For some reason I find the idea of JR freaking out over a piece of breaking news hilarious.
http://www.kfor.com/
Bah god, a twister running wild threw downtown Ok. City! F-5! F-5! F-5! F-5!
That bastard, Timothy McViegh is seemingly back from the dead, and blown up Mr. McMahon's limo. Damn him! Damn him to Hell!!!!!!!!