Comments which don't warrant a thread.

[The Niggardly King]

who's the nigger now FB... who's the nigger now?

[Nighthawk]

There was a guy staring at my cock at a urinal, so I told him to gtfo. (He was a nerdy Asian, so I wasn't interested in him staring at my cock). I saw him later on. The guy apparently just stayed in the bathroom all day looking at dicks.

 

He spotted me, so I was going to threaten him with the throat slitting gesture, but on a whim I went for the "Fork in the throat. You" move that Viggo Mortensen did in Eastern Promises.

 

 

It's actually way better. That's my new default threatening gesture.

[Buggerhen]

man, if anyone looked at *my* member, i'd smack him up for sure.

 

 

god damn queers

[Bruiser Chong]

I can't find my phone and have concluded that it's either in my car or gone. I was going to check the car a few minutes ago, but turned right back around when I saw that my neighbor is currently sitting on the porch reading. Normally, this wouldn't be an issue, except:

 

A) He's a bit slow

B) He'll talk your ear off despite being one of the most uninteresting people I've ever met

C) I don't want to hear about how many pages his book is. Again.

 

The best part is that the front of my building doesn't make for comfortable lounging/loitering. The porch is accordingly small and not at all designed with the intentions of allowing someone to sit out there at MIDNIGHT reading "There's a Monster at the End of the This Book."

[Spaceman Spiff]

The monster is Grover

[Ketamine Disaster]

I nearly drove two hours to see an art exhibit with a girl who I told I never wanted to speak to again, merely because she offered to spend the night.

 

Curse this penis.

[Nighthawk]

I was in jail for four days. (Same old DUI charge, but the specifics are boring).

 

First time I've been in for real jail, not holding cells or drunk tanks, as an adult. Surprisingly tolerable. I slept 15 hours a day and read a novel a day (two John Grishams, and a Michael Crichton. One day was devoted to court and booking out).

Booking out was the most god awful experience. They had us locked in this hot sweaty room for 11/12 hours, packed like slaves. Tempers flared, people yelling at each other, people pissing in the corner cause there were no toilets. That experience alone is enough to make me never, ever go to jail again.

 

I actually got hours and hours worth of stories from my four days in jail. Fascinating culture.

[FroGG_NeaL]

Let me tell you somethin' about drinking and driving...

 

That shit is FUN! What you need to do at night is grab you a 40oz, get on the freeway and punch it to 85, and turn off the lights! Boy, that shit will bug you out!

 

 

I've been in jail a few times with people pissing in the corner and fighting and all that shit. It's pretty fuckin' horrible.

 

Being locked up is a unique experience. You meet all kinds of interesting people in there.

 

Good that you made it out with no injuries or diseases, though. Glad to have you back around here.

[Retard Girl]

Milky, i'm glad you made it out with your anal virginity in tact.

 

 

......wait

[Nighthawk]

County isn't like prison, it's too short term for desperation to set in, so there wasn't a lot of gay shit going on.

 

They do ask what your sexual orientation is when they book you in (I said straight for the sake of convenience).

[Bruiser Chong]

I sense this thing with my neighbor will be a recurring theme throughout the summer. I just came home and he's sitting outside shirtless with the neighbor's cat. He gives that damn thing more attention than its owner does. I was getting ready to leave yesterday while he was playing with it yesterday before telling it that he had to go to work.

[Richard]

My fucking geriatric cat sprayed my bed.

[Bruiser Chong]

Ah cats. I've yet to hear a piece of evidence that justifies having them as pets. Less mess than dogs, yeah, but infinitely more useless.

[Guest Vitamin X]

What "use" do you get out of dogs, anyways?

 

Annoying, barking, codependent messes they are. You can teach a cat to flush a toilet and probably to feed itself. It's like having a lazy roommate, only you don't expect it to do anything except keep you company and be chill. And entertain on occasion.

[Guest Tzar Lysergic]

I have a fantastic cat. It butchered a mouse in front of my girlfriend in gory enough fashion that she called me at work at 2:30 AM to report it.

[The Metal Maniac]

I've yet to hear a piece of evidence that justifies having them as pets. Less mess than dogs, yeah, but infinitely more useless.

 

Actually, if nothing else, cats are handy for keeping away vermin. They don't even have to kill the things, they just need to make the house smell like cat and you're not gonna have many mice running through there.

 

I've known people in apartments who complained of mice, but the guy down the hall never ever saw one - cuz he owned a cat.

 

Plus, a purring cat is extremely relaxing. However, a meowing cat when you're trying to sleep is a reason for me to yell at the damned thing that I'm gonna boot it across the hall if it doesn't shut the fuck up. Course I'd yell basically the same thing at a barking dog, so whatever.

[Twisted Intestine]

 

I'd like to see you tell this guy you're gunna boot it across the hall.

[Guest]

My dog is a garbage disposal. These kids make messes all the time, and my dog cleans them up. There, better than a cat.

 

I'm glad to have a dog that doesn't bark. Well, unless I make fists at it.

[PUT THAT DICK IN MY MOUTH!]

video proof that dogs are sweeter than cats

 

 

 

[Twisted Intestine]

So what? Cat's can do that too.

 

[luke-o]

I threw up on a bus this morning.

[King Kamala]

I once threw up in a crowded McDonalds.

[Retard Girl]

 

I'd like to see you tell this guy you're gunna boot it across the hall.

 

 

 

hahaa, chow dogs can be fucking vicious. i know from experience. my chow (mixed breedish, but mostly chow) was smallish, but her bark was outrageous. she barked like a huge rottie or something. people were wicked afraid of her. and she ate the gross leftover food in the pans, which is the dog's primary job... isn't it? scaring people and eating messy leftovers.

 

i love dogs.

[Twisted Intestine]

That's not a chow dog... Here's one with people for scale purposes.

 

http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/52248939.jp...55A1E4F32AD3138

[luke-o]

Dogs are lame.

[Nighthawk]

I've never actually had a dog, but I've had like 25/30 cats (the discrepancy is whether I should consider some strays that were fed and just stuck around as being "mine").

 

I'll probably get a dog at some point. I'm 90% that if I end up getting a dog, I'll get a greyhound.

[Twisted Intestine]

I don't see why there always has to be a divide between cat people and dog people. They're both great pets.

[RepoMan]

Autisic 13 Year Old Banned From Mass

 

I feel bad for the kid and his family, but I can see where the church is coming from. He already attacked a kid, and at 6 feet, 225 he must have super retard strenght. Plus, I'm sure he's noisy as hell. But you'd hope that a congergation would be a little more forgiving and tolerate, esp. if their dogma sez the kid's soul is at stake.

[Nighthawk]

I don't see why there always has to be a divide between cat people and dog people. They're both great pets.

 

There's a divide between cats and dogs themselves, so it's only natural. Tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme.

[Failed Bridge]

who's the nigger now FB... who's the nigger now?

I did my job though and didn't sell shit over by the back fence for discounted prices like this former employee did who was black (and his name was Cletus...I kid you not) so I'm not a nigger. I didn't even sleep...I just sat in a picked clean Subaru for an extra 45min and texted people.