This week in the NBA

[Guest C*Z*E*C*H]

From the weird world of the Chicago Bulls, fake coach Vinny Del Negro hired Lou Holtz as a motivational speaker. The capacity of this organization to do really pointless bullshit astounds me.

 

[At the Bulls' gym in Deerfield]

VINNY DEL NEGRO:

Okay, so I hear you don't think I'm a "real coach." Well, that's fine. But guess who I brought in to give you guys a pep talk! A "real coach!" Yeah!

 

ALL (OVERLAPPING):

oh, cool, hey, sweet, damn, yeah, wow, huh.

 

VINNY DEL NEGRO:

See if you can guess who it is.

 

KIRK HINRICH:

Pat Riley?

 

VINNY DEL NEGRO:

No, not Riles. Good guess, though. But think more...college game.

 

DERRICK ROSE:

Coach K?

 

VINNY DEL NEGRO:

Well...college football, I should've said.

 

BEN GORDON:

Did you get Pete Carroll?

 

VINNY DEL NEGRO:

That's a really great guess, Ben, but no. Still, excellent guess, though. Not USC. Think big rivals.

 

JOAKIM NOAH:

Is he from Notre Dame!!!

 

VINNY DEL NEGRO:

Yeah! Now we're talking! Excellent! Way to pick up on that, Joakim.

 

KIRK HINRICH:

So wait, you brought in Charlie Weis to talk to us?

 

VINNY DEL NEGRO:

No. Think older.

 

DRU GOODEN:

Tyrone Willingham?

 

VINNY DEL NEGRO:

No, think whiter.

 

ANDRES NOCIONI:

[stands there slack-jawed]

 

VINNY DEL NEGRO:

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN MISTER LOU HOLTZ EVERYBODY!

 

LOU HOLTZ:

[drools on self, wets pants]

[alfdogg 0]

Troy Murphy is guarding Amare Stoudemire. This can't end well.

[Matt Young 0]

Tonight's a good double header for me. I get to see my first Bulls game this year, where in the early-going, Derrick Rose is looking great against the Cavs. Following that, on FSN, the Lakers play the Clippers. That one might not be as competitive.

[alfdogg 0]

49 for Amare tonight, after scoring 42 here last year. Amare owns the Pacers.

 

The Pacers were playing 5-on-8 for most of the fourth quarter, but I can't remember the last time I saw a team look so sharp offensively in one half, then come out and look like they've never played a game in their goddamn lives in the second. And our bench was barely even there. Hopefully Mike gets back soon.

[Brett Favre 0]

From the weird world of the Chicago Bulls, fake coach Vinny Del Negro hired Lou Holtz as a motivational speaker. The capacity of this organization to do really pointless bullshit astounds me.

 

This is the best thing I've read in weeks. The whole thing you posted, I didn't want to quote the whole thing again.

[alfdogg 0]

Also, watching this Cavs/Bulls game, I'm not sure what people saw in the Bulls when they were projecting them to make the playoffs. They still can't shoot, they still have no inside scoring presence, and their head coach has no coaching experience whatsoever prior to this season.

[Matt Young 0]

Bulls lose 107-93. They made a couple spirited comebacks, but never got closer than within 5 after falling behind by double digits. Ben Gordon looked great off the bench with 31 points.

[PUT THAT DICK IN MY MOUTH! 0]

fake coach Vinny Del Negro

 

This reminded me of a game recap I saw from a few days ago

 

Gordon's wild runner came after Lewis missed the second of two free throws with the Magic leading 94-92 and 22.8 seconds remaining. Del Negro said he "wanted to see if we could get a quick score," choosing not to burn the Bulls' final timeout.

 

Gordon said differently.

 

"We were supposed to rebound and call timeout," Gordon said. "Instead we pushed it and I rushed the shot. Just a bad decision."

 

He needlessly lies to cover for players even when they don't really want him to lol

[alfdogg 0]

And Tony Parker has 52 and counting in double OT against the Wolves.

 

EDIT: Parker finishes with 55 as the Spurs win their first game of the year.

[Matt Young 0]

Back and forth game between the Lakers and Clippers before the Lakers realized, "Hey, this is the team we just beat by almost 40 points last week!" and then proceeded to go on a 22-0 run en route to a 106-88 win.

[alfdogg 0]

 

Man, they even gave him Chauncey's number.

[PUT THAT DICK IN MY MOUTH! 0]

Apparently Stuckey was willing to give up 3 for him but the NBA has some stupid rule against changing numbers mid-season or something.

[Fökai 0]

...doesn't every sport have that rule?

 

 

EDIT: Holy shit, Brandon Roy just daggered the Rockets with a 40-foot heave to win the game, moments after Yao hits a sick and-1 fadeaway to take the lead. Both possessions came with only three seconds left on the clock.

[IllustriousOne 0]

Brandon Roy.

 

Jesus Christ.

[Guest Vitamin X]

And that's why we don't need Oden. Thank you, Brandon Roy!

 

Fuck I wish I could've been at that game.

[Ripper 0]

This whole Steph Marbury thing is just dumb.

 

I mean, I understand, the guy has been a fuck up. But he came into camp in great shape, ran the offense just as well if not better than the points playing now, and they aren't gong to trade, wave or cut him? Thats just....rude.

 

Do think this is Mike D. being an asshole. They gave him time at the point in the preseason and he fucked around and played well. Now they are trying to embarass him into taking a huge pay cut to buy out the contract. I really hope it doesn't work.

[Cheech Tremendous 0]

Looks like the Knicks are going hard after Al Harrington and Golden State wants to deal him, but they can't match up on talent. Warriors aren't particularly interested in a deal for Eddy Curry or a package with David Lee and Malik Rose. It will probably take the involvement of a third team, and both Charlotte and San Antonio seem like possibilities.

[Brett Favre 0]

They like David Lee, but the Knicks don't want to give up Lee. I could see Wallace going GS, Harrington to New York, Curry to SA, and expirings and another player going to Charlotte.

[alfdogg 0]

This whole Steph Marbury thing is just dumb.

 

I mean, I understand, the guy has been a fuck up. But he came into camp in great shape, ran the offense just as well if not better than the points playing now, and they aren't gong to trade, wave or cut him? Thats just....rude.

 

Also, the Knicks wanted to waive Marbury in the offseason, but it was vetoed by Dolan.

[Precious Roy 0]

I get wanting to develop the guys who'll be around beyond this season, but after Stephon did everything they asked and has been a good soldier every step of the way it's pretty shitty to do him like this.

 

Mardy Collins is playing 10 minutes a night so far. Anthony Roberson 8. Do these guys really factor into this team's future? Does Chris Duhon really need to be playing 35-40 minutes a game? Seems like it would be pretty easy to give Steph 20-25 minutes a night.

 

I understand not wanting to waive him because he's definitely going to be tradeable later on. I'm sure he'd have more trade value and could be moved sooner if he was playing, but just as an expiring contract alone he could be moved at the deadline whether he's playing or not. But I do believe that Walsh would balk at taking back any contracts that go beyond the next offseason. However, wacky trades are commonplace in the NBA, come February you might be able to snag a legitimate impact player for next to nothing simply because a team wants cap room to go in another direction. I figure Walsh is hoping some sweet deal falls in his lap, and if he doesn't like what's out there he's content to let the contract run out, or maybe they'd revisit a buyout after the trade deadline if they don't move him.

[naiwf 0]

So now there's a chance Tony Parker could miss 2-4 weeks. The Spurs' season is looking like it may be over before Christmas.

[Fökai 0]

Rick Carlisle with another retarded play-call. If you didn't see it, 0.4 seconds left and the Mavericks are down 3, but with the ball being inbounded from just inside halfcourt, on the right side. Keep that in mind. Kidd, the inbounder, is making the pass regardless of who you match up on him. The only matter is the shooter getting a shot off. So what kind of play do you run with that amount of time left?

 

A. Double-screen which leaves any shooter you want open, at the top of the key. Since you're inbounding from the right side of the court, you can catch and shoot quite easily.

B. Hand off to shooter at the point where Brandon Roy caught the ball last night. A harder shot, but you're guaranteed a look.

C. Run an under-screen, then inbound to the sideline, where the receiver has to catch the ball, while turning his body, and shoot a closer shot. Because it's an under screen on a bounce pass, the shooter is forced to draw contact or fade away.

 

If you choose C, you are Rick Carlisle. Why would you run an inbound pass to the shooter (Gerald Green) that runs across his body...with FOUR-TENTHS OF A SECOND LEFT. Of course, even with a clean look, the clock expires before Green is even squaring up. Is this really that hard? Fuck.