bob_barron

SNL Review- Ellen Page/Wilco Cold Opening Cast- Senator Hillary Clinton, Vincent D’Onofrio, Will Forte, Amy Poehler, Fred Armisen, Darrell Hammond Thoughts- I fail to see the point in doing the exact same cold opening from a week ago. I’m sure Lorne got a boner over the media coverage that Hillary being a whiny bitch got, but there was really nothing to add here. The media likes Obama, we get it. I liked Will’s Brian Williams impression, but I’m still not feeling Fred’s Obama. Hopefully in the offseason, they’ll hire a black guy who can do the impression. No matter how good he is (which he’s not), Fred doing the impression just looks so bad. Hillary’s cameo was okay, but it just reeks of desperation. SNL made fun of the campaign, get over it. I bet Mitt Romney is mad that he never thought to cameo on SNL. That would’ve been something to say. Given that Downey has never been a fan of impersonator meets the person they impersonate, I’m sure he was thrilled with Hillary’s cameo. Time to find another thing to mock, guys. **1/4 Monologue Cast- Ellen Page, Andy Samberg Thoughts- Ellen Page looks 12. That leather jacket was just sad. She also seemed way too nervous, as she talked too fast. That’s what the drugs are for, Ellen! Andy was very funny as Diablo Cody, I think this might have been the first time I liked him in a monologue. The mocking of Juno got a bit much, but this was still a fun monologue. *** Dakota Fanning Show Cast- Page, Poehler, Kenan Thompson, Armisen, Jason Sudeikis, Casey Wilson Thoughts- Dakota Fanning sure fell off the face of the earth. I’m still waiting for the movie where she gets raped to come out. A quick check of imdb reveals that while she has some films in the can, none of them have a release date. I don’t see why a show like the Dakota Fanning Show would really need writers since it’s just her interviewing someone. Then again, given Dakota’s character, she seems like someone who would not want to break a strike. I loved the Dakota Fanning Jaywalking segment and I always enjoy her exchanges with Reggie. Great stuff. Page was terrible here, and really brought the skit down. Her portrayal of Miley was incredibly off. I didn’t know Miley was an overly hyperactive girl from Halifax. Oh wait, she’s not. You can win accolades for playing a pregnant girl, but can’t portray Miley Cyrus? Come on Ellen! Still, this was a fun skit and one of the recurring characters I enjoy. ***3/4 TV Funhouse Thoughts- No idea how Smigel thought this was a good idea. I get what he was going for, but it really just didn’t work. The fact that no one sounded like the people they were impersonating didn’t help. Another Smigel misfire. * College for Excellence Cast- Page, Armisen, Kristen Wiig, Thompson, Samberg Thoughts- Was this supposed to be the same character as Fred’s MARBLE CAHLUMS guy? Either way, it was still pretty bad. There were some funny moments here and there, and I liked where Fred tried to explain why his college was above a Korean restaurant and Andy awkwardly walking in and looking at the camera. Fred’s long winded defence of his college killed this one though. *1/2 The Other Boleyn Girls Cast- Page, Sudeikis, Armisen, Hammond Wiig, Thompson, Wilson Thoughts- Really? The Other Boleyn Girl? I understand spoofing There Will Be Blood given that the Oscars were the next day, but really, another weird movie to decide to spoof. Jason was fun as the king, and I enjoyed Kenan, but the rest was junk. For the record, I’d pick Casey Wilson over Ellen Page. ** SNL Digital Short Cast- Page, Samberg, Sudeikis, Wiig Thoughts- Apparently Jorma is off in Los Angeles, so I guess that leaves Akiva to carry the load. I wonder if that’s why the last two digital shorts have not been that great. This one was more scary than funny if anything. Come on, a few times you felt like you were in a Japanese horror film. The ending with Dracula and Wiig was actually pretty funny, even though I felt this went a bit too long. **1/2 Wilco Thoughts- I don’t know anything about Wilco, but I do know I went to Letterman when they were on and I met them. I don’t actually know who I met though. Anyway, this was alright, even though I admit I wasn’t paying too much attention to it. **3/4 Weekend Update Cast- Mayor Rudy Guiliani, Meyers, Poehler, Armisen Thoughts- Weekend Update, the place where flailing Republicans go to vent. I anxiously await a commentary from Mitt Romney next week. Or maybe we’ll get Fred Dalton Thompson! I wonder if Rudy and Thompson had a secret contest to see who could run the worse campaign. I thought Rudy’s commentary was really funny, even though his delivery was terrible. Fred’s commentary was terrible, he has some ratio on Update where for every funny commentary he has about seven terrible times. Amy was okay, but had a few too many clunkers for my liking. Seth’s jokes were really good, and we didn’t have any awful vote for Hillary commentaries! ***1/4 Virginiaca Cast- Page, Thompson, Samberg, Thoughts- Ugh, I hate this character. While Kenan in drag is usually good for a laugh, Virginiaca is just terrible and Page couldn’t save this one. Andy made me laugh once or twice, but let’s put this character out to pasture. ½* Peter Pan Cast- Page, Hader, Thompson, Forte, Armisen, Sudeikis, Poehler Thoughts- What WAS this? Seriously, in the past two weeks some of these skit ideas have been awful. I did laugh at them killing Tinkerbell and her coming back to life, but the rest was terrible. ½* Wilco Thoughts- Well at least the musical guest came through tonight. I liked this song, it had a good sound to it. ***1/4 Aftermath of Melissa Ethridge Cast- Page, Samberg Thoughts- This skit was just weird. I’ve never seen a host basically come out of the closet in a skit before. And apparently, this skit was written by Paula Pell, a huge lesbian. My gaydar definitely was beeping a little throughout the show and it was beeping off the charts during this skit. Come on, you know she’s gotta be gay. This was terrible, but the surreal nature of this skit and the sweet ending meant I couldn’t completely write it off. * The Bottom Line- The avg. skit was **.1 making this a thumbs down. Like last week, many of the skits were flat and uninspiring. Ellen Page added nothing, and was generally a bland host. Hopefully they can shake the rust off for next week, since the ever awesome Amy Adams is hosting, and if they can’t get a good show with her, then that’s just sad. At least we learned Ellen Page is a huge lesbo if nothing else. Thumbs Down

Be Kind Rewind finished in 13th place, dropping 48 percent from the previous week

They did. They wrestled in 2000 a few times I believe

The Other Boleyn Girl did quite well actually. A $7,000 PSA is quite impressive for a movie dumped at the end of February.

Former Pats CB Gay reportedly agrees to contract with Saints ESPN.com news services The New Orleans Saints agreed to a four-year contract with cornerback Randall Gay worth up to $17.8 million, according to NFL.com and the New Orleans Times Picayune. The Times Picayune is reporting that the deal is worth about $6.7 million in salary and bonuses over the first two years, with a chance to go up to $9 million, based on playing time. Gay, who played at LSU, made the Saints his first visit and his first priority in free agency according to the Times Picayune. Gay played all 16 games for the New England Patriots last season. The 25-year-old made three starts with three interceptions and 38 total tackles. Gay is the second cornerback the Patriots lost to free agency this week. Asante Samuel agreed to a six-year deal with the Philadelphia Eagles on Friday.

I think it was the R-rating that hurt it. It kept a lot of his fanbase out.

You do realise he has enough money that he wouldn't have to back to WWE anyway right? He just had the biggest hit of his career, he's doing very well.

Oh, I didn't like it. I'll see what I can write up today and hopefully have it up ASAP

Agreed, he owned this movie. I loved when he It was also cool that Ben Franklin from the Office was his commentating partner

She didn't want to come back. She was working without an official contract this season. Lorne is still trying to get her to return though

I strongly dislike Tina too! It's okay to think that!

Let's pretend it's still last Saturday, and I'm not ridiciously late with this. SNL Review- Tina Fey/Carrie Underwood Cold Opening Cast- Fred Armisen, Amy Poehler, Kristen Wiig, Jason Sudeikis, Will Forte Thoughs- That’s really sad that the best SNL could do is for Barack Obama is Fred. It really wasn’t that good either. As someone who usually watches CNN for debate coverage, they do take delight in Hillary losing, but I think it’s more because they hate her rather than like Obama. They also at one point, seemed to enjoy telling people every five minutes that Mike Huckabee really should drop out. Meanwhile FOX News seems to be a bunch of anchors resigned to the fact that somehow McCain is getting the nomination. This was decent, though it really could’ve been chopped off by several minutes. The questions being asked to Obama by the debate moderators were very funny, but this just didn’t need to go until 11:37. **1/2 Monologue Cast- Steve Martin, Tina Fey Thoughts- Here’s a funny thought: If Steve Martin was available and in New York all week, why not have him host? The fact that he’s only hosted once since 1994-1995 and it was to promote the Pink Panther of all movies. The guy has a book that came out, why couldn’t he promote that? I thought this was really funny, except for Tina’s long-winded WGA explanation. Tina and Martin played off each other well and it’s always great to see him at SNL. ***1/2 Annuale Cast- Fey, Wiig, Poehler, Bill Hader, Armisen, Casey Wilson Thoughts- Hey everyone, Tina’s back! I thought we’d get a vagina joke in the monologue, so I was pleasantly surprised that it took until the commercial for Tina to get her references in. DUD Rock of Love 2 Cast- Fey, Poehler, Jason Sudeikis, Wiig, Wilson Thoughts- Really SNL? Amber? You brought back Amber? Granted, Amber has always been a guilty pleasure of mine, I just wondered why they brought back this character. I’ve seen a little bit of Rock of Love, so I was disappointed when they didn’t make a joke about Bret’s dia-beet-us. This was pretty flat, even though Amber talking about how she has one leg still gets me. ** SNL Digital Short Cast- Hader, Andy Samberg Thoughts- It seems like these guys saw Be Kind Rewind and became inspired. This was one of the weaker digital shorts in a while, even though the shot at Juno was pretty funny. Also, why would someone buy the tapes of Bill and Andy talking to them, since Bill and Andy are not their grandchildren? Wouldn’t that just confuse the old people even more? I did see “There Will Be Blood” with a bunch of old people, and they were pretty confused. Lonely Island was rusty here. ** What’s That Bitch Talking About Cast- Fey, Kenan Thompson, Hader, Poehler, Wiig, Wilson Thoughts- My favourite SNL tradition: The skit you know just isn’t going to work the second it starts. This one really had no chance, and they didn’t even bother to explain Tina’s Rain Man-esque efficiency in knowing what that bitch was talking about. *1/2 Carrie Underwood Thoughts- Carrie Underwood has other songs besides the cheating song and the Enchanted song? Apparently she does, but that doesn’t mean she should be singing them. ** Weekend Update Cast- Governor Mike Huckabee, Fey, Poehler, Seth Meyers Thoughts- It was cool seeing Huckabee at the desk, and doubly cool seeing him interact with Seth. I know deep down Seth believes in Faith, Family and Freedom. I wonder if Huckabee tried to hit Seth up for $25. He’s been trying to get me to give him money all week. The jokes were pretty good, I really liked Seth’s Fidel Castro joke the most. Tina’s commentary had its moments, but then when it descended into hell, it made me remember why I was so happy when Tina left. Back in 2005. This Update was going along well, but Tina killed it. *** Celebrity Apprentice Cast- Fey, Armisen, Darrell Hammond, Samberg, Poehler, Forte,Sudeikis, Wiig, Hader, Thompson, Wilson Thoughts- Celebrity Apprentice is possibly the best show on TV right now. It’s 45 minutes of unintentional hilarity, and Piers Morgan, Lennox Lewis and Stephen Baldwin own your TV screen. So it was fun seeing this spoofed. Loved Bill’s John Mark Karr, and Kenan’s Charles Barkley is always nice to see. And the new girl has a nice rack, so that’s great! ***1/4 Wedding Cast- Fey, Wiig, Sudeikis, Forte, Thoughts- Good to see Jason get a chance to shine in a late in the show skit. I loved the Mario Brothers line and his 50 percent marriage line. Not much else to add here, but it’s fun seeing Jason be Jason. *** Hot Air Balloon Cast- Wiig Thoughts- Don’t know what the heck this was, but this eerily reminiscent of that awful gold commercial Kristen did last season. Apparently this was filmed before the strike, so you think in the interim months, someone would’ve realised it was terrible. DUD There Will Be Milkshake Cast- Fey, Hader, Poehler, Forte, Armisen, Thompson, Wilson Thoughts- Even though I’ve seen There Will Be Blood, I youtubed the scene so I could remember what they were talking about. Again, SNL has four months off and the best they can come up with is this? I do recommend everyone see There Will Be Blood, if only because Jim Downey is in it! Yes, I nearly screamed in the theatre. Fred’s Javier Bardem didn’t work. I get what they were going for but again, mocking the final scene in a movie not many people have seen doesn’t really work for me. And it’s not nice to make fun of Juno, when she’s hosting next week! *1/2 Carrie Underwood Thoughts- This was better than the other song, since it had a fast pace and well, didn’t suck. I still wish she had played Ever Ever After though. **1/2 Lady Business Cast- Fey, Samberg, Poehler, Sudeikis, Hader, Armisen, Wiig, Wilson Thoughts- Oh Tina, go away. I will say the 5 minutes I saw of Lipstick Jungle and wanted to kill myself. At least the new girl got a lot of airtime. ¼* The Bottom Line- The avg. skit was *.9 making this a truly terrible thumbs down show. Given that there was rust, and the host was Tina, I really wasn’t too surprised that this show sucked hard. Tina was a terrible host and a lot of the skits were dead on arrival. Hopefully this isn’t a sign of things to come and SNL can go back to the good shows they were doing before the strike. Thumbs Down

As much as I love Maura, her role really should've been cut out of the movie. Easily the worst part of the movie. Okay, I take that back since the was awesome

He's pretty awful in current events

The filter for rape was met.

mole closed a thread about Anna Nicole Smith because it bothered him or something, then he moved it to TCS. I argued him on it, and flippantly said did Anna Nicole rape your mom. mole didn't like it, and the word rape was temporarily banned from TSM. It was brought back though. I was glad, b/c I would've felt really guilty.

I never talked shit about you thinking I was tough, it was more because you acted like a tough nigger from the hood and you looked like a Greek waiter. Thank you! I'm finishing it right now. Very uninspiring show to write about.

I don't think St. Gabe and I are still feuding. He just didn't like me for whatever reason. I also mocked Micah a few times, and he owned me. Don't believe I ever really feuded with Mik. He's a Marlins fan though, so that kind of sucks.

We always argue in Movies/TV thread. And he's always bitching about something stupid I do with being a Mod. "AHH, YOU CHANGED THE SUBTITLE OF THE TOPIC" Shut up. Sorry, I just need to get laid. I would argue Mole's point, but then wouldn't that be proving his argument? Logical quandary right there

That's not very nice Mole. I remember when -iB- came back and started his own message board with Rando. Didn't his IM name have TSM in it too? That's just sad

No, that would be pretty terrible.

The crowd was turning on the match anyway since it was terrible. The botched bulldog just made it worse

That's how I've always looked at it too. I wish the Rock would've worded it better by saying "I can't thank the WWE enough for what they've done for me, but I have no intentions on ever coming back." instead of kissing up to fans by saying crap like "I miss you guys and I wish I could still be there blah blah blah" No, this isn't an angle, since starting one via British tabloid is quite stupid. Rock coming back a few times a year would be pointless. The guy has moved on. He's not a wrestler, he's a professional actor. I'm sure a part of him still misses the fans and the rush of the crowd, but he had his fun and he got out. And Ripper is absolutely correct. If he came back a couple times a year to cut promos, you guys would be bitching about that too.

Mark Linn-Baker played an obnoxious neighbour on a few episodes of Family Matters. I think he also did some directing. Urkel was also on Step by Step.

I think all the money he made from when he headlined has given enough back to the business. Plus, the guy came back in 2003 and 2004 when he really had no reason to. He's an actor now, not a wrestler.