Weird/interesting fights

[Guest Banders Kennany]

Last weekend, I saw this monstrosity of a guy (think like 6'3" and 250) take on this little fella (might've been tall dwarf actually) outside of a bar. They had a disagreement, and the big guy leaves to make a phone call, and the little guy starts mouthing about how he's going to go jump him. So his friends (not dwarfs) try to talk him out of it and he ends up all "fuck that" and goes outside.

 

Me and my bud follow, because fights are always fun and it was kind of a sick curiosity to see this little prick get his ass kicked. So anyway, the big guy's on his phone squatting down against the side of the wall. The little guy smacks the phone out of his hand and it smashes against the concrete. The big guy is pissed and says he's going to fuck him up and goes to get his phone while eyeing the little guy. He's like "fuck it little man, you didn't need to get some" and the little guy get up in his face for a second and kicks him square in the nuts.

 

The guy crumbles and gets a pissed-off to hell look in his eyes and grabs the asshole's face and crushes him against the wall. At this point, his four friends jump in and start beating on the big guy, and then the big guy's friends come out and get into it with them. Then some other people started to try and break it up and ended up getting caught in it themselves. Couple other people came in and just started fucking whaling (is that how spell it?) on each other too.

 

I normally try to break fights after I get the satisfaction of them initially happening, but this was a bit too much, so me and my boy pussied out of there quick before the cops came (which they did, according to the paper).

 

Anybody else got any stories of weird or interesting fights?

[kkktookmybabyaway 0]

It was Game 4 of the 1992 NLCS, and there were these drunks behind my friend and I. Early on this one idiot fell down on both of us, which wasn't too comfortable considering Three Rivers Stadium never had padded flooring. The next inning he began saying sh*t to me, but the problem was I didn't know he was talking to me. After about a half-inning of this he tapped me on the shoulder. When I turned around his one buddy held him back -- not because I was going to beat him up or anything. My guess was because I was still in high school, and I could have sued this middle-aged turd for his pickup truck and rifle collection had he laid another hand on me.

 

Anyway shortly thereafter this idiot got into a shouting match with a Braves fan (not the poster, mind you) and his girlfriend. I knew nothing good could come from this. I tugged on my buddy's jacket and we both got up and moved.

 

Just then the idiot slapped the Braves fan's girl and both of them came crashing down.

 

They landed where my friend and I had been just seconds ago.

 

And they continued on down several rows' worth of people.

 

Reason #34 why I don't go to that many sporting events -- drunken idiots and security guards that have as much authority as a drug agent in Columbia...

[Guest cobainwasmurdered]

I beat up a priest once.

 

he wasn't a REAL preist though. it was Halloween.

[Papacita 0]

When I was about 8 or 9, I got in a fight with a kid and ended up beating him with a hockey stick. According to my friends, I beat him so badly, he literally shit himself.

[Anakin Flair 0]

Was his name Sid?

[Guest Choken One]

I got in a fight with our schools starting Middle Linebacker the day of the big Game with like playoff implications..One of my great moments...

 

why did we fight? He stole my Cologne and I called him out on it and he shoved me...and I gave him a haymaker and a weak german suplex (really, I just grabbed his fat and flipped him over)...

[Damaramu 0]

Well...there was the fight where I sent my brother to the hospital...I believe that's already been posted but I'll repost if anybody is curious.

Probably this time this kid that I hated but was alwasys hanging around with my friends was trying to eat lunch with us. This was in High School btw. Anyways he gets his bag in my face and i shove it out of the way and say "Get your fucking bag out of my face" he turns around and shoves me with this hardass look on his face. Now like I've said before...because I'm big it's always the little guys that try to fight me. So I'm like double his size and I stand up and just start fucking wailing on him. The funny thing is though everyone says I had this calm stoic look on my face the entire time.....

[The Metal Maniac 0]

I didn't see this one, BUT...

 

A buddy of mine was at the bars one night with his brother. Upon leaving the bar, they encountered a group of large, black women. The number varies from 6-10 (It was hard for them to remember exactly, because it was dark, they were drunk, and if I told you anymore I'd spoil the rest) but suffice to say, they were greatly outnumbered.

 

Nasty words were exchanged, probably stemming from one of them trying to hit on one of the chicks, them taking it the wrong way, and then it escalated from there to a full-blown fistfight. Now, here's my buddy's moral dilemma:

 

1. He won't run from a fight.

2. He won't beg.

3. He won't hit a woman.

 

So he walked away. As they were punching him. Lots. Like, I saw the guy the next day - he had an eye swollen shut, a huge cut on his face - it wasn't pretty. He just tried to walk away, without hitting back (though he probably did use a fair bit of nasty slurs). Course, had he tried to hit back, the fight would've ended in 3 seconds, cuz the cops would've shown up and arrested him, in all probability.

 

Oh, and I almost forgot the best part. At one point, this one chick seemed to be legit concerned, and told him that he was bleeding pretty bad, and he should go see a doctor. So he put his hand on his face and looked at it (You know, to check for blood) and she used the opportunity to punch him in the face. Greatest heel tactic EVAH.

 

I thought that was pretty crazy. And yes, I heard reports on it both from the guys in the "fight", and from another buddy of mine who watched it, so I think it's fair to say it's an accurate representation of the truth.

[{''({o..o})''} 0]

I piefaced a 50-60 year old lady that tried to take the furby out of my hand after hitting me with her husbands cane.

[BifEverchad 0]

I seen a guy try to give another guy a 'Stunner' during a fight outside a bar one time.

 

My friends and I nearly died laughing.

[MrRant 0]

I remember in 5th grade smashing a kid named Russian named Igor's Commie face into a steel basketball pole because he jumped me from behind. Ended up fracturing his orbital socket and broke his nose.

 

MrRant.... Taking out Commies at the tender age of 12.

[Papacita 0]

I wasn't there, but my brother swears he saw a guy go for a People's Elbow during a fight.

 

He gets the upper hand on the other guy, knocks him down, then turns to the crowd and does Rock's whole arm waving thing (you know...the thing he does before he goes for the elbow), but when he turned around, the guy he was fighting got up and beat the hell outta him.

[Guest stardust]

I piefaced a 50-60 year old lady that tried to take the furby out of my hand after hitting me with her husbands cane.

I think this one wins just for the mental image alone. Well, that and it was over a Furby.

[BifEverchad 0]

I piefaced a 50-60 year old lady that tried to take the furby out of my hand after hitting me with her husbands cane.

I think this one wins just for the mental image alone. Well, that and it was over a Furby.

Agreed.

 

Let's all just take a second to reflect that mental picture...

[Guest BDC]

I've heard the story of the guy that tried a Pedigree in a parking lot fight.

 

Broke his kneecaps good, too.

[{''({o..o})''} 0]

What can I say? It was the first Christmas for them and by getting one I pretty much had a get out of trouble pass for the next 4 months. Plus my nephew still worships the ground I walk on for it, so I'll beat up all the seniors I need to for my family.

[Guest stardust]

Oh. It would've been even funnier if the Furby had been for you, though.

[the max 0]

I saw someone get beaten up with a shoe after hockey practice once.

[Guest stardust]

My mom threw an ashtray and hit my ex-stepfather upside the head with it. He had a lump and a bruise for a good three weeks.

 

And this past New Year's day, I saw my brothers beat the living shit out of each other, which ended with both of them in the ER. One ended up with stitches above his eye and the other had a broken nose, and hand that was broken in three different spots (he had to have surgery on it, too). Yeah, that was fun. I started drinking promptly after my parents left to take them to the emergency room.

[Guest Jay Z. Hollywood]

I got into a fight with Bruins legend Ray Bourque's son when I was 13. It ended in a draw after the coaches separated us. It makes for a good story at parties.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

I was drinking a substantial amount of tequila one night, and this one kid named Ross that I used to get in fights with all the time was being a bastard at the party, so, as I casually leaned back and taunted him, belittling everything from his manhood to his family to his clothes, I angered him to the point of making him rise and take a dive at me. I put my foot up, ala Hansen/Kobashi, and put him on his ass without even standing up. I bitchslapped him and locked him out of the apartment to the uproarious laughter of my shiftless friends.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

My former neighbor, and his crazy bitch girlfriend once got into a knock-down drag out brawl over a...*drumroll*

 

 

Ice Cream Sandwich.

[Ripper 0]

Oh the fights I have seen.

 

Yesterday, this guy and girl got in a fight on the bus over a game of UNO. She said he put down two cards at once or something. Funny stuff.

 

When I was 13 this guy (20 at least) was sitting behind me and my female friend (also 13...remember this...13 years old) and he just started kicking the shit out of our seat on the bus. She says "Could you stop kicking the seat..." He says "Shut up BITCH and SLAPS this thirteen year old girl in the face." Now, this girl, she is a petite little thing, about 5'2 MAYBE 95 lbs soaking wet, stands up and the guy gets up at the same time and trys to slap her again. She grabs his arm, pulls him towards her, grabs the back of his head and slams his mouth into this metal bar on the back of the seat. TEETH WERE EVERY FUCKING WHERE. She then slams his head side ways hitting a vertical bar, DISLODGING the thing from the roof of the bus where it was connected. So now the guy is spitting teeth, has a wide open gase in his top lip about 3 inches long(it looked like his lip was about to fall off) and she has dove on him just wailing on his face.

 

There were about 5-6 guys ready to kick his ass for hitting a girl, but she kicked his ass so quickly, that nobody had a chance. They finally pulled her off of him and he was OUT. The cops woke him up and took him to the hospital before they took him to jail. Funny stuff.

 

4 years later, this guy thought it would be a good idea to tell people he and his friend had a gangbang with her... Her boyfriend, being the psychotic that he was wanted to kill them for lying. But she said no, she would get them all back. So the guy is at the basketball court one day. Big, work out all the time muscle head guy. She sees him and calls him out on his lies so he decides to push her to the ground...Once again, I and a couple of other guys are heading over to kick his ass, but she just pops up and in what was the loudest THWACK I have ever heard punched him in the jaw and he crumbled...literally. She started stomping him in the face and once again by the time I got over to her, I was there to save the guy and not help her. In the end he lost 4 teeth, had a broken nose, and a dislocated jaw...All this from a 5'4 girl that would be classified in the "Fine ass hell department". You always expect to see ugly girls kick ass, but not the pretty ones.

 

She of course was my hero.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

Rip, you either know some wicked chicks, or some sissy guys.

[Ripper 0]

Rip, you either know some wicked chicks, or some sissy guys.

It was the same girl. She could kick people ayass, because she was so cute that people basically would give her the first shot, and she had a hell of a right.

 

When she fought girls it was down right ugly and tramatic and I actually felt sorry for those girls even if they brought it on themselves.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

That's awesome as hell. She needs to fight this wayward roughneck hillbilly woman I work with. Her endless past of abusive family members and boyfriends/husbands led her to learn the martial arts, as well as getting an awe-inspiring sense of confrontational fury.

 

She related a story about some sleazy guy she was with that tried beating her, and she kicked him so hard that it dislocated the dude's hip. She left him screaming in agony on the floor of the garage, forcing him to crawl all the way to the living room to use the phone. She went into elaborate detail about the floor plan of the house at this point, but I don't care to remember all of that. Point is, the bitch is fuckin' mean.

[Guest Plushy Al Logan]

I know some fat guy who does wrestling moves in bars. Last week he told me he F5ed a few guys.

[the max 0]

My former neighbor, and his crazy bitch girlfriend once got into a knock-down drag out brawl over a...*drumroll*

 

 

Ice Cream Sandwich.

Well, what kind of ice cream sandwich? If it's one of those ones that is covered in chocolate, I would have done the same thing.

[Ripper 0]

My former neighbor, and his crazy bitch girlfriend once got into a knock-down drag out brawl over a...*drumroll*

 

 

Ice Cream Sandwich.

Well, what kind of ice cream sandwich? If it's one of those ones that is covered in chocolate, I would have done the same thing.

Shit, any kind of Ice Cream sandwich is worth fighting over. Especially if it is the kind that has chocolate, strawberry, and vanilla ice cream inside. Its muth fuckin ON!

[the max 0]

My former neighbor, and his crazy bitch girlfriend once got into a knock-down drag out brawl over a...*drumroll*

 

 

Ice Cream Sandwich.

Well, what kind of ice cream sandwich? If it's one of those ones that is covered in chocolate, I would have done the same thing.

Shit, any kind of Ice Cream sandwich is worth fighting over. Especially if it is the kind that has chocolate, strawberry, and vanilla ice cream inside. Its muth fuckin ON!

You have one?

 

*knocks Ripper out*