The OAO Raw thread for 08.01.05

[The Amazing Rando 0]

I think HBK's promo and Matt's return were the only things I enjoyed on tonight's show. This Raw was a huge miss all around; did they intentionally make the show suck since they knew the crowd wouldn't be very vocal?

 

Whatever the case, this isn't a good sign.

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This show will be used as proof that Jericho shouldn't be in a world title feud. I just know it. Nevermind Jericho wasn't actually wrestling.

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Add on a "Cena's not ready to run with the ball."

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Triple H strikes again or just shitty writing?

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Anybody know how many Raw writers there alledgedly are? This would be excusable if it was just 2 guys, but apparently Stephanie's got an entire army of trained monkeys at her disposal.

 

At this rate, I'll not be watching after Summerslam.

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Don't worry, man...the writers aren't even watching now, and they get PAID to do it.

[The Niggardly King 0]

The only positive I can think of for tonight was watching Tatanka and his spare tire.

 

I also liked hearing Matt Hardy fuck up a basic word and Lita's name.

[Guest JMA]

WWE needs to avoid having shows in this area again. The terrible crowd contributed to the already terrible card.

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Don't blame the pedestrians for the car wreck.

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The show was already a car wreck, the pedestrians just poured gasoline on it and lit a match.

[Dangerous A 0]

Y2Jerk, there are now a total of 14 writers on creative per the Observer,

[The Amazing Rando 0]

WWE needs to avoid having shows in this area again. The terrible crowd contributed to the already terrible card.

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Don't blame the pedestrians for the car wreck.

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The show was already a car wreck, the pedestrians just poured gasoline on it and lit a match.

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The pedestrians fucked the dead bodies inside and then giggled at the blood. Then Zack Malibu took his picture with the wreck.

[Silence 0]

Poor Zack Malibu. I can only imagine what he must be going through after going to a shitty Raw.

[Ted the Poster 0]

WWE needs to avoid having shows in this area again. The terrible crowd contributed to the already terrible card.

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Don't blame the pedestrians for the car wreck.

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The show was already a car wreck, the pedestrians just poured gasoline on it and lit a match.

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The pedestrians fucked the dead bodies inside and then giggled at the blood. Then Zack Malibu took his picture with the wreck.

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Followed by HHH, sho stacked all the bodies onto a cart and ran away screaming "MINE!" while whacking off.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

Poor Zack Malibu.  I can only imagine what he must be going through after going to a shitty Raw.

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I'll give you a hint ... her indian name is "Amused By Screech"

[SuperJerk 0]

Y2Jerk, there are now a total of 14 writers on creative per the Observer,

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Fucking hell?

 

Too many chefs really do spoil the broth, I guess.

 

They've got until the August 22nd episode of Raw to get me interested. If not, I'm out. I already dropped Smackdown (again). I almost dropped Raw in 2004, but then Benoit jumped over and was champ for 5 months. That reason no longer applies, obviously.

 

What's sad is that they finally put Jericho in a main event feud again, and they still found a way to make it boring.

[The Niggardly King 0]

The only positive I can think of for tonight was watching Tatanka and his spare tire.

 

I also liked hearing Matt Hardy fuck up a basic word and Lita's name.

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Oh yeah, and the ConWay theme. That one's a keeper!

[The Amazing Rando 0]

WWE needs to avoid having shows in this area again. The terrible crowd contributed to the already terrible card.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

Don't blame the pedestrians for the car wreck.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

The show was already a car wreck, the pedestrians just poured gasoline on it and lit a match.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

 

The pedestrians fucked the dead bodies inside and then giggled at the blood. Then Zack Malibu took his picture with the wreck.

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Followed by HHH, sho stacked all the bodies onto a cart and ran away screaming "MINE!" while whacking off.

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I would say that a dozen dead bodies have more intellect and creativity than his current wife, and probably don't nag as much when you try and fuck their windpipe.

[Ted the Poster 0]

WWE needs to avoid having shows in this area again. The terrible crowd contributed to the already terrible card.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

Don't blame the pedestrians for the car wreck.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

The show was already a car wreck, the pedestrians just poured gasoline on it and lit a match.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

 

The pedestrians fucked the dead bodies inside and then giggled at the blood. Then Zack Malibu took his picture with the wreck.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Followed by HHH, sho stacked all the bodies onto a cart and ran away screaming "MINE!" while whacking off.

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I would say that a dozen dead bodies have more intellect and creativity than his current wife, and probably don't nag as much when you try and fuck their windpipe.

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Plus, you don't necessarily have to go at the windpipe via the mouth.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

I would say that a dozen dead bodies have more intellect and creativity than his current wife, and probably don't nag as much when you try and fuck their windpipe.

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Plus, you don't necessarily have to go at the windpipe via the mouth.

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I know I wouldn't.

[Ted the Poster 0]

I would say that a dozen dead bodies have more intellect and creativity than his current wife, and probably don't nag as much when you try and fuck their windpipe.

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Plus, you don't necessarily have to go at the windpipe via the mouth.

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I know I wouldn't.

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"Boy, that sure is one sexy lung!"

[Matt Young 0]

The only positive I can think of for tonight was watching Tatanka and his spare tire.

 

I also liked hearing Matt Hardy fuck up a basic word and Lita's name.

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I'm pretty sure Matt knows how to properly pronounce Lita's name, and the rest of us were wrong by assuming it was pronounced "doo-moss".

[SuperJerk 0]

The only positive I can think of for tonight was watching Tatanka and his spare tire.

 

I also liked hearing Matt Hardy fuck up a basic word and Lita's name.

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I'm pretty sure Matt knows how to properly pronounce Lita's name, and the rest of us were wrong by assuming it was pronounced "doo-moss".

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Good point.

 

And fuck that "Count of Monte Cristo" writer guy.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

I would say that a dozen dead bodies have more intellect and creativity than his current wife, and probably don't nag as much when you try and fuck their windpipe.

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Plus, you don't necessarily have to go at the windpipe via the mouth.

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I know I wouldn't.

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"Boy, that sure is one sexy lung!"

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I thought we were talking about Steph, not Terri.

[cabbageboy 0]

It would help if they ever had Jericho, oh I dunno, DO SOMETHING to prove he even deserves to get a title shot. As much as I detest the neverending JBL push on Smackdown at least there is some logical basis of late as to why he is getting title shots.

 

As bad as Smackdown has been of late at least the show for the most part is about wrestling and competition, well aside from the recent Eddie developments.

 

You know the sad part? Rob Conway and Val Venis had a perfectly acceptable match tonight and it seemed like half the crowd started chanting "This match sucks" at them. Given the pathetic lack of in ring action the crowd absolutely should not shit all over a match (which wasn't horrible or anything). The last thing needed is the message that the fans don't even want wrestling matches.

 

Anyway I did like some stuff tonight. The Vince/Matt announcement was pretty cool, though I couldn't help but think that Matt's heat was already dying once he did his long promo and mentioned wanting to see Edge die in a car wreck, etc. Also his promo veered off into Russo 2000 territory in flat out discussing that the Lita/Kane marriage was phony and a booked part of the show.

 

How wild is it that I just watched a Raw from 1996 on the 24/7 package and it had maybe Tatanka's last WWF match vs. UT? Then I see him tonight. And that same show had a parody skit of Billionaire Ted on Larry Fling...and tonight we had Hulk Michaels on the Larry King show.

[notJames 0]

I wasn't sold at all with Hardy's promo. There's one thing to add a little reality to spice things up and give a nod to the smarts out there. It's another to completely obliterate the fourth wall and say, "Okay, this stuff we've been doing is fake. But this stuff... this is real. Seriously." Kinda takes the steam out of maintaining your suspension of disbelief.

 

Plus, you could tell, Hardy was losing steam as his diatribe went on. I was so afraid he'd lose the crowd with his puffed-up rantings about wanting Edge dead; the car accident thing made me feel very uncomfortable, and I'm sure it put off a lot of people in the arena. I hope this Hardy/Edge feud has enough gas in it, because once it's over, I'm not sure how "over" Hardy will be afterward, especially if he loses.

 

As for "Buff" Conway, I think the crowd was right. That match sucked. They needed to do some kind of series of vignettes to get the crowd acclimated with Rob Conway version 3.0 before trotting him out for a match, especially with an audience that didn't seem like a strong wrestling crowd (y'know, the way Philly and Chicago have a strong storied history with wrestling).

[Ted the Poster 0]

I thought we were talking about Steph, not Terri.

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It's called LFing.

[Aero 0]

Raw really is much better when you're watching with someone else to make fun of it.

 

The Diva Search segment tonight was the worst for this year's Diva Search. I really felt bad for the live crowd. First, the Vince-Matt promo (promos or interviews aren't usually fun live), then Conway-Venis, then HBK video (videos aren't fun for a live crowd either, even if they are actually funny), THEN the Diva Search. Yikes.

 

I really hate JR. His commentary really lacks any continuity or reason. So last week, Eugene answers Angle's challenge, despite not being from Cleveland. Coach & King even point it out, but JR doesn't care. ("Bah gawd, King, how can you NOT like Eugene?"). So, when Angle wants to win the medals back tonight... "HE'S FROM PITTSBURGH! NOT MOHEGAN SUN! DAMN HIM STRAIGHT TO HELL!" Obviously, the last part didn't happen, but he seemed one second away from going there.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

I thought we were talking about Steph, not Terri.

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It's called LFing.

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For years I thought those were her shoulder blades.... but they were really just dents from the application process.

[strummer 0]

The crowd going apeshit during the opening tag and the dead crowd in the Venis/Conway match proves that even in this day and age fans will respond to pushed wrestlers more and will shit on wrestlers who have no direction or focus (no matter how talented). Vince was probably creaming himself at the heat Masters got.

[SuperJerk 0]

Raw really is much better when you're watching with someone else to make fun of it.

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Or have a forum full of smart-asses to post on.

[Ted the Poster 0]

I thought we were talking about Steph, not Terri.

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It's called LFing.

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For years I thought those were her shoulder blades.... but they were really just dents from the application process.

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Fun fact: Terri's implants are actually gerbil exercise balls.

[Silence 0]

You know the sad part?  Rob Conway and Val Venis had a perfectly acceptable match tonight and it seemed like half the crowd started chanting "This match sucks" at them.  Given the pathetic lack of in ring action the crowd absolutely should not shit all over a match (which wasn't horrible or anything).  The last thing needed is the message that the fans don't even want wrestling matches.

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I unfortunately noticed the lack of heat for that match. Great, now Stephanie's going to cut down the number of matches per show to 2 every week just because of a horrible crowd!

[Ted the Poster 0]

Raw really is much better when you're watching with someone else to make fun of it.

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Or have a forum full of smart-asses to post on.

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Wha? Where?!

[cabbageboy 0]

The only real knock I had with the Conway/Val match was that it seemed like a typical Heat fare, whereas on Raw they should step it up a notch. The sad aspect of it is that I like Conway and heard they want to push him, but after the reception he got tonight....eh.

 

Raw desperately needs someone who can bust some moves out. I'll be glad when Van Dam gets back, if nothing else he'll actually wrestle matches and do some wild spots....lord knows they won't put him on the mic for 10 mins a la Matt tonight.

 

Incidentally, what was with Matt saying all that shit about "Edge took away my chance at a family, to have kids, etc." Dude, you can't be like Uncle Eddie and knock up some skank or something? Get over it, holmes. Get a new chick.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

I thought we were talking about Steph, not Terri.

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It's called LFing.

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For years I thought those were her shoulder blades.... but they were really just dents from the application process.

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Fun fact: Terri's implants are actually gerbil exercise balls.

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Fun Fact: Richard Gere will now get implants.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

You know the sad part?  Rob Conway and Val Venis had a perfectly acceptable match tonight and it seemed like half the crowd started chanting "This match sucks" at them.  Given the pathetic lack of in ring action the crowd absolutely should not shit all over a match (which wasn't horrible or anything).  The last thing needed is the message that the fans don't even want wrestling matches.

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I unfortunately noticed the lack of heat for that match. Great, now Stephanie's going to cut down the number of matches per show to 2 every week just because of a horrible crowd!

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And sadly, those two matches will be the Raw 10 o'clock main the the Smackdown ME... one with have Chris Masters in it, the other JBL.