The one and Only Smackdown Spoilers...

[{''({o..o})''} 0]

Its amazing. I think Eddy might be over enough that any stupid shit(no pun intended) gives him more heat, rather than taking it away.

[Tawren 0]

(5) Orlando Jordan beat Big Show by Countout. A quick match in which Show was dominating until, Get This, he started to have diarrhea problems from the taco incident earlier in the show. God I hope I heard Keith wrong on that one, but you know I didn’t. So Big Show gets Counted Out because he has to go to the little boys room. I know there’s a “drizzling shits” joke here somewhere but I’m not gonna go there tonight. Can you imagine what goes through Ultimo Dragon’s mind watching stuff like this?

Oh. My. God. Words cannot describe how I feel about this.

[Bored 0]

Please please please please have Gowen beat Cole with his fake leg next week.

[Guest Fook]

As great as that would be, we don't need any more angles with announcers.

 

There are plenty of other ways to turn Gowan heel (I assume that's where they're going with this).

[Bored 0]

As great as that would be, we don't need any more angles with announcers.

 

There are plenty of other ways to turn Gowan heel (I assume that's where they're going with this).

Yes but then you could have Droz run in...um welll um you know what I mean...for the save.

[Guest Nanks]

Well......we're always bitching them out for not doing anything original. This isn't an angle I've ever seen anywhere else!!

[Guest Fook]

Neither was corpse fucking...

[Guest Boo_Bradley]

This is the 3rd time we've been treated to the Big Show in the Bathroom

 

Once with Venis, Once with Regal...

[Guest JMA]

This remind anyone else of Taker in EWR? Him always trying to get his heat back, that is. Of course, it probably means Taker is jobbing to Brock at No Mercy so that Taker can move on to Vince. Ugh...

[Guest wrestlingbs]

This is the 3rd time we've been treated to the Big Show in the Bathroom

 

Once with Venis, Once with Regal...

Ah, the things we've learned with Big Show in the bathroon...

 

Val Venis has a small dick.

 

Regal has green pee.

 

Eddie has a very stereotypical cousin named Jose.

[AndrewTS 0]

Actually, we learned Show has a small dick.

 

Venis: Heh-heh--they call you the Big Show?

[ISportsFan 0]

Big Show in the bathroom = ratings, obviously.

 

Jason

[USC Wuz Robbed! 0]

No... Val exposed Show's little weewee. Remember? "Oh I guess I see you're not the big show down there" or something along those lines. In which Show assaulted Venis for.

[2GOLD 0]

Think next week Zach becomes a MFer?

[Guest Nanks]

Can you imagine being Orlando Jordan in that booking meeting?

 

Steph: Alright Orlando, this week you're going to be winning a match against Big Show.....

 

Orlando: Oh my God, that's fantastic, thanks so much

 

Steph: .....because he is so desperate to shit that halfway through the match he has to leave the ring

 

Orlando: ..............I see.....................great..............

[Cuban Linx 0]

Well at least Steph doesn't appear to be involved in the main event or final segment this week.

[Spaceman Spiff 0]

OH DEAR GOD! We’re in the bathroom now and we see Big Show’s feet underneath the stall. Eddie is outside taunting Show saying that the burrito scam was a setup between him and his cousin “Jose” all along. Eddie was holding three rolls of toilet paper during this so that you know Big Show had none in his stall.

"I'm sorry, esse, I don't have a square to spare. I can't spare a square, homes."

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

DETAILED SMACKDOWN SPOILERS

 

by Keith Brisotti Updated: 10/1/2003 8:43:27 AM

 

 

 

Here’s what will happen on Velocity & Smackdown! this week. I will try to be as detailed as possible but I am sure I missed a few things.

 

First off let me tell you about the crowd. The bottom level looked sold out, as there were only a few scattered empty seats. About ¾ of the top level was tarped off and the seats that were available were about ¼ taken. Quite a change from selling out the Bradley Center in less then an hour a few years ago!

 

The night started with a WM XX video. The crowd popped for Hogan and at the end of the video.

 

Some guy from a local radio station (was his name Fish??) tried to get the crowd pumped up but was not very successful.

 

The in ring action started with 2 pretty entertaining dark matches. The first match was Kanyon & Chad something vs. 1 guy with a big tattoo on his back and another guy that kind of looked like HHH. There names may have been Kevin & Ted. 5 minute match that ended with Kanyon hitting his finisher on one of the guys. Kanyon did a good job in getting the crowd into the match.

 

The second dark match was Spanky & Paul London vs. what sounded like Jeremy York and ken Anderson. One guy looked like a smaller Hardcore Holly and the other guy kind of looked like bigger Scotty 2 Hotty. Anyway, Spanky played our face in peril as the finish had London hitting the Scotty 2 Hotty guy with his finisher. Crowd was pretty into Spanky.

 

Tony Chimel then was hocking some Undertaker t-shirts and the guy with the t-shirt gun got a nice “You Suck” chant from members of the crowd that did not get a chance at a shirt (man…. tough crowd!)

 

Then Josh Matthews & Tazz were introduced as our Velocity announce team. Tazz got a really nice pop.

 

The first velocity match pitted Jamie Noble w/ Nidia vs. Shannon Moore w/nobody. Noble won with some type of submission hold that I was not familiar with. Real nice, competitive 7 minute match. The one high spot was Shannon Moore hitting a corkscrew moonsault on Noble that only resulted in a 2 count (lots of “2” calls through out the night by the way!)

 

Some jobber (Chad Krugger maybe) vs. Sean O’Haire was next. Squash for O’Haire in about 2 minutes.

 

Rhyno vs. Funaki was next. Another competitive 5 minute match saw Rhyno go over with the Gore…..Gore….Gore. Mild ECW chant and nice face pop for the gore.

 

Main event for Velocity had Rey Misterio vs. Nunzio. Rey had the biggest pop yet & Nunzio was very much over as a heel. Nunzio focused on Rey’s left shoulder the entire match and Rey did a great job of selling it (right up until he walked up the runway after the match). Excellent 8-minute match saw Rey win with his combination 619 – springboard leg drop.

 

As they changed the ring apron over for Smackdown! They showed a trailer for The Rundown. Of course the crowed popped big time for The Rock.

 

Michael Cole came out to no reaction what so ever. After the Smackdown! Intro they show us that our main event will be Undertaker/Kurt Angle vs. John Cena/Brock Lesner.

 

“We lie. We cheat. We steal” hits and Eddie accompanied by Chavo come out in a beautiful black convertible. Eddie will be defending hid US Title against Matt Hardy who is accompanied by Shannon Moore. The finish was classic Los Guerreros antics. While Matt Hardy was distracting the ref, Shannon tried to take Eddie out with the US belt. Eddie ducked it and drop kicked the belt into Shannon’s face. When Shannon dropped the belt, Eddie grabbed it and through it to Matt Hardy. Eddie then cowered from Matt, which of course the ref caught. After the ref took the belt from Matt Hardy and while he was turned away getting rid of it, Chavo snuck in and laid out Matt Hardy with his Tag Team belt. 1 Frog Splash later and Eddie is still our US Champion.

 

Next, Josh Matthews caught up to John Cena as Cena arrived to the building, After insulting Josh, Cena said that he was going to start doing things the American way….for himself. He also said that Kurt Angle would be living in his shadow after tonight.

 

They then showed Eddie and Chavo walking backstage when they ran into Big Show. Show was saying something in Spanish & then told Eddie that he didn’t like him. Show then shoves both Chavo & Eddie. Eddie vowed to get even with Big Show later that night.

 

APA vs. The Bashams was next. After as ref bump and some interference from Shaniqua, one of the Bashams pinned Faarooq. After the match Bradshaw just about beheaded Shaniqua with a clothesline from hell.

 

A-Train then comes out to be the special guest commentator for our next match which is Chris Benoit vs. Charlie Haas. Match went about 9 minutes and saw a lot of mat wrestling early on, several German Suplexes and attempted Haas of Pain (too close to the ropes), a Sharpshooter from Benoit. Also what looked like a semi-blown German release by Haas. The ending came when Benoit locked in the crossface and A-Train broke it up. A DQ win for Benoit and a crossface of his own by A-train will set up what I am sure will be a match between these 2 at No Mercy. Benoit got nice pop as he left the ring.

 

They moved a monitor into the ring next which can only mean 1 thing…..Promo Time!!!! And what do you know, Vince’s music hits and he makes his way out accompanied by Sable. Biggest heel heat by far for Vince and Sable. Vince says that he gave Stephanie 1 week to reconsider her decisions from last week and he demands that she comes out and cancels the Undertaker vs. Brock match at No Mercy and that she quits as GM of Smackdown!. This brings Steph down to the ring and she proceeds to say no to both demands. All this leads to a very intense Vince screaming at his daughter to do what he says. When that doesn’t work Sable tries. After a few insults between Steph & sable a cat fight breaks out in which Vince breaks it up & scoop slams Stephanie. Undertaker comes out to make the save but before he can chokeslam Vince Brock comes racing out (man is he fast!!!). A boot to Brock’s face takes care of him and this segment.

 

Big Show is shown in the locker room when a Burrito delivery comes for Eddie Guerrero. Big Show intercepts it and starts to eat them. All except 1 which he proceeds to add his own “special sauce” to for delivery to Eddie. Can you tell where this one is going yet???

 

Next is Tajiri vs. Billy Kidman for the Cruiserweight championship. Match was about 6 minutes and saw Tajiri win with the kick to the head. Tajiri was over pretty well as a heel after he yelled at us a few times that, now that he was champion we should all follow the Japanese custom of bowing to him.

 

Next was Big Show vs. Orlando Jordan. Show came out clutching his stomach. About 2 minutes into the match Big Show had to excuse himself and leave the ring in obvious discomfort. Winner as a result of a count out was Orlando Jordan. Show left to make a run for the little boy’s room. Someone check me but is this the first time someone has lost a match because a case of the runs? The saving grace of this spot had to be Show’s facial expressions.

 

Zach Gowen interview was next. Bottom line is that he will be back next week and he doesn’t want anyone to feel sorry for him.

 

We now go live to the men’s room where a very large pair of boots are seen in stall number 1. Eddie comes in to fess up to Big Show that Eddie doctored those Burritos. He also took all the toilet paper and only gave Show 1 square. He then kicked the stall door in on Show. Very funny segment.

 

Main event time. Cena/Lesnar vs. UT/Angle. John Cena came out first in a # 32 Bill Walton Portland Trailblazer’s jersey. A great rap followed about how he was going to bust out tonight and that Smackdown! was now his show. Real good stuff.

 

Very good 15 minute main event. Strong “You Tapped Out” and “Angle” chants throughout the match. Angle took a nasty bump over the top rope onto the floor. Not to be out done, Brock took a nasty bump as well over the top rope. It looked like he did a handstand on the outside apron for a second or 2 and then came down on his head. Both guys appeared to be fine. Cena hit Angle with the Masterlock punch to get the pin for his team. The production team screwed up though because after Cena got the pin they played Undertaker’s music!! Our night was not finished though. Brock went over and cleared off the announce table, grabbed Undertaker and set him up for an F5 through the table. Taker wiggled out of it and the chokeslammed Brock trough the table. Then they played Taker’s music again. This is probably where the show will end.

 

Just some posing by Undertaker afterwards and then another lap around the ring on his bike. Lesnar then got up and left hugging his title belt.

 

This was a very strong show that should come off well on television. The only real questionable match was the APA vs. Basham’s and even that wasn’t all that bad. The Eddie/Big Show stuff was really funny and the crowd loved it.

 

Biggest Pops

 

1. Undertaker

2. Kurt Angle

3. Eddie Guerrero

4. Stephanie McMahon

5. Rey Mysterio

 

 

Biggest Heel Heat

 

1. Vince McMahon (by far)

2. Matt Hardy

3. A-Train

4. Nunzio

[Spaceman Spiff 0]

So, they've build up Show as a ME monster, and Eddie's one of the hottest faces in the company right now, and they build a feud off bad Mexican food and a case of the runs?

 

I bow to the brilliance of the writing team.

[Guest nikowwf]

Eddy needs to go over Big Show in a match where the offense is like 50/50 and the ending is built off his offense. (Not Big Show hits his head, and then Eddy hits his finisher.) If they do this, then all the crap (pun intended) is fine cause it will ultimately help Eddy.

 

My problem is with Benoit/A-Train. Benoit beat him already. Several times. Are we supposed to push that out of our minds, and look forward to the heel getting yet another chance to win?

 

niko

[Guest Mulatto Heat]

So, they've build up Show as a ME monster, and Eddie's one of the hottest faces in the company right now, and they build a feud off bad Mexican food and a case of the runs?

 

I bow to the brilliance of the writing team.

Agreed.

 

And before the "It's ENTERTAINING!" police show up, just remember that this is the kind of crap that Show was doing during his long 'misused' period.

 

My problem is with Benoit/A-Train. Benoit beat him already. Several times. Are we supposed to push that out of our minds, and look forward to the heel getting yet another chance to win?

 

Umm.... Albert isn't horrible?

[Damaramu 0]

No see Albert's beating the shit out of Benoit leading up to the PPV. So everyone thinks he has Benoit's number. Then Benoit just beats his ass again and everyone says "I knew that was coming..."

[RavishingRickRudo 0]

Albert is the underdog... yet he keeps getting the advantage... we need to find a new word to describe the writing and booking team, because "DUMB" doesn't do it justice.

[Spaceman Spiff 0]

"Fumb". Fucking + dumb = "fumb".

 

Y'know, like "fugly".

 

...OK, that's pretty lame.

[Guest Choken One]

Sounds like a mixture of Fun mindless entertainment and solid wrestling...

[Crippler Crossface 0]

(1) Jamie Noble (w/Nidia) beat Shannon AllThatAnd Moore. Finally, the long dormant feud of the Jung Dragons versus 3Count shows it’s face in the WWE! Noble came to the ring in a goofy orange hat that he seemed very protective of. Very competitive with a lot of near falls. Noble finished off Moore with a submission move that was a guillotine choke with Moore’s legs wrapped around him.

...Cool. Sounds like I'm watching Velocity and Heat this week.

[Open the Muggy Gate 0]

Big Show and Eddie feuding... that might be good if they book it right... but it's the WWE so they are screwed...

[OldSchoolWrestling 0]

Will Chavo be turning on Eddie soon?

Will Zach be joing Mattitude down the line?

[Guest wildpegasus]

(1) Jamie Noble (w/Nidia) beat Shannon AllThatAnd Moore. Finally, the long dormant feud of the Jung Dragons versus 3Count shows it’s face in the WWE! Noble came to the ring in a goofy orange hat that he seemed very protective of. Very competitive with a lot of near falls. Noble finished off Moore with a submission move that was a guillotine choke with Moore’s legs wrapped around him.

...Cool. Sounds like I'm watching Velocity and Heat this week.

I've seen Noble preform this manuever. I believe it's a front facelock with Noble's legs wrapped around Shannon Moore to prevent him from getting out of it. Looks awesome. I think it'll be a good move to incorporate into a match.

[Crippler Crossface 0]

(1) Jamie Noble (w/Nidia) beat Shannon AllThatAnd Moore. Finally, the long dormant feud of the Jung Dragons versus 3Count shows it’s face in the WWE! Noble came to the ring in a goofy orange hat that he seemed very protective of. Very competitive with a lot of near falls. Noble finished off Moore with a submission move that was a guillotine choke with Moore’s legs wrapped around him.

...Cool. Sounds like I'm watching Velocity and Heat this week.

I've seen Noble preform this manuever. I believe it's a front facelock with Noble's legs wrapped around Shannon Moore to prevent him from getting out of it. Looks awesome. I think it'll be a good move to incorporate into a match.

I'm familiar with that one, but from the sound of it, this sounds different from the normal guillotine choke, which is a move my wrestler uses in the SWF and I believe the one you described.

 

The normal one is where they lock the opponent in a front facelock the body scissor him with their legs as they fall back, choking them out.