Im going to need some advice..

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

I wanted to start a thread about this outside of the damn Virgin thread..basically all the backstory you need is in that thread although what pertains to this is on the last page.

 

Adelle and I exchanged IMs each other for a couple of days before she tells me that she's going to LA For 2 weeks. I just did find out that she went out there because thats where her parents live (which is where this is heading towards the end). like I said I was worried that she'd I probably wouldn't hear from her again, but oddly she sent me the first email once she got to LA and since then I've probably gotten about a 8 or 9 more emails, just about one every day ranging from just a brief message to some actual discussion. She's actually been pretty open about talking about herself, which sorta worries me..She's told me her name (first/middle only), a description of herself (which fits the picture thing, and I was at first skeptical about it, but given how open shes been Im thinking shes not fibbing), the fact that her family is Irish, she likes "scary movies", her favorite food is Chinese Lo Mein (which I have already offered to cook for her any time she wants it..), she drinks too much Irish Coffee (I dont know about this, but I will eventually offer to make her an Irish Kiss which is ]Bailey's, Kahlua and Coffee with whipped cream on top), she took french in high school and speaks it whenever shes angry..theres a bit more but you get the idea. I've told her some things about myself, including a description (which made me happy that after that she still is emailing me back) and a few other odd things, but not nearly as much as she has.

 

Anyway, she sent me an email on thursday..and she finally told me that she was coming back on Wednesday. But.. (this is where the parents thing comes back in) she basically said that her parents weren't happy with her being all the way here in MD by herself. I was really worried about how to respond to this..I am hardly the one to be giving advice on relationships with parents , but what I said basically boiled down to "Your parents should be able to respect your decisions as an adult, you are 21 not 12, but at least be thankful you have parents who obviously care about you instead of cutting you loose and not caring.."

 

Anyway, I still have no idea why she moved out here, of all places to my small little town , but I got an email from her email this morning, and I got her semi-response on my advice..

 

"its kinda sad leaving you know? But oh well Md was my choice and the choice remains."

 

I'm sorta worried. I was all excited about the prospects of meeting her, as she seems like a really awesome person and yet..it looks like when she gets back here..from what I read into that message, that while she wants to be back here now, she might not feel that way in a few weeks/months. I really dont want to get involved with her on any level (be there sex or not) only to have her bail on me in a couple months..which is truly what I see happening.

 

I really..really..really wish I could end up in a situation that was just plain and simple..

[Stephen Joseph 0]

You're emailing and not calling?

 

Dude, there's no chance there.

 

How about you not get into such a situation. Don't accept anything that isnt somewhat simple

[HollywoodSpikeJenkins 0]

Tip drill the bitch.

[Open the Muggy Gate 0]

If this was gamefaqs, I would say...

 

PEE IN HER BUTT! ROFFLE MY WAFFLES!

 

My advice... get to know her more, and see what's making her tick. See if she really wants to leave and all that shit. If she cares for ya, she won't want to leave.

[Guest Princess Leena]

If you're looking for a long-termrelationship... this isn't the type of girl you want, for now. She's completely unsettled in her life. Still talk to her... it doesn't sound like you have much a relationship at the moment, so be friends. Look for some more local, grounded girls in the meantime.

[naiwf 0]

My advice... get to know her more, and see what's making her tick. See if she really wants to leave and all that shit. If she cares for ya, she won't want to leave.

 

They haven't even met yet from what I've gathered. I don't think he's going to make her want to stay when he hasn't even made her want to meet for coffee or something benign like that. He's only going to get burned if he thinks he has the ability to change her direction in life, especially given the fact it's likely she'll be bolting at the first sign of trouble anyway.

[MrRant 0]

Tip drill the bitch.

 

Be sure to mail that royalty check on Monday.

[EricMM 0]

This is why the net isn't a good place to meet chicks, because it's not local enough.

 

Where the hell in MD are you from?

 

There has got to be a good spot to meet girls where you are.

 

There just has to be.

[Open the Muggy Gate 0]

 

My advice... get to know her more, and see what's making her tick. See if she really wants to leave and all that shit. If she cares for ya, she won't want to leave.

 

They haven't even met yet from what I've gathered. I don't think he's going to make her want to stay when he hasn't even made her want to meet for coffee or something benign like that. He's only going to get burned if he thinks he has the ability to change her direction in life, especially given the fact it's likely she'll be bolting at the first sign of trouble anyway.

 

Well what I am saying is he needs to meet her out in a public place instead of behind an IM name. That's why I put out the advice of getting to know her more. You learn a hell of a lot more about a person when you see them in person instead of a computer.

[naiwf 0]

Well what I am saying is he needs to meet her out in a public place instead of behind an IM name. That's why I put out the advice of getting to know her more. You learn a hell of a lot more about a person when you see them in person instead of a computer.

 

And I'm saying that if he can't convince her to meet in person, he shouldn't be worried about her leaving to go back to LA. He shouldn't be emotionally invested in someone that he hasn't sat across from yet, and from what I gathered by his choice of words doesn't even know what he looks except via a description that he was very much worried about. This dude is gonna get hurt by a chick that he knows nothing about, and he wonders why he ends up in this situation regularly.

[EricMM 0]

You really REALLY shouldn't care about someone you haven't even kissed, hugged, whatever.

 

Just saying.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

This is why the net isn't a good place to meet chicks, because it's not local enough.

 

Where the hell in MD are you from?

 

There has got to be a good spot to meet girls where you are.

 

There just has to be.

 

Well see I thought I was doing well by finding someone that actually lived in the same small rinky dink town as I do. I really want to know what in the world would possess someone to move from LA to here..Im thinking the only logical explanation is the college but she hasn't said anything about being in college (although it would make some sense..).

 

A few other things..reason why I haven't asked for a phone number is because I only got to IMing her for a couple days before she went out to LA so I dont know if she has a cell phone or not, but Im not paying long distance and I wouldn't want her to either.

 

No, we haven't met yet but I still have every intention of meeting her at some point, probably next weekend. Of all things, we got to talking about Ice cream and I mentioned that a Cold Stone Creamery opened last week and she said that would be a fun place to go..although I've been there and theres no place to sit in the place so Im not sure..but the ice cream is good.

 

As far as naiwf said that Im trying to change her direction in life..thats really the complete opposite..I dont want her to stay here because of me and if she were to ever say that she did want to go back I wouldn't try to stop her. But Im not really worried about that being a factor. I dont think anyone would make such a drastic decision in their life based on someone they've never even met before. I am more worried about there being problems between her and her parents..which is worse because I know of a few people who've had the same problem and their lives have turned out for shit because they tried to be all "I don't need your help, I can take care of myself" and then they went out with that attitude and got theirselves in trouble in one way or another.

 

And yeah, silly me for caring about someone I've never met before. Actually, I guess given the outcomes of the past 3 meetings I've had with people I've met via this same method, I shouldn't be so stupid but this experience has been so completely 180 from the others that until this I had convinced myself that this would end up working..but obviously like I said, nothing is ever simple for me.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

Needless to say..I dont think I have to worry about any of it anymore.

 

I guess I was right.

[EricMM 0]

Don't meet girls online.

[Guest Princess Leena]

Meeting people online CAN work. Just make sure they live reasonably close to you, in order to save lots of aggravation.

[geniusMoment 0]

So, what happened?

[k thx 0]

Any attachment to someone you've spoken to a few time on the net isn't real emotional attachment. Empathy maybe, but nothing more.

 

If she's worth anything she wouldn't be hitting on guys on the net. And I'm guessing her description/photos were a total lie and she's probably realised she can't go through with it.

[Murmuring Beast 0]

I don't see why people get involved or allowed themselves to get involved in internet scenarios. It can only end in massive disappointment for both parties as the internet is such a great guise for flaw.

[Stephen Joseph 0]

What happened was that once again my so-called Czech itemed "alpha male" statement turned out to be true.

 

Remember folks, if something keeps happening in your life, its not them, its YOU

[EricMM 0]

Mmm, I would say that meeting people online isn't a good way to start. Like, if you're used to the game, it's just another place to meet girls, create hookups, what have you. Who was it that posted about that Jeff Hardy girl, Carnival?

 

He's obviously been around the block once or twice.

 

It is NOT, however, where you should be going to meet your first girl.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

I've pretty much decided that Im going to lay off messing around much more with online dating.

 

Plus, especially after wasting over 2 weeks of my life on this most recent one, its just not worth it. I managed to deal with and get over meeting an obvious drug addict , a woman who was engaged and most likely already cheating and the enormously overweight girl, but I managed to do that because I hadn't invested as much time through email/phone calls with them before I met em. But, when I do put some time and effort in and get my hopes up because I didn't exactly rush into meeting someone..and I feel that shes a decent person and as a bonus "lives" near me, the person turns out to be a fake...

 

For the record, I decied to send her an email last night after I posted my first reply and unintentionally caught her in a lie (the whole fact that she was in MD at any point). When I mentioned that I knew she was lying about something (not specific), she deleted her profile that I found her through and without saying so, I can tell she has me on ignore/block/spam or whatever you call it.

[HollywoodSpikeJenkins 0]

Meeting someone online isn't THAT bad. I met the girl I'm seeing on MySpace, but we also go to the same college and we just never ran into each other until I found her on MySpace.

 

As long as you don't over do it or live to far away, it's all good.

[alfdogg 0]

My advice:

 

[EricMM 0]

Again, where do you live in MD

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

Again, where do you live in MD

 

Outside of Salisbury. If you've ever been to Ocean City you've gone through the small little town I live in because its on both sides of Rt 50 but you'd never know it aside from one silly little sign that most people ignore. Salisbury is fine if you like to go to sports bars or places where they play country music, but mostly you have to go to Ocean City for everything else. And Ocean City is fine now..but I really hate it in the summer...

[EricMM 0]

well there has to be bars in OC, right?

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

Uh..yeah.

[Guest Princess Leena]

Why won't you go to bars.

[MarvinisaLunatic 0]

I go to the sports bars in Salisbury a lot..so I can make fun of all their giant plasma screens and them not having HD setups to show HD on them..

 

Plus my taste for alcohol pretty much only goes as far as Smirnoff Ice. Which I've been told is not exactly the best thing for a guy to be seen drinking..

[Hawk 34 0]

I go to the sports bars in Salisbury a lot..so I can make fun of all their giant plasma screens and them not having HD setups to show HD on them..

 

That is a productive use of time.