unholy Trinity opponent and meticulously slides first one, then his other arm underneath the arms of Mr. Horrorcore. Taking a deep breath in and summoning up all his energy Dante leans back and attempts to lever his Birmingham born opponent over, but Dace is just a little too big to budge. Dante takes a second to compose himself and attempts again, but again suplexing over Dace Night proves a little beyond the powers of Dante. Riley: Dante Crane looks like he’s trying to Ethereal Suplex Dace Night! There’s no WAY he can hit his finisher on the Horrorcore one. Dante, still keeping the full nelson locked in tight on Dace, looks over to his corner and nods to Crow who hops over the top rope walks over to the neutral corner where the Full Nelson was set up out of. Dante locks his hands as tight as they will go as crow fires off Das Wunderkick and DANTE USES THE MOMENTUM TO ETHEREAL SUPLEX DACE NIGHT! HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT! Dante bridges and holds Dace’s shoulders down to the mat as Soapdish drops to count… ONE! TWO! THRE… NO! Two count only as Va’aiga leaps forward from his position on the mat, disturbing the bridge with a solid shoulder and sending both Dante Crane and Dace Night to the mat in a crumpled heap, leaving the three wrestlers lying there. Soapdish orders Crow out of the ring and the talented Australian walks over to the corner and steps through the ropes, and as Va’aiga gets up off the mat he gets ordered promptly out of the ring as well. Riley: Soapdish is at least restoring some order in this match. Comet: Through the fury and chaos, order will always reign supreme. Dace, still lying on the mat, rolls a little away from Dante Crane to get a little space to recover as the Canadian shakes free his arms a little, grimacing a little, maybe semi-regretting expending so much energy and placing so much strain on his arms as the after effects of Dragon Suplexing a wrestler the size of Dace Night over. Dante looks down at Dace and sees that the high priest of Horrocore is STILL slumped near lifeless on the canvas, and the Sick One drops to cover again, exploiting the weakness of Dace… ONE! TWO! THR… and Dace Night just manages to kick out under his own power. Riley: A close call for Dace Night there as the effects of that Dragon Suplex nearly knocked out the big dumb ox. That could have even knocked out the bigger, dumber ox in the corner over there. Dante stands again and waits for Dace to stagger to his feet before firing off a lightning fast nowashigiri sequences, balancing on one leg and firing off three lightning speed kicks, first to Dace’s shin, then to his ribcage and finally to the head of the Trinity member. Dace nearly overbalances backwards, and Sick Boy capitalises by arching his leg over the top of Dace’s head and spinning round, pivoting on his previous kicking leg and hitting a smooth back kick to Dace’s ribs! DAAAAAAAAAAN-TEEEEEEEEEEEEY DAAAAAAAAAAAAN-TEEEEEEEEEEY Comet: I’m impressed by the balance and poise of Dante Crane. Firing off those roundhouse kicks without putting his legs down takes some ability. Riley: He could almost use the Crane stance… Dante grabs the staggering Dace and whips the master of Horrorcore into the ropes, waiting for the rebounding Brummie to get back within range before turning away from him and fires another kick away at the rear of Dace’s legs, dropping Dace to his knees. Dante rushes the ropes on the opposite side and flips over Dace, taking him down backwards with a neck snap, rolling through and stretching full body length to tag the recovered Crow! Crow leaps keenly over the top rope and adds a few stomps away at the fallen Dace. Riley: Enough of this fancy kicking business. Stomping on a guy is more what we want to see. Proper wrestling tactics. I only have one regret. Comet: Which is? Riley: He’s not going for the GROIN damnit. Crow sizes up Dace and, stopping briefly to fire a baleful glance over to his former nemesis Va’aiga, Crow picks Dace up slowly off the canvas, beckoning Dante over for a double team as Soapdish puts on the mandatory five count for Dante to clear the ring. Dante fires off a snap kick into the ribs of Dace and the massive Brummie superstar is bent double, and the pair lock arms around the head of Dace Night and whip him over with a double vertical suplex. Dante grabs Dace and the pair lift and whip Dace into the ropes, stopping him dead with a double back elbow to a gut and allowing Crow to flatten him with a DDT as Soapdish orders Dante Crane back to his corner. Crow drops to cover but Soapdish is a little slow coming to count… ONE! TWO! TH.. and Dace kicks out. Riley: You know if Soapdish had been there straight away that could have been three. I’m not sure justice was done… Comet: Justice? JUSTICE???? What would YOU know about justice? Riley: Well I once got charged for… hey wait! Let’s just call the match, ok? Crow drops a leg across Dace’s chest and lifts him off the canvas again, springing athletically off the mat and knocking Dace down with an impressive standing dropkick. Crow drops to the mat with another leg drop and floats round to a front chancery, lifting Dace off the mat at he stands himself and flipping Dace over like a burger with a suplex. Crow floats through with the suplex and holds for a cover… ONE! TWO! THR… and Dace kicks out. Crow curses to himself and grabs for an arm of Dace, whipping the Horrocore One as he stands into the Crow/Crane corner. Crow bounces off the second rope and up onto Dace Night’s shoulders, and Dante reaches up to blind tag forcefully on Crow’s lower back, sending Crow rolling through with a victory roll, but Crow rolls through a little further, leaving him seated on top of Dace, pinning him in place as Dante slingshots into the ring with a rolling senton! Dante leaps off Dace and bounces off the second rope one way near the corner with a springboard moonsault rolling through to end clear of Dace, and Crow bounces off the adjacent second rope moonsaulting FLAT LEVEL on Dace with a quebrada of his own. Comet: The pair of Crane and Crow sailing through the air with graceful ease there, demonstrating their high flying prowess. Riley: Can you fly, hero boy? Comet: Well I’m capable of making people who annoy me fly GREAT DISTANCES. Riley: Umm… Great high flying offence from Dante and Crow there… Dante Crane looks down at the limp form of Dace on the ground near the corner and nods over to Crow, and Crow points up to the top rope then makes his trademark crucifix pose! Crow steps briefly outside the ring and leans in to tag himself in as Dante drags Dace dead center of the ring. Dante steps up to the top rope in a neutral corner and looks across to Crow who ascends quickly to his OWN top turnbuckle, and faces out to the audience, arms out to his sides. The crowd drops to near silence anticipating something BIG about to happen… Riley: This looks like something that Crow and Dante Crane have planned. This looks like curtains for Dace Night, and another loss for the Unholy Trinity …and Dante leaps off the top rope planting Dace with the Cure top rope head BUTT! Dante rolls away from Dace as Crow leaps blind off the top rope with an Evenflow Moonsault… at least that was the implied idea as Dace uses his last ounces of strength to grab hold of Dante Crane and hold him in position, and as Dante struggles to get away, Crow’s moonsault hits HIS TAG TEAM PARTNER INSTEAD! Crow lands in a heap himself, as the landing on stacked bodies wasn’t what the flying goth was prepared for. HO-LY-SHIT! HO-LY-SHIT! HO-LY-SHIT! Riley: If that Moonsault had hit Dace that would have been it, goodnight, goodbye, see ya, don’t write, don’t call, don’t ask us to pay your hospital bills. Now all we have is a big pile of bodies. Comet: But can Dace get to the his own corner before the fallen fliers recover? Or will NONE of them survive? Soapdish puts on a double KO count on Crow and Dace, and the crowd count along as the three men struggle to their feet in the Gothic case, and the stretch to his corner in the case of Dace! ONE! TWO! Dante gets to one knee…. THREE! FOUR! Crow gets to one knee and Dante gets to a vertical base, only to be met my a point to his corner by Soapdish. Dace edges nearer his own corner. FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! Crow stands, groggily. Dace edges nearer still. EIGHT! NINE! TE.. Crow realises what’s going on and launches a despairing dive towards the legs of Dace, but the outstretched arm of the High Priest of Horrorcorse just touches his Maori tag partner’s arm, and Soapdish signals for a legal tag! Va’aiga hops over the top rope as Crow stands, just in time to get FLATTENED by a massive running tackle! Realising the peril his partner is in Dante turns and heads across the ring to try to head Va’aiga off, only to be NAILED as Va’aiga kips up and rushes HIM, Pancaking the Canadian Cruiserweight with a second running tackle! Crow staggers to his feet and turns to face the onrush of the pumped up and powerful Maori, extending his arm to it’s fullest and nearly taking Crow’s head off with the EVIL, NASTY, WINCE-INDUCING, SEND YOUR GRANNY OUT THE ROOM – HER GENERATION ISN’T USED TO THIS LEVEL OF VIOLENCE LAAAAAAAAARIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH! AAAAAAAH YEAAAAAAH! VA-ING-UH! VA-ING-UH! VA-ING-UH! Va’aiga turns to Dante Crane and before the Canadian has even come CLOSE to reacting the massive Maori fires a shot across the bows in the form of a stiff left cross punch right into the Gothic one’s face. ONE! Dante reels backwards from the shock of the blow only to be greeted with a second left cross, equally laced with venom and fury. TWO! Dante staggers backwards again, and again Va’aiga fires a third deadly left cross, lashing across the face of Dante THREE! Struggling to keep his footing, Dante leans back across the ropes, trying to steady himself, as Va’aiga leans backwards, draws his right fist to his mouth and offers it a little kiss for luck… ooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH …and SMASHES a hooking right uppercut square onto the chin of Dante Crane sending the Sick Boy flying over the top rope and spilling him to the outside. BOO-YAH! Va’aiga stands in the middle of the ring and screams out to the crowd, before turning his attention back to Crow and letting out a grunted insult to his former arch-nemesis… Va’aiga: Hoahriri parawai… Va’aiga walks over slowly and deliberately to Crow, teeth gritted and picks up the fallen Avian. Glaring deep into Crow’s eyes, Va’aiga lifts Crow up over his shoulder and powerslams Crow down to the mat HARD! Va’aiga looks across to his corner and flashes a querying look at Dace, who given a short amount of time to rest and recuperate shows confidence in his ability for just one more move by nodding his head, and Va’aiga turns to the crowd and for the first time in a LONG time in the match, the Maori Badass flashes a smile as he draws his hand slowly across his throat… Riley: You know what that sign is? Comet: It’s time for the… Both (Comet enthusiastically, Riley with more than a hint of disapproval): DECAPITATOR! Va’aiga tags in Dace and the High Priest of Horrorcore steps over the top rope gingerly, still hurting from the beating he took earlier. Va’aiga whips Crow into the ropes and catches Crow in position as the Gothic Avian rebounds into him. Va’aiga lifts Crow up and CRUNCHES Crow down to the mat with a huge Inverted Powerbomb as Dace Night fires the big axe kick across the back of Crow’s neck! Dace collapses on top of the fallen Crow as Dante steps onto the ring apron, trying to enter the ring an interfere… and Va’aiga SPEARS DANTE OFF THE APRON THROUGH THE ROPES! Soapdish leaps down to count the cover… ONE! TWO! THREE!!!!!! Comet: THE UNHOLY TRINITY WIN! Riley: Well of course that’s what I predicted? Comet: You did? Riley: Well of course. You should learn by now I’m always right. And as we leave the celebrations of Va’aiga and Dace Night, we’re going to have to cut to a commercial, folks. The SWF will be right back. ::fade out::

I will be posting the schedule through the end of the year later this week, after CC has had a chance to review it and make sure it all fits. And if it makes anyone feel any better, I have the schedule for 2004 more or less done and ready to be typed into a new schedule post later in the year. Yes Ladies and Gentlemen, I can say with some confidence that Genesis V will be held on Sunday, September 19, 2004. Plan your vacations accordingly.

And updated with the build to our last "real" PPV of the year, Ashes 2 Ashes.

Jack Daniel's Sour - Basically just Jack & sour mix over ice. Good stuff. I'm also a big fan of Malibu rum mixed with Pineapple juice. As far as straight liquor, I like Jack, Cuervo and Goldschlager.

When I get a chance, I will throw together a banner for us, although I can't do animated. Probably be late Tuesday before it is finished.

King made me change the logo. Seems he didn't like the "Voyage Home" subtitle. The new one is linked to in a post above. Oh, and your bracket on the Genesis page (which is spiffy as hell, by the way) is missing the last round of the loser's bracket, where the losers of the final three way in the winner's bracket fight the last remaining person from the loser's bracket for the shot at the winner of the winner's bracket.

For every great 3 hour movie there is a crappy three hour movie. length alone does not make a picture good. To prove that, I give you "Gods and Generals".

One of the reasons people were so suprised FotR made so much bank was that it had significantly less showings than the 2nd place movie. Every theater was packed.

You can pretty quickly and easily stabilize the picture and sharpen it up a little, maybe a little color-correction, but that's about it without big $$ programs.

No, I do understand the difference. And there are two things I want to say here, one of them is probably pretty realistic and the other is, admittedly, very cynical, snarky and somewhat mean. The first point is pretty simple really. I remember an interview with Peter Jackson where he says the reason they call them "Extended Editions" and not "Director's Cut" or "Special Editions" is that there is nothing wrong with the theatrical editions of the movie. They are, in fact, the movies he wanted to make. He knew in advance about the three hour running time and edited the movie accordingly. When the chance came to release all of the stuff they really wanted in a new edition of the movie, he did so. This doesn't invalidate the theatrical cut, make them any less significant or make the "Extended Edition" the difinitive edition. I guess I am just tired of having other DVD fans say I am "stupid" for buying this DVD. As I said, I have no regrets from buying the first Fellowship DVD. Oh well... The other comment I thought of, the meaner of the two, comes from being a little defensive about not only my DVD buying habits, but my favorite movies, the Star Wars series. In the last few years, particuarly on the Internet but seeping into other forms of media, a real hatred of Star Wars has appeared and I'm not sure I understand it. And not just of the prequels, but of the original trilogy itself. The response to my earlier comparison struck me instantly as a way to forgive LotR for changing the movie we all fell in love with, but crucify (no pun intended) Star Wars for the same thing. But I'm pretty sure that isn't true in this case. And to be honest, were I only to buy one of the DVD sets I would wait for the EE. No big shock there. But I have the luxury of having the cash right now for Two Towers. And to be honest, between the trailers (love 'em, God help me) and the RotK preview (wow...) I feel like my $15 was well spent. I for one am looking forward to having all 21 discs (3 2-disc sets, 3 4-disc sets, 3 discs of extras from the collector's edition) of Lord of the Rings on DVD lined up on a shelf of my DVD collection. Oh... and your reason for keeping them at 3 hours os dead on. Theater owners would hate it because it cuts down on the number of showings per day.

As I understand it, it won't improve the video quality, particuarly if the video quality is degraded to start with. However, unlike a VHS tape, the quality will not degrade futher with additional viewings.

As I've said before, this rfeally isn;t a double-dip. First off, they told everyone about it far in advance. Add in the fact that the discs are meant to complement each other (different versions of the movie, different special featues) and I don't see a reason that there is all this hostility towards buying the first release. I find it especially ironic considering the amount of crap that we, as the DVd community, have given Lucasfilm for even thinking about releasing the original Star Wars trilogy as the special editions only. Everyone gripes and complains and gnashes their teeth and boycotts DVDs. But when the producers of LotR do it right by releasing both the theatrical and extended editions, everyone looks down on the theatrical version. I'm not sure I understand that logic.

Crap. I'll fix that as soon as I get home today and have the corrected version posted by 5:30 or 6.

Once again, the bracket is updated. I also corrected a misspelling and strainghtened things up a little.

I can't think of anyone to add... but I would like to point out that I beat Stubby. - GSMS

I have been trying to erase the memories of "Galactica 1980" from my memory for 20 years now. Thanks for bringing it up.

I'm getting them both. I got both the 2-disc and 4-disc Fellowship discs, and haven't regretted it for a second. I love trailers, and the 2-disc sets are the only ones that have them.

None of my local stores did a "Midnight premiere" thing, which ticked me off as a couple actually advertised it in the Sunday ad, then decided not to participate.

And the bracket is updated and all errors (but misspelling Taft's name, sorry) are fixed. If anyone sees anything else, please let me know. And in case anyone is interested (like the website people) the new official logo for Genesis IV is posted on my graphics page. Just follow the link!

the best I have seen for news is thedigitalbits.com. For reviews, it used to be dvd.ign.com, but I agree with the post above. Now, I like dvdfile.com.

My favorite of all time? Easy. Star Wars. No contest.

How about this for obscure... "It's Your Move" starring Jason Bateman. The best episode had him booking a band for a school dance or something, then having to fake it with recorded music, skeletons and heavy cloaks. They were "The Dregs of Society". They were a hit. About three episodes later, Jason's character was reading newspaper and on the front page was "Dregs of Society have Royal Performance!" he looks over th top of the paper at the camera and winks... one of the simplest and funniest things I saw up to that point.

SWF Smarkdown! August 25, 2003 LIVE from the SOLD-OUT Sioux Falls Arena in Sioux Falls, South Dakota!! All matches due by 9 PM Send all materials to: Suicide King All matches are regular singles, non-title matches, and all word limits are still 5000 words. Loser's Bracket Matches XCalibur v. Insane Luchador Send to chirs3 English Dragon v. Judge Mental Send to Edwin MacPhisto "The Sinner"John Duran v. Aecas Send to Suicide King "The Franchise" Mak Francis v. Dace Night Send to Grand Slam Viktor Tarankov v. Stryke Send to chirs3 Winner's Bracket Matches Annie Eclectic v. Micheal Craven Send to Grand Slam CIA v. Show Send to chirs3 Dante Crane v. Ejiro Fasaki Send to Edwin MacPhisto Quiz v. "Deathwish" Danny Williams Send to Suicide King Jay Dawg v. Apostle Send to Edwin MacPhisto Main Event "The Sacred One"Andrew Blackwell v. Nathaniel Kibagami Send to Suicide King