SNL Season Finale Review- featuring a look back at the season

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SNL Season Finale Review- Kevin Spacey/Nelly Furtado

 

This is my annual season finale review/wrap up of SNL's 31st season. It's not as long as previous years, because after last years, there was no reason for me to try and top myself, so I decided to scale it back down again.

 

I hope you enjoy, and the review is in the next post.

 

In Memoriam 2005-2006-

 

Don Adams- I used to love watching Get Smart back in the day, and I was also a pretty big Tennessee Tuxedo fan. I mean, “Would you believe?”

 

Charles Rocket- I haven’t really seen much of his work or anything, so I’m not going to pretend to like the guy or anything but he’s the first member of the non-Lorne years to pass on, and he’s the first WU anchor to die. Him saying “I want to know who the fuck did it” was pretty fucking cool. RIP Charles Rocket.

 

Eddy Guerrero- Eddy was one of my favourite wrestlers. He was outstanding in the ring, and could also cut great promos and be hilarious or get an angle or promo over when needed. I loved his work with Edge, Benoit and Angle, and will always remember being at MSG and seeing him and RVD kill each other in a ladder match. I’m glad he was able to come all the way back from his personal problems, and I’ll never forget that excellent match he had with Brock at No Way Out. RIP Eddy, you were a great man.

 

Richard Pryor- I have some of Richard Pryor’s SNL on tape and it was hilarious. That skit with him and Chevy Chase (Nigger! Dead honky!) is one of my favourite SNL skits. Pryor was a great comic, and I remember, even on Norm, he could still get a laugh. RIP.

 

Don Knotts- Barney Fife is one of my favourite characters of all time, and I loved the Andy Griffith Show. Mr. Furley was great as well. RIP Don, thanks for the memories. Barney Fife will live on forever.

 

Pithy Comments!- (Times I tried to be funny and times I ranted)

 

I also laughed when Bill Hader called him a dick. Welcome to the show Bill. Word of advice: If you want to make me laugh really hard, say cock. It’s funnier. (Oops, it was Samberg)

 

So I went to NBC.com to check on how to spell Sudeikis’ name and found out that Rob Riggle’s bio is still up. That’s just cold. And funny.

 

I still haven’t officially noticed the difference between Samberg and Hader. This is like what happened with Seth and Jeff, but luckily, Seth broke out from the pack and Jeff Richards was fired. Still funny.

 

So, let me get this straight. Maya Rudolph is 8 months pregnant…and is still on the show. Chris Parnell is on a sitcom that is based in LA….and is still on the show. Tina Fey had a baby…and is still on the show. Horatio Sanz was in Rebound….and is still on the show. Christ, does anybody leave this show anymore?

 

Thoughts- I broke a pen during Update.

 

Hey, you know that show Family Guy with the dog who talks and all that? Well I watch Family Guy everyday with my roommate and while I think it’s funny, there are about a billion jokes and a lot of them miss. So one time, we started counting the jokes the hit and the ones that missed.

 

I did that with Update. I think the score was 2-943.

 

I still don’t get how Parnell is taping a sitcom and doing live sketch comedy. I guess he knows that Thick and Thin is the next Committed or something.

 

Women wearing ties went out in 1995 when Suzanne Somers was wearing them on Step by Step. They were beaten into the ground when Avril wore them in 2002. Hey, I love Avril to death, and even I thought they looked horrible. And Ashlee just looked stupid here.

 

Given that Seth is the writing supervisor, I thought this skit needed lots of supervision, since it had no point and thus sucked pretty badly.

 

I always thought the one silver lining to Jeff knocking her up was we wouldn’t have to see her on WU anymore. I was wrong. Jeff can’t even do this right

 

I thought Seth was hilarious, even though I took Latin for three years and I don’t remember hearing the word Boo-Yah.

 

I have absolutely no hope for Lance Armstrong next week, so I’m crossing my fingers that he falls off his bike or gets cancer or something. (That one seemed to offend people. Oops)

 

I don’t know why SNL didn’t get Miguel Indurain to host back in the 90s, I mean that guy won 5 Tour de Frances in a row…and he has two testicles. Or Greg LeMond. I mean dude got shot, and went on to win the Tour. Jan Ulrich would’ve been a good host too.

 

I have to say that I think I’d be more likely to get out of the house if I had some annoying 80s synthesizer music playing.

 

Thoughts- Call me a sucker for lowbrow humour but I laughed at this much more then I should have. Cancer of the BUTT is just a funny thing to say. Plus, the words pooper and fudge always make me laugh. So kudos to SNL for that. ***

 

On Darrell’s performance in Hardball- Generally, being sober is a good way to make sure that you read the cue cards correctly and don’t trip over your words. I’m not implying anything, just making a public service announcement.

 

On Jack Johnson’s barefoot thingie whatever- Here’s my problem with this skit. Well besides the fact that it wasn’t funny and ripping on Jack Johnson is quite an out there person to be ripping on.

 

People who go barefoot, obviously like the feeling of being barefoot or else they would wear shoes like everyone else. So why would anyone wear barefoot shoes? I mean you’re not barefoot, as you would have padding underneath your feet, thus deleting the whole point of wanting to go barefoot in the first place. Plus, people who go barefoot all the time, generally do it to be different and not conform to society. So wearing a barefoot like shoe is conforming and giving into the man, something I’m sure is a no-no in the barefoot community.

 

I mean seriously, this is almost as bad as the time SNL did a skit about a talking movie….in 1923. Surely there’s someone out there that knows their continuity!

 

On the Longoria cold opening- First of all….no WAKE UP HAND JIVE!~ from David Gregory? Colour me disappointed. The skit would’ve been an automatic **** if it had that. Even though it lacked the WAKE UP HAND JIVE!~, this was still a solid Cold Opening.

 

I like Korn and all but this was not very good. The song is dull, and I kept flipping back to CBC to see why some guy on Chicago got ejected. Leave it to CBC to not show a single replay. My tax dollars at work.

 

While I’m all for Seth getting increased airtime, not in some stupid skit about German singers trying to hide the fact that they killed a guy. I mean they could’ve at least said Klaus was Jewish or something.

 

Longoria should’ve gone out with Manu Giboli. That guy is great at eating pussy.

 

I also enjoyed hearing Alec acknowledge one of the perks of hosting 10+ times, the right to grope Amy Poehler’s breasts, just like I did in my review. See?

 

I guess one of the perks of getting to host 10+ times is the chance to grope Amy Poehler's breasts.

 

On Baldwin O’Reilly Factor- Poor Jeff Richards. A quick check of tastyjeff.com reveals that he is now selling Drunk Girl t-shirts. Poor bastard.

 

Is Dean Edwards going to cameo in January? Because if so, that would be the greatest moment in SNL history. Come on, you know if during some random skit, Dean walked in as Cop #2 that you’d all go crazy too.

 

who on the writing staff has gay fantasies about gay aliens? I’m looking at you Andrew Steele!

 

Now I could be a douche and point out that in a lot of spelling bees, the minute you spell a letter wrong, you’re disqualified. Now I could also be all pop culture and reference the spelling bee between Davey Chew and Stephanie Tanner in the Full House where Stephanie learns about pneumonic devices to learn how to spell, but then in the cruelest of ironies, doesn’t learn how to spell pneumonic and Davey wins. The way Davey emphasized the letter Stephanie misspelled made him such a douche. Michelle learned to read the word ‘cat’ in that episode, too. Or I could go all Jamie Klein on you and instead of talking about the skit, talk about how when I was 7, I spelled shoelaces, instead of shoelace, because I misheard the word. (The irony is that in my rant, I used the wrong pneumonic, it should be mnemonic)

 

Conceivably, if Seth was fast asleep, they could move him out of the way and Horatio and Scarlett could just have sex that way, assuming Scarlett’s orgasm wouldn’t be that loud and she could keep her mouth shut. The guitar thing, Seth does have a legit gripe about, but then again we don’t really know the inner workings of the boat. I know I nitpicked the spelling bee skit last time and got the mnemonic thing wrong, but hopefully this time I didn’t make any screw-ups.

 

Wow, good to see Seth in the cold open. Given the quality of this show he probably didn’t have that much writing to supervise.

 

On the Hotel Where Things Go Wacky- You know, if Sarsgaard was so unhappy with the TV, why didn’t he just go downstairs and either chill at the bar, or complain to the front desk personally. I mean he had his options!

 

Wow, Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin meeting up, that’s like ummm the two people who host MadTV a lot meeting up

 

It’s just a sad attempt to be Jon Stewart, and well Tina and Amy are a lot of things, funny as Jon Stewart is not one of them.

 

Oh, and Matt Dillon hosting= the awesome. (Oops)

 

I also think it’s some sort of sick joke to make Darrell wait around till 12:30 when you know he just wants to get the hell out of there.

 

On Surfers from the Steve Martin show- I really wanted to get into it, but it was so repetitive and just seemed like it wouldn’t end. Kind of like A Simple Twist of Fate!

 

Jamba Juice always confounded me because I thought they mainly served juices, but instead they mostly make smoothies. I guess they wanted Jamba Juice for alliteration, and something like Saucy Smoothies didn’t work.

 

Nune

Cast- Portman, Armisen, Maya Rudolph, Parnell, Sudeikis

Thoughts- Calgary is really polished right now and they looked great against San Jose, especially how they were suffocating them that third period. I mean I know San Jose has nothing besides Thorton and the people he plays on the line with, but really, you should’ve seen Calgary’s D. Oh, I watched the Hockey Night in Canada game rather then concentrating on the Nunes. But what I saw was really bad, and Maya Rudolph coming back helps nobody.

 

I have to say that Chris Parnell is a smart guy for not leaving to do Thick and Thin, considering it’s probably going to get Emily Reason’s Why Noted.

 

Andy Samberg seemed to have gone to the “DUR BUUUUUUUURGER”school of French accents.

 

I don’t think I realised unicorns weren’t real until a few years ago

 

Poor Hardball, I guess it’s officially been put out to pasture, thus making Darrell’s importance to this show, on a scale of 1-10, a –7.

 

On the Women Basketball Coaching Awards skit- I thought it was funny that you know the skit was going to be over after Amy came out, because then there are no more women.

 

I’ve never liked cats. They just sit there and do nothing and then go to the litter box. They never seem to show any affection and always seem pissed off. It’s like fuck you you douchebag, I take care of you, so show me some respect. A dog is more high maintenance, but I really like that. It requires a lot of responsibility, and you end up bonding with your dog more. With a dog, you have a real sense of companionship, while a cat just looks at you with disdain. You can walk a dog, can’t really walk a cat.

 

This is the problem with being in Canada, you’re out of the loop of the goings on of the Bush administration. It makes it easer to be a Republican.

 

Paul Simon rehearsed for this skit. This caused me to almost flip out and kill someone since Paul Simon playing a pedophile would’ve been the awesome. And it would finally answer what him and Julio were really doing down by the schoolyard.

 

Shakira feat. Horatio Sanz’s brother

Thoughts- No sé mi español demasiado bien sino que pienso que Shakira cantaba sobre un burrito que ella había comprado que era un pedacito demasiado picante, y el individuo de Sanz le decía sobre sus experiencias de cruzar la frontera de México en Tejas y del trabajo como diswasher. Ese Shakira dado vuelta encendido y ella se movieron los pechos. Paré el cuidar sobre lo que cantaban y bonito mirados fijamente mucho Shakira, aunque cogí a individuo de Sanz que le decía qué taco Bell tenía la mejor salsa de Chipolte. La canción aspirada, pero mi agolpamiento para Shakira es más grandes ahora entonces mi agolpamiento en Juventud Guerrera. Ahora si el plomo de todo el Shakira seguido las huéspedes musicales femeninas calientes, nosotros pudo ganar la guerra en terror.

**1/2

 

SNL Year in Review-

 

October 1st, 2005: SNL’s 31st season begins with a great lineup and a good show

Steve Carell/Kanye West

 

With their hosting picks for the season premiere, SNL decided to go with people who had notable Augusts and Septembers. Steve Carrell was coming off the 40 Year-Old Virgin and NBC was doing their best to make the Office a huge hit, and Kanye West informed people that George Bush did not care about black people in a hurricane telethon. The show would also feature the debuts of Bill Hader and Andy Samberg.

 

The show got off to a good start with a cold opening that showed Will Forte had truly made the George W. impression his own. As the show went along, it was pretty good with ***ish skits left and right. Kanye West even got into the act with a very funny skit poking fun at his remarks at the telethon.

 

And then it was time for Update. With Tina Fey off having just given birth, her replacement was…

 

Horatio Sanz.

 

Then I broke a pencil.

 

Any chance SNL had on trying to do something right with Update was pretty much washed away, as Horatio and Amy proceeded to do the worst Update since Brad Hall.

 

Sadly, that killed any of the good momentum that the show had built up, as it seemed to limp to a finish.

 

Still, Steve Carrell was a good host, and the season had gotten off to a good start.

 

October 8th, 2005- Ashlee Simpson returns!

Jon Heder/Ashlee Simpson

 

11 months after the hoedown debacle, many were abuzz over Ashlee Simpson’s return to SNL wondering what would happen.

 

Well, nothing happened.

 

She sang two songs, one of which was written about her experience on SNL. It was not very good. Then she sang her single at the time. It was also not very good.

 

Even though I did not like the show, at least SNL didn’t try to poke fun at the incident like they did last year and kept Ashlee’s airtime to a minimum.

 

So in the end, Ashlee’s return to SNL was pretty uneventful, just like the show itself.

 

October 29th, 2005- It doesn’t matter, if you’re an athlete, you can’t host SNL

Lance Armstrong/Sheryl Crow

 

It seems like every year SNL has to have an athlete host, and every year the show is not good.

 

This episode was no different then the previous shows hosted by athletes, except this one rode a bike.

 

The show got off to a bad start with a subpar cold open, and it was downhill from there. Like most athlete hosts, most of the skits had to be written around his lack of experience, resulting in a lot of clunky skits. I mean, an Indigo Girls skit? A skit involving Lance Armstrong singing to Sheryl Crow? Come on!

 

Sheryl Crow also assisted in a few skits, but nothing worked. Of the bits to hit ***, none were because of Lance. He joined Johnny Mosley, Tom Brady, Jeff Gordon, Andy Roddick in the list of athletes that just couldn’t get it done.

 

And in keeping with the tradition of Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger and Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey, Armstrong and Crow broke up a few months after this episode ended.

 

December 8th, 2005- Baldwin is back

Alec Baldwin/Shakira

 

When Alec Baldwin is hosting, you know you’re getting quality. And while the show had some misfires, I think this show helped SNL break out of its usual early season shell.

 

The show got off to an excellent start, with Baldwin participating in the cold opening, and Tim Meadows showing up in the monologue. The first collection of skits was fine, but like Carrell, the show just couldn’t retain its momentum and sputtered for a bit. Even TV Funhouse sucked.

 

A Tony Bennett saved it somewhat, but the show continued to sputter with a Carol and a skit where Alec marries a hot dog.

 

Luckily, there was one skit left, and SNL decided to spoof one of my favourites movie ever- Glengarry Glen Ross.

 

While it lacked Al Pacino calling Kevin Spacey a stupid cunt, Baldwin gave an excellent performance and his bitching out of Seth Meyers was classic. Baldwin also delivered a great blooper when instead of yelling A-Always B-Be C-Cobbling, he said closing. A really good way to end the show, and continue the momentum going into next week.

 

Even the episode wasn’t a classic or anything, it was still a very fun show and the cast was all on their game. It would be a sign of things to come…

 

December 15th, 2005- Oh, that’s who Andy Samberg is

Jack Black/Neil Young

 

I entered the Jack Black show with considerable expectations, given Black’s two previous appearances and the fact that they were coming off the Baldwin show. Thanks to one little rap, those expectations would definitely be met.

 

Like the Baldwin show, this show got off to a quick start with another great cold opening and a funny monologue. Then like Baldwin, the show started to sputter, but was able to quickly regain momentum with a succession of three funny skits.

 

Then came Lazy Sunday and SNL would forever be changed. It seems like every year or two, a skit occurs that makes the mainstream. From cowbell to the debates, Barry Gibb and Kermit, and Debbie Downer, Lazy Sunday quickly entered the mainstream.

 

Like Seth’s baseball commentary 4 years ago, this skit was Andy Samberg’s coming out party. Until Lazy Sunday, Andy was just the guy with the shaggy hair who everyone assumed would be Riggled at the end of the year.

 

Lazy Sunday was such a simplistic idea- two white guys rapping about their day with pop culture references galore.

 

But it turned into a sensation. Articles were written about it, and it helped launch the site youtube.com, where the skit exploded into even more popularity. Even the NY Times wrote about it, which is quite shocking, since the short said nothing bad about conservatives. And of course, tons of spoofs and parodies were made about it, and many catchphrases were spawned from it too.

 

It also established Andy Samberg and the SNL Digital Short. SNL Digital Shorts started becoming a regular feature on the show, and Andy was the breakout star. Somewhere Rob Riggle was hanging himself.

 

Unlike most skits that get mainstream attention, I thought Lazy Sunday warranted the hype. Parnell’s a great rapper and they finally put his skills to good use instead of him rapping about farfetched fantasies with celebrities, the lyrics were hilarious, it had a good beat and it mentioned the famous Alexander Hamilton-Aaron Burr duel.

 

The rest of the show was pretty good too. Two A-Holes debuted, Will Forte had another bizarre Will Forte skit, and even Neil Young had a good second song. Aside from a Debbie Downer, there was nothing to complain about this show.

 

In December, SNL had two hosts that should’ve merited good shows and they actually delivered. It was a good sign of things to come.

 

January 21st, 2006- SNL takes the week off…and it shows

Peter Sarsgaard/The Strokes

 

SNL fans were in a quite a tizzy when it was announced that Steve Martin and Prince was the lineup for February. But before they got to that episode, there was one more episode to go.

 

An episode hosted by the guy in Garden State not named Zach Braff and a band that people liked in 2002. Only it was 2006. I had a feeling SNL might half-ass this one, and they half-assed it times 10.

 

Once the cold opening ended, the show died fast. We got a Carol, a skit based on Sarsgaard’s last name and pirates, a skit about cats spoofing a movie no one has seen, and ANOTHER skit based on Sarsgaard’s last name.

 

After Update, I think SNL really wanted to hammer the point home that watching the Canucks game would’ve been a better option, as they did Gays in Space.

 

Uusually I get pretty upset when I see SNLs with an avg. skit below **, but I knew that the next episode was key, and this was just a filler episode.

 

Later in the season, Natalie Portman hosted and the episode was not very good, leading me to think that people from Garden State just shouldn’t host SNL.

 

When you have two skits based on someone’s last name, you know that this episode just wasn’t meant to work.

 

February 4th, 2006- The king returns

Steve Martin/Prince

 

It had been 11.5 years since Steve Martin had hosted SNL. Since then, John Goodman and Alec Baldwin had been catching up with his record. With Baldwin just one show away from tying it, and Goodman retired from hosting SNL, Martin had to put a little extra distance between himself and the competition. In case the show couldn’t be more exciting, Prince was the musical guest!

 

The show got off to a great start with a cameo filled cold opening that made light of the Baldwin-Martin competition. Parnell got to shine in a skit about credit card debt and Martin’s self-absorbed asshole persona was still garnering laughs, and Forte had another good bizarre Forte skit. Even Update was only 5 seconds long!

 

Unfortunately, like other potential amazing shows this season, the show had a slight drop off after Update. There were more good bits poking fun at Martin’s return to SNL, including a Jimmy Fallon cameo, and another good digital short, as the Lonely Island guys continued to show their worth. The last two skits were pretty eh and brought the show down.

 

So while it wasn’t blowaway show, I felt the show delivered. Martin was really funny and there were a lot of good skits built around him. They definitely made-up for phoning in the Sarsgaard show, and Martin showed why he’s the greatest host of all time.

 

May 6th, 2006- Don’t cut off my testicles

Tom Hanks/Red Hot Chili Peppers

 

It had been 9.5 years since Tom Hanks had hosted, but like Steve Martin, for some reason he felt like coming back this season. This was the first SNL season since 98-99 to have three members of the five-timers club host. (That season had Alec Baldwin, John Goodman and Bill Murray)

 

The Red Hot Chili Peppers being the musical guest caused this show to become the most anticipated show since Martin/Prince back in February.

 

Like the other shows with high expectations this season, this episode delivered. The show got off to a bumpy start as the first two real skits of the evening failed to provide much excitement. Then like it has so many times this season, the SNL Digital Short gave SNL a boost, as Don’t Cut Off my Testicles managed to almost be as funny as Lazy Sunday.

 

Given the spark that it needed, the show continued to roll along, and Hanks showed why he is considered one of SNL’s best hosts with a number of funny and versatile performances. The Red Hot Chili Peppers capped off what would be SNL’s best show of the season (well for a week) by performing one of their classic songs Give It Away.

 

One of the positives about SNL this season was the better host selection. Getting three 5-times plus people like Jack Black and Scarlett Johansson meant that fans could anticipate a good show rather then seeing how SNL could try to salvage a show.

 

May 13th, 2006- Just awesome

Julia Louis-Dreyfus/Paul Simon

 

I was excited for this show for one reason- Paul Simon. The host could’ve been Matthew McConaughey or Hilary Swank and I would’ve probably enjoyed this show. But SNL decided to do one better and make sure we didn’t have another Luke Wilson episode on our hands.

 

I was interested in Julia Louis-Dreyfus as a host, since SNL Alums usually do well, but well the Christine show kind of sucked. Little did I know, Julia, Paul and SNL were about to bang out the show of the year.

 

The episode began with a cameo by Al Gore. While I didn’t think it was that great, it gave off the impression that this was going to be a very special show. Same with the monologue. It wasn’t a great one, but with cameos from Jason Alexander and Jerry Seinfeld it again gave off an important vibe.

 

And then the skits began. Bill Hader played a homeless guy who talked about taking a dump on Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ stomach, there was a clever skit about a Murphy’s Law newscast, an awesomely creepy skit involving paedophiles on MySpace and then it was right into Paul Simon. He was amazing, and showed why he’s SNL’s most frequent go to musical guest.

 

The show had been going so well, that not even a few subpar post-Update skits could scuttle my goodwill. That’s because the first skit post-Update was hilarious and we got more Paul Simon!

 

The Julia Louis-Dreyfus show became the only episode to finish with an average skit over ***, and was truly a phenomenal show. It showed you don’t need to try to cram the show with as many great skits as possible. Almost every skit had a funny premise, good lines and performances and a good execution, and we ended up with my 6th favourite show over the past 6 seasons.

 

Of course, having a great musical guest didn’t hurt.

 

SNL: The Cliff Notes

 

10/1/05- Steve Carell/Kanye West/Adam Levine/Mike Myers

Avg. skit: **.54

 

A good host and a good musical guest usually equal a good show. Well it should anyway. The show had a bunch of good skits, two solid performances by Kanye, and a funny cameo by Mike Myers. Another Debbie Downer hurt the show a bit, but overall this was a solid way to start the season.

 

10/8/05- Jon Heder/Ashlee Simpson

Avg. skit: **.2

 

Ashlee, who hurt the average with two very crappy songs, overshadowed this episode. Even though Ashlee sucked, she wasn’t the only problem with this episode. There was a Ferecito, but a lot of the skits just fell flat and had no chance thanks to crappy premises and even crappier execution. On the bright side, this was the last time we’d see Horatio at the desk.

 

10/22/05-Catherine Zeta-Jones/Franz Ferdinand

Avg. skit: **.33

 

While Catherine Zeta-Jones looked hot, and Franz Ferdinand was a really good musical guest, this show did not deliver. Like the Heder show, a lot of the skits fell flat and many seemed just died on arrival. The Hot French Teacher was a nice little gem at the end, but the rest of the episode was just one lame skit after another.

 

10/29/05- Lance Armstrong/Sheryl Crow/Scott Podsednik

Avg. skit: **.13

 

This episode continued the trend of niche hosts never working. Armstrong tried but his lack of skill at acting and comedy was apparent and like the previous two shows, a lot of the skits just died on arrival. Not even Scott Podsednik could save this one.

 

11/12/05- Jason Lee/Foo Fighters

Avg. skit: **.5

 

SNL is lucky that the word cock makes me laugh really hard, or else this show would’ve joined the previous three in the lame category. Like the previous show, there were way too many skits that just didn’t work and came off as flat. Lee tried his best, and even helped deliver the best Falconer ever. And of course there was the skit about cock and a really good musical guest.

 

11/19/05- Eva Longoria/Korn

Avg. skit: **.43

 

Like Catherine Zeta-Jones, Longoria looked hot, but could not deliver a good show. The usual assortment of mediocrity that had been plaguing SNL since the first episode. A skit about the Spammie Awards and a Deephouse Dish? Awful. Luckily, Korn performed a kickass version of Freak on a Leash to salvage the show.

 

12/1/05- Dane Cook/James Blunt

Avg. skit: **.2

 

Wow, the first batch of these episodes kind of sucked. Aside from the cold opening and a rerun of a commercial, nothing topped ***. Dane Cook might be an okay comic, but sketch comedy is not his forte and it showed with the usual array of forgettable skits. James Blunt looking like a creepy paedophile didn’t help matters.

 

12/10/05- Alec Baldwin/Shakira/Alejandro Sanz/Tim Meadows

Avg. skit: **.62

 

The show that may have helped save the season. The show had three **** skits, Tim Meadows, Tony Bennett, Shakira exercising this chest, and a spoof of Glengarry Glen Ross. A Carol prevents this from being one of the best shows of the year, but it did kick some ass.

 

12/15/05- Jack Black/Neil Young/Johnny Knoxville/Darlene Love/Tracy Morgan/Kyle Gass

Avg. skit: **.82

 

This is the episode that spawned Lazy Sunday and for one episode made Andy Samberg’s haircut cool. It was just a really fun show from top to bottom, with Jack Black once again being a good host in his third stint. I’m going to love any show where Will Forte spells business-Brdtfklnghrkwtfnylkpqwqrtdfplmkqkwqqqqqqqqqqqqstfjrqmtsdtqmprftdpdplhrktetf

 

1/14/06- Scarlett Johansson/Death Cab for Cutie

Avg skit: **.51

 

The first episode to feature Hilary Duff music on the air, even if it was her weakest song from her first album. Oh and the show was good too. Even though the average skit wasn’t that high, I really enjoyed this show. Scarlett was a good host and there were a bunch of good clever skits scattered throughout the show.

 

1/21/06- Peter Sarsgaard/The Strokes/Drew Barrymore

Avg. skit: *.97

 

This show had a Carol AND a Gays in Space. That’s all I need to say about it.

 

2/4/06- Steve Martin/Prince/Kelly Ripa/Alec Baldwin/Tamar/Jimmy Fallon/Michael Anthony/Scarlett Johansson/Conan O’Brien/Gideon Yago

Avg. skit: **.77

 

Wow, that’s a lot of cameos. Martin was his usual awesome self, Prince was really good, and the cast made sure they didn’t blow what was their easiest chance for a good show. All those cameos were mostly from the digital shorts, for the record. It wasn’t the blowaway show that a lot of people expected, but I was happy with what I got.

 

3/4/06- Natalie Portman/Fall Out Boy/Dennis Haysburt

Avg. skit: **.38

 

The most memorable thing about this episode was their attempt to capitalise on the success of Lazy Sunday with the Natalie Portman rap. Of course it really wasn’t that funny. Not much else happened in this bland episode, except for the fact that they brought back Wake Up Wakefield. Which is not a good thing.

 

3/11/06- Matt Dillon/Arctic Monkeys

Avg. skit: **.27

 

A lot of people seemed to like this show, but it didn’t work for me. And I’m a Matt Dillon fan, so it was disappointing. The monologue had one of my favourite jokes of the year, but besides that there wasn’t much to this show. Dillon wasn’t as good a host as I hoped, and not even Bill doing Vincent Price could save it.

 

4/8/06- Antonio Banderas/Mary J. Blige/Chris Kattan

Avg. skit: **.52

 

The episode that broke the mini-slump. There was nothing great in this episode, but like a lot of shows this season, just a collection of good solid skits. Banderas was a good host and was willing to make fun of himself and heritage which always helps.

 

4/15/06- Lindsay Lohan/Pearl Jam

Avg. skit: **.55

 

While no one needed to see Lohan host again, at least it was a good episode. Pearl Jam was a really good musical guest, and there was another kickass SNL Digital Short. Nothing stood out aside from that, but there was a minimum of crap, which made it a good show.

 

5/6/06- Tom Hanks/Red Hot Chili Peppers

Avg. skit: **.85

 

You knew this show was going to be quality when the lineup was announced, and it delivered. Another great SNL Digital Short, an amazing performance by the Red Hot Chili Peppers and lots of funny material and funny performances from Tom Hanks.

 

5/13/06- Julia Louis-Dreyfus/Paul Simon/Al Gore

Avg. skit: ***.21

 

This was the best show of the season, and one of the best shows of the past few years. Very good skits from top to bottom, two amazing performances from Paul Simon and a show with a cast that seemed inspired to create a good show.

 

5/20/06- Kevin Spacey/Nelly Furtado/Timbaland

Avg. skit: **.45

 

A bit of a disappointment since Kevin Spacey was the host and Nelly was the musical guest, but it was better then last year’s finale. Unlike other shows, the show seemed to get better after Update, and it really saved the episode from being a potential disaster. Given the size of the cast (did you see that Falconer skit), hopefully SNL will chop some of the deadweight.

 

Best Skit from Each Episode-

 

Steve Carrell: Kanye West reunites with Mike Myers

Cast- Mike Myers, Lorne Michaels, Kanye West, Rudolph, Mitchell

Thoughts- First of all Maya did not get the pregnancy boobs that Courtney Cox got. And seriously, leave SNL if you that preggers. I mean, damn. This was very funny though. Kenan-Finesse mix-ups will always make me laugh. I thought the interaction between Myers and Kanye was hilarious. It’s always cool seeing Myers back, and I’m glad Kanye can actually laugh at himself and Myers was awesome as always. ****

 

Jon Heder: Retreat

Cast- Heder, Seth Meyers, Armisen, Poehler, Dratch, Sudeikis

Thoughts- I don’t mind Sudeikis being in all these skits, but boy is spelling his name quite annoying. A light night for Seth tonight, but I don’t mind it if it gives the other guys a chance for the same exposure to possibly breakout like he did in 2001. Seth was really funny here, and there were some good lines here. I mean come on, office yankstick! I didn’t like Rachel’s bit, but Amy was also great here as Irene. The “I’m Watching You” bit is always comedy gold. ***1/2

 

Catherine Zeta Jones: The Hot French Teacher

Cast- Zeta-Jones, Poehler, Dratch, Mitchell, Thompson, Meyers, Sanz, Samberg

Thoughts- Wow, the requisite Catherine Zeta-Jones is hot skit, and I actually found it to be really funny. Making Zeta-Jones a French teacher made the skit that much more awesomer, since you just hate anyone who immediately comes in and starts talking French. Finesse as the fire marshall was funny and I thought Seth was hilarious, even though I took Latin for three years and I don’t remember hearing the word Boo-Yah. I really liked Horatio ogling the teacher only to have Rachel be his wife, was a good payoff. Maybe I was happy the Canucks beat the Avs, but this skit just made me laugh. ***1/2

 

Lance Armstrong: O’Reilly Factor

Cast- Armstrong, Hammond, Armisen, Parnell

Thoughts- Poor Jeff Richards. This had to be a kick in the teeth for him. I mean, ouch. I do feel bad for the guy, because his O’Reilly Factor from the Elijah Wood dress rehearsal was some seriously funny stuff. I thought this was really good, but a bit flat in spots to prevent this from being truly awesome. Darrell got the voice down and I thought there were a lot of good lines here. Fred looked really funny as Charles Schumer. Like I said, a lot of good-great lines here and I love seeing them spoof O’Reilly but this just needed a bit more to push it over the top as a great skit. The mailbag letter about Bird Flu-Larry Bird was hilarious though. Fine-tune this skit a bit, cut out some dead spots, and this could definitely go ****+. Also, haven’t been able to watch O’Reilly Factor in a while, is his set and graphics really that ugly now? Jeff Richards was fired. Too funny. ***1/2

 

Jason Lee: Refurbishments

Cast- Lee, Armisen, Dratch, Parnell

Thoughts- You all know I had to love this one. As I explained in the Cork Soakers skit, cock is one of my favourite words in the English language, and thus any skit based around it, I will love. Again, I don’t know how they got this past the censors but God bless them for it. This was hilarious, and probably my favourite skit of the young season. Tons of great double entendres, and Parnell did his usual great Chris Parnell performance that he does in these skits. His pronunciation of cock sold this skit for me. Jason Lee was awesome as well, and I was laughing almost the whole time. It never lost steam and even had a good ending too. ****1/2

 

Eva Longoria: Smoke Alarm

Cast- Parnell, Armisen, Forte, Rachel Dratch, Sanz, Kenan Thompson, Finesse Mitchell, Jason Sudeikis

Thoughts- This was actually pretty funny. I liked Fred as the ultra serious fireman and this was a good concept. I have to say that I think I’d be more likely to get out of the house if I had some annoying 80s synthesizer music playing. The stuff with Fred telling people to get out of the house ASAP and Parnell talking about enjoying the music was good stuff. I also enjoyed the little bit with Finesse and Kenan at the end. ***1/4

 

Dane Cook: Cold Opening

Cast- The whole cast (Yes, I’m lazy)

Thoughts- I caught a bit of the holiday lighting thing. Rod Stewart was good, Pam from the Office actually looked hot, and the banter between Al Roker and Megan Mullally was painful. This was a really funny cold opening, and I loved the singing of Silent Night and Wiig mentioning airing My Name is Earl reruns. The other songs were funny too, even though nothing will top the first. Hammond as Trump was its usual hilarious self (especially the Chanukah mispronunciation) and helped put this over the top. ***3/4

 

Alec Baldwin: Face Transplant

Cast- Baldwin, Tina Fey, Seth Meyers, Chris Parnell, Armisen, Dratch, Kenan Thompson, Poehler

Thoughts- I wonder why they had Tina here instead of Kristen Wiig, but I’m glad they did since I think Fey’s delivery here worked much better then Wiig’s would’ve. Baldwin was his usual awesome self here, and this was a great premise for a skit. I really enjoyed Seth here, and the bit with Rachel. I know I hate on her a lot, but Tina was awesome here. The bit about Kenan (He raped me in Afghanistan, why did you become his business partner?) was easily the best part. Great skit here, Baldwin is the man. ****1/4

 

Jack Black: Lazy Sunday

Cast- Parnell, Samberg

Thoughts- Finally, a much hyped SNL skit that lives up to the hype. I’ve watched this a few times now, and it definitely holds up. Parnell’s always been a great rapper, and I’m glad they let him rap about something besides having outlandish adventures with the guest host. There were so many great lines here and Samberg was just awesome. I still think Hader is the better featured player, but maybe this is the breakout skit Samberg needed to establish himself and gain some momentum. How can you not like a skit that references The Notebook, Ghost, Google Maps, Alexander Hamilton, The Chronicles of Narnia and of course the famous Aaron Burr-Alexander Hamilton duel? The Chronic-What-cles of Narnia stuff was hilarious. This was funny, played to everyone’s strengths, didn’t go for too long and made reference to a famous duel in American history….what more can you ask for? ****3/4

 

Scarlett Johansson: My Sweet 16

Cast- Johansson, Parnell, Dratch, Poehler, Wiig

Thoughts- I never thought I’d hear a Hilary Duff song on SNL but SNL manages to surprise me. Even though it was her worst song off Metamorphosis, any Hilary is better then no Hilary. This was really awesome, and Johansson was hilarious. I loved the interplay between Johansson and Poehler, especially Amy’s comments to the camera. The Arch line was killer. The skit’s momentum died off a smidge at the actual party, but Johansson telling her parents to wait in the car and flipping off over getting the Go-Gos instead of Hilary and Haylie was funny stuff. Haylie Duff is horrible, but then again so is the Go-Go’s version of Our Lips Are Sealed, so her party was doomed to fail. Parnell was funny as always as the beleaguered dad. ****1/4

 

Peter Sarsgaard: Chuck Norris

Cast- Poehler, Armisen, Samberg, Sudekis

Thoughts- Man, SNL must’ve really loved those facts. Too bad they’re already getting old and the fad is over. Plus, Chuck Norris’ response to the whole thing was funnier then the facts themselves. That said, this was actually quite funny. The fact that Samberg looked nothing like Chuck Norris added to it. I loved him beating up those people in the fights or them showing his various poses. The skit took a bit too long to get going, but once it did I really enjoyed it. Pretentious songs rule! ***1/2

 

Steve Martin: Cold Opening

Cast- Kelly Ripa, Alec Baldwin, Lorne Michaels, Steve Martin, Will Forte, Samberg

Thoughts- Wow, Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin meeting up, that’s like ummm the two people who host MadTV a lot meeting up. The beginning with Martin and Ripa was funny stuff, especially the Viagra clock. Viagra is not a word according to Microsoft Word. Baldwin was great as always and Martin kicking Lorne in the face was a great payoff to all this. ****

 

Natalie Portman: Monologue

Cast- Natalie Portman, Chris Parnell, Andy Samberg, Jason Sudeikis, Finesse Mitchell, Kristin Wiig

Thoughts- Natalie shaved her head last summer, I would hope she’d have grown it out by now, since she didn’t look that great. Natalie countering the Stars Wars geeks, though done before on the Simpsons, was really funny. Could’ve done without Finesse’s bit, but Kristin’s exchange redeemed it. I never saw the middle of either trilogy, so I can’t verify if what Natalie said was correct. ***1/2

 

Matt Dillon: Variety Vault

Cast- Dillon, Darrell Hammond, Wiig, Hader

Thoughts- Good to see Bill get to reprise his Vincent Price role. And I also loved SNL paying respect to Don Knotts with the impression. Darrell did a good impression and it was a nice gesture. Wiig also did a very good Katherine Hepburn, although one wonders if she watched the Aviator for inspiration. My favourite part was probably the bagpipers playing when Price was reading his ghoulish poem. Ron Sterling and Price arguing over Burgess Meredith was also really funny. This was really good, and I would like to see Hader used a lot more on the show. ***3/4

 

Antonio Banderas: Foreigners

Cast- Banderas, Parnell, Poehler, Armisen, Sanz, Sudeikis

Thoughts- Horatio must’ve thanked God that Banderas was hosting, since it gave him a lot more airtime then he usually gets. I saw Mindy Kaling’s name in the credits, and since this seemed like an Office-esque skit, so I think she might have wrote it. Given the quality of Office’s that she’s written, having her write for SNL is nothing but a positive. This was really funny and a great way to cap off all the jokes about Antonio being Spanish. I actually didn’t know Fred was legit Spanish so I learned something as well. SNL’s attempts at racial humour are usually pretty funny, and I thought the bickering over Antonio being Spanish and not Mexican, and the guys talking about taking your jobs and sleeping with your wives was good stuff. This was one of the best skits of the night, yay hating on Mexicans. ***1/2

 

Tom Hanks: SNL Digital Short

Cast- Hanks, Armisen, Maya Rudolph, Poehler, Forte Chris Parnell, Thompson, Andy Samberg

Thoughts- The SNL Digital Short scores again. How can you not love Will’s Andrew Dice Clay getup, or just the whole video itself, especially when Tom Hanks said gay and the camera flashed straight. It went on a tad too long, but for the most part this was very funny loaded with great lines. ****1/4

 

Julia Louis-Dreyfus: MySpace

Cast- Louis-Dreyfus, Will Forte, Seth Meyers, Chris Parnell, Sanz, Finesse Mitchell, Bill Hader, Andy Samberg

Thoughts- According to Will Forte, Paul Simon rehearsed for this skit. This caused me to almost flip out and kill someone since Paul Simon playing a pedophile would’ve been the awesome. And it would finally answer what him and Julio were really doing down by the schoolyard. Even without the presence of Simon, this was hilarious. From the moustaches, to Will’s mock typing, to Seth’s Dateline question, to Bill’s exchange with Samberg, this had a lot of great lines and moments. Some stuff didn’t work like the Chad Michael Murray exchange and the ending. In fact I thought the ending was better in dress, where Julia asked Horatio out. Really did a good job of paying off her naivety. This was great, and all the guys gave really good performances. And it should be noted that according to MS Word, in Canadian English pedophile is spelled paedophile. ****

 

Kevin Spacey: Two A-Holes at the Crime Scene

Cast- Spacey, Chris Parnell, Jason Sudeikis, Kristin Wiig

Thoughts- Yes!!! The two A-holes return!! This was probably my favourite one yet. From the perp being described as a cross between Jesus and a rabbit, to the camera cutting back to Spacey’s facials, this had it all. Sudeikis continues to own with his Burt Reynolds-like voice and blank reactions to everything. Could’ve used a better ending but that’s a minor complaint to an excellent skit. ****1/4

 

Top Ten Skits of the Year (Not counting musical guests or Weekend Update)

 

1. Lazy Sunday from Jack Black (featuring Parnell, Samberg) ****3/4

2. Refurbishments from Jason Lee (featuring Lee, Armisen, Dratch, Parnell) ****1/2

3. Don’t Cut Off My Testicles from Tom Hanks (featuring Hanks, Armisen, Rudolph, Poehler, Forte, Parnell, Thompson, Samberg) ****1/4

4. Face Transplant from Alec Baldwin (featuring Baldwin, Fey, Meyers, Parnell, Armisen, Dratch, Thompson, Poehler) ****1/4

5. Two A-Holes at a Crime Scene from Kevin Spacey (featuring Spacey, Sudeikis, Wiig, Parnell) ****1/4

6. My Sweet 16 from Scarlett Johansson (featuring Johansson, Parnell, Dratch, Poehler, Wiig) ****1/4

7. A Message from the Veep from Jack Black (featuring Hammond, Dratch, Forte, Samberg) ****

8. Kanye West reunites with Mike Myers from Steve Carrell (featuring Kanye West, Mike Myers, Lorne, Rudolph, Mitchell) ****

9. My Space from Julia Louis-Dreyfus (featuring Louis-Dreyfus, Forte, Meyers, Parnell, Sanz, Mitchell, Hader, Samberg) ****

10. SNL Digital Short from Lindsay Lohan (featuring Michaels, Lohan, Armisen, Dratch, Hader, Andy Samberg) ****

 

By cast:

 

Armisen: 4

Dratch: 5

Fey: 1

Forte: 2

Hammond: 1

Meyers: 2

Mitchell: 2

Parnell: 6

Poehler: 3

Rudolph: 2

Sanz: 1

Thompson: 2

Hader: 2

Samberg: 4

Sudeikis: 1

Wiig: 2

 

And now…..THE TOP 5!!!!

 

Top 5 Weekend Updates:

 

1. Scarlett Johansson **3/4

2. Alec Baldwin **3/4

3. Kevin Spacey **3/4

4. Lindsay Lohan **1/2

5. Antonio Banderas **1/2

 

The Top 5 Musical Guest Performances:

 

1. Paul Simon “Outrageous” ****1/2

2. Paul Simon “How Can You Live in the Northeast” ****1/4

3. Red Hot Chili Peppers “Give it Away” ****1/4

4. Korn “Freak on a Leash” ***3/4

5. Franz Ferdinand “Take Me Out” ***3/4

 

Top 5 Monologues

 

1. Alec Baldwin ****1/4

2. Steve Martin ***1/2

3. Tom Hanks ***1/2

4. Matt Dillon ***1/2

5. Natalie Portman ***1/2

 

Top 5 Cold Openings-

 

1. A Holiday Message from the Veep from Jack Black ****

2. SNL Digital Short from Steve Martin ****

3. Bush Q-n-A from Steve Carrell ****

4. Frist and Bush from Tom Hanks ***3/4

5. Lighting the Tree from Dane Cook ***3/4

 

Top 5 Last Skits

 

1. Glengarry Glen Ross from Alec Baldwin ***3/4

2. Neil Young is Subtle from Kevin Spacey ***3/4

3. Wine from Antonio Banderas **1/2

4. Unicorns from Matt Dillon **1/4

5. Black Eyed Peas from Jon Heder **

 

Top 5 Weekend Update Commentaries-

 

1. Jason Sudeikis as the idiot football coach

2. Will Forte sings about the differences between Sunnis, Shiites and Kurds

3. Darrell Hammond as Dan Rather

4. Kenan as Michael Irvin

5. Will Forte as Tim Calhoun

 

Ranking the shows-

 

1. Julia Louis-Dreyfus/Paul Simon ***.21

2. Tom Hanks/Red Hot Chili Peppers **.85

3. Jack Black/Neil Young **.82

4. Steve Martin/Prince **.77

5. Alec Baldwin/Shakira **.62

6. Lindsay Lohan/Pearl Jam **.55

7. Steve Carrell/Kanye West **.54

8. Antonio Banderas/Mary J. Blige **.52

9. Scarlett Johansson/Death Cab for Cutie **.51

10. Jason Lee/Foo Fighters **.5

11. Kevin Spacey/Nelly Furtado **.45

12. Eva Longoria/Korn **.43

13. Natalie Portman/Fall Out Boy **.38

14. Catherine Zeta Jones/Franz Ferdinand **.33

15. Matt Dillon/Arctic Monkeys **.27

16. Dane Cook/James Blunt **.2

17. Jon Heder/Ashlee Simpson **.2

18. Lance Armstrong/Sheryl Crow **.13

19. Peter Sarsgaard/The Strokes *.97

 

And now it’s time for…..the bottom 5!!!

 

Bottom 5 Weekend Updates-

 

5. Catherine Zeta Jones **

4. Jack Black **

3. Eva Longoria **

2. Peter Sarsgaard **

1. Steve Carrell *

 

Bottom 5 Musical Guest Performances-

 

5. Nelly Furtado w/ Timbaland “Promiscuous Girl” *1/2

4. Shakira “Don’t Bother” *1/2

3. Ashlee Simpson “I Didn’t Steal Your Boyfriend” *

2. Nelly Furtado “Maneater” *

1. Ashlee Simpson “Catch Me if I Fall” ¾*

 

Bottom 5 Monologues-

 

5. Peter Sarsgaard **1/4

4. Eva Longoria **

3. Steve Carrell *1/2

2. Antonio Banderas *1/2

1. Catherine Zeta Jones *

 

Bottom 5 Cold Openings-

 

5. Wolf Blitzer Presents from Lindsay Lohan **3/4

4. Anderson Cooper 360 from Kevin Spacey **3/4

3. Cheney and Bush on Meirs from Jon Heder **1/2

2. A Message from Cheney from Lance Armstrong **1/4

1. Spring Break from Matt Dillon **

 

Bottom 5 Last Skits-

 

5. American Tazer from Jason Lee *1/2

4. Gangsters at the Dock from Lance Armstrong *1/2

3. Schoenwald Studios from Catherine Zeta Jones ¾*

2. Debbie Downer from Steve Carrell ¼*

1. Not Bill Brasky from Scarlett Johansson DUD

 

Bottom 5 Weekend Update commentaries-

 

5. Scott Podsednik talks about winning the World Series

4. Fred as Steve Jobs introducing the smaller I-Pods

3. Kenan and his puppet

2. Andy Samberg and his shaggy hair corner

1. Drew Barrymore’s saggy tits

 

Rating the cast-

 

Fred Armisen- Fred was his usual solid self this season. We only got one Ferecito and far too many Nunes but he did very well in small roles and had good impressions. He was in three of the top five skits of the season, which counts for something. While Fred will never be a breakout star or leader of the cast, you can always count on him for a laugh. ***1/4 Last year: ***1/2

 

Rachel Dratch- Everyone says she is leaving, so yea. I never liked Rachel. She once again had to torture us with more Debbie Downers and more lame commentaries on Weekend Update. Good luck on 30 Rock Rachel! * Last year: *

 

Tina Fey- Weekend Update with Amy didn’t get much better, and I still don’t get why she came back after having April. Update this year oftentimes tried to resemble the Daily Show and it failed miserably. The chemistry between Tina and Amy didn’t improve and they still had lame girly bits. I’m glad 30 Rock got picked up, so Tina can finally move on and Weekend Update can get watchable again. * Last year: *1/4

 

Will Forte- Will had an excellent year. He continued to shine in his bizarre Will Forte skits and was often the centrepiece of the very funny SNL Digital Shorts. His President Bush impression continued to shine and he was often at the heart of very funny cold openings. He stood out on Weekend Update, taking two of the five top commentary slots, when he easily could’ve swept the list. Rarely does Forte have an off night or off bit and he was one of SNL’s biggest reasons for its improvement this season. Plus, he plays a great paedophile. **** Last year: ***3/4

 

Darrell Hammond- Darrell, the guy who stays on SNL because it pays well. He said it, not me. He doesn’t really do much anymore. A couple of impressions, some hilarious, some played out and you feel bad for him when he has to do a skit after Update since you know he wants to get home. I don’t get why they don’t just fire him, especially after it seems like they retired Hardball. ** Last year: ***

 

Seth Meyers- It’s hard to know how much of an impact Seth has had this season. He was named head writer, and his airtime started to decrease a lot. We don’t really know what Seth was writing or helping to write, but this was a better season then last, so he deserves some credit. The Needlers is always good, though played and he had some other good bits throughout the year. I don’t think Anderson Cooper is really clicking as the new Hardball though. So this rating is a lot lower then last year’s but it’s not indicative of Seth’s comedy at all. *** Last year: ****1/4

 

Finesse Mitchell- Finesse just doesn’t fit in with the show. He can be good on Update, but aside from Stahkisha, he doesn’t do anything. As I said last year, I’m sure they can find another black guy who can create characters and be funny in skits. Finesse has had three years and has yet to show anything. ** Last year: **

 

Chris Parnell- When did Chris Parnell become awesome? The thing is, he already was awesome, but I always underappreciated his talent just like everyone else did. Lorne fired him, NBC cast him on Think and Thin and I’ve been giving him lower star ratings then he should have. Even as a straight man or background character he garnered laughs, and without him, Lazy Sunday wouldn’t have been the classic that it was. Parnell deserves a lot better then he gets, and I hope he finally gets the break he deserves. **** Last year: **

 

Amy Poehler- Update still sucked, and she still did Caitlin, but outside of that, she performed well in other roles. With Tina and Maya out, Amy was forced to be THE female, and I think she did a very good job. At times she was overexposed, but that’s the nature of the beast. With Tina gone, I’d like for Amy to leave the desk as well, so let’s hope Lorne loses his hard-on for having a) women on Update and b) co-anchors. ** Last year: *1/2

 

Maya Rudolph- She was gone till February, came back, and then went away, and then came back again. She was in 6 episodes, and sucked in all of them. DUD Last year: ¼*

 

Horatio Sanz- Horatio introduced us to Carol this season. He should be shot. DUD Last year: ¾*

 

Kenan Thompson- Kenan continues to impress and blow Finesse out of the water in terms of the better black castmember. He was often a highlight on Weekend Update and shined with his impressions and his bits. At times, like Parnell, I think he is also underappreciated, as evidenced by the tepid response to skits like Colin and Son. Kenan had a very good first year as a cast member, and I look forward to seeing what he has to offer next year. ***1/2 Last year: ***1/2

 

Bill Hader- Bill became a fan favourite with his impressions on Update in his very first show. While Bill didn’t get as much airtime as he should’ve, when he was given the ball, he ran with it. His diminished airtime made me worry a bit that he might get Riggled, but let’s hope Lorne’s not stupid. I think he has the potential to shine as an impressionist and do well in bizarre skits like Forte. ***

 

Andy Samberg- Andy got lucky with the digital shorts, but it’s hard to know how much was him, and how much was the Lonely Island guys. Outside of the digital shorts, he never impressed me. He seemed out of place in skits, often relegated to a Cop #2 role. He was terrible on Update. We know Samberg’s not getting Riggled because of that one skit, but I hope next season he shows he has more up his sleeve. **

 

Jason Sudeikis- Sudeikis was added as a featured player in the Johnny Knoxville episode and his only significance was probably making Rob Riggle think, “Oh shit.” With Seth off to write, someone had to take over as the male lead, and it was Sudeikis. He did a great job. He played smarmy and played straight and did them both very well. Two A-Holes is fast becoming one of my favourite characters, and with his ability to get a laugh at anything, Sudeikis is soon becoming one of my favourite performers. ***3/4

 

Kristin Wiig- Her first recurring character was the Target women, and it sucked. Aside from Two A-Holes, Wiig hasn’t done much to impress me. She has a lot of voices and is versatile, but she’s yet to truly be funny. I think Wiig needs a whole season to truly be judged but for now she gets **.

 

Sports Report-

 

Braves- The Braves always get off to an eh start early in the season, but it looks like they have broken out of it. They’re only four back of the Mets, so I’m confident come the season premiere, I’ll be talking about another division title.

 

Mailbag!!!!!!!!!!!!-

 

Hey Bob- What’s up? I have a quick question regarding the new Amanda Bynes movie She’s The Man that came out back this past March. I saw the previews, and there’s this one critic who commented that She’s The Man is “like Mean Girls with a twist.” Now, are there any tinges of Mean Girls-type humor in She’s The Man? I mean, what’s so Mean Girls-ishly funny about Amanda Bynes parading around as a guy? I’m assuming that you saw the movie already, since you’re a big Amanda Bynes mark. I didn’t get to see the movie when it came out because I was busy. So are there any correlations between Mean Girls and She’s The Man? Thanks for answering all my questions this year, Bob. Have a nice summer! Later, Ken

 

It’s not like Mean Girls at all. I mean, yes there are girls who are mean, but the parallels end there. The reason Mean Girls was used as a comparison is because it is now the benchmark of teen movies. I’m sure if Get Over It had received the respect and acclaim that it deserved, She’s the Man would be called “Get Over It with a twist.” Funny, since comparing it to Get Over It makes a lot more sense since both movies deal with Shakespeare. She’s the Man is a fine teen comedy with a good performance from Bynes but the last 20 minutes are brutal. I don’t mind a few plot holes, but the last 20 minutes of She’s the Man are like Flight Plan on acid.

 

Wanna be in the mailbag???? Email me at [email protected]

 

The review is in the next post.

[bob_barron 0]

And now the review…

 

Cold Opening

Cast- Seth Meyers, Kenan Thompson, Darrell Hammond, Rachel Dratch

Thoughts- Yea, Anderson 360 just isn’t clicking in the cold opening slot. Kenan as the National Guard soldier happy to be in Mexico could’ve been written better as I believe there are better comedic avenues to take then the one they took. Darrell as Ahnuld was its usual subpar self, just like it was when he was running for governor. The highlight was Rachel Dratch in her last cold opening. I thought she was hilarious as the disgruntled New Hampshire resident and I was glad she got to go out on a high note. **1/2

 

Monologue

Cast- Kevin Spacey

Thoughts- I think once Spacey accepts the fact that he is not and never will be Bobby Darin, he’ll be able to sleep easier at night. I also think once he fires whoever’s been sending him scripts since American Beauty, he’ll also be able to sleep easier at night. And of course, there’s the whole closet homo thing as well. But besides that, this was a fun monologue Spacey did goof though, as when he hosted in 1997, he had already won his Oscar for Usual Suspects. Also, Spacey mentioned more people voting for American Idol then they do the president, which was totally stolen from American Dreamz. Not that anyone saw American Dreamz, but the point remains the same. Anyway, this went on for a bit too long, but I enjoyed Spacey’s energy and this was pretty funny. ***

 

Two A-Holes at the Crime Scene

Cast- Spacey, Chris Parnell, Jason Sudeikis, Kristin Wiig

Thoughts- Yes!!! The two A-holes return!! This was probably my favourite one yet. From the perp being described as a cross between Jesus and a rabbit, to the camera cutting back to Spacey’s facials, this had it all. Sudeikis continues to own with his Burt Reynolds-like voice and blank reactions to everything. Could’ve used a better ending but that’s a minor complaint to an excellent skit. ****1/4

 

Oprah’s Legends Ball

Cast- Maya Rudolph, Kenan Thompson, Finesse Mitchell, Hammond, Meyers, Amy Poehler

Thoughts- Damn you President Bush! Oprah’s Legends Ball was supposed to air last week but b/c Bush had to talk at 8 and ABC wanted to make sure Grey’s Anatomy ran from 9-11, so Oprah got the cut to air next week, and thus we got this crappy skit. I laughed at Kenan in drag and a little at Oprah dissing Maya Angelou for John Travolta but the rest of this skit was deadweight. Seth obviously came from the Ben Stiller School of Tom Cruise Impressions, even though Stiller’s is actually funny. *1/2

 

Carol

Cast- Spacey, Horatio Sanz, Poehler, Sudeikis

Thoughts- It’s the season finale, which means no new episodes until October. It’s Kevin Spacey, who hosted the best SNL ever. And in dress, Bill did his Vincent Price impression. And there’s no hockey game for me to flip to.

 

So SNL gives us a Carol. Excellent. DUD

 

TV Funhouse

Thoughts- Dear Robert Smigel,

You’re really funny. No seriously, you’re really really funny. No one is better at offending the viewer or playing beat the censor then you are. So stop doing Fun with Real Audio. It’s never funny and it just seems like you’re half-assing it. And it’s the finale, go for it with something huge! You have four months to find a new way to offend us. Basically, what I’m trying to say is that Fun with Real Audio fucking sucks. So stop doing it! Thanks! *1/2

 

Andy is Keyser Soze

Cast- Spacey, Andy Samberg

Thoughts- I’ve never seen the Usual Suspects, but I got the joke and what they were going for. I would’ve laughed harder if they had done a Glengarry Glen Ross parody. Before you say, “Hey now, they did a Glengarry Glen Ross parody,”, well, you can never have too many Glengarry Glen Ross parodies. I probably would’ve laughed harder had I seen the Usual Suspects, but I still thought this was pretty good. ***

 

Nelly Furtado ft. Timbaland “When Did I Start to Suck?”

Thoughts- Oh, I’m sorry, the song is called Promiscuous Girl but either way it’s really sad to see her go the Jewel route. At least Jewel had nicer breasts. But yea, this was just not very good. Two years ago they got J-Kwon, this year they get Nelly Furtado. They really don’t try very hard when they book for the finale do they? *1/2

 

Weekend Update

Cast- Tina Fey (tear), Poehler, Rudolph, Mitchell, Fred Armisen, Sanz, Dratch, Sudeikis

Thoughts- Wow. So this was Tina’s last Update. It is kind of sad. I mean, sure the last two years were pretty brutal, but knowing we will never hear of another euphemism for the female vagina is slightly depressing. And the awfulness of the last 37 Updates, should not take away the greatness of the first 82. For better or worse, she changed Update and for a long time it was for better. From the Enron rant, to the Britney Spears’ rants, to the David Arquette joke, to time travelling vagina, to cooter poked, to Queaf Goldberg, to the tons of ****+ Updates she delivered, Tina was really good. I do wish she had left when Jimmy left, but it doesn’t take away from the greatness of the Hefner rant, her getting punched in the face a bunch of times by Jimmy, or of course, the time she said, “I’m wearing these leg warmers?” And of course there was her million hairstyles, the Oh Snap bits, the Update door, the Tina High Alert rant, All homos over 14 will be given a bat, I am dumber then a French whore, the WU inside joke, the baby cliff-hanger, The Weekend Update Pizza Party against terrorism, the Pee-Wee rant, the Update Secret Joke, Savannah Dakota Fey, shut up and eat the shrimp, the metal detector, Jimmy and Tina yelling at America, the eating out joke and the million other things she did at the Desk that made me laugh. And I’m still in therapy over her singing to Guliani, but I’m getting there.

 

Oh, Update gets **3/4. Thanks Tina, we’ll miss you! And I’ll miss my hugs. **3/4

 

The Falconer

Cast- Spacey, Forte, Rudolph, Parnell, Meyers, Armisen, Hammond, Dratch, Thompson, Sanz, Mitchell, Poehler, Hader, Samberg, Sudeikis, Wiig

Thoughts- Jesus, this is a big cast. I have to say, even though I usually loathe the Falconer, I thought this pretty funny. It was so out there and WTF that you had to like it. This would actually be good send-off for the Falconer. It was cool seeing the whole cast involved in a skit and the ending with Maya as the hunter was well played. ***

 

SNL Digital Short

Cast- Samberg

Thoughts- This remind me of Jay-, oh there was another less obvious example I was going for. This reminded me of that time Ferecito did Ferecito Walking, that was hilarious. This was funny too, especially Andy’s dence joke. Andy also had some funny facial expressions to go along with it. ***1/4

 

Legends of History

Cast- Spacey, Hammond, Armisen, Parnell, Meyers, Hader

Thoughts- This reminded me of the sarcasm class skit from the Matthew Perry episode, because well, both skits dealt with sarcasm. Some really good lines from Spacey and Fred and Bill did a good job of playing dense to sarcasm. Thought the ending was a bit weak, but the part about Stonehenge was pretty clever. ***3/4

 

Nelly Furtado “Maneater?”

Thoughts- Seriously Nelly. What the hell? I liked your old stuff. And come on, no matter what you sing Much Music will still play your songs a lot and treat you as a big deal. So for the next album, can we go back to not sucking? That’d be great. Man, Smigel and Furtado both disappoint tonight. Next thing you’ll tell me is that an episode hosted by Kevin Spacey would disappoint. Oh wait….*1/2

 

 

Neil Young Isn’t Very Subtle

Cast- Spacey, Poehler, Rudolph, Dratch, Samberg

Thoughts- I love Neil Young, and I thought this was really funny, and a very good way to close out the season. At least they closed out with a real skit, unlike last year, which closed out with that creepy skit with Lohan and a Bear City. The songs and lyrics were pretty funny and Spacey did a good impression. I was actually disappointed that Spacey didn’t get to do more impressions because he’s great at them. This was pretty funny and I’m glad 05-06 closed on a high note. ***3/4

 

The Bottom Line- The avg. skit was **.45 making this just barely a thumbs up show. I tried to not expect an episode like the last one Spacey hosted, but this was still disappointing. Of course if I had known how bad Nelly Furtado was going to be, I probably would’ve curbed my expectations a bit. This was a solid episode, but it seems like they saved most of their good material for after Update, which is a bit of a change a pace. SNL ended the season with five good shows, hopefully they can keep the momentum going into next fall.

 

Thumbs Up.

 

See y’all next fall!

[Mole 0]

Has any show been ****+ stars?

[bob_barron 0]

Kevin Spacey's first show had an average skit of ****+.

[strummer 0]

Andy Samberg- Andy got lucky with the digital shorts, but it’s hard to know how much was him, and how much was the Lonely Island guys. Outside of the digital shorts, he never impressed me. He seemed out of place in skits, often relegated to a Cop #2 role. He was terrible on Update. We know Samberg’s not getting Riggled because of that one skit, but I hope next season he shows he has more up his sleeve. **

 

A lot of people have compared Andy to Fallon, but to me he could be the next Sandler. Like Sandler, Andy really can't act at all. On the flip side he has tremendous stage presence, has a star quality and is loaded with charisma, just like Sandler. I thought for sure after Lazy Sunday he was going to be pushed hard as the next big star, but it died down after the Olympics hiatus. It's going to be interesting where his career goes.

[MDH257 0]

I didn't realize that Nelly Fertado's musical ambition was to become Fergie. During the first song I was waiting for "I wonder if I take you home, would you still be in love baby?"

[Black Lushus 0]

I happened to be "lucky enough" to see Nelly F.'s new video premiere on MTV and I thought to myself there's no way this is the same girl that sang that "I'm like a bird" song.

[Edwin MacPhisto 0]

"Promiscuous" (or "Promiscuous Girl," depending on who's sourcing it) is great. You guys are fuddyduddies.

[Aero 0]

During the Spacey episode, as soon as I saw him and the other two sitting at a restaurant, I cringed knowing a Carol skit was coming. Good episode otherwise, and yeah, the two A-holes skits are great.

[Black Lushus 0]

"Promiscuous" (or "Promiscuous Girl," depending on who's sourcing it) is great. You guys are fuddyduddies.

 

it's not as much that the song is bad as it is "holy hell, is this the same chick?"

[AndrewTS 0]

Dear Robert Smigel,

You’re really funny. No seriously, you’re really really funny. No one is better at offending the viewer or playing beat the censor then you are. So stop doing Fun with Real Audio. It’s never funny and it just seems like you’re half-assing it. And it’s the finale, go for it with something huge! You have four months to find a new way to offend us. Basically, what I’m trying to say is that Fun with Real Audio fucking sucks. So stop doing it! Thanks!

 

Agreed.

 

The Smigel special only cemented this further.

[starvenger 0]

"Promiscuous" (or "Promiscuous Girl," depending on who's sourcing it) is great. You guys are fuddyduddies.

 

it's not as much that the song is bad as it is "holy hell, is this the same chick?"

I think she's always been a bit hippy, but yeah she's a bit wider now. Doesn't help that she's about 5'.

 

Frankly, the new sound isn't that surprising. Her second album got zero airplay in the U.S. (but did well internationally, I think), so a change was in order. She'd done some work with Timbaland before, and rap isn't exactly new to her - she did some in a remixed version of "Get Ur Freak On" - so the somewhere-between-Gwen-Stefani=and-Jewel sound doesn't particularly shock me.

 

As for the show, I only caught WU-onward. I agree about the Falconer - there was so much of a "WTF" aspect to the skit that it managed to overcome the usual level of sucking. Plus the sight of Kenan and Rachel as "identical" Falconers was hilarious.

[Ripper 0]

I have to once again mention my mission in life to fuck either Nelly Furtado or Mya. Furtado is top of the list because Mya fucked Game, and seriously...ugh.

 

 

Thats all I have to add to this thread.

[ZGangsta 0]

"Promiscuous" (or "Promiscuous Girl," depending on who's sourcing it) is great. You guys are fuddyduddies.

I agree, I really dig that song. And normally I hate that type of dance/R&B pop.

 

But whatever, I can't hate on Nelly Furtado since I grew up a few blocks from her.

[FroGG_NeaL 0]

I have to once again mention my mission in life to fuck either Nelly Furtado or Mya. Furtado is top of the list because Mya fucked Game, and seriously...ugh.

 

 

Thats all I have to add to this thread.

 

 

And 50.

 

And is rumored a bunch of others, bitch sounds like a skandolous hoe.

 

But she's one my dream girls too, homey. That bitch is bad as hell.