Open the Muggy Gate

Sandman dropkick! DRINK!

HEY!

Eh... it doesn't bother me like it would to other people. I know it's all great and shit, but I'm in no rush. Blowjobs are fine and dandy anyways... Micah was a hell of a lot worse.

My luck that I get the girls that don't want to put out until about 10 months into the relationship. Oh they'll do blowjobs all day long, but sex? Bah...

OPTIMUS PRIME HAS PROSTATE CANCER!

You know, there are times when I think it can't get any more ridiculous. And then WP launces one over the fence again.

DERRICK KING~! FUCK YES~!

I heard Keith Olbermann on the Dan Patrick show the other day trying to convince the world that David Ortiz is not an MVP just cause he's a DH and doesn't play the field. He also pointed at ONE play where David made an error and focused on that for a good while as evidence for his case. ONE ERROR! Now looking at my sig, I have a biased opinion, so I'm not gonna go on a crazy rant on why we should storm MSNBC and rip Keith's head off (he was wanting Derek Jeter as MVP. SHOCKING I KNOW!) So I'll ask ya'll a couple of questions. In your mind, does being a DH hurt David Ortiz's shot at being MVP? And if the Red Sox just barely miss winning the division, does David deserve to win the MVP? And if not, who?

I said it before and I'll say it again... SCHWING

OMG shes so kewt

SCHWING

ESPNNews just made that Andruw Jones announcement too. I really wonder who the hell can get him. Whoever it is, they are gonna be one fortunate team.

I've always liked that penguin gif that Rick James has in his avatar.

Made it to the final 2 against this one guy who had all sorts of good luck during this tournament. We played about 30 minutes heads-up, and we were at a fucking stalemate. I have pocket queens and raise him and he calls. Flop comes out 8, 6, 10. I bet 30,000 (out of about 160,000). He goes all in and I call immediately. He goes "FUCK" and throws down his 8,9. My queens hold up. I just hope he doesn't hit it. He can only get a 7, 8, or 9. Turn card is a 4. Good, good... river card. 7! He hit his straight on the fucking river for the win. That hurt... but he did buy me a beer to make up for the really bad beat I had. That's the furtherest I've ever gotten in that tournament, so it's all good.

And then next week Edge finds out that Lita gave him crabs, herpes, syphilis and some sex diseases that are unknown to man. So we'll just name them Bond's numbers 1 through 31.

I turned 21 yesterday in a bar playing in a 100 person Texas Hold Em' tournament in the middle of the final four. Rock on.

Well I'll be damned. 34 and counting.

http://www.gtaportable.com/ And there's our first information on Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories. Looks promising.

This is the calm before the storm. Sooner or later Dama will start going crazy posting about rooms spinning, a Texas conspiracy, Adrian Peterson mysteriously getting his leg broke falling down some stairs mid-season, and OU losing to everyone in the confernece... not necessarily in that order. And if you think OU is bad... Tennessee had a second player arrested this week! That's 4 this off-season now. We are the Bengals of college football!

I make random comments here and there and post pretty pictures of shit that sings. And I mark for Umaga, but who doesn't?

My Fucking God.... how can David Ortiz NOT win the MVP?

And here's our Spirit Squad quota for the night.

That was the greatest Flair Flop ever.

Did Candice just do a waistlock into a fireman's carry? DRINK!