PUT THAT DICK IN MY MOUTH!

I continue to hold an inexplicable fondness for Mitt Romney. Like, even though he once said he thinks we should "double Guantanamo," which is both totally fucking stupid and also sort of morally repugnant, I still can't find it in myself to hate him the way I do other idiotic, repugnant politicians. I really wish I could explain this phenomenon, but I can't. Maybe it's the hair?

This thread is literally the most banal thing I've ever seen. I hate myself for having sat here and read through it in its entirety.

Smues really seems to have a problem with people who don't drive like scared old grandmas.

The re-release is going to be a 2-disc set with all sorts of extra shit.

City of God

Found this factoid on Vampire Weekend's wikipedia: Ugh

This is the best paragraph.

They're not even really from Brooklyn, though. They rep the Upper West Side/Morningside Heights, which is even lamer/whiter [redundant???].

I don't remember it super-well, but I don't really recall finding the kid's fate to be that anticlimactic. I mean it was, but that was kind of the point. The kid is simply no match for the judge and so instead of there being some kind of final showdown or whatever he just walks into an outhouse and . Also, yeah, that last paragraph is killer.

From Russia With Love Probably the best Bond movie. Or at least the best Connery one (some days I think On Her Majesty's Secret Service may be its equal/better. Not today, though). At this point the series's decent into camp was a few years off and they were still mostly playing it straight. No one could mistake it for anything other than a Bond movie, but it's grittier/REALER than most everything that came after (save License to Kill and Casino Royale, obv). A lot of it plays like pulpier, less well-crafted Hitchcock (cf. the fight on the train, the helicopter chase, etc). It's awesome, basically.

I saw this really hot blonde sorority-type girl riding a skateboard a couple months ago. She was with a stupid looking skater dude who I thought at first had to just be some guy who was teaching her how to skate or whatever. Then they started holding hands and I just got totally confused/disheartened.

There's so many things wrong with this that I don't even know where to begin.

Nah. You can find better by just poking around YouTube for a few minutes. This, for instance, is like a million times more awesome than anything Girl Talk's ever done (though most of this guy's other stuff is terrible).

But even there he has to go and almost ruin the whole thing by pitch shifting the "Tiny Dancer" chorus. It sounds really dumb and only serves to undercut the sincerity/beauty of the moment. It's completely unnecessary and basically indicative of everything I find off-putting about dude's music.

At the same time, though, I think that saying "It's just party music man!" is sort of lazy excuse-making. It's like those retards who'll defend even the most insipid Hollywood schlock because "it's just a brainless popcorn movie," as if being purposefully stupid/aesthetically worthless somehow excuses that same stupidity/worthlessness. I mean, it is possible to make music that works both as "club music" and as something that can be listened to/appreciated on a deeper level (cf. [insert huge-ass list of cred-building namedrops]). And the thing is, I really think Girl Talk's basic idea of mashing up a bunch of super-recognizable samples could actually produce something truly worthwhile/interesting, but Gillis's shit is just too ADD and never lets anything ride out and coalesce into something meaningful. His music is an endless stream of "holy shit it's _____ & _____" moments and nothing else. It's like Stunin' With My Daddy/Sinead O'Connor is fucking great but then he goes and ruins it by mixing in T.I. and "Gettin Some Head." Why?

Holy shit you really do have the mind of a twelve year old.

Yo not to be a humorless killjoy but I saw a review that called Girl Talk "the indie equivalent of Jock Rock Anthems 6" and I thought that was pretty spot-on. FAKE EDIT: Here's the review in question. It sums up my feelings vis a vis Mr. Gillis pretty well, I think. At the same time, though, it's probably not really worth reading since, I mean, really, what's the point of reading a review of Girl Talk? Shit's totally straight-forward and basically critic proof in the way that eg a Nickelback or Creed album is critic proof--the music is so superficial/surface-oriented that if you enjoy it no amount of pointless critical hand-wringing wrt questions of "authenticity" or "aesthetic merit" or whatev is ever going to dissuade you from that enjoyment. It's just not meant to be engaged with in any deep/meaningful way and I don't even know why I'm typing all this shit about a record don't even care about so I'm just going to stop right now.

I'm honestly a little bit offended that you'd assume I haven't already seen it.

Lost in Translation Hey look, it's Scarlett Johannson looking totally hot in her underwear. Also, Bill Murray's best performance. His karaoke rendition of "More Than This" is like the most melancholy shit ever. And that scene where they're just lying in bed watching TV and talking about life and shit? Oh man. I can't watch this movie without being overcome by a feeling of wistful longing.

This is def. the leading candidate for Worst Song of 2008

Caddyshack

La jetée It's less than 30 minutes long and is constructed almost entirely out of still b/w photos and yet it's totally moving and beautiful in ways that no other film is. The whole thing's on YouTube and so if you've got a half hour to kill I'd highly recommend watching it.

Read a book.

Well, yeah, but I expected you to be on some total dada/Outsider Art tip and you can make that shit for less than nothing. Like, just film a pretty girl putting make-up on and add a voiceover of someone reading passages from The 120 Days of Sodom. Intercut with images of dead fish/the Armenian Genocide. Soundtrack with Ornette Coleman.