NFL Week Four

[Guest Tzar Lysergic]

1:00 Games

ATL @ CAR

CLE @ CIN

HOU @ JAC

DEN @ KC

SF @ NO

ARI @ NYJ

GB @ TB

MIN @ TEN

4:00 Games

SD @ OAK

BUF @ STL

WAS @ DAL

Night game

PHI @ CHI

 

MNF

BAL @ PIT 8:30 PM

 

[Guest Tzar Lysergic]

Magic Five-

 

1. Regardless of who wins the game, who is the worst team in Ohio and why?

2. Can Houston get anything going this season with the rest of their division riddled with injuries?

3. Based on their play so far, do you think Atlanta will be dangerous this year?

4. Baltimore is 2-0 against teams with a combined 0-6 record. Will the Pittsburgh offense wake up and put the crapass Ravens in their place?

5. How will the coaching situation in Oakland affect their chances this week at home against the divisional favorite Chargers?

[Kinetic 0]

1. The Bengals. The team is completely dysfunctional, they have no defense, their offensive line can neither run block nor pass protect, their best receiver has the improbable last name of "Ocho Cinco," etc. The Browns, like the Ohio State Buckeyes, just have no heart right now.

 

2. Maybe. It looks like the Matt Schaub thing might not be working out. They'll probably equal last year's finish and land somewhere in the .500 area. The offensive line still seems to be a concern.

 

3. No. Atlanta has beaten Detroit and Kansas City. All they've proven is that they're not the worst team in the league.

 

4. Probably not. Pittsburgh's big weakness is the o-line, which plays right into Baltimore's strengths. If Baltimore can get anything going on offense or force a lot of points off of turnovers, that's a totally winnable game for them. Worst division in the league right there.

 

5. They didn't have a chance to begin with.

[Kinetic 0]

No Bucs-Packers here because of the goddamn Falcons. If the Tampa area wasn't such a tropical scuzzbucket hellhole full of scumbags, I'd move there just to avoid this bullshit.

[CanadianChris 0]

Magic Five-

 

1. Regardless of who wins the game, who is the worst team in Ohio and why?

2. Can Houston get anything going this season with the rest of their division riddled with injuries?

3. Based on their play so far, do you think Atlanta will be dangerous this year?

4. Baltimore is 2-0 against teams with a combined 0-6 record. Will the Pittsburgh offense wake up and put the crapass Ravens in their place?

5. How will the coaching situation in Oakland affect their chances this week at home against the divisional favorite Chargers?

1. This has to be Cincinnati. They have an overrated QB, bad lines, and a whole bunch of complete head cases. Plus, Marvin Lewis has quite obviously lost the team and needs to be fired.

 

2. Probably not. The Texans still seem to be saddled with a culture of losing, and as a result, they lose games they have chances to win. Matt Schaub is also not the QB everyone thought he was.

 

3. Nope. They're better than most people (including myself) thought, and they've shown they can beat horrible teams, but I don't think they have what it takes to beat anyone half decent. They'll probably end up 6-10 or 5-11.

 

4. Honestly, I think the answer here is no, particularly if Roethlisberger's injury affects his play or keeps him out. Ron Jaworski pointed this out on PTI yesterday -- the Ravens play the same defensive scheme as the Eagles, who got nine sacks Sunday. The last two games have shown that the Steelers' week 1 showing may have been a mirage. I don't think either team scores 20 points, at least not on offence, and I think the Ravens have a good shot at an upset here.

 

5. Not a bit. They'll get waxed regardless.

[Perfxion 0]

Magic Five-

 

1. Regardless of who wins the game, who is the worst team in Ohio and why?

 

CIN is worst simply because they are in no way a unit. CLE at least has a chance to turn around and maybe could become a better team.

 

2. Can Houston get anything going this season with the rest of their division riddled with injuries?

 

They suck. They have a crappy QB. They have a crappy coach. Every player seems not motivated to improve. Plus Ike is the nail in the coffin for this season. 2 and 14 if they are lucky.

 

3. Based on their play so far, do you think Atlanta will be dangerous this year?

They might win the south, but that doesn't mean much since they will be one and done like Tampa Bay did last year.

 

4. Baltimore is 2-0 against teams with a combined 0-6 record. Will the Pittsburgh offense wake up and put the crapass Ravens in their place?

 

PIT beats the shit out of Ravens.

 

5. How will the coaching situation in Oakland affect their chances this week at home against the divisional favorite Chargers?

 

Chargers get an easy win like they did Monday against the Jets.

 

1:00 Games

ATL @ CAR: ATL by 6

CLE @ CIN: CLE by 7

HOU @ JAC: JAC by 17

DEN @ KC: DEN by 9

SF @ NO: NO by 14

ARI @ NYJ: JETS by 3

GB @ TB: GB by 6

MIN @ TEN: TEN by 10

 

4:00 Games

SD @ OAK: SD by 21.

BUF @ STL: 30

WAS @ DAL: DAL by 7

 

Night game

PHI @ CHI: coinflip game of the week: PHI by 7

 

MNF

BAL @ PIT: PIT by 15

[Kinetic 0]

3. Based on their play so far, do you think Atlanta will be dangerous this year?

They might win the south, but that doesn't mean much since they will be one and done like Tampa Bay did last year.

 

Although that has been the pattern in the brief history of the NFC South, it's presumptuous to say that the Bucs will be one-and-done. They're currently in a three-way tie for 1st place in the division, with one of their two wins coming over that Atlanta juggernaut.

[MFer 0]

1. Regardless of who wins the game, who is the worst team in Ohio and why? (Cincy. Their biggest strength, which was the passing game, has turned into crap. They've just been dysfunctional all around. Cincy did show some life against the Giants, but I think the Browns are more talented, plus they might get a spark if and when Quinn finally comes in)

 

2. Can Houston get anything going this season with the rest of their division riddled with injuries? (Probably not. Tennessee is looking a lot better than I thought they'd be and I think Indy and Jacksonville will be there in the end despite their slow starts. I won't go MX and say 2-14, but Houston's gonna have a hard time making it to .500 again)

 

3. Based on their play so far, do you think Atlanta will be dangerous this year? (No. Once they start facing real teams, they'll come back down to earth. At best they get 4-5 more wins, which is miles better than anyone would've thought, but still not good enough to contend for the division)

 

4. Baltimore is 2-0 against teams with a combined 0-6 record. Will the Pittsburgh offense wake up and put the crapass Ravens in their place? (No. Pitt's O-line is alarmingly bad right now. The Ravens aren't that good, but their D is still very capable of causing some problems for the Steelers

 

5. How will the coaching situation in Oakland affect their chances this week at home against the divisional favorite Chargers? (It won't matter much. Maybe the Raiders will come out inspired and make it a closer game, but I don't expect them to win)

[cabbageboy 0]

I'll separate this into two posts, one with predictions and one answering the questions.

 

1:00 Games

ATL @ CAR: I have a feeling ATL will be a decent home team but when they go on the road the youth will start showing more with Ryan. Carolina by 10.

CLE @ CIN: Well, someone is going to have to win. The Bengals actually were quite good against the Giants, so I'll take them by 7.

HOU @ JAC: Houston always plays the Jags tough and they really need the win here. That said, I can't see JAX following that Indy win by losing at home. Jags by 6.

DEN @ KC: You want assrape? This is one right here. Broncos by 17.

SF @ NO: I don't buy the Niners as being anything decent yet. Saints also need a win badly after two tough road losses. New Orleans by 12.

ARI @ NYJ: This is a perplexing game. I don't really like what I'm seeing from the Jets right now, so I'll take the Cardinals to pull off a road win 24-21.

GB @ TB: The Bucs are a pretty solid team actually and I think they can hold serve at home here in a tough game. Tampa 28-24.

MIN @ TEN: This will be an ultra physical game. Can't see either team scoring very much in it, but Tennessee has the better D so I'll take them 16-10.

 

4:00 Games

SD @ OAK: Chargers look back on track and with Oakland's bizarre coaching situation I can't see this going well for the Raiders. SD by 14.

BUF @ STL: The Rams may well have a shot at 0-16. Bills by 17.

WAS @ DAL: A little surprising that the line on this one is 11 or so. I think the Redskins keep it a bit closer than that. Dallas by 7.

Night game

PHI @ CHI: Bears have lost two really tough games thus far, but with the Eagles perhaps a little banged up I'll take Chicago to win this one by 3.

 

MNF

BAL @ PIT 8:30 PM: I don't know exactly how good the Ravens really are, yet Roethisberger might be injured. Still, I'll take the Steelers by 4 in a manly game.

 

[cabbageboy 0]

And now the questions:

 

1. Regardless of who wins the game, who is the worst team in Ohio and why? I'll go with the Browns as being the worst. The Bengals aren't really that horrible, losing by 7 to the Ravens and in OT to the Giants.

2. Can Houston get anything going this season with the rest of their division riddled with injuries? Eh, anything is possible I suppose but Houston thus far has been disappointing. They are almost in a must win situation this week vs. JAX, but I don't see it.

3. Based on their play so far, do you think Atlanta will be dangerous this year? The Falcons may be a textbook example of a tough team at home that sucks on the road. That said, I do love the Turner signing and Ryan will eventually figure this out.

4. Baltimore is 2-0 against teams with a combined 0-6 record. Will the Pittsburgh offense wake up and put the crapass Ravens in their place? I don't know if the Steelers will wreck the Ravens but I do see them getting a tough win.

5. How will the coaching situation in Oakland affect their chances this week at home against the divisional favorite Chargers? I think the Chargers are going to beat them down.

 

[JaMarcus Russell's #1 Caucasian Fan 0]

1:00 Games

ATL @ CAR -I like the Panthers to bounce back from the Minnesota game. ATL isn't good enough to win early divisional games yet.

CLE @ CIN- Battle of the 0-3 Teams. Both teams can't play defense. I'll chosse Cleveland is this one

HOU @ JAC - I like Jacksonville to get back to .500

DEN @ KC - Denver should pour it on here by a lot.

SF @ NO- NO has been a dissapointment. SF has surprised me on both side of the ball. I can see them winning here.

ARI @ NYJ - The Cardinals aren't as good as I thought, I like the Jets to bounce back here.

GB @ TB- Another tossup. I like Green Bay more than I like Tampa. Although I'm weary a bit of the Packer's secondary.

MIN @ TEN- I can't decide, but Tennessee has proven to be a player in the AFC this year. This should be close

4:00 Games

SD @ OAK - LT has made a career of running over the Raiders, and would love to take Lane Kiffin out of his misery. SD, and its not going to be pretty.

BUF @ STL- Buffalo is not losing to the worst team in football.

WAS @ DAL- Washington has bounced back nicely from week one, but the Cowboys are the real deal. I like them at home.

Night game

PHI @ CHI- Philly should have no problem with Chicago here.

 

MNF

BAL @ PIT 8:30 PM- Another defensive struggle here. Its going be close, but I can't trust Flacco here just yet.

[Kinetic 0]

So Trent Green is the new starting QB in St. Louis. I guess this is the lesser of the two Missouri teams? I don't know. Stiff competition.

[Cheech Tremendous 0]

Trent Green is still in the league?

 

There are so many awful teams this year. Detroit, Kansas City, Cincinnati, Cleveland, St. Louis...

 

EDIT: So when I read that Green was starting earlier, I was kind of like "oh, I didn't even know that Bulger was hurt." Then I read he's not actually hurt. Linehan actually wants to start Green. What the hell? Wasn't it like a decade ago that the Rams moved on from the Trent Green era? He's really the guy that you want to hang your franchise's future on?

 

Hopefully he doesn't get concussed walking onto the field.

[Kinetic 0]

Right, they're one inevitable concussion away from Brock Berlin being the starter. Just go ahead and fire Linehan now.

 

They did have Bruce Gradkowski in camp. I remember him being a solid up-and-comer with a bright future, maybe they could bring him back.

[Guest Vitamin X]

Magic Five-

 

1. Regardless of who wins the game, who is the worst team in Ohio and why?

Firmly going with the old "bring back the 90's" motif of the current NFL, I'll say the Bengals, since the Browns at least looked somewhat competitive against the Steelers if it wasn't for stupid turnovers. Also,

This man is starting.

2. Can Houston get anything going this season with the rest of their division riddled with injuries?

Probably not. I know Agent's got a boner for the Texans this year, but even with all the injuries, the rest of the division is way too good for Houston to catch up. Talent-wise, it's just not equal.

3. Based on their play so far, do you think Atlanta will be dangerous this year?

I think they'll be a team that gets anywhere from 6-8 wins and gives the fans hope for next year, similar to the Packers' 2006 season. So they'll beat up whatever crappy teams they have to play, maybe split some games in their division, and get a couple upsets outside. Looking over their schedule, they could upset Green Bay, Philly, Denver, San Diego, or Minnesota.

4. Baltimore is 2-0 against teams with a combined 0-6 record. Will the Pittsburgh offense wake up and put the crapass Ravens in their place?

Yes, definitely. Pittsburgh has been sleepwalking since Week 1 offensively, and Baltimore probably has that Atlanta syndrome. In that case, though, this game could be a wash.

5. How will the coaching situation in Oakland affect their chances this week at home against the divisional favorite Chargers?

They were destined to lose that game, regardless.

GB @ TB- Another tossup. I like Green Bay more than I like Tampa. Although I'm weary a bit of the Packer's secondary.

.. Against the passing juggernaut of Brian Griese? I'm more wary of the Packers' run defense. Just like I said all last week before the Dallas game. They held Romo in check save for two big plays towards the end, where I'd probably say that the wearing down of that defense through the run were able to cause that.

[jimmy no nose 0]

Mike Tomlin's press conference has things looking up for the Ravens this week. The Steelers will be playing without DE Brett Keisel and NT Casey Hampton on the d-line. On offense they will be playing without Willie Parker which means Rashard Mendenhall will get his first start after barely playing the first 3 weeks. Mewelde Moore will also be in the mix there. He didn't say much about Roethlisberger, but I guess he's supposed to play.

[Zetterberg is God 0]

I'm obviously happy with Buffalo's start but their baffling ineptitude against poor teams makes me worried about this week. I expect the Bills to win but I won't be shocked if they don't.

[USC Wuz Robbed! 0]

Brady Quinn is starting? I thought DA was still the starter but with the idea that if he does poorly this week, he'd be yanked fast.

[Kinetic 0]

You are correct, sir.

[jimmy no nose 0]

I just saw on NFL Network that things have gotten so desperate in St. Louis that they've decided their only hope to salvage the season is to turn to Trent Green at QB. Great job spending $65 million dollars on Marc Bulger.

[JaMarcus Russell's #1 Caucasian Fan 0]

Magic Five-

 

1. Regardless of who wins the game, who is the worst team in Ohio and why?

2. Can Houston get anything going this season with the rest of their division riddled with injuries?

3. Based on their play so far, do you think Atlanta will be dangerous this year?

4. Baltimore is 2-0 against teams with a combined 0-6 record. Will the Pittsburgh offense wake up and put the crapass Ravens in their place?

5. How will the coaching situation in Oakland affect their chances this week at home against the divisional favorite Chargers?

 

1. The Bengals are the worst team in Ohio by far. No defense, malcontent star players, and an embattled head coach is a recipe for disaster.

 

2. I think Houston is better then they are showing, but I can't see them digging themselves out of an 0-2 hole. I kinda thought they would competitive at this point, but its a long season and we have seen crazier things.

 

3. The Falcons are the most improved team in the league this year. They won't probably win more than 7 games or so, but they will give some teams problems later down the line.

 

4. I think this game should be close, but the Raven offense won't be able to put many points on the board against an battle hardened Pittsburgh D. I predict a 10-7 final in favor of the Steelers.

 

5. No, because the Raiders aren't even expected do anything against the Chargers. Lane Kiffin should just go for broke here, because really he has nothing to lose anyway.

 

And VX, The Packer secondary would worry me if I were a fan, because the secondary is already banged up as it is, plus you have the possibility of losing Al Harris for the season. Yikes.

[naiwf 0]

Magic Five-

 

1. Regardless of who wins the game, who is the worst team in Ohio and why?

2. Can Houston get anything going this season with the rest of their division riddled with injuries?

3. Based on their play so far, do you think Atlanta will be dangerous this year?

4. Baltimore is 2-0 against teams with a combined 0-6 record. Will the Pittsburgh offense wake up and put the crapass Ravens in their place?

5. How will the coaching situation in Oakland affect their chances this week at home against the divisional favorite Chargers?

 

1. Cincy because they have more talent, especially on offense.

 

2. No. They're the Texans and even if everyone else in the division sucked they'd still have 10 other games to deal with.

 

3. No. Matt Ryan has played 2 good games against lousy teams and 1 horrible one against a playoff contender. That's the recipe for an 8-8 type team if everything breaks well and 5-11 or 6-10 if it doesn't.

 

4. Yes. I hate the Steelers but Marvin's over the top fandom makes me want to see Big Ben and crew put up 50+ on them.

 

5. It won't. They were gonna "get that ass whooped" either way.

[KingPK 0]

I just saw on NFL Network that things have gotten so desperate in St. Louis that they've decided their only hope to salvage the season is to turn to Trent Green at QB. Great job spending $65 million dollars on Marc Bulger.

 

We might have that 0-16 season after all.

[Kinetic 0]

Eh. If it was ever going to happen, it needed to happen last year. There was the symmetry of the Dolphins, who had once posted what was then the only perfect regular season in league history, going winless while their hated division rival New England went undefeated. It also had the added benefit of bringing the Mercury Morrises of the world out of the woodwork, wrestling promo in hand. The Rams or Chiefs going winless is just kind of sad.

[CanadianChris 0]

Eh. If it was ever going to happen, it needed to happen last year. There was the symmetry of the Dolphins, who had once posted what was then the only perfect regular season in league history, going winless while their hated division rival New England went undefeated. It also had the added benefit of bringing the Mercury Morrises of the world out of the woodwork, wrestling promo in hand. The Rams or Chiefs going winless is just kind of sad.

Fucking Ravens.

[Kinetic 0]

I will never forgive the Ravens for that. Be it hurricane, blizzard, or hairless fan dying of a heart attack in the stands, they deserve everything they have coming to them.

[RepoMan 0]

I'm obviously happy with Buffalo's start but their baffling ineptitude against poor teams makes me worried about this week. I expect the Bills to win but I won't be shocked if they don't.

 

I feel the exact same way. Being a Bills fan really screws with your mental health. I feel like I'm jinxing the team if I start to feel any sort of optimism

 

[Guest Vitamin X]

And VX, The Packer secondary would worry me if I were a fan, because the secondary is already banged up as it is, plus you have the possibility of losing Al Harris for the season. Yikes.

 

Oh believe me, it does worry me a bit, but I was just saying that they did an okay job last week outside of those two big plays to Miles Austin. Atari Bigby will be back soon (although not sure if it's going to be this week or what) and Aaron Rouse is a very capable backup at safety; whether he can step in to a DB spot remains to be seen, but they have decent depth there with Williams, Pat Lee, and well.. Jarrett Bush is awful, but I like Pat Lee quite a bit.

 

But the run defense giving up over 200 yards on Sunday was what really worried me. You can get by having a mediocre secondary, but if you allow a team to beat you up on the ground like that, that secondary can only be exploited even more. This brings to mind the awful 4-12 season in 2005 where the Packers had the #1 pass defense and the #23 run defense and thus had the #19 ranking for points allowed. If you can't establish or defend the run, you're in a world of hurt in this game.

[MFer 0]

I just saw on NFL Network that things have gotten so desperate in St. Louis that they've decided their only hope to salvage the season is to turn to Trent Green at QB. Great job spending $65 million dollars on Marc Bulger.

 

We might have that 0-16 season after all.

I was just about to ask if we were gonna finally see 0-16 this season. The Chiefs pretty much tanked the season before it even started plus they might have the worst collection of QB's ever assembled. The Rams can't stop anyone to save their lives. The Lions supposedly went through the "easy" part of their schedule and got blown away from the get-go in each game.

[Kinetic 0]

They'll all win at least one.