Street Racers

[Ced 0]

I don't know what compels people to do it, but I'm getting fucking sick of it. Practically every weekend for the past few weeks, I've had the pleasure of having to hear somebody about town in their fucking souped-up/riced-up car speed about town. I probably wouldn't bitch about it as much if it weren't for the fact that you know they're driving about thanks to their loud as fuck exhaust tips. And if that weren't bad enough, some of the bastards are doing fucking high-speed drift turns in the wee hours of the night, which is about as pleasant as nails against a chalkboard.

 

And to top it all off, one of the bastards nearly t-boned my ass racing one of his fellow bastards through a red light just about an hour or two ago. I see a green light so I start driving forward like normal, to my right I see two cars coming up to the light. I don't think anything out of the ordinary...until they both hit the gas.

 

Suddenly, it's damn apparent they're not stopping, so I slam on the brakes and stop in the intersection as they blow the red light. I'm sitting in the empty intersection, simply dumbfounded at what the hell just happened a few feet in front of me. A piece of me wanted to chase them down and cause some property damage, but no way I'm catching up to them in a car with a four-cylinder engine with a driver who suddenly developed a leadfoot on the brake.

 

After a few seconds, I finally regain enough sense to get out of the intersection and park on the side of the road to let it all sink in. All the while I can hear the same two guys rev their engines then turn with a loud screech of their tires. I let out the words "Fucking Assholes" under my breath and proceed to drive home. Those twenty minutes are the slowest I've ever driven on a city road.

 

Honestly, what the fuck is wrong with these people that use city streets as their personal racetrack? If you want to go race, race on an actual fucking racetrack or take up racing as a profession or hobby or whatever the fuck you want. Just stay the fuck away from me and the rest of the population that doesn't give a fuck about the fact that you can wake up half the neighborhood while going 70 MPH in a 40 MPH zone. Fuck your blatant disregard of traffic laws, fuck your loud as fuck engine, and go fucking find a nice lightpost to slam your car into. At least it isn't me you're hitting.

 

This has been an angry rant.

[Krankor 0]

We've got plenty of tools like that around here.

 

I think the solution to the problem might be to just hunt their asses down. Find out where they live, when they are asleep just drive by and lay on the horn until you see lights come on in the house. Also you could just inflict some sort of property damage on their "sick ride".

 

You always can go the route of following them as fast as you can and see where they stop and call the police. I'm sure they have something that is illegally modified on their precious rice burners.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

70 in a 40 isn't that bad. It's the urban setting that makes it dangerous. I consistently do 90 on country roads, which have a speed limit of 50, technically.

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

And of course when one of these people crash and die, you'll hear his family and friends go "OH WHY DID HE LEAVE US SO SOON?! HE WAS SUCH A GOOD BOY..."

[DerangedHermit 0]

And of course when one of these people crash and die, you'll hear his family and friends go "OH WHY DID HE LEAVE US SO SOON?! HE WAS SUCH A GOOD BOY..."

Yeah really, you never hear people say "He was a fucking dumbass. Now you see why he's dead?"

[Ced 0]

Yeah really, you never hear people say "He was a fucking dumbass. Now you see why he's dead?"

Replaced "dead" with "slightly injured and without a car" in that statement and you have my sentiments about one of my friends who decided to try to drift his Eclipse through a right turn, grossly overshot it and slammed into the concrete center divide. Damaged almost the right side of his car and came away with some nasty cuts . With my incident in the very same night, there was lots of sarcastic clapping to show my love for my friend, the dumbass.

 

Which brings up the question why the fuck would you let a 19-year-old drive a Mitsubishi Eclipse?

[Art Sandusky 0]

The people who I know either take it to the local 1/8th mile track or out on highways around here where doing anything below 75 has your doors being blown off by soccer moms in minivans.

 

Fortunately, my new car isn't nearly as racey as the GT was, so I'll never be tempted to push it. I'll just sit back and enjoy the ride as the children in the minivan ask their mother why light is bending around their car.

[Mole 0]

The loud bikes makes up for their small dicks.

[Art Sandusky 0]

I don't want a nice car to make up for a small penis.

 

I want a nice car to make up for a lack of confidence and to have an instant "in."

[MrRant 0]

I will never understand why people want their ricers to sound like giant vibrator rolling down the street.

 

God its irritating.

[Art Sandusky 0]

Put a couple'a fart cans on the Supra.

[Guest Nanks]

I'll just sit back and enjoy the ride as the children in the minivan ask their mother why light is bending around their car.

I read that about 5 minutes ago and I'm still laughing. I enjoyed that immensely.

[Art Sandusky 0]

Yeah, good ol' Physics 130 is helping me move my humor in a more cerebral direction.

[Guest Nanks]

Almost a day later and I'm still chuckling when I think about that one. I think your joke broke my brain.

[Slayer 0]

I don't want a nice car to make up for a small penis.

 

I want a nice car to make up for a lack of confidence and to have an instant "in."

But it's not about the small penis...

[Red Baron 0]

This is why I drive an 84 Priseanne, and if I hit a post, I can reverse and still able to drive away

[Guest Shoes Head]

Maddox wrote a nice piece on the car club assholes here.

 

You Drive a Honda Civic

Not a Race Car

 

 

Why are people so obsessed with making their cars look like they're faster than they really are? It's not just Civic owners, it's people with Neons and Hyundais too. They go all out and buy new rims, tint their windows, add fins, paint stripes on their car... why? It's old. You drive a shitty car, deal with it. Mitsubishi Eclipse owners are some of the worst offenders. What's the point of dumping all this cash into modifications when it won't significantly change the performance of your vehicle?

 

It's ironic that with all the money that these morons dump into modification, they could have saved up and bought a real sports car in a couple of years instead of pretending like they drive one now. It doesn't matter how big your fins are, it doesn't matter how cool your rims look, it doesn't matter how much noise your muffler makes. You still drive a shitty car. Period. End of story.

 

The other day I pulled up next to some jackass in an intersection. He started to rev up his engine and roll back and forth. I turned my head towards him, glanced at his car, glanced at him, rolled my eyes and turned back to the road. This pissed off the driver and as soon as the light turned green, he went peeling off. Way to go jackass. Now what did he prove? A) That his car is so fast and powerful, that he can even beat people who aren't racing him. B) That he's a wise investor for buying those rims, because the ones he had just weren't cutting it. C) Those stripes on his car look sharp and hide the fact that it's still just a Civic or D) That he's a dipshit.

 

Why didn't I race him? Because I don't drive a sports car and I know it. I could pretend I drive a sports car, just like anyone else. I could put giant fins on my car and pretend it's a jet or whatever the hell they think putting huge fins on a car accomplishes. Or I could quit pretending and just drive my damn car to work and school. Watching people race in Civics is like watching people race in minivans. I suppose the competition is there, but it's anti-climactic, like watching two geriatrics playing golf. It's a race where even if you win, you lose.

 

What's the point of having a fast car anyway? Is there some legal speed that they're trying to reach that they can't seem to do with normal cars? Even if your car can go more than 200 mph, you have to break the law (more often than not) to do so. Way to go dipshit, you spent your life savings on something you can't use. Worthless.

[Guest Nanks]

Amusing and true. Very good.

[Art Sandusky 0]

I don't want a nice car to make up for a small penis.

 

I want a nice car to make up for a lack of confidence and to have an instant "in."

But it's not about the small penis...

It isn't. Having an in is completely different. I mean, the converse of what you're saying (the in is because I have a small penis) is that people walk around picking up girls by introducing themselves and relaying the size of their dong immediately.

 

And only I do that. Back off my game.

[Ced 0]

Hey now...Civics aren't shitty cars. They get 25-30 miles to the gallon, dammit.

 

 

Power to the economy class vehicle!

 

But I do have to confess my sins and say that my Civic has 16" rims. But the tires don't wear down as badly as my stock tires did, so I feel mildly justified in that investment.

[MrRant 0]

I will tell you one thing... it is a bitch to find tires for my Supra. I had to get two and had to call at least ten places to find something that you fit 225/60/14. Pain in the ass.

[Guest 5.0Fanatic]

I've never been ofifically street racing, infact I would be disowned from my family if I did street race. My mom had a hard enough time letting me drive, let alone me buy and drive my mustang. Yeah its not the fastest, but it gets going pretty good. I've never street raced for money or anything, but if I pull up to a light, and some dumbass in a stock civic with exhaust and rims pulls up to me, I will show him what true V8 power is. No real rhyme or reason to this story, other than I will run my car sometimes, but only on non busy streets, never through red lights, and never 25 over the speed limit.

[Nighthawk 0]

The other day I raced a guy in a rusty VW Bug with my Camry with the dented in trunk and Bush/Cheney bumpersticker. I can't remember who won.

[AboveAverage484 0]

It's always satisfying to see a bad ass Mustang or Camaro enter the strip and see all the ricers immediately stop racing and trying to act bad ass.

[A Happy Medium 0]

Street Racers piss me off...it's funny when you see them rice-out a fucking four cylinder accors and act like it's something to fear. I drive a Z28, and well...you can fear it without putting underglows or spinners on it. It's about what's inside.