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TWIB #4: now to the end of the month


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Guest Felonies!
Posted

:bubbles:

 

 

Maybe Houston will play a fuckin' road game this week.

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Posted
:bubbles:

 

 

Maybe Houston will play a fuckin' road game this week.

 

Hmmm...consulting my 2006 Houston Astros Schedule Mousepad, we play Cincy the 28th-30th, followed by 2 at Millwaukee May 1st and 2nd. May is pretty much all road games, though. Maybe the Cubs can get through this week without having to call up any minor leaguers due to injuries.

Guest Felonies!
Posted

Actually, we just called up minor-leaguer Angel Guzman because Jerome Williams has a "fucking sucks."

Posted

Actually, we just called up minor-leaguer Angel Guzman because Jerome Williams has a "fucking sucks."

Even if it was true, it still wouldn't be as good as Runelys Hernandez hitting the DL due to a "lack of stamina."

 

 

I think I heard that there was an article written somewhere....perhaps the Houston Chronicle that talked about how fatasses make better pitchers....something about Body Mass Index. They specifically mentioned Hernandez. I heard about it in passing from the announcers on the Astros game today. I shall see if I can procure it.

Posted

Actually, we just called up minor-leaguer Angel Guzman because Jerome Williams has a "fucking sucks."

Even if it was true, it still wouldn't be as good as Runelys Hernandez hitting the DL due to a "lack of stamina."

 

 

I think I heard that there was an article written somewhere....perhaps the Houston Chronicle that talked about how fatasses make better pitchers....something about Body Mass Index. They specifically mentioned Hernandez. I heard about it in passing from the announcers on the Astros game today. I shall see if I can procure it.

 

I think Clemens proved this.

Posted

Keith Hernandez has come under fire for flipping out at the presence of a woman in the Padres dugout last night. I actually caught about 3 minutes of the game and saw the entire diatribe.

 

I'd imagine at one point, he thought about what he was about to say and said "Fuck it, I'm Keith Hernandez."

Posted

And I have found it. It was in the NY times.

 

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/04/23/sports/b...=rssnyt&emc=rss

 

Clemens isn't fat. He's just...thick. Bobby Jenks is fat.

 

I thought you meant the ass itself, because Clemens had a fat ass. Fatness, goes beyond the stomach region.

 

I refuse to engage in a discussion on the fatness/thickness of the ass of Roger "The Rocket" Clemens...at least until he returns the Houston Ass-tros.

Posted
Keith Hernandez has come under fire for flipping out at the presence of a woman in the Padres dugout last night. I actually caught about 3 minutes of the game and saw the entire diatribe.

 

I'd imagine at one point, he thought about what he was about to say and said "Fuck it, I'm Keith Hernandez."

 

I was just sitting there shaking my head during his whole ridiculous spiel. He actually had the nerve to say a few innings later that he stood by his comments and that anyone offended should get a sense of humor.

Guest Smues
Posted

Three run homer from Betemit gives the Braves a 3-1 lead. Can we hold it for two innings I don't know but that was a nice shot. Or if you're listening to Miller it's Wilson "beta meat".

Guest Felonies!
Posted

Jon Miller labors over pronouncing each and every Hispanic player's name right, but he stumbles through every other aspect of calling a ballgame.

 

"1, no, 2, no, 1 away"

Guest Princess Leena
Posted

Actually, we just called up minor-leaguer Angel Guzman because Jerome Williams has a "fucking sucks."

Even if it was true, it still wouldn't be as good as Runelys Hernandez hitting the DL due to a "lack of stamina."

 

He may need to win the Comeback Player of the Year award, to help his problem

Guest Felonies!
Posted

Why do lots of Hispanic baseball players have Norwegian surnames as first names? Wilson Betemit, Robinson Cano, Anderson Hernandez. Is this strictly Dominican? Because I don't see a lot of people named Robinson, white, Hispanic, or otherwise, hanging around.

Posted

Actually, we just called up minor-leaguer Angel Guzman because Jerome Williams has a "fucking sucks."

 

When are you gonna call up Pie? I hear he's good.

He needs to be playing every day. This isn't going to happen, unless someone in the outfield goes down. No sense in bringing him up, only to have him see less at-bats than Freddie Bynum. Might as well let him develop in the minors. Remember, being brought up before you're ready can have lasting effects. See Patterson, Corey.

 

I'm curious to see Guzman. I've been hearing about him for three years, figuring he'd be part of the rotation by now. He's hurt a lot, so he fits the bill of a Cubs starter.

Guest Smues
Posted

Remlinger gets the last out and Atlanta wins 3-1. Huzzah. Thanks Wilson Beta Meat!

Posted
I'm curious to see Guzman. I've been hearing about him for three years, figuring he'd be part of the rotation by now. He's hurt a lot, so he fits the bill of a Cubs starter.

 

Hey, if he goes down, I bet Neifi can pitch a couple innings. He's a hand. Any word from Cubbie land when the Glass Armed Duo should be back? I'm hoping it's in time for the 'Stros series. I really wanna see that epic Wandy Rodriguez-Mark Prior pitching duel.

Guest Felonies!
Posted
I think I heard that there was an article written somewhere....perhaps the Houston Chronicle that talked about how fatasses make better pitchers....something about Body Mass Index.

 

Okay, but what about Pedro Martinez? Guy's a twig. If the wind is blowing out at Wrigley, he's more likely to land out on Waveland than his own pitches.

Posted

 

I'm curious to see Guzman. I've been hearing about him for three years, figuring he'd be part of the rotation by now. He's hurt a lot, so he fits the bill of a Cubs starter.

 

Hey, if he goes down, I bet Neifi can pitch a couple innings. He's a hand. Any word from Cubbie land when the Glass Armed Duo should be back? I'm hoping it's in time for the 'Stros series. I really wanna see that epic Wandy Rodriguez-Mark Prior pitching duel.

They were talking about May, with Wood being a couple of weeks ahead of Prior. Of course, this was before it was reported Wood felt a tweak in the shoulder the other day to the surprise of probably no one.

Posted

 

I'm curious to see Guzman. I've been hearing about him for three years, figuring he'd be part of the rotation by now. He's hurt a lot, so he fits the bill of a Cubs starter.

 

Hey, if he goes down, I bet Neifi can pitch a couple innings. He's a hand. Any word from Cubbie land when the Glass Armed Duo should be back? I'm hoping it's in time for the 'Stros series. I really wanna see that epic Wandy Rodriguez-Mark Prior pitching duel.

They were talking about May, with Wood being a couple of weeks ahead of Prior. Of course, this was before it was reported Wood felt a tweak in the shoulder the other day to the surprise of probably no one.

 

So, have you heard anything lately about Wade Miller? Is he scheduled to come back anytime soon? If the Cubs get back Wood, Prior, and Miller, that rotation with Zambrano and Maddog would be killer, at least for a couple weeks until Wood, Prior, and Miller get injured again.

Guest StylesMark
Posted

The Yankees win/loss records for night games is disturbing, to say the least.

 

I'm guessing they prefer day games so they can get to Old Country Buffet for the early bird???

Posted

I do want to add that if given the choice, I'd probably keep Jerome Williams over Glendon Rusch. Williams is unpredictable, but there's still more upside. It's incredible the way the team's crapped on him all while treating Glendon so well, presumably for his 2004 season.

Posted

The perception on Williams, IIRC, is that he's overweight and that he isn't assertive around the plate at all. He nibbles constantly, when he should be attacking the strike zone with something that actually have some sort of movement on it.

 

Rusch isn't much better, but it's obvious that they aren't content with using Williams for many innings in the pros, so why not ship him to the minors to work on something? Maybe he can add another pitch, like a cut fastball or a two-seamer, that will actually allow him to pitch with the element of surprise, rather than living or dying by his location.

Guest Felonies!
Posted

Rusch nor Williams look very good right now, but at least Rusch got the win he needed with his back to the wall, whereas Williams--in an identical back-to-the-wall situation--Rick Vaughned his way through 2 innings and got himself shipped out to Des Moines. They knew the ramifications of those starts, one rose to the occasion and pitched passably, one didn't. Hopefully we won't have to figuratively have Glendon at gunpoint just to eat up innings like a good #5, but I'd rather have him in the rotation than Rich Hill.

Posted

Williams' was better than Rusch in the Pittsburgh series, but came out on the short end of the stick since the Cubs only scored one run, unlike the seven they scored the next day for Glendon.

 

Tony Womack's been designated for assignment, which makes you wonder why the Reds even bothered.

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