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Teh Lockdown Commentzors!

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TOM FLESHER VS ANN ONITA

 

Thoughts: Let me just say that "I Am the Man" is probably my favorite ring music among active wrestlers besides my own... Is Alilison a lesbian, too? :huh: ... Taamo seems to be Annie's "Craven," if the never-having-beaten comment has any basis in fact; I'd very much like to see what she wrote for Lockdown... As someone who wrestled in high school (nevermind that it was eleven years ago), I really like the "Cement" series; you should use it more often, Tom... I don't know why, but I don't actually believed that Annie actually "f***ed" Wilson, even in kayfabe... I like this HC match a lot if for other reason than because it's a lot like the way I prefer to write them myself: with a minimum of actual accessories used... Of course, I don't have the talent to pull of blood and gore, anyway... I also like the way you seem to have Riley starting to sympathise with Flesher again, as a subtle way of enhancing this hinted heel-turn.

Allison is in fact a lesbian - or at least, that's the theory I'm working under, since Lady Red had a lesbian lover valet that Annie later appropriated when she came back as herself.

 

Annie has actually never beaten me. We had a lot of action over the US Title - lots of three-ways with Xero and Ash - the month or two after I got bumped, and then we get thrown together once in a while now that our paths aren't intersecting quite as readily.

 

Annie did fuck Chris Wilson. Shh. Someone else might remember, too.

 

And thanks for the props on the cement moves. (Y)

 

- Taamo, official Annie Eclectic Character Historian

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Cement moves? :huh: I really need to buy a "Basic Mat Wrestling For Idiots" guide for some of this stuff, geeze.

 

I also can't believe WC doesn't like Johnny's music as he suggested it to me in the first place. I'll have to go DL "I Am the Man" as I have never heard it.

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I never said that I didn't like it; I just said that I like "I Am the Man" better. If I were to rate the themes of the active wrestlers according to what I like, it'd be something like this:

 

1. Let's Get Dirty

 

...

 

 

2. I Am the Man

3. After the Flesh

 

4. Y.O.U.

 

...

 

 

5. Some Kind of Monster

 

 

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EDIT:

 

6. (tie) almost everything else

 

...

 

...

 

...

 

7. Hero

Edited by Mr. S£im Citrus

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Guest Goodear
WC, if my memory serves correct, on the first Raw video game for Xbox, there's a Spider German Suplex for when the opponent is on the ground on their stomach, where you lift them up from the ground, up and over. Of course, Raw probably isn't the best game to take move names from, but that's what I based it off of.

Ok, now that we've established what the spider German is... what is the move that Grappler actually did called? I know its something that Gary Albright used to do but I don't know if it has a technical name or not.

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Cement moves? :huh: I really need to buy a "Basic Mat Wrestling For Idiots" guide for some of this stuff, geeze.

They're in my stats... they're basically a bunch of moves off a front headlock/facelock that I patterned after Ken Chertow's Cement Job (which I preserved in its original state), and they're moves that I got to like using as a Greco-Roman heavyweight. I hope the descriptions are clear, and I did link to an anigif of the Cement Job, but if you need anything clarified I'd be more than happy to try.

 

I like them because they're relatively low risk (okay, maybe not the Cement Mixer) and offer a good chance to put the opponent on his back.

 

And, again, when I get home today I'll try to pick up with Window Pain and offer more in-depth comments.

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I would like to say... to WC... and anyone else that thought the disappearing act at the end of my match was odd...

 

 

I was trying to mention in the match that Alan did have a LITTLE blood on his face...like he had just wiped it off.

 

Out of kayfabe it was more like: run backstage, change black shirt to white (or have white under black and tear off black), wipe off face with black shirt, toss it away and walk out through curtain to mess with Landon...

 

Out of kayfabe...it's reasonably possible

In kayfabe ... it's just another mind game. even it if it MAY be a little 1994 Taker-ish. I'll try to pull away from that, but as I think I stated...I didn't want to give Bloodshed a proper intro or exit...and rather it be an act of surprise, first to Dace/the crowd/etc ...then to Landon.

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Well, even if it's a UK thing, I don't have a clue what bullbars are either.

I'm sure it's been said already. They're the large bars you often see on the front of SUVs and other big 4WDs, and occasionally in the outback, you see them on utes. They're basically there as armour against a collision - commonly used in the outback, hence how it got the name 'bullbar'.

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Cement moves?  :huh:  I really need to buy a "Basic Mat Wrestling For Idiots" guide for some of this stuff, geeze.

They're in my stats... they're basically a bunch of moves off a front headlock/facelock that I patterned after Ken Chertow's Cement Job (which I preserved in its original state), and they're moves that I got to like using as a Greco-Roman heavyweight. I hope the descriptions are clear, and I did link to an anigif of the Cement Job, but if you need anything clarified I'd be more than happy to try.

 

I like them because they're relatively low risk (okay, maybe not the Cement Mixer) and offer a good chance to put the opponent on his back.

 

And, again, when I get home today I'll try to pick up with Window Pain and offer more in-depth comments.

"Ken Chertow?" :lol:

 

That sooo should have been Fugue's real name...

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Moving ON with the fed and everything that happened yesterday, I'm going to the effort of actually reading and commenting on this show, which I should probably be doing regardless. Or at the very least, constantly dropping comments about the matches that I mark.

 

Anyway, this goes in two parts, because my comments are indellibly long and reflective. This means you should respond to them, because I hate handing this stuff out and not being asked any further questions, since I've almost always got more to say if you'll let me. :D

 

OPENING OPENING PROMO OPENER THING:

 

Yes, I wrote it, and the other two promos dealing with Mark. A pretty straightforward setup promo for the two later in the night is about all this is. Bonus points if you know who Steve Simon is.

 

OPENING PROMO:

 

I think you're less of a bad promo writer, WC, than you're someone used to writing a character who doesn't speak very much. It doesn't help that MVS is pretty vanilla. Calling out Flesher and having Mike respond was an... odd way to set it up, but I suppose it works well enough. I know what this is... well, WAS setting up, and I do hope that Mike actually intends to follow through with it. Not a bad promo, although it ends up looking kinda' silly considering the results of James/Van Siclen.

 

PHILLY STREET FIGHT PART UNO:

 

I loved reading every part of this match, I just want to say. Both guys wrote really great, different matches and I enjoyed them thoroughly. I went with Toxxic since I think he used the stipulation more effectively, to better ends than IL did. Starting from here, I think it all just flowed together a little better, a little more logically. I didn't like the no commentary aspect very much, though that's a minor nitpick. More or less because it looked dumb after Wildchild's promo.

 

JAMES vs MVS:

 

G0RO BEINGZ CURIOUSLY HUNGRY WRESTLERZ OMGWTF!!1!1!1!!11@!11!!!1

 

GRAND SLAM SEGMENT NUMBER TWO:

 

Idea for removing GSMS from storyline was suggested by the man himself, actually. Once again, this sort of thing is all pretty routine for me to write (as if anything related to me writing should ever be called 'routine'), and I didn't like it a whole lot. My strength is dialogue, and when there's only one person to have interplay with, it doesn't work out so well. I only really hope I got Mark down as an accurately concerned husband.

 

JANUS/AECAS vs WILD & DANGEROUS

 

I didn't like how the commentary had too many exclamation marks! It was really annoying! They were also present in the match proper, which made that half read a little awkwardly. It was one of the more telling points of where Aecas and Janus had switched off, and you two may want to work on matching styles just a little better. Anyway, two things really stood out to me from this match: 1) Great power vs speed affair. The wrestling was really the high point, as it flowed well and there was no real visible change in style from the two halves, which is more important than the minor discrepancies I saw. Of course, when you've got two characters who are also identical, it's not a big stretch to understand why that's the case. However, it's also part of the other point. 2) The match, unfortunately, lacked drama. With two guys who are sooooooo huge, it's very difficult to properly do a face in peril segment, so I think you two may have to find a new, original way of building the match to a zenith. I think the entire Terrance vs Janus personality conflict can work as an internal storyline within the matches, creating the tension of 'what the fuck is Janus going to do once he gets into the ring?' whenever you face heels teams. Also as a note, I had a reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal hard time believeing Bobby would support Wild and Dangerous instead of Janus... well, becoming Janus at the finish.

 

TOM FLESHER vs ANNIE

 

Tom, first thing that occured to me: You... really don't write Comet all that well, heh. REALLY don't write him well. Comet doing analysis that dryly is wrong on dozens of levels. Match was okay, but seemed kinda pedestrian at times. I liked some of the clever references to the past, but I think you could've gone a little more obvious with them, especially digging out some of your classic spots. After all, how am I supposed to accept Flesher's oscilation back to prickhead heel without the delayed sell? OR the bootscrape? Finish was a nice touch, although I'm probably the only one besides you who remembers that far back into your career.

 

Phew. I'm going to take a breather, and then have the rest of the show reviewed a little later.

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Guest Suicide King

Hmm... a good show, I thought. It was a little flat overall maybe, but that seems to be because the build for several plots are just now starting. The next few shows should be quite interesting.

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...Also as a note, I had a reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal hard time believeing Bobby would support Wild and Dangerous instead of Janus...

I wasn't going to say anything, because I was afraid it was going to come off like sour grapes, but this really bugged me, too. It was the only thing that I actively disliked out of an otherwise very good match; in kayfabe terms, I can't think of anybody that Riley would ever root for W&D to beat... well, maybe Cutthroat, but that's about it...

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Guest Aecas

*blames Janus for the excessive exclamation marks*

 

Tune down that editing of yours! :P

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7. Hero

Wow, a Rap/Hip Hop fan not liking Melodic Death Metal..what a shock there. :P

 

Could be worse, could still be using some of my older themes.

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I didn't like how the commentary had too many exclamation marks! It was really annoying! They were also present in the match proper, which made that half read a little awkwardly.

 

*takes note* Right, less exclamation marks then. Easily done. Though I think it's some part of me trying to capture the sudden and surprising impact of moves through text. It reads well in my mind, but not in everyone else's I see. ;)

 

I think the entire Terrance vs Janus personality conflict can work as an internal storyline within the matches, creating the tension of 'what the fuck is Janus going to do once he gets into the ring?' whenever you face heels teams.

 

I'm trying to work out just how to manage something like this. At the moment it's like they're both there, but there's no real reason or direction behind the personality shifts other than convienence. I need to do something about this. Any suggestions? (Preferably in private :P)

 

Also as a note, I had a reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal hard time believeing Bobby would support Wild and Dangerous instead of Janus... well, becoming Janus at the finish.

 

Comet was backing the Trinity, so as a 'rule', Riley had to back W&D. Besides, the reason he didn't cheer for Janus, in my mind, was because of the fact Bobby verbally fellates Duran, and we all know what Janus did to Mr Notorious' neck. *shrug* That's just me, though.

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OVerall it was a good show, and congrats to the tag team champions, marking the second tag titles for the Unholy Trinity (grief, seems so long since Dace/Va'aiga ACTUALLY BEAT JnR)

 

on the subject of theme music *checks in SWF theme music folder*

 

My fave woudl be... The Gauntlet prolly. Sleep Now In The Fire and Lets Get Dirty up there.

 

My least favourites are... that Jericho tat Landon uses, covers of Slayer, the Jester's Dance (too poncey)and the Linkin Park users (Erek and Craven both used Linkin Park)

 

on the subject of moves

 

Cement series is still too amaresu to fit in my knowledge.

 

I like the Spider German. Danny or Dace could prolly correct me, but isn't it a Tenryu move? I know a few joshi girls do it - and it's not THAT far to a Death Lake Driver from a spider german.

 

on the subject of bullbars... i know what bullbars are. Maybe they just don't have them down in the fenlands. Of course down where Landon lives noone goes out on the fens at night anyway... there be monsters out there....

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Comet was backing the Trinity, so as a 'rule', Riley had to back W&D. Besides, the reason he didn't cheer for Janus, in my mind, was because of the fact Bobby verbally fellates Duran, and we all know what Janus did to Mr Notorious' neck. *shrug* That's just me, though.

I don't think Riley has to cheer for anyone if it's two face teams. However, I think Riley would like the brutality over flip-flopping-springing through the ring style of W&D, and for the emergence of Janus.

 

Speaking of that... just have Terrence's eyes turn green all of a sudden, with him gritting his teeth and growling like David Banner on the old Incredible Hulk TV series. You can call it "Bailing Out". You know like: "Oh my God, Terrence is bailing out, here comes Janus!!"

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TOM FLESHER vs ANNIE

 

Tom, first thing that occured to me: You... really don't write Comet all that well, heh. REALLY don't write him well. Comet doing analysis that dryly is wrong on dozens of levels.

Yeah, that's a big issue that I'm aware of. I'm just so used to the pbp face straight man/heel color funny man team that's... existed in wrestling since the dawn of time that I revert to it when I'm sprinting (which I most certainly was with this match).

 

Match was okay, but seemed kinda pedestrian at times. I liked some of the clever references to the past, but I think you could've gone a little more obvious with them, especially digging out some of your classic spots. After all, how am I supposed to accept Flesher's oscilation back to prickhead heel without the delayed sell? OR the bootscrape?

 

Because I'm not totally a heel yet?

 

Finish was a nice touch, although I'm probably the only one besides you who remembers that far back into your career.

 

That's actually why I went out of my way to mention it 9 gazillion times in the match. Glad to see I didn't overdo it.

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Speaking of that... just have Terrence's eyes turn green all of a sudden, with him gritting his teeth and growling like David Banner on the old Incredible Hulk TV series.

....bwahahahahaahahaha.

 

"Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry..."

 

Sadly, I think Chris Raynor has a patent on ripping off the HULK SMASH with "CHRIS SMASH!" :P ;)

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Continued comments! What, would I lie to you?

 

STRYKE vs WEST

 

"A wizard did it" is a-ok in my book, as far as explaining Stryke's return goes. As far as escape-rules cage matches go, this was really your quintessential match. Some solid brawling in the cage, a few good spots involving the stipulation, and, of course, a "holy shit" bump off the top. Not spectacular, but since it did beat Coyjiro, I have to take my hat off to Stryke for making the most of his oppertunity. As with winning the ICTV title some time ago, this sort of thing proves he's a woefully underrated writer simply because he doesn't go to the effort often enough. And I thought Janus/Aecas vs W&D was the upset of the night, yeesh.

 

ROYAL vs DURAN

 

Todd should be from some place like "The Gates of Heaven" instead of San Diego, I say. First cameo appearance of IL and Toxxic on the night here, which honestly surprised me. I thought they might at least get a couple of sentances in one of the other matches, but ah well. I have to say that this match NOT being a Fingerpoke of Doom-like screwjob is pleasantly surprising, and making it a respectable rasslin' affair is a nice way to play it. comet ASKING for Duran and Royal to cheat is a cute touch. Good match all around, and a great way to spin it so it's not OMG STABLES WHO HATE ONE ANOTHER WTF!?11?!?1?1!?1 I think it's time to kick up the build for Grappler/Duran beyond these end of match promos, though. There's fewer shows to the PPV than you guys think, I'd bet.

 

TOXXIC vs IL DEUX

 

You noted in your PM to me with the match that you approached it like a Mall Brawl, but I tend to disagree. It's more lightheatred than IL's match, but it's not out-and-out SILLY like a Mall Brawl is. I'd just like to note that I love your use of the Memphis Eel. I also think the action replay bits are smart, from a logistics standpoint. Both you and IL made a point to include the weedwhacker getting revved up, which incited a cheer from me both times. Pity it didn't get USED in your match, but... maybe that's just as well.

 

CLARK vs DACE

 

Reintroducing Bloodshed is an interesting way to approach this match, and an interesting twist in Clark's character. Bloodshed walking through the broken glass, shoeless, made me grimace. Ultimately, though, I think the whole match had me feeling that way... if it wasn't chock-full of hardcore spots loosely connected to each other, there was wrestling that seemed VERY out of place. The match really lacked flow, which was a problem. It should've been more brawling and built around spots that DIDN'T involve the glass, building up the drama of someone actually going through the table. I don't think Dace's mastery of the genre, so to speak, was played up well enough either. As an upside, The Toxxic/IL appearance and subsequent pinfalls were nicely done, although I know they had been asked to be included already.

 

MAIN EVENT

 

Grappler continues to be really awesome, although I'm going to have to go on record and say that he outclassed Landon, straight up, for this one. Great brawl, great build, great atmosphere... this is why Grappler is champion, everybody. I almost gave the match away to SS on the principle of reintroducing the baguette ALONE, and including the great line "...with malicious, French intent..." Gold. A suburb match from top to bottom; I especially loved the finish, and reiterate that it's time for Grappler/Duran build to shift up into overdrive. I did edit the last line of commentary for the sake of continuity, in case you were wondering, Grap.

 

TOXXIC vs IL PART TRIES

 

Probably the most hardcore-style segment, and maybe my favourite of the three. Hard to tell since once agian, I enjoyed reading all of this match. Liked that both of you decided to go for the 'after the main event' aspect. Just a great way to cap off the match, with a furious dash to the finish. I do think that the moonsault off the top of the Smarktron was overkill, and that the Eel stunnering everyone after the match was... well, dumb, but it was written to almost fit into the match. A fine bit of insanity to end an entire show of it.

 

CLOSING PROMO

 

To be honest, the new commissioner isn't that hard to guess, but WHY he's going to be coming in... that's the hard part. I hope I managed to be dramatic enough to at least get people interested, or something.

 

And wow, that's that. I'm sorry to admit that's the first SWF show I've read top-to-bottom in a little while... and damn, these fucking things are BIG. Now I suppose I need to go comment on some promos. Aaaaaahhh!

 

-Z

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I do think that the moonsault off the top of the Smarktron was overkill, and that the Eel stunnering everyone after the match was... well, dumb, but it was written to almost fit into the match.

 

The moonsault - well, IL says that NOTHING is too extreme for his character, and he does have his Leap of Faith balcony moonsault in his moves, so i went for it. As for the Eel - i KNOW it was dumb, but the moment I imagined Bobby Riley shouting "He's an eel! He'll turn on ya!" my mind was made up.

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