Ace309

As Wildchild continues stretching in preparation for their match, he hears his partner’s voice from around the corner: “Nic? I’m going to check with Hardy about our interview… Will you be ready when I get back?” “Oui,” replies Wildchild. He finishes his calisthenics and heads over to the sink with his bag. As he begins to apply his facepaint, he suddenly sees an unwelcome image standing behind him in the mirror. The Bahama Bomber turns around to find himself face-to-face with one-half of the Tag Team Champions… Toxxic. “What are you doin’ here?” demands Wildchild. “I came here to give you and your partner one last chance to avoid humiliation and pain, and withdraw from this match,” Toxxic grins, flashing his trademark lopsided smile at the Caribbean Cruiser. “The fact is, nothing you can do will properly prepare you for us because you haven’t faced anything like us before. With Sean you’ve got the power, the sort of strength that can break little guys like you and me in half, and with me you’ve got… well, just ask Johnny about me,” the Straight-Edge Sensation laughs. “Trust me sunshine, this combination is going to walk all over you.” Wildchild rolls his eyes. “You finished?” he asks, but Toxxic ignores him. “Nice tattoos,” the Brit comments, peering first at the rope mark on Wildchild’s throat, then moving around his opponent for tonight to take a look at the ink on the Human Hurricane’s back, “…so when did you decide to become Michael Craven?” Wildchild grinds his teeth, his eyes narrowed in anger as Toxxic continues his makeshift inspection: “-And what does this say?” he asks, prodding at the French writing beside the outline of the scar from Wildchild’s reconstructive surgery. “I don’t speak French, you see.” “It says ‘Never Forget, Never Forgive’,” the Tropical Tumbler snaps, wheeling around to slap the Brit’s hand away. “And you better remember dat!” “Now, I wonder what it might be that you’re not forgetting or forgiving,” Toxxic muses to himself, smiling as he strokes his chin because of course, he knows very well. “Let me see… Mike Van Siclen, perhaps?” Wildchild’s eyes flash with rage at the mention of his hated rival and Toxxic, pleased with the result, continues. “Now tell me Dub-Cee - when exactly were you planning on getting your revenge on Mike?” The Straight-Edge Sensation grins as Wildchild’s purse together tightly and his eyes narrow further, almost into slits, but he still resists the urge to respond. Toxxic continues, clearly enjoying the game of seeing how far he can push his challenger: “I mean, honestly, Wildchild,” asks the Brit, “Mike Van Siclen tried to cripple you… and what did you do? Waited around, played silly little games, then watched me retire him before you even got near him. Just as well you did though,” Toxxic continues, reaching out a hand to pat Wildchild’s cheek patronizingly, “because otherwise Mike might have broken the other one…” *smack* Wildchild slaps Toxxic’s hand away before the straight-edger can make contact and steps up aggressively, but after a couple of intense seconds the Tag Champion merely grins and shoulders his title belt. “Nice talking to you, Dub-Cee,” Toxxic tells the Caribbean Cruiserweight as he turns and walks off, “try not to get lost; I haven’t made you tap out since Battleground, and I’m looking forward to it!” At this point, Wildchild has become a five foot-ten inch bottle of emotion. Tears of impotent frustration begin to trickle down his cheek and he is visibly shaking with rage as he watches Toxxic round the corner of the locker room. Toxxic smiles to himself as he enters into the corridor, muttering, “Let’s see how you prepare for that, sunshine!” As we: FADE OUT

We come back from the break, Maddix waiting with a big smile on his face, watching the entrance way as Funyon yells into the mic, “Ladies and Gentleman, the following match in the SEVEN MINUTE CHALLENGE!” The fans all cheer, Maddix chants already breaking out, but Funyon clears his throat and continues, “Introducing first, from Huron, South Dakota. He weighs in at two hundred and twenty pounds and is YOUR WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION… he is of Martial Law, he is…. LLLLAAAANNNNDDDDOOOONNNNNN MMMMAAAAADDDDDIIIXXXXXX!” … While the atmosphere in the arena is joyous, and Maddix laps it up for all it’s worth, behind the curtain, waiting to make his appearance is the Sacred One. He hears the jubilant roar of the crowd and lowers his head wistfully, just not feeling up to the task any more… Appearing from the shadows is the former World Heavyweight Champion, reaching out and putting a hand on Sacred’s shoulder. The Australian perks up and quickly spins around, seeing Toxxic, a rye smile on his face. “Still alert… still driven…Bollocks, I know you still want it!” the Rev0 leader coolly remarks, grasping both hands firmly on Sacred’s shoulders. The Straight-Edge Sensation, although nine years his allies junior, looks upon Sacred almost like father figure, anything to get his point across. … “Now where is this pathetic convict!” pipes Comet, shaking his fist with gusto. “These fair citizens and I want to see justice served and served right now!” “Simmer down, freak! All good things come to those who wait, or steal, as is the case with our World Champion.” … As the renegade commentators bicker much to Pete and King’s confusion, Toxxic continues, “That miserable wannabe, that absolute dreck nabbed my gold,” Toxxic has to stop, a bitter taste filling his mouth, “but we’ll have the last laugh when you wreck that bloody twunt and that troll with the wizard’s sleeve he’s got with him.” Sacred stares at his stable leader, his motivational speech somewhat lost in translation, but his eyes tell the story, and Sacred nods. “Seven minutes is all it takes. Now get.” … Back out in the arena the crowd wait on tenterhooks. Maddix continues to warm up as he jogs on the spot, but even the wait gets to him. The wait soon comes to an end as the television screen begins to flutter, and the picture begins to warp and distort. Then, through the PA, comes a familiar voice. “There is nothing wrong with your television set…” “He’s here!” comes Riley’s jubilant cry. “I knew he wouldn’t let me down, not for a second.” “Do not attempt to adjust the picture…” “It matters not my flamboyant friend, as the Australian has to face insurmountable odds in what will be another great victory for justice!” “We will control the horizontal…” “Who let these jokers back on the air? This ain’t good for bid’ness!” Pete yells. “We will control the vertical…” “…We will control transmission…” The picture is suddenly returned to normal, but now the lights fade, proceeding Andrew Blackwell’s entrance from behind the curtain as Lycia’s “Tainted” begins to play its haunting tune. The spirited boos from the capacity crowd are head quite loudly quiet and ambient music, but Sacred puts it out of his mind, his strength and resolve increasing as he approaches the ring. He climbs up the ring steps slowly as Funyon gets on the mic, announcing to the viewing audience… “And… his opponent! Hailing from Adelaide, Australia, he weighs in at two hundred and sixteen pounds. Please welcome a FORMER World Heavyweight Champion and member of Revolution Zero… He is, SACRED!” “That’s right; Sacred’s a former World Champ himself. He’s done it all before. He’ll have no trouble putting this punk kid in his place.” Comet is clearly outraged, “That punk kid as you call him was victorious in the Cold Front Classic, defeating Sacred in the final in glorious battle, and smited Toxxic to pry the title away from the soiled hands of evil!” “Steady on, there’s no need to overact! Which, incidentally, is why your acting career failed miserably,” Riley gleefully points out, before scuffling can be heard over the air and Comet and Riley start yelling “FREEDOM!” as they’re dragged away kicking and screaming. “Anyway…” King says, trying to get things back on track as the camera’s focus in on he and Longdogger, “As Riley was alluding to, I think people are simply deluded, blinded by the image of seeing their favored son on top. Yes, he may be the World Champion, but he went through absolute HELL to get there, and would have to be feeling the effects of that. His overconfidence in his own abilities, his denial of his injuries and underestimating of his opponent will be his undoing.” With both men ready, Landon paces back and forth, playing to the crowd, while Sacred simply stands still, preparing himself mentally for what is to come. Kivell steps forward and nods to both men before pointing to ringside to start this match. *DING! DING! DING!* 7:00 … 6:59 … 6:58 … 6:57 While the time clock begins to count down, Maddix wastes no time launching an attack, darting forward leaping forearm, but Sacred almost grunts in amusement as he ducks to the side and avoids one of his own moves. Maddix spins back around with the grace of a Matador, except he’s the one on the charge, connecting with a Spinning Sobat Kick that doubles over the Australian. Maddix slips behind his opponent and pulls him down with a School Boy attempt, but Sacred pushes out almost immediately! The two men whirl back to their feet to meet each other, Maddix only momentarily surprised by the Aussie’s swift counter before he fires off a forearm smash that clocks Sacred in the jaw. Two more stiff forearms stun the Sacred One allowing Maddix to yank him by the arm and whip him into the ropes as Landon heads behind his opponent on his return, stopping him dead in his tracks, hooking his hands across Sacred’s face. The So-Dak moment is countered as Sacred spins out and heads behind Maddix, locking his biceps in place and strangling the World Champion with a Sleeper hold! Maddix charges forward before the move can be locked in to its fullest effect, sprinting to the corner and hopping up onto the second, then third turnbuckles, pushing himself off and crash landing on top of Sacred! The Australian has the wind knocked out of him as Maddix thumps into his chest then rolls back to his feet. Sacred is too slow in getting to his feet and Maddix catches him with a Dropsault, planting his boots into Sacred’s chest and sending him hurtling across the ring! Landon somehow lands back on his feet, riding a wave of support from the crowd as he looks to end this one post haste, waiting for Sacred to bounce of the ropes and return against his will, clambering for oxygen. 6:30 … 6:29 … 6:28 The World Champion prepares to put this one beyond doubt and with a quick shuffle of the feet shoots off a Superkick! No! Sacred ducks underneath just in time! “The move that won Maddix the Coldfront Classic was well scouted! You can’t put one over on this Australian, no sir,” claims King with glee. Landon stumbles in double-take fashion, thinking he had it, but he’s soon brought back to reality as Sacred heads down low, taking Landon down with a reverse single leg takedown on Maddix’s right leg, quickly hopping on his back and sitting down, pulling back on Landon’s knee with a Single Leg Crab! “Ah, the Solution 9, Sacred hasn’t busted this out in quite some time,” notes the Longdogger, “but it’s a smart move as we begin to see both men’s game plans come into effect in the early stages.” “Predictable, though they may be,” King answers, “but of course, there can’t be anything fancy in their strategies with only seven minutes to work with. For Landon its hit and run, pin Sacred down for the three as quickly as possible by any means necessary, and for Sacred, its draw the time out, give himself the greatest chance to stand the test of time, as he’s done for so many years!” “Am I going to have to put up with blatant favoritism every week?” “You bet. Sacred rules! Maddix drools!” Sacred sits low, trying to apply as much pressure as possible and prevent Maddix from escaping, but Landon digs in and hurls himself forward, the ropes only a few feet away. With one big lunge he manages to grab the bottom rope and break the hold! “ONE!” 5:53 “TWO!” 5:52 “THREE!” 5:51 “FOUR!” 5:50 “Break the hold Sacred! I’ll stop this match so help me god!” Kivell’s amateur theatrics are hacky at best, but the message gets through and Sacred breaks the hold. “See that? That’s a real pro, eating up time and controlling the flow. That’s what a champion needs, none of this flippy floppy jazz.” “We’re just two old battle axes King,” Pete notes, “but even I can see that this is the future. Landon got where he is with his unique style, and he has no reason to change now. Just watch him go!” Indeed, Sacred’s stalling as he lifts Landon to his feet has given his opponent a tiny window of opportunity as shrugs Sacred off and… “WHOO!” … Chops Sacred across the chest with thunderous force! “WHOO!” Another leaves Sacred’s chest beet red! “WHOO!” The Australian is forced back into the corner, and Landon takes him by the hand and hurtles him into the opposite turnbuckles, following him in and crashing into him with a Stinger Splash! Sacred is dazed as he stumbles out in a stupor, giving Maddix the perfect chance to pin him down with an Oklahoma Roll! ONE! TWO! -but Sacred kicks out, and in the process, rolls out of the ring! “Landon again tries to end this quickly,” Pete points out, “but the wily Australian knows that the ball’s in Landon’s court; all he has to do is run the clock down and he’ll book himself a meeting with the Champ for the title.” “Exactly Dogger, he doesn’t have to do anything if he doesn’t want to,” King replies, “because he knows the real test is after these seven minutes are up. He could do laps around the ring if he wanted!” “Wouldn’t make for good television, though.” “They put you on play-by-play didn’t they?” 5:02 … 5:01 … 5:00 As five minutes ticks over, the fans at ringside are absolutely livid as Sacred takes a time out, completely ignoring Kivell’s orders to get back into the ring, while Cortez and Clark loom at either side of the challenger, but they know this is Landon’s fight. “ONE!” Kivell starts a count, but Sacred just strolls around the ring, the maniacal side of the Australian making a brief appearance as Landon clenches his fist, frustrated by the predicament, but knowing he has to play it cool. “TWO!” “THREE!” “Maddix is in a bind,” Longdogger observes, “either he lets Sacred wind the clock down, or take a risk and possibly shoot himself in the foot.” “And therein lies the answer,” King answers with a chuckle. “Maddix will take the risk. Maddix ALWAYS takes the risk. He’s the World Champion now; he can’t let himself be made a fool of. His pride, no, his giant bloated ego won’t let him!” “FOUR!” “FIVE!” The crowd starts to rise up, anger boiling over for the Australian who knows he’s in the driver’s seat. The fans start to chant: “MAD – DIX! MAD – DIX! MAD – DIX!” “SIX!” “SEVEN!” “MAD – DIX! MAD – DIX! MAD – DIX!” Sacred stops, looking around through the sea of fans all rally behind their champion. This is Landon’s perfect chance to strike and he seizes it, charging across to the ropes, vaulting onto the top and leaping off- CRASH! -but ends up crashing into the guard rail as Sacred dives clear! 4:45 … 4:44 ... 4:43 “The Spaceman Plancha! But nobody’s home!” Longdogger cries. “What did I tell you?” King smarmily boasts. “I bet everyone here expected non-stop action, but Sacred can see the bigger picture, and his experience will ultimately carry the day.” Maddix’s body is splattered against the padded concrete, even the fans have to cringe as Cortez and Clark steps forward to interject and Megan checks on Landon. Sacred, though, simply steps over his opponent and rolls back into the ring, climbing back to his feet and waiting patiently, looking at his invisible watch from time to time. Maddix pulls himself to his feet, shaken but not stirred, and he quickly tries to hop back up to the ring apron and catch Sacred unawares. Sacred meets him though, swinging with a forearm smash- WOOSH! -but Maddix ducks, heading between the second and third ropes, spearing the Australian in the gut! The cheers ring out as Sacred backs away in pain, but from his doubled over position he sprints forward, trying to knock Maddix clear into the third row, but the Champion steps aside and Sacred tangles himself in the ropes! Maddix would love to watch his opponent helplessly struggle to break free, but he has to be quick and takes a few back, charging across the ring apron and hitting a leg drop across Sacred’s head! 4:12 The roar of approval is deafening as Sacred is sent hurtling across the ring, propelled by the impact! Maddix has to stop and take a breather, his suicide dive taking the wind out of him, but looking up at the time clock he knows he has work to do. Sacred gingerly climbs back to his feet, seeing Landon enter the ring out of the corner of his eye. The Aussie spins around, a few forearm jabs stopping Maddix in his tracks, before snapping him over with an Ankle Scissors. Landon hits the mat and rolls back to his feet, but the move has him feeling dizzy, allowing Sacred to get inside and lift him up and over- BAM! -with a Northern Lights Suplex, keeping hold with a bridge! ONE! TWO! -but Maddix kicks out much to the fans delight. Sacred isn’t fussed, though, instantly twirling around and grabbing Maddix before he can escape and mount a come back, driving his knee into his spine and locking his arm and head firmly in place with a Chickenwing Facelock! “And the champion’s failed risk comes back to haunt him,” notes Longdogger, “as it gives Sacred enough time to execute a few quick moves in succession, finally bringing Maddix down to the mat where he’s at his best.” “That’s what Sacred has to do, keep Maddix anchored to the mat and slow him down, effectively taking out most moves in his arsenal, and before you know it, the time will run out!” Landon’s free arm flays WILDLY as Sacred pulls back on his head and twists his arm, while Kivell gets down on his knees and asks Maddix the question, but his muffled cries are enough to indicate he’s going to fight on. And he does! Try as he might, Sacred can’t stop Maddix from pushing himself forward, hurtling his whole body towards the ropes. 3:27 … 3:26 Landon’s desperation is fueled as he looks at the time ticking down, just a few inches from the ropes…. “MAD – DIX! MAD – DIX! MAD - DIX!” 3:18 He’s almost there… 3:17 “MAD – DIX! MAD – DIX! MAD - DIX!” … but Sacred suddenly and forcefully pulls back, dragging Maddix’s body back towards the centre of the ring, keeping the hold locked in for dear life! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” “Landon seems to have been totally thrown off his game,” Pete notes. “His victory at Slay Ride was amazing, his rise to the top an awesome feat, but now he’s been brought back down to earth, literally!” “Whoa, Pete, settle down that’s enough enthusiasm for you for one night,” answers King with a wicked smirk. “Of course Landon is off his game, Sacred has already lost to him once before, and after seeing Toxxic fall at Slay Ride, he’s obviously formulated a cunning plan.” But while King gushes, Landon has already set to work escaping the hold, his free hand reaching back and ripping and tearing at Sacred’s features! The fans delight in seeing Sacred’s face mauled and he has no choice but to let go! As soon as his grip is released even a little, Landon dives across the ring and whirls to his feet like a cat, while Sacred backs away like a scolded dog with a mangled face. Maddix builds up some speed and runs towards his opponent, but Sacred hits the mat and Landon hits the ropes, coming back on a return trip, only to be lifted into the air, spun around like a top! “Tilt-a-Whirl! NO!” Pete cries abruptly as Maddix slips away from the Australian’s grasp, landing on his feet without a scratch! Sacred growls, swiping at Landon’s head with a wild forearm blow, but Maddix expertly ducks, heads behind Sacred and takes him into position with an inverted Front Face Lock- 2:45 … 2:44 .... WHAM! “RRRRRRRAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!” -and spins around, driving his elbow into Sacred’s chest and dropping him to the mat! “Landon Eye!” blurts Pete suddenly. “This just may be it; a quick, hard-hitting move might just do the trick!” Maddix quickly hops over Sacred and hooks him by the leg as Kivell counts for- ONE! TWO! “NO!” Pete cries. “Sacred is still alive in this match, but Landon isn’t resting on his laurels.” Maddix lifts Sacred to his feet, glancing at the time clock from out the corner of his eye, finding Cortez and Clark on the outside, cheering him on, clapping their hands and getting the crowd involved. The Champion grins, knowing 2005 will be a calendar year, but first he has to do away with his first challenger as he lifts his Australian opponent to his feet. Landon pummels Sacred with stinging forearm blows, before doubling him over with a sharp kick to the gut, setting him into position as he runs into the ropes behind Sacred, returning, ready to take Sacred around the head and plant him face first. “Throwback!” both announcers cry, but with a graceful pivot of the feet, Sacred turns around and meets Landon with a knee to the ribcage! 2:13 … 2:12 Sacred tries to press the advantage, pulling Landon close and grabbing him by the tights, lifting him up into the air, completely vertical! The fans roar to life, calling to their champion to counter, and Landon responds, trying to free himself, kicking wildly! Sacred almost stumbles, unable to keep Landon steady, so he decides to just back clumsily towards the corner, dropping Maddix on the top rope! Cortez and Clark both exchange knowing glances, smiling profusely as Landon is in his element, on the top rope! Sacred, though, knows this all too well and simply grabs Maddix by the head, pulling him down and draping him across the turnbuckles! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” “Hah! Where’s Maddix going to go now he’s stuck in the proverbial tree of woe? Just as it seems Landon will turn the tide and put the result beyond doubt, Sacred reaches into his bag of tricks and pulls out another gem.” “This match is tailored almost perfectly for Sacred, but knowing Landon’s explosive offense, the Aussie’s tactics may work against him!” From his vantage point, dumped upside down in an impossible position, Landon can see Sacred lean against the opposite turnbuckles, taking his sweet time as the clock counts down- 0h:1 For those not upside down, like Sacred- 1:40 Inching ever closer to a World Title bout, Sacred waits patiently while Landon struggles to break free, waving away help from his allies and fighting on his own. 1:34 ... 1:33 … 1:32 The seconds continue to tick over, until the wait finally gets to the Australian, deciding its time to put the result beyond any doubt. With Landon still trying to shuffle himself off the turnbuckles, Sacred looks to the sky, then at Maddix, lowering his head and charging across the ring at his trapped foe… … but Maddix has a few tricks up his sleeve, and just as the Australian is about to break him in half with a Kamikaze spear, he picks his spot perfectly… … Pulling his upper body up and sitting on the top rope, just avoiding the impact! Sacred is not so lucky as- CLANG! -he crashes into the ring post shoulder first, and the fans go absolutely nuts! “HOW!?” is all King can utter. “Sacred had this match in the bag, he was about to obliterate Maddix, but the damn Spaniard escaped!” “Now look who’s right,” Pete boasts, nudging King in the side. “Sacred thought, as we all did, that Maddix couldn’t possibly survive, but using his superior agility he’s won himself this match!” 1:00 .. 0:59 … 0”58 Sacred groans as Clark checks to see if he’s all right, albeit with a huge, satisfied smile on his face. Maddix thanks his lucky stars as he somersaults off the turnbuckles, instantly pulling Sacred down with a School Boy, placing the point of pressure on Sacred’s now injured shoulder as he hops his feet up onto the second rope and the fans cheer, chanting along with Kivell’s count- “ONE!” “TWO!” “THREEEEEEEEEE…!!” … But Sacred rolls his good shoulder out to the side, breaking the count as we count down, now forty five seconds to go and Landon in the box seat. Sacred is stunned, stumbling around in a circle, but the Champion is there to confirm his worst fears, taking him in an inverted DDT position- CRUNCH! -and dropping Sacred across his back with a Diving Reverse Backbreaker! But Landon doesn’t go for the pin; instead he keeps hold of the Face Lock, pushing Sacred forward and grabbing his injured arm, sitting down across Sacred’s lower back as the entire arena explodes! “YYYYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!” “LAND OF NOD! LAND OF NOD!” Pete cries over and over, the atmosphere overcoming him. “Toxxic tapped to this move, and now it looks as though Landon Maddix will defeat another Champion with this move!” “Well, I guess the ICTV title isn’t *so* bad…” 0:20 … 0:19 … 0:18 The fans all look up at the time left, and then the situation in the ring. Maddix grits his teeth, unable to keep a smile from covering his face as Clark and Cortez cheer him on, along with the thousands on thousands of fans in the arena. 0:13 … 0:12 … 0:11 With the final ten seconds approaching, it looks as though not even the lord himself will deny Maddix… … But Sacred is a desperate and cornered Australian, and he still has a trick left, ready to spring at any moment. As Maddix’s mind returns to the scene of his epic victory, Sacred takes his free arm and reaches up… “FIVE!” “FOUR!” “THREE!” “TWO!” …suddenly pulling Landon’s arm free from around his head and hurls himself forward with a somersault, shrugging Maddix clear and out of the ring! ONE! … *DING! DING! DING!* The fans cannot believe it. Clark, Cortez. They can’t believe it. But Funyon’s booming voice confirms their worst fears- “Ladies and Gentleman, your winner, having lasted all seven minutes and now NUMBER ONE CONTENDER to the WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP… SSSSAAACCCRRRREEEEDDDD!” “He did it! He actually did it!” King shouts in amazement. “I, of course, didn’t doubt him for a second. Not a one!” “Just as Landon countered the Narcosynthesis to earn himself a shot at the World Title in the Coldfront Classic, Sacred somehow escapes the Land of Nod to earn a shot himself! Just when I thought 2005 would be different, just as we all would, the Revolution put another one over on Martial Law!” “Don’t despair, Petey,” King answers reassuringly, “This wasn’t even half the battle. The World Title match will be the real fight, but I’m confident that Sacred will again emerge the victor.” Lockdown goes to a commercial break, as Megan gives him the title and reassuring words, flanked by Cortez and Clark, all staring at Sacred, who simply stands in the centre of the ring. …A smile the kind we’ve not seen from him in a long time covers his face, his eyes set on the World Title as we… FADE OUT

The Smartmarks Wrestling Federation presents... SWF LOCKDOWN, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 5th, LIVE FROM THE VERIZON WIRELESS ARENA IN MANCHESTER, NEW HAMPSHIRE! (5:00pm PDT, 8:00pm EDT; check local listings) Send marked matches, promos, etc. to Ace309 Hey, guess who lives in New Hampshire! I do! After all the shit going down over Christmas break and at Slay Ride, FINALLY it gets back to where it really counts -- the squared circle. The Suicide King and Longdogger Pete will be presenting all the fallout from Slay Ride, including Landon Maddix's incredible title win and the flip-flopping of the HCG and USJL titles! What will Toxxic say? Opening Promo: Landon Maddix SWF WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS TAG TEAM MATCH Revolution Zero (Toxxic & Sean Davis, SWF Tag Team Champions) v. Wild and Dangerous (Wildchild and Johnny Dangerous) -> You know it, baby! Wildchild and Johnny Dangerous made their triumphant return towards the end of 2004, ending the year with a triumphant victory over Max King and Dominic Korgath to secure #1 contendership to the SWF World Tag Team Championships! People have said that it's inevitable, that it's destiny for Wild and Dangerous to come back and win the tag championships -- but if Sean Davis and Toxxic have their way, that destiny's going to have to be put on hold! Rules: Standard tag rules. Have fun with the tag ropes. Word Limit: 6500 Marker: Ace309 SINGLES MATCH Manson v. "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins -> How many times has this match happened? Yeah, that's what I thought. SWF, SJL, these two have brawled way too many times for me to discuss in depth here, so we'll say that whoever wins will get some sort of title shot in the next three shows and leave it at that. No, I'm not kidding. Rules: Standard singles rules. Word Limit: 4500 Marker: Chuck Woolery TAG MATCH Martial Law (Alan Clark and "Urban Legend" Todd Cortez) v. "The Icon" Max King and Dominic Korgath -> Let's get some order in the tag ranks, shall we? Weeks ago, Cortez and Clark aligned with the NEW SWF World Heavyweight Champion, Landon Maddix, to form Martial Law, a stable designed to swing the balance of power from Revolution Zero. Thus far they're on the right track, but in this match the newly formed team of King and Korgath look to derail them! (As a side note,KKK would be such an awesome name for you guys; King, Korgath and Kelly. Think about that one.) Anyway, this match should establish who's for real and who's for... fake in the tag division, so let's stop being polite and let's start getting real! Rules: Standard tag rules. Word Limit: 5000 Marker: Justice SEVEN MINUTE CHALLENGE MATCH WORLD TITLE NOT ON THE LINE Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix v. Sacred -> Yes, this is our opening match. Sacred, the perennial World title contender, lost to Landon in the finals of the Cold Front Classic tournament, and we all know what Maddix has done since then. Now, however, Sacred has a chance to make up for that. If he can go seven minutes with Landon Maddix without being pinned, he'll receive a World title shot on the 1/14 edition of Storm. If he somehow scores a victory over Landon in that seven minutes, he gets to name a stip, too. Whereas if Landon can win in seven minutes, he gets to take a breather until a Clusterfuck defence. Sounds like fun? You know it. Rules: DQs and countouts are in effect. There is a seven minute time limit on the match. Word Limit: 4000 Marker: chirs3 Plus: Everyone who's not booked better have a promo about how they intend to win Clusterfuck! Yeah, you heard me! Munich, Mak Francis, Carnage... all this and more... on LOCKDOWN.

THREE! TWO! ONE! *BOOOM!* FIRSTLOCKDOWNOFTHENEWYEARBITCHES~! Pyro greets us to the beginning of the SWF's 2005, live from the Verizon Wireless Arena in Manchester, New Hampshire, home of crazy screaming people! In the ring, Funyon is ready to go. And so are the new announce force... "Ladies and gentlemen...at this time, it is my great pleasure to introduce your new SWF announce team. Please welcome...LONGDOGGER PETE!" "YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" "And...THE SUICIIIIIDEEE KIIIIIING!" "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" The camera swoops down to the announce position and to Pete and King, both smiling away, King despite the customary boos being hurled his way. "Ha! They still love ya partner." Pete chuckles, shortening King's smile somewhat. "Welcome to Lockdown folks, with me, Longdogger Pete, sitting in the desk with The Suicide King. Brings back a few memories, eh King?" "Yes. Not particularly fond memories, but memories nonetheless. I just hope you're more tolerable than Axis and MacPhisto were." "Well, I'll try my best, but I ain't promising nothing." "It'd be hard to top MacPhisto, that's for sure. On with the show itself and we have four matches lined up for your here tonight, with the main event being a Tag Team Title defence by Revolution Zero. Toxxic and Sean Davis defend the titles against probably the longest serving tag team in the SWF today, Wild and Dangerous...who look to become the first team to hold the SWF Tag Team Titles for the third time." "Also tonight, we've got the long standing Cruiserweight Champion and Revolution Zero member Spike Jenkins...wait, Spike Jenkins?" "Yes." "He's still alive?" "Yes..." "...well I'll be jiggered. Spike Jenkins up against Manson here tonight, another veteran of the ring." "Plus we've got more tag team action. The possible successor to my throne, the NEW King, Max King is in action. He teams with Dominic Korgath to take on Todd Cortez and Bloodshed. Or...is that The Apostle?" "It's Alan Clark. And speaking of which, Alan's long time nemesis and current ally is in action to kick off the show. Yes folks, that's right...the NEW SWF World Heavyweight Champion and long-time ICTV Champion Landon Maddix will go one on one with Revolution Zero member Sacred in our opening bout. A Seven Minute Challenge, which we'll speak more of in a minute...after, our new champion graces us here in the ring." "Oh, joy. Just the way I wanted to start my first show back on color duty." "PREPARE...FOR...LANDON!" ...WAAAAAHHHHH... *DUM DUM* "YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" And right on cue, the music hits! The crowd in the Verizon Wireless Arena rise to their feet, cheering, applauding, screaming...whatever, they're happy to be here and they're even happier to see Landon Maddix emerging through the curtains! With a belt over each shoulder and a broad grin on his face, Maddix stops on the stage and soaks up the atmosphere, as behind him emerge his new found friends. Megan Skye, Todd Cortez...and Alan Clark, looking least happy of the four. "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the ring...MARTIAL LAW! MEGAN SKYE! ALAN CLARK! The NEW SWF Hardcore Gamers Champion, TODD CORTEZ! And...the reigning SWF Intercontinental Television Champion and NEEEWW S W F WOOORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! LANDON "LA CUCARACHA"... MAAAAADDIIIIXXX!!!" Raising both titles above his head, Maddix does his best not to look smug...and fails miserably. Meanwhile, Alan Clark is already leading the way down the aisle, Megan and Cortez following on and leaving the World Champion to bring up the rear. "To think, THIS kid is the World Heavyweight Champion." "Despite all your best efforts King." "It boggles the mind. To think that this runt will go down in the record books alongside great wrestlers such as myself, Tom Flesher, Danny Williams, Magnifico, Rane, Wilson, Strangler, Sacred..." "Mark Stevens." "Let's not go nuts here." One by one the Martial Law members enter the ring and congregate in the center, waiting Maddix milks the moment for all it's worth, doing a tour of ringside and tagging hands. Hands that include Longdogger's, but not King's as he gets nothing more than a cold glare. Maddix grabs a microphone once at the timekeeper's table and rolls his titles into the ring... "MAD - DIX! MAD - DIX! MAD - DIX!" ...as suddenly, a small group of fans positioned behind the announce desk start to chant the World Champion's name. Stopping to salute them, the champ then pulls himself up onto the apron before leaping over the top into the ring, Megan applauding her man for no particular reason. "See, when I was in control of this place, this kid would never have gotten mic time, let alone the World Heavyweight Championship." As the music cuts, Maddix scoops up his belts and places one over either of Megan's shoulder, weighing his valet down considerably under the goldage. Meanwhile, Maddix turns back around the checks his mic is on. "So, this is what it feels like to be World Champion huh?" "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" "You'll forgive me if I come off a little smug here, but let's face it, last time I was World Champion the company folded before I got a chance to do so much as boast about my win, let alone actually defend the title. This time, I'm gonna milk this for all it's worth." "Why doesn't that surprise me?" grumbles King. "It's taken me a year and a half to go from Junior League debutant to SWF World Champion. Not all that impressive after what Toxxic did in just a half a year I know, but I'd like to think that my rise to the top was something that people will remember. See, winning the World Championship is a great honour in itself. But just as much as winning the title means to me, keeping the title means just as much. Records, lengths and number of title reigns...that stuff may not mean all that much to other people, but I guess I'm a mark for myself when it comes to that sort of stuff. And you can bet I didn't win this title just to have some short, forgettable title reign. I'm determined that Landon Maddix will be remembered as a World Heavyweight Champion, some way, somehow." Motioning Megan over, Maddix lets her place the belts over his shoulders now, whilst Clark and Cortez mutter amongst themselves. "Boasting over, Toxxic...you put up one hell of a fight my Limey friend. Just ask the doctor who had to stitch me back up after the show. But I came through far too much over this past year and a half to let it slip away on the night I finally got my big chance. Ninety three days is some record and you gave this belt one hell of a lot of prestige in the past few months, but the time of change is upon us. See in those past few months that you brought prestige to the World Title, you and your cronies were setting about turning the SWF into Revolution Zero territory. You had the power. You were in control. But suddenly...you boys are in OUR world!" "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" "I have the World Heavyweight Championship, the biggest symbol of power there is in the company. Not to mention the ICTV Championship, the second biggest. And just for the record, for as long as I can go defending both these belts, I will do so. I'm not going to disrespect this belt the way Janus did. The gold and the power is with me. Your biggest asset, gone, to me. The second biggest asset, still with me. And now, you don't have quite the numbers advantage you had before. Four on one, I may have been intimidating into not taking you on. But you made the mistake of creating more enemies than you could keep track of. Todd Cortez was ready to fight you. He just needed to even the sides a little. Alan Clark was ready to fight you. He just needed to even the sides a little. And that's what we have done." Turning around, Maddix points towards Alan Clark as he continues on. "I have been at odds with this man for the better part of a year Toxxic. We have brawled and battled through the SJL, to the SWF. Two Out Of Three Falls Matches. Ironman Matches. Empty Arena Matches. We've been through those as enemies and quite frankly, the history that's gone down between us will never be forgotten. But somehow, someway...you have prompted us to not only put aside our many differences, but to vow...to unite together, not for the good of ourselves, but for the good of the whole! A Revolution Zero run SWF was a dystopia we could not allow to develop! The warning signs were there and it was just a matter of time before the Revolution had all the titles, all the power. There was no-one to govern you. No-one higher up to stop you, after the issues between King and Stevens had blown a hole in the SWF's hierachy." "And before I blew a hole through Stevens' head..." King recollects. "So we have come together and declared Martial Law here in the SWF! Todd Cortez. Alan Clark. Landon Maddix. We are officially leading the fight against the Revolution. Us three men. Are we the most intimidating force to ever come about in the SWF? Far from it. But if you think we're going down without a fight Toxxic, then you're very much mistaken. And remember, we're only the beginning. Think of all the enemies you have made over the past year. The enemies Sean Davis has made in the past half year. The enemies Spike Jenkins has made in...well, god knows how long he he's been here, but it's a long time. And think of all the enemies...Sacred has made over the years. We're just the start Toxxic. We're the vocal minority. But believe me, there are more men and women who have issues to settle with you too..." In the background Cortez and Clark both nod, almost too knowingly, as Maddix takes a moment to adjust the belts over his shoulders. "Like Dace Night!" "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" "Like Andrea Montgomery and Annie Eclectic." "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" "Like...JANUS!" "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" "...like Wild and Dangerous." "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" "Johnny Dangerous...and Wildchild. We don't like them. They don't like us. But the one thing we share..is that we're all determined to see this 'Revolution' crumble around you Toxxic!" Some of the fans applaude, some cheering Maddix's words, as most sit intently listening. As Megan, Clark and Cortez clap away, Maddix wipes a smirk off of his face. "And so, the battle continues tonight. Martial Law got the better of you at Slay Ride, Revolution. Todd Cortez got the last laugh over Sean Davis, one way or the other. Alan Clark stepped it up and defeated your wildcard, in Sacred. And obviously, I beat you Toxxic. Tonight it continues with Sacred versus Maddix, one more time...only tonight, it's with a seven minute time limit. Sacred, I know that you're itching to get a shot at me one more time and even more, to get a shot at the World Heavyweight Title. Especially after the Cold Front tournament. I know, I was in your position...one match away from the title shot. And I know it must be eating you up inside not to have gotten that shot. But Sacred...you're Revolution Zero. Any thoughts I may have had about simply forgoing tonight and givining you the title shot haven't entered my head, because you're a Revolution member. So tonight, rest assured, I will have no second thoughts, no attacks of conscience. Tonight, it doesn't matter to me if it's seven minutes, seventeen minutes or seventy minutes. It only takes a matter of seconds for me to hit the Crash Landon and it'll only take a matter of seconds to send you to the Land Of Nod." Pausing for a moment, Maddix carefully removes the ICTV Championship belt from over his shoulder and lays the gold on the mat in front of him. "And if I do manage to beat you tonight, then don't say I'm not a fighting champion. Because Sacred, if you don't win the World Title shot...then, if you want it, I'll give you a shot at this. January 14th, Landon Maddix versus Sacred, one on one. If you win or we go to the limit tonight, then it'll be for the World Heavyweight Championship. If I win tonight, then I'm offering you a shot at the Intercontinental Television Championship instead. It's win-win Sacred. Win-win. The offer's on the table. All you have to do now is get out here, get into this ring...and Prepare..For..LANDON!" "YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Throwing down the microphone, Maddix places his World Title with the ICTV on the mat and high-fives Cortez and Clark. They then begin to leave the ring as Maddix removes his "Cheat 2 Win" t-shirt and throws it into the crowd. "Well, strong words from the World Champ." muses Pete. "And, he's put up a pretty gutsy offer. Even if Sacred doesn't get the World Title shot, Maddix is offering a shot at the ICTV Title. Which ain't a bad consolation prize." "No, but it IS a consolation prize." King replies. "Not that it'll matter. The advantage is still Sacred's, when we come back for the opening match of 2005."

No, but you and Spike are both welcome to send me a haiku or something.

This is delayed until tomorrow morning or early afternoon owing to the lack of two of my matches. I'm going to need Landon and Sacred to PM their matches to me so I can mark them.

Right, I was wondering about a breakdown in scoring.

Anyone have a breakdown of the scoring in the amateur match? I'm a nerd, and I'm curious how closely if at all they tried to emulate the actual rules (considering there hasn't been a single 5-minute period or periods that added to 5 in years). I know, I'm a nerd.

Edit in Jerry Orbach or I'll keel you.

That's because it's a shoddy use of the term "evolution" to describe, inter alia, geological concepts that fall with evolution proper into an overarching theory of the origin of the Earth. (EDIT: Or, rather, a theory that describes why the earth is in the state we find it today. The original phrasing is inaccurate.) Evolution proper has nothing to say about the Big Bang, for example, or how the earth got to be here. It deals only with change among living things.

Yes it does, it means there is at least 1 white hat and 1 black hat, the other is either black or white, if they knew it would be too easy. Remember this is a brain teaser so it's not meant to be too easy. Remember what I said in another thread about how you're trying desperately to use ideas you don't understand?

They're fairly well-known, but the fancam iron man matches with Bret/Flair and Bret/Owen are very nice. I'm not sure on dates.

If anyone's truly feeling conflicted on the evolution-creation question, may I suggest a visit to Talk.Origins? The site has a certain degree of preaching to the choir, if you'll pardon the phrasing, but it attempts to deal with arguments on both sides of the discussion. For an alternative view (which is dealt with heavily on T.O, among other places), Kent Hovind's website is a hardline young-earth creationist website that attempts to deal scientifically with creation. For a synopsis of the hardline view in handy-dandy oversimplified comic book form, go to Jack Chick's site and look at the Big Daddy tract. Warning: Fundamentalism. There's a ton of material on the web if you want to explore the various arguments and urban legends surrounding each of the views. It's a bit of a hobby of mine to keep up with the literalist viewpoints - I just find it interesting.

Looney's post raises a question. Aren't all PWI votes wasted? I was under the impression that the awards were worked.

Because he has been, sporadically?

XF9 was a goofy stable comprising, if not entirely then mainly, Ash Ketchum and LDP. LDP wasn't exactly a dominant personality, so Ash's goofiness really shined through. Then Tod deKindes showed up as an angsty German face, and hilarity ensued. The biggest thing that came of TdK's XF9 membership was that, following Yet Another Match With Ash at (I believe) Apocalypse 02, he ran in and attacked Flesher to avenge his stablemate's loss. This led to Flesher dumping the US Title to deKindes in a run of three straight free-TV matches. The high point of the angle was Ash no-selling XF9's existence by asking the Midnight Carnival to protect his pregnant girlfriend Misty.

I don't have the book handy, but one of the articles in William Irwin, ed.,'s book The Matrix and Philosophy (or is is Philosophy and the Matrix? I can never remember) deals briefly in Hitler's scat fetish. It's a surreal read to begin with, so pick it up, but don't pay full price for it. Actually, just steal it.

This reminds me of Tod deKindes joining X-Force 9, in reverse. Anyone? Anyone?

Thanks for that. Anyone can major in anything without even a vague understanding of it, especially when he's 19 and probably a freshman or sophomore. Your arguments are shoddy at best. I'm trying to point you toward someone who started from the same place you're starting but was actually able to make a coherent statement instead of just rambling in a self-contradicting manner. And there's your problem. You totally misunderstood what I was saying. Of course literature can be understood differently by different people. That's completely irrelevant. What IS relevant is that literature has no existential import of its own and no probative value whatsoever. It reflects the author's views, and to some extent the views of the readers and commentators. It does not reflect reality. It can't 'prove' anything. Otherwise, James Morrow's Jonathan Sarkos character from the Towing Jehovah trilogy would be the death knell for your argument, because he is pure evil. But, of course, it isn't, because literature has no probative value.

Well, there are always outliers. Ahhh, moral relativist tripe. The problem with using literature to "prove" something is that literature is at the whim of the writer. Literature aims to illustrate, but it does not on its own say anything about the world. MacBeth could have just as easily been written to "prove" that pure evil exists. It's just that that wouldn't have been dramatically interesting. If you're really interested in using Abraham and Isaac as an argument about ethics, I'd advise reading Kierkegaard's Fear and Trembling before you try to go any further. You're swinging ineptly at the same sort of ideas that he writes about and tries to illustrate. I think it would also help you get your head around something you're clearly having a lot of trouble understanding.

I'd assume about 16, which is when my history teacher pulled out the old "Hitler is only a bad man because we won" chestnut.

Is it wrong for me to picture Davis and Francis as a Nation of Islam/Domination-style tag team with Marcus Washington as their Farrakhan analog, and Spike just getting more and more confused as it gets more and more intense?

And it's good that you did. The problem is that for a variety of reasons, many of them good, a lot of people aren't as reliable as you are. The appeal to show isn't for people who are reliable, or for people who no-show once every month or two, or even for the people who no-show constantly [as they're mostly beyond help]. It's for the people who are on the fence. We need to encourage the people who aren't showing but could really shoot up the card to start showing, both for the good of competition and for the sake of having a solid card. I mean, I'm reluctant to put Sean Davis and Manson in a singles match, despite the fact that they're both very good writers and of roughly equal ability, because there's a good chance neither of them will show. That affects the way I can book the wrestlers and the way writers develop.

I'm probably Mak's biggest fan. Color me happy. Toxxic and Maddix may feel free to colour me happy.

Can we try not to turn this thread into a pissing contest, please? Under which I include responding to this post if you think you've been wronged by being accused of partaking in a pissing contest. If you think it applies to you, then there's no use arguing about it. If you don't think it applies to you, then it probably wasn't intended for you.