UseTheSledgehammerUh

DONT STEP TO RUN

Wow, Cena is awful.

Last week Show dressed as Tony Soprano. This week it's the RA Mike Golic from Saved by the Bell: The College Years.

At the beginning of 2006, imagine this: "Kevin Federline then kicked off Raw, introducing Smackdown!'s World Champion King Booker."

Oh wow, cheap heat 101 K-Fed.

"10/28/2006: Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings (7 PM)" Bad movie starring Return of the Living Dead 3 star J. Trevor Edmund as the big heel. So watch it.

Oh Corporal Man My Hero Now At His End Ha He Did Not Die

Picture a white Snoop Dogg. And you can't be serious.

The problem is developing teams from steretypical minority gimmicks: The Annoying Gay Cheerleaders, The Funny Black Thugs, and The Old-World Beserkers. The crowd is TRAINED to see them as one-dimensional characters. Why would you CARE about the division when it is clear the characters are WRITTEN and do not DEVELOP. Cryme Tyme may unfortunately face this problem soon. Smackdown!, on the other hand, has tag team matches that BUILD off of the previous encounter, thus leaving the viewers guessing. Plus two of the best workers on the roster have the belts, and are very credible, defending champions. Smackdown just had a *** 1/2 tag match (after a second viewing) on their last PPV, with Kendrick & London being able to work magic and carry anyone to excellence. In this case, they took the green Stevens & James and used the crowd's dislike of their cocky characters and bitch manager, and used that to help get the crowd behind them. Raw, on the other hand, cares about popping ratings with comedy segments, then throwing the teams to the wolves with PPV matches and poor workrate that turns off both casual and smark fans. On Smackdown!, you have likeable tag team champions who defend against teams that don't have stupid gimmicks, and just want to hurt people (Pitbulls) or piss off the crowd by beating their favorites and proving themselves (KC & Idol). They do singles bouts and quickie tag matches, then deliver on PPV. You got a, again, this is just my opinion, and I consider myself a VERY critical fan: ** 1/2 match at the Bash and *** 1/2 match at No Mercy, the second best match on that show behind Benoit/Regal. Is there a way to "fix" the Raw tag divison? Is it really the writers fault? Would you be able to watch a 7-minute match every week between SINGLE members of teams? Shad Vs. Rory McAllister? Mitch Vs. JTG? I'd say not. Smackdown!, on the other hand, has stars finding their niche in the tag division. 20 minutes of London/Regal? Awesome. 10 minutes of Kendrick Vs. Stevens? Well, it might not be great, but it'd be much better than what Raw produces. MAKE THE FANS CARE ABOUT THE BABYFACE TEAMS AND HAVE THEM SEEM REAL AND VULNERABLE, AND NOT JUST TRY TO TOP THE PREVIOUS WEEK'S STEREOTYPICAL JOKE. (Example: Instead of showing "gay" pics of Randy Orton, have Michaels bring up Orton dropping out of the marines. Then have Edge cheer up Orton by reminding him of Michaels' concussion history DUE TO a bunch of marines attacking him. Then attack Michaels and force a concussion injury, which leads to Orton/Edge getting victories. Find a way for DX to regroup, slowly, and build Michaels' spirit back. Leading to the blowoff.) (Instead, you get "you're gay!" "Your dick is small!" "HHH pins Orton." "Let's fight at the PPV!" What's the PAYOFF FOR THE BABYFACES? Much like Vengeance, SummerSlam, and Unforgiven...NO ONE GIVES A SHIT WHEN THE BABYFACES LOOK STRONG IN THE BUILD-UP AND THEN WIN THE BLOWOFF. Fucking WWE.)

Days from now, Rogers' grandchildren will sit on his lap and he'll tell a story of how baseball fans tried to take away his records because they were jealous.

Yeah, that was clearly stated and I think he got it.

Woody Paige just owned Kenny Rogers on Around the Horn, and even Stat Boy was shocked to see Paige give a serious re-enactment of pine tar and dirt sticking to it, in the same exact area as Rogers' "dirt".

I really hope the Tigers win the World Series, since they deserve it and have been the best team in baseball for most of the season. Their "Worst to First" story makes me think of the 1991 World Series. Go Tigers, and Kenny Rogers winning the MVP will be quite interesting, if he can go one more scoreless game.

Um, Orton is facing Triple H AGAIN? I think Maria is gonna win the title. "BROOKLYN, BROOKLYN..."

I saw K-Fed perform his hit song "Let's Smoke Something" on Jay Leno Thursday evening. If anything, he seems extremely confident on the microphone, which made the song come off much better (It wasn't that bad, a stoner-funk "chill" song if that makes any sense, like Snoop Dog's sound, eons better than that horrible rap song which was leaked on the 'net a year ago). They need to tease the smarks and announce the following match for next week's Raw: John Cena Vs. Johnny Nitro & KeviN Federline - Whoever Scores the Pinfall Is the WWE Champion And then just have Cena squash K-Fed easily while Jim Ross vaguely references "that company down South who did something like this".

"It's a fucking midcard act, why the big uproar about this?" Because TNA desperately needs to elevate talent, from, GUESS WHERE, the mid-card. All they have of interest are Joe and Christian (who has been a HORRIBLE babyface and an okay heel). Sting and Jarrett, as this PPV buyrate will soon show, are not draws. And they need more people to hang with Angle when he is eligible to work.

This is like in 1987 when Bam Bam turned down winners like Jimmy Hart and Bobby Heenan for the utterly useless Sir Oliver Humperdink. Thought: Today/Tonight, both the World Series and NFL on FOX have used "Big Time", the WM 22 theme, as promotional video music. It reminded me that "Big Time", like it or not (I like the song), gave WWE's "Show of the Year" a catchy identity. Should TNA have used a theme song for this show?

I'm still alive in my league's yahoo Survivor Pool, as I went with Denver this week. Apparently 45% of the people remaining on Yahoo! picked Jacksonville. :::Nelson Muntz::: "HA HA!"

Logically, why would Roode pick Traci over Sherri and Parker, who have managed countless more champions and have eons more success than Traci?

"If it's the one I'm thinking of (for the US title), than that match was the shit and I'd enjoy watching it again." The Armageddon 2002 match was quite boring. The Vengeance 2003 WWE U.S. Title Tournament Final was pretty good with an interference finish.

The Colts seem to be the Ric Flair of football lately, having close games with the dregs of the league and winning at the end. I think the Colts will win this one by 10. They've just got to beat the Skins. But Washington has stood up to them, and got some special teams points. Long as the Colts can start playing some D their offense should be ok.

In case you're wondering if the Buccaneers are "turning a corner", they're not. The Buccaneers looked like shit today, and the Eagles looked like an even worse shit by a big fat guy. Eagles Stupidity: - McNabb vomiting all over the field today, wasting a CRITICAL timeout that they could have used during that last drive... - Jerome McDumbass's facemask on a sack and then KICKING THE FLAG, causing a 30 yard penalty... - End of the first half - With no timeouts and 8 seconds, on the opponent's 7...throwing the ball to the THREE YARD LINE against three defenders. Clock runs out, no score, no field goal, nothin'. - Craptastic tackling on the Bucs' kick return with 30 seconds left in the game. - Dropped pass after dropped pass. - McNabb's throwing TD passes...to Eagles Killer Ronde Barber. Seriously, it was like Rich Kotite or Buddy Ryan came out and coached a game for old times sake. Worst coached game, IMO, of Reid's tenure in Philly, and certainly McNabb's worst performance in years. Watch NFL Primetime. You'll see two INT returns and a big FG for Tampa. And a bunch of mistakes by Philly. And some puke.

Un F'N Believable I hate the South teams. And now one of the Dallas/Giants dipshit teams will take over first. McNabb needs to rebound big-time against the dying Jags next week or this season is likely over. Especially against that 2nd half schedule after the bye.

The Eagles playcalling, overall offense, and quarterback all look HORRIBLE today. Shades of 2003 w/ Barber's INT.

Joe Buck: "I'm sure there are people saying 'Why didn't he let it go foul?'" WHAT?