Taking a Crap At Work

[Man Who Sold The World 0]

Who does it?

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

None. I'm a wild man.

[Nightfall 0]

I use the handicapped stall, and hold on to the rail. I hover above the seat, and a little to the side so when the load drops, it doesn't hit the water and splash on me, it hits right next to it and slides down.

 

Perfection.

[Sideburnious 0]

^

 

 

 

 

But also i'd say at least one of my breaks is spend with me being in the toilet.

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

I hope you at least flush before going in there.

[Man Who Sold The World 0]

When I worked at a grocery store there was this one stall in the mens bathroom that always had the funniest/craziest shit written on the side wall. Like people are really that bored that while they're on the shitter they graffitti shit like Donkey Kong grabbing the Death Star or a stick figure with a penis and a bubble saying "I'll give you ten inches". It was actually pretty entertaining when I was on the crapper. Good times.

[Sideburnious 0]

In went into the bathroom (in college) a few minutes ago, and one of the toilet seats had been ripped off the bowl, and left next to it. All I could think about is that someone (probbaly) went into the bathroom with the sole intention of walking into a stall an ripping the toilet seat off at the hinges. Who in their right mind would bother doing that? Who does it benefit?

 

Lucky the other stall was fine so I just sheeted it up, and then shitted it up (Har har).

[Skywarp! 0]

Drop a few well-placed wads of TP, and you'll neutralize the splashback effect.

[Red Baron 0]

I hate you people who uses the TP for a cushion and just leave it there.

 

Myself 3-point stance.

[tigeraid 0]

The day I worry about germs on my asscheeks is the day my balls fall off.

 

If there's piss or shit on the seat, I wipe it off with a handful of toilet paper. (if it's real bad, I go to another toilet.)

 

Germs'll get on you wether you're using pieces of paper or not. There's germs everywhere in the damn bathroom, that ain't gonna stop em.

[Dangerous A 0]

^^^^

 

 

Same here.

[Gert T 0]

I'm with the last two people, take a swipe across the seat, put your ass on the seat. Quit being nancy boys, if God wanted you to squat he'd have given you a vagina.

[Guest Montresor]

I have OCD; predictably, this thread is causing me great pain. I can't urinate in a rest room, much less defecate in one.

[DARRYLXWF 0]

Because I was in a car accident a couple of years ago I have to stand on my hands and poo into cylander that emerges from my side wall, horizontally. It's a little awkward but a neat little invention that compliments my limitations. So yeah, no paper of the seat for me.

[Guest Felonies!]

Well, nobody's gonna top that.

[Corey_Lazarus 0]

Seatcovers don't do shit but give you a false sense of security when you use the restroom. The human hand has more bacteria on it than the toilet seat does, more often than not.

[tigeraid 0]

I have OCD; predictably, this thread is causing me great pain. I can't urinate in a rest room, much less defecate in one.

 

I have minor diagnosed OCD as well, but not for cleanliness, more for tidiness. Straightening a picture frame, etc... If I leave a room and turn off the light, but the lightswitch doesn't physically go down all the way, I have to come back and push it all the way down. I'm insane.

 

But I can still piss in a public washroom.

 

Because I was in a car accident a couple of years ago I have to stand on my hands and poo into cylander that emerges from my side wall, horizontally. It's a little awkward but a neat little invention that compliments my limitations. So yeah, no paper of the seat for me.

 

[Man Who Sold The World 0]

I have OCD; predictably, this thread is causing me great pain. I can't urinate in a rest room, much less defecate in one.

 

[Guest Montresor]

What I mean is that I can't set foot in a public bathroom for any reason. I'd sooner urinate outdoors and risk arrest, a hefty fine, and jail time.

[Slayer 0]

I hate shared public restrooms because I hate dropping off the goods (liquid or solid) if I have to share the room with someone else.

 

One-man public restrooms (where you can lock yourself in) are fine though

[tigeraid 0]

You people are weird.

[Ravenbomb 0]

I don't poop, my metabolism naturally burns away all my waste

[Man Who Sold The World 0]

I got the runs. Comes out looking like chai tea.

[treble 0]

I'm more concerned with the lack of a lock on one of the stalls at work. They just replaced the toilet seat the other day (it was pretty nasty looking), but there's just a strip of tape where the lock used to be. I always have to stick my feet out the bottom of the door to make sure the person coming into the bathroom knows it's occupied.

[Epic Reine 0]

I don't take shits in public restrooms, just can't. I'd be really embarrassed to have people hearing me pass gas and hear the water splash after dropping a log.

 

Pissing is fine, though I have problems doing it if someone is standing at the urinal right next to me.

[St. Gabe 0]

Screw that, guys. I work midnites and I usually take a dump in the womans bathroom, its just cleaner. Lots of fancy lotions in there too.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

I luck out..at any given time there are no more than 4 guys including myself where I work to share the one mens room..not bad.

 

My only problem is the shower has no curtain now..I used to like taking a shower after work..but without a curtain..forget it.

[Man Who Sold The World 0]

Screw that, guys. I work midnites and I usually take a dump in the womans bathroom, its just cleaner. Lots of fancy lotions in there too.

 

I second that. Working for the movie industry rawks.

[tekcop 0]

I used to have this problem when I was a kid. Now I figure I'm to old to worry about that kind of stuff. Swipe and sit, I say.

[King Kamala 0]

Eh depends on how clean the restroom is.

 

I went to a Paul Rodgers/Kansas concert at the "lovely" Hampton Beach Casino Ballroom in the metropolis of Hampton Beach, New Hampshire in 2003 and the bathrooms were so scuzzy. Their was a no smoking rule at the venue per the artists requests so there were a bunch of people loitering in the bathroom smoking and some guy was yelling at me "HEY BUDDY TAKING A SHIT? COME ON, YOU'RE TAKING UP SMOKING ROOM!" Needless to say, I held it until after the show when I went into the conveniently nearby Atlantic Ocean.