Comments that which don't warrant a thread

[Jingus 0]

This is completely changing the subject, but I'm prepared that I admit that I sort of like Wild Wild West. Will Smith and Kenneth Branaugh are charismatic, Kevin Kline is passable. Sure, the part where they traded black/cripple jokes was cringeworthy, but the the steampunk elements were badass. I'm a major fan of steampunk, yet somehow all the movies that get made in the genre mostly suck.

There are a few animes which do some decent work in the steampunk niche, but yeah, I can't think of a live-action flick offhand which did it well. Stardust had a tiny bit of it with the lightning-collecting airship, but it was more of a fairy tale.

 

As for Wild Wild West, the part which made me just give up was when the Fresh Prince inexplicably sneaks into the villain's secret fortress, dressed in drag, and actually makes the baddies believe he's really a woman and seduces them with belly-dancing. Nobody but Bugs Bunny should ever be allowed to do that bullshit. I can believe the giant technospider a hell of a lot easier than I could buy that. Plus it was just unnecessarily meaner and grosser than a Will Smith summer blockbuster needs to be, what with the severed heads and the mass slaughter of the innocent negroes and bizarre surgical deformities and all that needlessly yucky stuff.

[King Kamala 0]

Wild Wild West and Ready To Rumble are probably the two worst movies I liked when I was 13. Fuck, I own the latter. For some reason, it's been playing on HBO a lot lately and I watched it a week or so back and I couldn't comprehend why I liked it so much back in the day. Sure, you had the wrestling stuff but I also saw No Holds Barred when I was a kid and knew it wasn't that good so it couldn't have been just that. Hmm, the director of Ready To Rumble also directed Norbit, The Shaggy Dog, and Good Burger. Clearly, the man must be stopped.

 

 

Wild Wild West has some mildly amusing stuff in it but it's definitely terrible. Not something I'd proudly boast of enjoying. Though I've proclaimed my love for Pootie Tang numerous times here so I may not be one to talk. I bet Clooney's really glad he narrowly avoided playing Kevin Kline's part. IIRC, he was actually cast and they advertised the Smith/Clooney team up briefly in the trade papers. If he had done Batman and Robin and that, he'd probably be stuck doing TNT original movies like the rest of his former ER castmates

[Nighthawk 0]

Speaking of Clooney, I'm actually interested in Burn After Reading, primarily from the cast, and of that primarily from Brad Pitt. He's been one of my favorite actors for a while, but I think now that he's in his mid 40s, he's got this world weary tiredness to him that sort of enhances his performance. He looks awesome in that.

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

I'm dissapointed no "Four Post Massacre" spots ever occurred after Ready to Rumble (which implied they were a regular occurrence to write off characters). The closest thing I can recall to that spot ever happening was at SummerSlam 93 with Bigelow/Headshrinkers, and that was only a 3 post massacre (and it missed).

[King Kamala 0]

I'm disappointed that the excuse for David Arquette's ill fated heel turn in WCW wasn't related to DDP's being a dick to Jimmy King.

 

Heck, I'm disapointed Oliver Platt didn't show up as Jimmy King on Nitro and try to battle The New Blood. The only part of the movie that stuck out to me as being (very very mildly) amusing when I watched it the other day was him telling Mean Gene that he was sexy. Another good thing that I think came out of that movie was the all too short lived sleazy pervert Mean Gene angle.

[Nighthawk 0]

I swear to God, I don't even remember that movie at all. I remember David Arquette as world champ, but I seriously don't remember even hearing of it.

[King Kamala 0]

WCW really didn't seem to hype it all that much. At least not to the extent WWE has with their shitty movies At least I mean they gave David Arquette the World title but I don't remember them promoting the actual movie that much.

 

 

Sad thing is, it's way more entertaining than any of the WWE Films. It's probably technically worse but all of the WWE Films are just boring bad, Ready To Rumble has a certain trainwreck quality to it.

 

There's a truly awful semi-recent wrestling comedy that no one else except me has seem to have seen called Slammed. It makes Ready To Rumble look like a brilliant piece of social satire. The oldest brother from Home Improvement teams up with the guy from the Dungeons and Dragons movie and Cody from Step By Step to conquer the world of bar room wrestling. Oh and somewhere along the line, Tiny Lister jerks off. John O'Hurley's in it too for some reason. Easily the worst wrestling movie I've seen but at the same time, oddly entertaining!

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

That sounds amazing.

[Ravenbomb 0]

Wasn't there one called Backyard Dogs or something with the original Black Ranger in it?

[King Kamala 0]

Yep, it also has Frankie Kazarian and Hayabusa in it. Somehow I've managed to avoid it. There was a time when it was the only movie on IMDb to have a 1.0 rating. Oh and apparently the heroes are trying to get into FMW out of all wrestling organizations.

 

 

After writing that post on Slammed, I'm considering doing a bad wrestling movies mini-festival at my house. Slammed, Backyard Dogs, Ready To Rumble, and No Holds Barred! What a craptacular evening of entertainment.

[Ravenbomb 0]

Don't forget the Ad Asner movie. Wasn't it just called The Wrestler or something? You should end it with Night and the City to counteract all the suck from the previous movies.

[King Kamala 0]

Yeah, The Wrestler. I saw that reletively recently. Not that terrible. There are one or two really cool scenes and there are a shitton of awesome camoes but it's mostly just boringly mediocre. Sadly, it's probably the "best" wrestling movie. At least, it doesn't aggresively suck like the others. I've got a lot of hope for the Darren Aronofsky wrestling movie coming out next year (incidentally also titled The Wrestler). If that one manages to suck than there is no hope for a decent movie about pro wrestling. I always thought Altman could have done a decent movie about wrestling but that's not happening now...

 

I just saw Night and The City like a month or so ago and it is indeed awesome but calling it a wrestling movie is kind of pigeonholing it. It's a film noir with wrestling. I may have to include it though to counteract the suck.

[Ravenbomb 0]

Yeah, Night and the City isn't really about wrestling, but I couldn't think of a good movie that IS about wrestling.

[Gary Floyd 0]

Hellboy and Abe Sapien drunk singing Barry Manilow's "Can't Smile Without You"=funniest movie moment of the year IMO.

[Nighthawk 0]

I'm spending a quiet evening at home (why do I get blackout drunk when I have to work the next day, then just sit around on the weekend. that makes absolutely no sense), and I'm watching Pinochio on video, which I picked up for 50 cents. I haven't watched a video tape in while, and fuck, these previews are long. I forgot how tiring that shit could be.

[Jingus 0]

I miss VHS, since I knew so much about it. I was in the A/V geek circle in high school, shooting our own little videos and stuff. We had a sweet Super VHS professional editing setup, with a high-quality mixer and greenscreen capabilities and everything. I actually knew more about the gear and could get it to do more stuff than the teacher of the class. Plus I could repair broken videotapes, and even broken VCRs if the problem was simple enough. Then the digital revolution comes around and makes all that learning obsolete. Sigh.

 

But yah, the previews were sometimes really fuckin' long when they'd stack half a dozen of those fuckers in a row, and unlike trailers in the theater it's always for old shit you don't care about. Plus copywright stuff, FBI warnings, studio logos, etc. It could easily be ten minutes before you got to the actual movie.

[Nighthawk 0]

Here's a bad one: an ad for the soundtrack of the movie you're watching, often containing spoilers.

[Nighthawk 0]

Honest John in Pinocchio: "Hi diddle de day: an actor's life is gay."

 

Yup yup.

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

I often see a movie called "Blood and Guts" about wrestling airing here. I watched a bit of it and didn't like it because despite being from 1979 or so, it didn't maintain kayfabe. Come on now.

[luke-o 0]

Last night I watched Fido (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0457572/), it was OK. Not a bad zombie film but it did have it's tounge placed firmly in it's cheeck.

 

But it wasn't as good as it could have been for the idea that they had.

[The Niggardly King 0]

Wasn't there one called Backyard Dogs or something with the original Black Ranger in it?

 

great fucking movie... best 95 minutes of my life

[King Kamala 0]

I can't believe I forgot to mention Body Slam when I mentioned wrestling movies. That was one of my favorites as a kid. Roddy Piper! Faceman! Captain Lou Albano! Charles Nelson Reilly! How could I forget? How could I forget?

[DrVenkman PhD 0]

I loved it when Spike TV was running that movie all the time. Ric Flair is in it too!

[King Kamala 0]

Can't forget Bruno Sammartino! And The Powers of Pain and Captain Lou Albano as the bad guys. Everybody's favorite little person Billy Barty also shows up.

 

 

Why oh why isn't this movie on DVD?

[Nighthawk 0]

Everybody's favorite little person Billy Barty also shows up.

 

Hm, you know, reading this I actually just drew up a quick draft of my favorite midgets. This is probably wrong, as I shouldn't have a list of like, my favorite black people or something.

 

Bridget the Midget wins by a country mile, but I think Billy Barty is second. Verne Troyer is dead last.

[King Kamala 0]

I smell another draft! (joking! joking! Please no one take this idea seriously).

 

 

Billy Barty and Bridget The Midget are high up there for me as well. But I think my favorite is Warwick Davis. I love Return of The Jedi, The Leprechaun series from #3 on is a huge guilty pleasure for me (I can't be the only one on here who likes that series, can I?), and the scene where he was smoking weed with Jamie Foxx in Ray was probably the highlight of that movie for me. Verne Troyer would probably be towards the end of that list for me as well.

 

 

[Jingus 0]

Verne Troyer is dead last.

I dunno, Mini-Me got me to chuckle at least a couple times. Which is more than I can say for Tony Cox. That little fucker has been in about nine thousand movies, and has yet to make me laugh once. Especially in the last few years, when he was in Date Movie, Epic Movie, and Who's Your Caddy back to back. If that ain't reason to blackball an actor from the industry, I don't know what is.

[Ravenbomb 0]

Favorite midget = Peter Dinklage

[King Kamala 0]

How could I forget The Dink? He's way up there in the pantheon of great midgets there's no denying that. I don't know if he beats Warwick or Billy Barty but it's close.

 

Speaking of Billy Barty, Have we talked about UHF here lately? That movie still kills me. I grew out of Weird Al's music years and years ago but there are a good half dozen scenes in that movie that make me lose it. I think what Dirty Work is to Barron, UHF is to me. Yeah, the acting is generally terrible and some of the gags are lame brained but I'll always love it.

[At Home 0]

UHF is an awesome movie. I'll always love it too.

 

I watched Superbad 4 times today. FOUR FUCKING TIMES. God I have to get out of the house.