chirs3 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 (edited) The Smartmark's Wrestling Federation Presents... SWF BATTLEGROUND! LIVE, SUNDAY, APRIL 23rd, FROM THE SOLD OUT ALLTELL STADIUM IN JACKSONVILLE, FLORIDA! (7:00pm PST, 10:00pm EST; check local listings) Send everything to: chirs3 COMMENTATORS: The winner of the Replacement Kommentator Kontest, MAK FRANCIS, will be in the booth alongside the everlovin' Suicide King! OFFICIAL THEME MUSIC: "War", by Edwin Starr. SET DESIGN: VIETNAM~! The set around the Entryway will look somewhat like an American camp - tents, jeeps, and two American flags on either side of the top of the ramp. As you move closer to the ring, we shift to a village, blown up and burned down, like this. Smoke, everywhere. A few bodies, too. For the main event - and ONLY the main event - the competitors will be choppered in to the arena. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- THE MAIN EVENT SWF World Heavyweight Championship Match JJ Johnson vs. Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix ---> Landon Maddix had been named the #1 Contender to the World Title, and he was set to go on to Battleground and face Wes Davenport. Slight problem: DAVENPORT PLAYED US. We got Punk'd. In a scramble to get a PPV Main Event put together in time, the SWF staff reviewed recent events - a few weeks ago, JJ Johnson had won the right to face Wes at Battleground by besting the SWF's head of security, Janus. No small feat, to be sure. Peters was less than willing to make good on JJ's shot, handing it to Landon instead, but now that the Champion's seat is empty, Johnson gets his shot after all. It certainly doesn't hurt that these two have history, either... Rules: Canadian Death Match! First man to score a cumulative 10-count over his opponent wins! Pinfalls of 3 or higher are counted, and submissions count for 3. Send to: Evolution -=-=-=-=-=- STREET FIGHT "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins vs. Zyon ---> The history between these two is long and spotty. They've been successful apart in singles competition, successful together as a tag team, and it seemed like they would be set to take the SWF by storm. But they began to fall out - bad blood over the Cruiserweight Championship, and their inability to take the Clusterfuck and the tag team titles... they began to blame each other, and before you knew it, Team SpYon fell apart just as quickly as they came together... ... but that wasn't the end. Zyon would not let well enough alone, and he awoke a monster in Spike Jenkins - a monster that, in recent weeks, has been attacking him left and right! The SWF staff has had its hands full trying to keep this two apart, but it's obvious that such a thing will not happen. There's only one way to settle this, and no, it's not in the ring. Rules: Street Fight Rules~! Send to: janusd -=-=-=-=-=- SWF International Championship Match Wildchild © vs. Jimmy the Doom ---> Jimmy the Doom pulled out a very impressive win against Kevin Coyote on Smarkdown, and earned a crack at the reigning International Champion, the Wildchild! Dub-Cee has taken down all comers so far, but I don't think he's ever had the... unique... challenge that Jimmy the Doom presents. Rules: Standard singles match. Send to: realitycheck -=-=-=-=-=- GRUDGE MATCH Bruce Blank vs. Insane Luchadore ---> Bruce Blank and Insane Luchadore have been dancing around each other for over a month now. What once was a simple spat over the title has now been blown up to beyond epic proportions - this ain't about the belt anymore. One of the most heated rivalries in recent memory will finally come to a head at Battleground, as the self-proclaimed King of Ultraviolence takes on the man who embodies the very meaning of Hardcore. Predicting a winner is damn near impossible, but there's one thing we can all be certain of - neither man will be the same after this. Rules: Ironman Match - 30 minute limit... inside this thing: Send to: Justice -=-=-=-=-=- SWF CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP - AIR RAID MATCH "The Divine Wind" Akira Kaibatsu © vs. Grendel vs. Stryke vs. Austin Sly ---> Akira Kaibatsu has been a one-man wrecking machine... or, if you replace "wrecking machine" with "guy who defends his title a lot", that works better. But defending against just one opponent is so passe... let's do four at once! Rules: Steel Poles extend up from the turnbuckles 20 feet high. Steel cables attached to the poles run across the center and form a giant X. The Cruiserweight title is suspended above the ring, hanging from the X formed. To win, you must obtain the belt. Ladders are permitted, but may not be used to grab the belt. Other than that, no disqualifications. If two men grab the belt and both hold on after falling to the mat, they are co-champions. Send to: chirs3 -=-=-=-=-=- Amy Stephens © vs. Megan Skye ---> Hell hath no fury... fuck that. That saying gets used way too much around here when we have a women's match. We need another saying. In the mean time, let's all laugh at Landon for being in the middle of this mess! Haha! After reuniting with his manager, Megan Skye, Landon neglected to visit his little Amy-poo in the hospital, and the resulting falling out led to Joseph Peters signing this match! A lingerie pillowfight seemed a little too over the top, so these two hellcats will tear it up in a fully sanctioned wrasslin' match! Rules: Standard singles match. Send to: Justice -=-=-=-=-=- Jay Hawke vs. Manson © ---> Jay Hawke ain't a happy customer. After wrestling Landon Maddix to a time-limit draw, he is shunned, kicked to the curb in favor of Landon Maddix and JJ Johnson. Hawke may be getting a second run for the World Title when this is all over, but for now, we've got to find a way for him to work out his aggression. The answer? Stick him against JJ's tag team partner. Rules: Standard singles match. Send to: chirs3 -=-=-=-=-=- Let's Get Everyone Booked II! - THIS TIME IT'S PERSONAL Michael Cross vs. Sean Davis Rules: Submission match - first man to make his opponent say the magic words (or tap the magic fingers, I suppose) wins. Send to: realitycheck -=-=-=-=-=- Let's Get Everyone Booked! David Cross vs. Christian Fury Rules: Standard singles match. Send to: janusd -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Apologies to the first two matches, as I didn't want to do a "random fourway" (I have my reasons). If you guys want some stips, just say the word, and I'll toss 'em in. I'll do my best to try and get you all something good for AftershoxXXXxXXXxXXxxxXXX and Lockdown. Edited April 21, 2006 by chirs3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Smartly Pretty 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 I'M ON MY WAY I'M MAKING IT BATTLEGROUND Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. S£im Citrus 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 Note to Drea: a small but possibly relevant change has been made to my stats ( I added the Figure-Four to my moveset ). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Evolution Report post Posted April 18, 2006 Raynor. I love you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
muzz 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 World Title match is going to be awesome because two of the best writers in the fed will go hard to win it, providing a fantastic match. Both deserve their spots, without question. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 I can never tell if Muzz is being sarcastic or not. JJ, stats are updated. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hank Kingsley 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 Special guest ring announcer: R. Lee Emery. Also: I can't mark, because I'm going to be working all day/hungover from prom parties. Apologies! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. S£im Citrus 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 Hell no; no way could I pull that off. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toxxic 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 Who's R. Lee Emery? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toxxic 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 Another question? If the CW limit is 230lbs, why is Sly wrestling for the title when he's 237lbs? I know you hate me. Shush. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chirs3 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 The Cruiserweight Fairy left a note under my pillow telling me to raise the limit to 237. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toxxic 0 Report post Posted April 18, 2006 Maybe she should leave a message under Sly's telling him to lose weight fast. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JHawk 0 Report post Posted April 19, 2006 Maybe Sly could run the Bobby Heenan AWA angle where he keeps winning the title only for the announcement that he failed to make weight. Gold, I tell ya! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JJ Johnson 0 Report post Posted April 19, 2006 The Cruiserweight Fairy left a note under my pillow telling me to raise the limit to 237. Like hell I did. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Smartly Pretty 0 Report post Posted April 19, 2006 There's a new cruiserweight fairy in town, bitch! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hank Kingsley 0 Report post Posted April 19, 2006 R. Lee Emery is notorious for playing Gunnery Sgt. Hartman in Stanley Kubrick's Full Metal Jacket. Look up the quotes on IMDB, totally worth it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angel_Grace_Blue 0 Report post Posted April 19, 2006 I'll settle this. Both of you are fairies. Prancing, pixie-winged, tutu-clad, wand waving, fairies. Totally heterosexual, 100%, though. Yes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sly 0 Report post Posted April 19, 2006 I have no idea what you all are talking about. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
the.weej 0 Report post Posted April 19, 2006 The card has been edited with the addition of the official commentating team, to reflect the results of the recent poll. Enjoy! -Z Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted April 19, 2006 What percentage of limp mobility does Mak have? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Toxxic 0 Report post Posted April 19, 2006 Ah, thought I knew the name from somewhere. And if anyone has a claim to being the Cruiserweight Fairy then, as the only person on here who runs a gay clubnight, I feel I pwn j00 awl. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
