Ever been chased by a wild animal?

[Damaramu 0]

Undoubtedly one of the funniest things are people being chased by animals. Especially if the animal isn't that menacing but you run anyways. So who here has an amusing animal chase story?

 

One time when I was working at Little Caesars I went to deliver a pizza to some people. They lived just on the outskirts of the city and had a lot of land. I walk up and what is standing in front of the door? A fucking big ass rooster! I didn't even see a god damn chicken coop anywhere. I was like "Umm.....hello? What the fuck?" It started walking towards me and I was like "Shit....." and the motherfuckers started running at me. I wasn't going to get sliced by his god damn talons so I took off back to my car. All I could do was sit in my car and honk until they came out of their house and called off the chicken of war. I was just like "Fucking god damn hicks with your god damn pet rooster!" I mean who keeps a pet rooster!?

 

I was also chased by a turkey one time. My grandma owns a lot of land way outside the city and my great aunt lives out their to and she has a lot of wild birds as pets. She has ducks, guineas, and a freaking turkey. Those things are so god damn stupid. It chased my car and pecked at my tires.

 

So anyone been chased by any animals? Anything funny?

[Guest Nanks]

A swan, when I was little and feeding the swans and ducks at the Botanical Gardens in Melbourne. Those pricks are fucking big when you're about 4 and they go nuts.

 

A couple of friends of mine got chased by an emu at Healsville Sanctuary once too. That was fucking hilarious. They were running full pelt and this thing was just kind of strolling after them. Emu are fucking fast, similar to ostriches.

[Guest Sturgis]

During a Wednesday of winter break, my friend and I, bored off our asses got to a pond behind the neighborhood. We find an open pack of Rolaids and throw them in the water. The ducks go after them, which is mildly amusing to us, so we keep doing it. We hear some quacks behind us, but think nothing of it. 10 seconds later I turn around and there are 7 ducks looking rather pissed off. I point this out to my friend, we start slowly backpeddling and then the lead duck flaps its wings and we take off running and screaming.

[Ted the Poster 0]

Some Canadian geese landed in a friend's backyard one year. We were feeding them some bread, and one of them inexplicably ran at my buddy and slammed its beak down on his crotch. He tried for about five seconds to shake it off before he finally threw water on it and it let go. When you're eleven that is the funniest thing EVER.

[Guest Shutterspeed]

I haven't been chased, but I've been trapped by a pack of dingos.

[justsoyouknow 0]

I had an ex chase me around with a paintball gun once. That's the closest, though. Bitch was crazy.

[Guest Shutterspeed]

Skirmish~

[justsoyouknow 0]

I have very tender skin, you know.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

I've been bitten, pecked, or stung by the following list of creatures:

 

Horsefly

Mosquito

Spider

Centipede

Bumblebee

Honey Bee

Paper Wasp

Yogi bear hornets

Fire ants

Praying Mantis

Dog-Rottweiler, German Shepherd, Collie, Toy Poodle, several hillbilly hounds.

Cat

Rat

Mouse

Hamster

Gerbil

Rooster

Hen

Turkey

Goose

 

I think that's it but more might come to me.

[tommytomlin 0]

I was at Dubbo Zoo outside Sydney when I was about thirteen, and we went and had lunch at this picnic table, and an EMU (like an ostrich) CHASED ME. That's about the extent of the story (it got bored after a few seconds), but when I returned to school, I was telling the story to some of my mates and something hit my leg underneath the table, and I swear to god I jumped back thinking it was the Emu back for revenge.

[Angel_Grace_Blue 0]

Got knocked on my ass by a goat at a petting zoo when I was like three or something. Apparently, I was touching the goat's kid a bit too much.

 

Back in Mississippi, we'd always get lizards coming in to the house for warmth (Not so much in Alabama, for some reason...), so one day as I was wrangling one to take outside, it jerked around and 'bit' my hand. Didn't have teeth as it wasn't like a gila monster or a monitor or whatever, but I kinda freaked and shook my hand and it flew off.

[Downhome 0]

You haven't lived until you've had run for your life from, as well as chase them yourself, two of these...the dreaded Emu. They are usually pretty cool, but when they get pissed they let you know it. My sister-in-law moved away, and she left the two birds for us to care for, and they were such a pain in the ass. They escaped from the fenced area almost every day, leaving me to run around our property trying to herd them back into the fenced in area. They could get really pissed off, and decide to chase you instead of you chasing them. It hurt like a bastard when they would peck you or kick you.

 

I'm glad we sold em.

 

 

[MrRant 0]

I've been bitten, pecked, or stung by the following list of creatures:

 

Horsefly

Mosquito

Spider

Centipede

Bumblebee

Honey Bee

Paper Wasp

Yogi bear hornets

Fire ants

Praying Mantis

Dog-Rottweiler, German Shepherd, Collie, Toy Poodle, several hillbilly hounds.

Cat

Rat

Mouse

Hamster

Gerbil

Rooster

Hen

Turkey

Goose

 

I think that's it but more might come to me.

Clearly you must engage in battle with this:

 

 

[Damaramu 0]

I love animals. I wouldn't mind having an Emu. It's kind of cute.

[The Niggardly King 0]

A goose when I was 14. It was during their mating season, and I was walking around in the park, and got in its area. Fucker tryed to destroy my nuts.

[Guest Nanks]

That's hilarious. 3 Emu stories. I've rarely laughed so hard than watching one of those things chase these three guys who I didn't particularly care for.

 

Downhome, how did you get your hands on them?? I didn't know we were exporting our native fauna now...

 

They taste pretty good I might add.

[Damaramu 0]

Yeah someone has an Emu farm out near my grandparents land.

I thought it was weird at first. I was like "this is Oklahoma. You'd think there'd be farms everywhere. I've never seen one and when I finally do they have freaking EMUS!"

[The Ill One 0]

Well a while back one of my friends was stupid and were skateboarding near some stairs by a pond where some geese were. He started taunting them and it led to all of us being chased by geese. A bee when I was five which stung me inside my ear. Yeah, that was a bitch. Oh and once a stray ferret kept gnawing at my shoes.

[Guest CronoT]

Did anyone else look at this pic, and think "Lita?"

[Damaramu 0]

Is it just me or do a lot of people get chased by giant birds?

[The Ill One 0]

 

He's still at large.

 

Oh and Agent needs to encounter a platypus.

[Damaramu 0]

I knew there was a mastermind behind it all.

[Star Ocean 3 0]

A hummingbird almost flew into my face in my backyard.

[The Amazing Rando 0]

Did anyone else look at this pic, and think "Lita?"

[Kahran Ramsus 0]

I used to leave my pet duck at a friend's farm whenever I went on vacation, and they had this big ass goose that would chase after me whenever it even caught sight of me.

 

I've also had encounters with some snakes. One was a Western Diamondback in a reptile farm in Southern Ontario. Funnier was a water moccasin I encountered in the woods of Central Florida. Which is only funny because I was riding a horse at the time and it just took off as soon as it saw the snake.

 

Speaking of horses, I was also tossed in the middle of a swamp by one too once.

 

Swans, emus & llamas don't seem to like me too much either. Emus especially are real jerks.

[CBright7831 0]

I was at the zoo once and went to see the lion exhibit. We were seperated by glass, by one of thel ions saw me, stared, and finally sat down, and continued to stare. It began to growl at me. Not to be intimidated, I crossed my arms and stared straight back at him. We had a stand off for quite awhile. I wonder what would have happened if it would have charged the steel plate glass.

[Guest El Satanico]

I guess that lion doesn't take kindly to your type

[Kahran Ramsus 0]

I was at the zoo once and went to see the lion exhibit. We were seperated by glass, by one of thel ions saw me, stared, and finally sat down, and continued to stare. It began to growl at me. Not to be intimidated, I crossed my arms and stared straight back at him. We had a stand off for quite awhile. I wonder what would have happened if it would have charged the steel plate glass.

The ol' stare down, eh? I always used to do that to bull sharks at Sea World in Orlando 'til they got fed up and left. Good times...

[Damaramu 0]

I was at the zoo once and went to see the lion exhibit. We were seperated by glass, by one of thel ions saw me, stared, and finally sat down, and continued to stare. It began to growl at me. Not to be intimidated, I crossed my arms and stared straight back at him. We had a stand off for quite awhile. I wonder what would have happened if it would have charged the steel plate glass.

Big man with the glass in front of you hehe.

 

This isn't really a chase story but when I was at the OKC Zoo I walked up to a monkey cage that had chimps in it. One was sitting up on top a hill looking at me and my friends. He was doing just fine then my friend Lisa walked up. He didn't like her to much b/c he started shooing us. Like waving his hand at us to go away. She just stood there and then he picked up a rock and threw it at her. Since there wasn't any glass there it hit her and she ran off and he was complacent again.

[Slayer 0]

I'm still chuckling at the thought of Kahran and his pet duck