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the.weej

SWF From the FIYAH!

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The Smart Marks Wrestling Federation Presents...

A PAY-PER-VIEW EXTRAVAGANZA!

SWF FROM THE FIRE, LIVE, SUNDAY MARCH 7th, FROM THE SOLD OUT STAPLES CENTER IN LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA!

(7pm PST, 10pm EST; Featuring Icehouse's "Touch the Fire"... which I've never actually heard, but it's got a cool name and the only other song I could think of was "Firewoman.")

 

PPV time rolls around once more for the SWF! At the last FTF, the greatest tag team in SWF history was born, and despite being Clusterfuck winner, the considered underdog came in and usurped the longest reigning SWF world champion from his throne. There are many similarities between this years From the Fire and 2003's... but no doubt Va'aiga, for one, is hoping that history does not repeat itself! But never the less, legends will be made and new heroes forged... as they step... FROM THE FIRE!

 

MAIN EVENT

TWO STRAIGHT FALLS MATCH, WORLD TITLE

Charlie "Grappler" Matthews vs Va'aiga

So it all comes down... to this. So it all comes down... to the fact I couldn't think of a better line. Ahem. For the last six weeks, Charlie Matthews and Va'aiga have been trading barbs, beatdowns, and dramatic, steely staredowns. It all comes to a head at From the Fire, as the 2004 SWF Clusterfuck winner faces off agains the world champion, and man who EJECTED him from his stable upon his victory. The stage is set. But just like so many times in the past, Va'aiga has one decided advantage... he's not wrestling in the opening match of the PPV as well.

Rules: The first man to score two consecuitive falls over his opponent is declared the winner and SWF World Champion. Regular DQ, countout, pinfall and submission rules apply. (If I've stuffed any of this, please correct)

Send To: realitycheck

 

Dace Night vs ???

And as is a pre-requisite for all PPVs, the ???-man makes his contractually obligated appearance. Dace is a bit confused about this one... he knew he wasn't sure what he'd be doing for From the Fire, but he didn't think it'd be a mystery match.

Rules: Standard singles match.

Send To: Grand Slam

 

_-_WARNING_-_

 

It's a selection of hardcore brutality so serious, it needs its own section cordoned off on the card! Mothers, put the kids to bed and have Katie bar the door, because good god there is more barbed wire in this part of the PPV than between the Manginot and Siegfreid lines.

 

GRUDGE MATCH

STREET FIGHT

HVille Thugg vs Alan Clark

For three weeks, Alan Clark has been running his mouth, and when taking a pause, letting a sledgehammer do the talking for him. He's aggrivated the HVille Thugg, instiaged a match, and now faces high odds of getting discombobulated by the former, two-time SWF world champion. But it's not just any match: It's a street fight, where no rules apply... and there's nothing to stop Thugg from ripping Alan's head off and parading it up and down the streets of Los Angeles. It's entierly possible that he's being underestimated, after dethroning the incomprable Wildchild for the crusierweight title last show... but can Clark's ass still cash the cheques he's been writing with his mouth? Or is this tender going to bounce higher than his head off the pavement?

Rules: There aren't any.

Send To: realitycheck

 

HARDCORE TITLE

200 LIGHT TUBES MATCH

Aecas vs Toxxic

Though Toxxic is an impressive rookie who's scored a few unlikely victories in his short tenure with the SWF, Aecas is a tenacious, frightening competitor, who just happens to be the hardcore champion, and is definitely his biggest challange yet. At From the Fire, they throw down in... in... well, shit, do I really need to describe this? The real question being posed here is "Will you respect me in the morning?" And the answer: Aye, lad... after I've picked up my limbs, anyway.

Rules: There are 200 light tubes stacked outside the ring, and threaded through the ring ropes... which also happen to be wound around with barbed wire. Lovely. Two limb and/or major internal organ loss limit, please, and if there's a Va'aiga/Dace-esque swerve, the potential violence in this match will know no wrath like the death I will rain from the heavens.

Send To: Thoth

 

CAGE MATCH

John Duran vs Janus

Janus and Duran haven't exactly seen eye to eye... well... ever. 'Cept when Janus gives into his alternate personality, but that doesn't count. Either way, they've been notedly upset with each other since, after much hype and hoopla, Duran dethroned Janus as HGC champion. Tonight, retribution could well be at hand.

Rules: Pinfall-only cage match rules. There will be weapons of Janus and Duran's choice inside the cage. Once both men are inside the cage, the door will be locked and there can be no escape.

Send To: Suicide King

 

STAIRWAY TO HELL MATCH

Ann "Ichiban" Onita vs Jamie "Jay Dawg" Drazon

Some things just don't need long descriptions. This classic matchup, which is probably number IX in the series, has been one that's had no shortage of blood, kendo sticks and steel chairs. JD and Annie have fought for hardcore supremacy many times, and this time ain't no different, as they set the standard for the youngins' who follow. And what can I say? They're a cute couple!

Rules: There is a roll of barbed wire hanging above the ring, in a kerosine soaked rag. There is a ladder at the entranceway, which can be used to retrieve the barbed wire. Using weapons besides the wire, the rag or the ladder is frowned upon, but is anyone REALLY going to enforce anything in a match like this?

Send To: realitycheck

 

_-_WARNING_-_

 

USJL TITLE MATCH

Sacred vs "Coyote" Coy West

Coy, Blackwell, roud deux! I think. Either way, Sacred defends his USJL title for about the third time (Happy now?) against the Coyote, whose clubberin' ways have earned him a spot in the hearts of SWF fans the world over. And more than a few notches in the win column. A victory here for either man may indicate to things far beyond USJL gold...

Rules: Standard singles match.

Send To: chirs3

 

TAG TEAM TITLES

Wild and Dangerous vs The House of Todd

Todd Royal and Landon Maddix have shown... shall we say... less than 'godliness' since their promotion to the SWF proper. Unless, of course, they've teamed up with each other. They get a chance to cash in on their shot at the tag titles, earned a few weeks ago, as they face off against defending champions Wildchild and Johnny Dangerous. This is the first time in a little while the champions have tagged up, so the match may be slightly in the House of Todd's favour...

Rules: Standard tag match.

Send To: Grand Slam

 

ICTV TITLE MATCH

Charlie "Grappler" Matthews vs Insane Luchador

Charlie kicks off the PPV... in the opening match? Well, he needs all the time he can get to re-prepare himself for the main event. And the fact he's going to have to do double-duty is probably going to cloud his mindset, as well as the fact he faces off against the most unexpected challanger possible. The Insane Luchador Andrew Rickmen gets his BIG SWF break, shooting for the ICTV title on PPV. Whoda thunkit?

Rules: Standard singles match.

Send To: Suicide King

 

(All stuffs go to moi, obviously)

Edited by realitycheck

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Here are the "Touch The Fire" lyrics: (for reading and knowing pleasure)

 

she moves like a mystic

like a priestess tall and pale

she lays down the mystery

all her secrets are unveiled

 

wherever I look I see her there

wherever I go you know she's there

 

and she takes posession she has control

next to you I can touch the fire

and when the fever takes a hold

next to you I can touch the fire

 

her words fall in echos

ringing bells like gypsy rhymes

she has the power

no believer can explain

 

wherever I look I see her there

wherever I go you know she's there

 

and she takes posession she has control

next to you I can touch the fire

and when the fever takes a hold

next to you I can touch the fire

I feel the heat pumping in my veins

next to you I can touch the fire

I see myself going up in flames

next to you I can touch the fire

 

wherever I look I see her there

wherever I go you know she's there

 

she takes posession

she has control

next to you I can touch the fire

and when the fever takes a hold

next to you I can touch the fire

I feel the heat pumping in my veins

next to you I can touch the fire

I see myself going up in flames

next to you I can touch the fire

 

she takes posession

touch the fire

touch the fire

 

I feel the heat pumping in my veins

next to you I can touch the fire

I see myself going up in flames

next to you I can touch the fire

 

(Note: I've never heard it either)

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Guest Goodear

Bazillionth? We've faced once in a two falls triple threat match with Janus and split the falls so I could get the ICTV shot at GRAP-LAR.

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Can she do it?

 

Can she finally beat Drazon?

 

 

...

 

 

I dunno, but I bet we could promo and work something off this. JD, hit me with a PM if you come up with something fun I should know about :)

 

-Annie

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I love my description.

 

This should be an awesome PPV...I can't wait to read it. I am proud to go out this final time with an awesome angle with Clark and on an awesome PPV card.

 

Now...to spend the next 6 days writing my 13,000 word masterpiece where I take Z's advice and rip Alan's head off.

 

Da "good luck everyone" H

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I think my head would weigh in under the limit.

I'll take that bet.

 

;)

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You should have used "High Voltage".

 

"Fire in the disco...fire in the Taco Bell..."

 

That would have been gold!

 

 

Anyway...I have a bone to pick. 'Shown less than godliness'!?! Granted, Todd may not be brilliant, but I've more than carried his dead-weight for the past month.

 

:P

 

Nah, just kiddin' Todd. If you're reading, you should have a PM by the time you read this.

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Guest Evolution

As far as I know, the rules for the cage match are as follows:

 

1) Weapons will be provided for both Duran and Janus at the beginning of the match (that means the weapons will be IN THE CAGE).

 

2) Once the bell rings, there is NO ESCAPE from the cage. The door will be locked by an official and will be unlocked only after a pinfall has been scored.

 

3) Duran and Janus will be able to bring whatever toys they want. I'll be writing a promo for that later.

 

If I forgot anything or if Janus disagrees, we can work it out, but that's how I envisioned the match. Giving Duran a chance to leave the cage will leave the casual fan wondering "Why doesn't he just run away and get the fuck out of the arena if he's so scared of Janus?"

 

Don't feel bad for fudging it up, Z, I wasn't very clear with you about the rules. You got most of it right, to your credit.

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If I forgot anything or if Janus disagrees, we can work it out, but that's how I envisioned the match.  Giving Duran a chance to leave the cage will leave the casual fan wondering "Why doesn't he just run away and get the fuck out of the arena if he's so scared of Janus?"

 

Well, the only way out is to climb the cage, and I'm sure Duran will be trying it a few times. ;)

 

Featuring Icehouse's "Touch the Fire"... which I've never actually heard

 

You got that from Crow. He's the only other guy in the chat who has the song, and you make me very happy by choosing it. It's an Australian song. Buahahaha.

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Yeah, I knew that much. Look, sue me, I don't have all my MP3's and couldn't find a better fire themed song. And any of the other suggestions on this thread suck. So bite me.

 

Also bite me for any stuffed up descriptions/rules, which I'll edit now. Blah.

 

-Z

Edited by realitycheck

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Fuck it, I'm gonna have to no-show. Todd's gone AWOL, and I'm not going to be able to finish a tag match on my own to any sort of Tag Title standard.

 

If any of the CC knows anything about Todd's whereabouts...well, firstly why didn't you tell me...but, if you do, then fine. If not, just lettin' you know I haven't seen him around for the past couple of weeks, and he hasn't PMed me yet...so, yeah.

 

Sorry to W&D I guess. I'll get a promo done to make up for this.

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