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Breakfast from Hell


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Guest croweater
Posted

I don't know.

It looks like it'd be one hell of a hangover feast.

Guest Agent of Oblivion
Posted

Man, that thing'll kill ya..

Guest FrigidSoul
Posted

I'd like to see a state change their form of Capitol Punishment to fit this. Rather than lethal injection you make people eat this meal for breakfast every day for 2 weeks and then place them in a small holding cell. I imagine most people would die of cardiac arrest on day 9, but there are the heavier folks that can take the 14 days of it.

 

To appease the people against Capitol Punishment you could also make a rule stating that if they survive the above then they can have their sentence reduced to life in gen-pop.

Posted

It's a heart attack in a box!

 

What's really disgusting is that there must be a market for it or they would have never made it.

Posted

I would eat everything but the Eggs. Every frozen breakfast I've ever had has always had the same crappy scrambled eggs. Ditching the eggs probably makes the meal at least a bit less hazardous to your health.

 

And, I used to read XE all the time, when the hell did they sell out so much?

Posted

Buncha cowards.

 

Eat the meal, do your damn exercising and quit this "it'll kill you" since that meal is nothing compared to some of the breakfasts I was cooked as a kid.

 

Try eating four pieces of bacon, two pieces of scrapple, three sausages, three pancakes, and a hash brown and then you can complain about this pee-wee of a meal.

 

This isn't anything, thing wouldn't even qualify as a snack to old school farmer families.

Guest Agent of Oblivion
Posted
This isn't anything, thing wouldn't even qualify as a snack to old school farmer families.

 

How many people exert the energy of a farmer or coal miner these days? Also, those big ass breakfasts (which I know quite well) are made from things like fresh eggs laid fifty feet from the kitchen, no preservative-laden salt licks like this freezerburned atrocity.

Posted
What's scrapple?

 

You don't want to know.

If you know, you'll never touch the stuff.

 

I know, but I already loved the taste so I don't care if it was made from human.

Guest Agent of Oblivion
Posted

Scrapple's fucking delicious. Cornmeal mush flavored with pig. Mmmmmm MMMMMM.

Guest subliminal_animal
Posted

This "The Czech" idiot stole that from my funny shirt I got that has the Snapple logo, only it's not, since it's the "Crapple" logo. He stole it from there.

Posted
That doesn't look any bigger than any of the meals you can get at Cracker Barrel.

At least at the CB you would get grits too, which I like as long as they have cheese and bacon in them.

 

And I like scrapple sandwiches. Everything but the tail and the snout of the pig, oink oink.

Posted

I don't buy the back label. Unless their marketers are idiots they should put they serving size as one-half the box. Having a Sat Fat over 100% of daily intake is dumb.

Posted
I don't buy the back label. Unless their marketers are idiots they should put they serving size as one-half the box. Having a Sat Fat over 100% of daily intake is dumb.

The marketers realize that people who buy these don't read the nutrition label on the back of the box and probably dont care if theres over 100% saturated fat. And if the serving size was 1/2 box, it wouldn't matter because people would still eat the whole thing and thus still get all of the saturated fat. Its kinda like the snack food companies that make their servings 1 cookie. Who the hell eats 1 cookie?

 

Off topic on the saturated fat content, I just ate a Hagen Dazs ice cream bar with a 64% daily value of saturated fat...it was good too!

Posted
That doesn't look any bigger than any of the meals you can get at Cracker Barrel.

At least at the CB you would get grits too, which I like as long as they have cheese and bacon in them.

 

And I like scrapple sandwiches. Everything but the tail and the snout of the pig, oink oink.

Eh. All the grits I've ever gotten at CB are watery as fuck.

Posted

As a hearty Midwesterner, I enjoy a hearty Sunday breakfast. However, we've been putting in new flooring downstairs, so the kitchen has been out of order and worst of all, unstocked. Thus, I've made do with what I can find: scrambled eggs with salsa and cheese, a slice of watermelon, three strips of bacon (crispy, the best way) and a glass of milk.

 

What are you having for breakfast today?

Guest subliminal_animal
Posted

Hey next poster maybe you ought to rethink that Birds in the Hotel joke you were gonna make.

Guest Agent of Oblivion
Posted

Peanut butter toast, cranberry juice, cigarettes.

 

I don't know how people can wake up and eat a gigantic meal, anyway. I'm eating now because I've been up all night, naturally, but when I first get up, I can't even be bothered with food for at least a couple hours.

Posted

231% cholesterol?

 

Nevermind that you get 2/3rds of your daily calories from it, or the fact that it contains all the fat you'll need for the day, nor all that salt.

 

That cholesterol level is terrifying.

 

Hungry Man should change their slogan to, "Fuck you, I'm fat, leave me alone."

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