I Got Arrested Last Night

[Guest Quik]

Really? Me too.

[Guest Vitamin X]

Fuck it's difficult for me to type drunk, though I know some people who are the complete opposite of me and can drive well when drunk but terrible when stoned. I don't necessarily condone either, however.

 

Driving while twacked out is interesting, though. It gave me for some reason (while I was on my last cross country trip), an incredible amount of patience to just sit there and stare, and increased my alertness to my surroundings. Though of course, it's probably all just a PERCEPTION that I was driving better instead of what the reality was. In either case, I still made it without causing any problems except for when I came down and started getting antsy.

[Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye 0]

You people actually realize that shit like the above story isn't actually any kind of success, it's just cosmic luck stacking up against you just a little bit more.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

You people actually realize that shit like the above story isn't actually any kind of success, it's just cosmic luck stacking up against you just a little bit more.

for years and years and years?

[PLAGIARISM! 0]

I've never been behind the wheel in my life due to being drunk all the time. Everybody wins!

This is just...unfathomable to me. You're in your twenties and have never driven an automobile? You're about as bad as Dames.

My country is the length and breadth of a brisk walk, it's not been a problem yet.

[Guest Nanks]

Are you The Pope or do you live on the Channel Islands???

[PLAGIARISM! 0]

Yes, I have someone drive me around in a plexiglass box, so I can enjoy a glass of red whilst commuting.

[1234-5678 0]

Now, if I would have let my friend drive home, she'd be fucking dead right now, no doubt about it.

So instead, if you had crashed, both of you could have been killed...

 

Great plan!

He didn't crash and neither did I. When did I start dealing with a bunch of fucking nuns around here?

You are one of the saddest individuals I've ever encountered. I pity you.

Did you break into my therapist's office again?

[Giuseppe Zangara 0]

Next time I leave a bar, I hope one of you guys are there to take the keys from me.

[Angle-plex 0]

The way I see it, anyone who drives drunk is an asshole simply because they could have crashed, which means that they disregard the safety of others because it would inconvenience them to get a cab.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

Next time I leave a bar, I hope one of you guys are there to take the keys from me.

We will be there in the form of self-restraint

[Kinetic 0]

In retrospect, I feel like I was sort of tempting fate by making all sorts of drunk driving jokes and occasionally driving when I was totally smashed and couldn't even remember the drive home the next morning in the months leading up to my arrest. But I know for a fact that all of this heavy-handed "you could have hurt someone" bullshit wouldn't have phased me, because I really was a remarkably alert drunk driver. Had I been visited by the Ghost of Walking Future and had the opportunity to see how incredibly inconvenient every aspect of my life would become after losing my license, I might have thought twice about it.

[MrRant 0]

What does Metal Ed think of the situation?

[Metal Ed 0]

I'm glad you asked cuz I got some real strong opinions on this pressin topic. I ain't never been the type to hold back when it comes to booze. Hell, I been arrested a few times and I ain't shy to talk about it. Fucked up thing is, here in Wisconsin they take your shoelaces before they throw you in the drunk tank. I ain't never been able to figger this one out, on account of most of the drunks I've seen in there just fall asleep after a bit. Best I can figger, they don't want you dippin your shoelaces in the commode and snappin some old drunk with it. That'll leave a welt. Anyway, I can't condone drunk driving on account of that one girl on that web site done got linked here looking like the invisible man or some shit. Metal Ed don't want that on his conshunse and neither should none of y'all.

 

Smokers are jokers.

 

Stay in school.

[Guest Nanks]

Do you have an alter-ego gimmick account??

 

That's fairly lame.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

I'm glad you asked cuz I got some real strong opinions on this pressin topic. I ain't never been the type to hold back when it comes to booze. Hell, I been arrested a few times and I ain't shy to talk about it. Fucked up thing is, here in Wisconsin they take your shoelaces before they throw you in the drunk tank. I ain't never been able to figger this one out, on account of most of the drunks I've seen in there just fall asleep after a bit. Best I can figger, they don't want you dippin your shoelaces in the commode and snappin some old drunk with it. That'll leave a welt. Anyway, I can't condone drunk driving on account of that one girl on that web site done got linked here looking like the invisible man or some shit. Metal Ed don't want that on his conshunse and neither should none of y'all.

 

Smokers are jokers.

 

Stay in school.

Hey Ed, ever seen FUBAR? I think your brother is in it.

[Dr. Tom 0]

::marks for Metal Ed::

 

Oh, and drunk drivers should be shot.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

Do you work for the house of Saud?

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

They need to focus more on getting people who drive while talking on their cell phones.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

They need to focus more on getting people who drive while talking on their cell phones.

Or women drivers

 

haha

 

.......

 

.......

 

I take it back

[justsoyouknow 0]

I found the solution to driving drunk was just to move into the place where I drink at.

 

You guys can visit me at JJ's Cantina whenever you please.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

I found the solution to driving drunk was just to move into the place where I drink at.

 

You guys can visit me at JJ's Cantina whenever you please.

What about when you wanna go dance and pick up some bitches...

[justsoyouknow 0]

My niggas don't dance, we just pull up our pants and do the rock away.

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

My niggas don't dance, we just pull up our pants and do the rock away.

You've never wanted to listen to Off the Wall and fucking groove? I can't dance, but that shit makes my insides rattle in excitement.

[justsoyouknow 0]

I don't really dance, I just get trashed and sing along.

 

Yeah, I'm one of those drunks.

[EdwardKnoxII 0]

Just a word of advice for you if you do lose your license for a few months. First, whatever friends you have that have a car become the their very best friend because you're going to need them. Give them gas money, buy them drinks, whatever so they'll help you get places. But, try not to bug them for rides to much cause it's going to piss them off always being asked for rides.

 

Learn when the bus runs so you won't always have to bug your friends for rides.

 

I know all the stuff first hand. Not because I've lost my license but, because somehow the the span of a few months I've, more or less, became the only person in my group of friends that hasn't lost his license or car or BOTH for a being such a huge dumbass.