Ozzfest '06

[jimmy no nose 0]

I'm thinking at this point SOD is never happening again after all Billy vs. Scott and Charlie talk the past few years. Rumor has it there's a new live album coming out this year that was recorded in '99 in Europe, just to follow the 7 year plan, but that's it. I think Billy is still occasionally threatening to bring in a new drummer and guitarist, but Lilker has said he probably wouldn't do that, so basically it just ends up being MOD.

[Paul Stanley 0]

And fuck Anthrax, I want SOD to tour again.

 

 

Good luck.

 

I wish too.

[Red Baron 0]

SOD are overrated by the metal community.

 

By no means Anthrax is better than SOD.

[Styles 0]

1- yes, this lineup is awful.

 

2- metallica have confirmed in a video posting to fan club members that the Ozzfest rumors are false (although Lars was diplomatic saying "it'd be fun to do one day" or something to that effect) and that they're spending the majority of their summer recording their new album with Rick Rubin.

 

3- Yes, there will be another Gigantour this year, and it better fucking come close to the DC/Balt area this year because I was pissed I didn't go last year. Lineup should come out within the next month but the rumored bands are Judas Priest (if they're on they'd headline), Megadeth (duh), Anthrax, Overkill and Death Angel. Oh yes. Did I mention they better hit DC/Balt?

[Red Baron 0]

They can leave without Overkill. Fuck em, seriously. King Diamond, Mercyful Fate, Diamond Head are all better than Overkill.

 

Get Testament for all I fuckin care.

[Styles 0]

"for all I care?" don't you be hatin' on Testament, boy.

[The Czech Republic 0]

Rick Rubin?!? bahahahaha. Metallica is fading fast.

[Styles 0]

Rick Rubin?!? bahahahaha. Metallica is fading fast.

 

I fail to see how Rick Rubin can be a step down from Bob Rock, but ok.

[Corey_Lazarus 0]

Rubin produced some of the best metal albums in history (the trio of Reign In Blood, South of Heaven, and Seasons in the Abyss), so I'm going to be interested to see what happens with him and Metallica.

[Steviekick 0]

Rubin produced some of the best metal albums in history (the trio of Reign In Blood, South of Heaven, and Seasons in the Abyss), so I'm going to be interested to see what happens with him and Metallica.

 

Same here. I have a lot of respect for Rubin as a producer, and I'm very curious how this will work out.

[Corey_Lazarus 0]

I remember when I was still in TDR (wow, all of 3 months ago), Ricky and Ilya were trying to convince me that Rubin was a terrible producer. I shoved those three albums out at them and went "tell me he hasn't produced good shit." I handed them Cash's last album. "Tell me he hasn't produced good shit."

 

...they said Ross Robinson was better...and I proverbially bitch-slapped them by saying how much most of the bands he's produced has sucked.

[Steviekick 0]

At best, Robinson's work is generic. Rubin has worked a really diverse group of bands. He even made the last Slipknot album tolerable.

[Red Baron 0]

Czech hates rap, and Rick Rubin produced a lot of rap records.

 

Thus Czech is a bigger idiot than he thinks.

[Si82 0]

Rick Rubin?!? bahahahaha. Metallica is fading fast.

 

I fail to see how Rick Rubin can be a step down from Bob Rock, but ok.

What happend to Bob Rock?

[Red Baron 0]

Finally Metallica realized that Bob Rocks makes crappy albums after one solid album.

 

Mr. Rock should go back to Canada and re-united Payolas for I care.

[Styles 0]

Rick Rubin?!? bahahahaha. Metallica is fading fast.

 

I fail to see how Rick Rubin can be a step down from Bob Rock, but ok.

What happend to Bob Rock?

 

Rock is working with Motley Crue on their album and "unable due to time restraints to fulfill his commitment to Metallica as well" or something political to that effect that basically says they realised they needed a change badly. Rock always seemed like a nice guy but someone more suited to make pop-rock then metal. I think if nothing else Rubin will challange them more than they've been in over a decade and I'm very excited to hear the results.

[Corey_Lazarus 0]

Yeah. He tends to do that.

 

Picked up Bigger Than The Devil this weekend...not nearly as fucking awesome as Speak English Or Die, but decent.

[Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye 0]

There's no need to worry about Metallica anymore(Since 1991...well the box set was nice anyway). They're too obsessed with money and sharing their innermost fantasies with each other.

 

-----

 

Last August I got a chance to see Metallica at an outdoor festival. But it gets kinkier. I was also working at the time for a drug dealer, because as a transvestite I can make deliveries without too much hassle since most people find me creepy anyway. They tend to back towards a wall whenever I show up. But this drug dealer told me I had to work that night. "Aw..." I said.

 

I was only 22, and fresh out of the suburbs. My tight white-Latino ass had not been punctured yet the way I wanted it to be and the way I hoped someday a strong man like James Hetfield might. My dealer was a corrupt Frenchman with a constant raging hardon, but he wasn't my type. Still he knew what he wanted and took it.

 

So on the night of the show I am wearing a red dress with a ninja star broach. My legs are shaved and I am recently washed with my makeup looking good. A place full of teenage hormones checking me out as a woman. It just about made me erect under the tape. I had 2 oz of cocaine and some extras for the guys in Metallica. They were supposed to find me by my broach. Finally a security guy led me backstage...

 

"What can we do for ya, lady?" said a resonably intoxicated James Hetfield as I walked into the room. In my best falsetto I said, "I am here bringing office supplies," looking around, wondering if they knew. "Yeah right, lady," said Lars with emphasis on the last two syllables. Before I knew it he had whipped my wig off, and torn open my dress.

 

"Of all silliness..." said James but then his eyes widened when I tossed him the giant package. "Well, I can understand that, anyway," he said. "Why're you dressed up like a girl?"

 

I couldn't say anything. Paralyzed with fear.

 

Finally Lars said, "Because he's a faggot."

 

"That's it," I said.

 

Lars fucking grabbed me again and I thought he was going to bite me but instead he was deep tonguing me, while Kirk and Jason unpeeled the rest of my dress and licked my mancherry ring. I could hear James getting lubed up in the background, and sighed as Lars grabbed my throbbing cock. He handed it to Kirk who began palming it while wearing a creepy trenchcoat like all the guys hanging out near the boy's locker room at the YMCA. Lars forced me to my knees, and shoved his earnest 4" manhood into my waiting mouth.

 

I gulped and slurped while a painful ramming from behind let me knowthat Jason was trying my ass with some guacamole for lubricant.

 

"URRRGGGHHH!!!" I moaned as Lars fired his searing milk into my throat, gagging on the salty congealing mucus. At the same time Jason suddenly squealed and from the strange pressure in my ass I realized he was filling it. My 7" member fully erect, I was getting mouthed by Kirk who had a bag of candy and a Tickle Me Elmo doll also. Jason collapsed into a corner.

 

Now I thought, maybe it's my turn on the sweet round ass of Lars, but instead I was roughly turned about and flung over a couch as a massive 9" erect James Hetfield strode over to me. "Boy, you ARE going to be a woman when I am through." It was the most painful anal battering of my life, but I could not stop shrieking my delight as he probed far into my inmost essence.

 

They had to go play a show after that so I hung out and took PCP with their trained dwarf gimp until they got sick of the crowd and came back to the hotel room. In a fog of drugs and alcohol, I got fucked by Lars and Jaymz all night long, satisfied Newstead twice and got free UnderRoos from Kirk. I couldn't believe how long my ass bled the next day but it's a night I never will forget!!

[Corey_Lazarus 0]

...what's with the trend of taking fucked up erotica and replacing the character's names with either members of the board or celebrities?

[Guest Vitamin X]

See, I'm pissed because the Ozzfest I REALLY wanted to go to was `04, but it got outright cancelled by Hurricane Jeanne, who came with a weaksauce Category 1 or 2 and just dumped a bunch of rain and little damage throughout SoFla.

 

This is almost exactly like the same lineup when I went to see Ozzfest the last time (the last time SOAD headlined), also including that there's maybe about only two other bands I want to see on the bill (maybe Lacuna, but I heard they suck live, as well as Strapping Young Lad).

 

Ever since the "death" of nu-metal, we've been getting shit on with these "emo-metal" bands like Avenged Sevenfold and Atreyu, and god they're all so incredibly awful. I guess there'll always be a horrible trend in metal.

[Hawk 34 0]

Speaking of old music festival tours, how does Warped Tour look?

 

What are the better tours this summer besides the oft-mentioned Slayer tour.

[Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye 0]

Demilich

 

* May 27th: Baltimore, MD, with Vital Remains etc. - Maryland Death Fest at Sonar

* May 31st: New York, NY, with Biolich, Electro Quarterstaff and Funebrarum - at North Six

* June 3rd: Austin, TX, with Averse Sefira, Biolioch, and Spliteye - venue TBA

* June 4th: Houston, TX, with Averse Sefira, Biolich, and Spliteye - venue TBA

* June 6th: El Paso, TX, with Biolich, Reign in Terror and Demonology - at CHIC's

* June 7th: Glendale, AZ, with Biolich (local bands TBA) - at Bulldogz

* June 9th: San Diego, CA, with Biolich (local bands TBA) - at The Jumping Turtle

* June 10th: Los Angeles, CA - other bands and the venue TBA

 

After getting back to Finland, we'll play the last gig in Kuopio. The band will split up then.

 

http://www.anentity.com/demilich/

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

Electro Quarterstaff?

[tekcop 0]

Demilich

 

* May 27th: Baltimore, MD, with Vital Remains etc. - Maryland Death Fest at Sonar

 

http://www.anentity.com/demilich/

I really, really want to go to this show. If not just to see Demilich live once before they break up.

[Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye 0]

There's a ton of pretty lame bands on that fest though, do a weekend trip to Texas and see them along with the mighty mighty fucking mighty Averse Sefira

[tekcop 0]

OK. A lot of those bands do suck. But it has Necrophagist, and I love me some Necrophagist.

[Rendclaw 0]

(The Czech Republic @ Mar 17 2006, 10:53 PM) *

 

Rick Rubin?!? bahahahaha. Metallica is fading fast.

 

 

I fail to see how Rick Rubin can be a step down from Bob Rock, but ok.

 

What happend to Bob Rock?

 

 

Rock is working with Motley Crue on their album and "unable due to time restraints to fulfill his commitment to Metallica as well" or something political to that effect that basically says they realised they needed a change badly. Rock always seemed like a nice guy but someone more suited to make pop-rock then metal. I think if nothing else Rubin will challange them more than they've been in over a decade and I'm very excited to hear the results.

 

Likewise, but Metallica had better hit a home run with this album, or that is all she wrote for them. Some already feel that way, I'm sure. I always thought that they should gone in a different direction for producer after The Black Album. Load wasn't bad, but it was way too radical a change for the band that was supposedly a standard-bearer for the genre back in those days. Re-Load and St. Anger, no need to even comment.

 

If Rick Rubin can recapture even *some* of what made Metallica what it was, then its all good.

 

My one indication that I have my doubts about Metallica is James' singing voice now. The growl in his voice was trademark, but now he just wails... not good, Mav.

[2GOLD 0]

Speaking of old music festival tours, how does Warped Tour look?

 

What are the better tours this summer besides the oft-mentioned Slayer tour.

 

At the moment, Warped looks very eh. Most of the top bands aren't bothering, electing to do tours of their own instead of the big one. Last year's line-up was pretty strong considering and only a few of the bands seemed out of their league. It's weird knowing Avenged and Aetryu are going from Warped to Ozzfest, that's just really silly.

[Corey_Lazarus 0]

Well, to be fair, A7X only attracts the Warped Tour crowds because they dress like they all just came from an Antichrist-era Manson show, which is the "style" again these days (back then it was stupid, now it's cool...I get it). I fail to see how expensive shirts and ties torn up a little bit are "hardcore" or "punk rock," but hey...I also fail to see how a store that says Tinkerbell pillowcases is "punk rock," or a band that sells out stadiums constantly can still be labelled "punk rock."

 

Warped Tour is good in the sense that their main acts are the ones that they know will attract the younger crowds, the ones who buy into the emo bullshit, and the older crowds (the more "true" punks) will be there to see the lesser-known and/or older bands. I know Valient Thorr is on Warped Tour again, so if any of you decide to go: find out what stage they're on. Uber-liberal rhetoric, but they're fucking insane live. Middle-aged, crazy, drunk, and they're "aliens." It's awesome. They nearly tour down the stage (literally: their road crew was hammered and having fun so they started swinging from the support beams and shaking the whole stage as a couple of things fell over) last year, and I can only expect they'll do the same this year.

[tominator89 0]

So, I see Avenged Sevenfold and DragonForce are added to the main stage.

 

http://ozzfest.com/bands.html