I have an announcement.

[Slayer]

Slayer, get on it.

You're not the boss of me

[Big Ol' Smitty]

I'm thinking of changing my sig. Which one of these should I use?

 

 

 

[Guest Princess Leena]

I should use the 2nd one.

[Guest Felonies!]

I'm thinking of changing my sig. Which one of these should I use?

 

 

 

Oh man, that site must be a fuckin' treasure trove. (EDIT: It is.) I gotta check it out. In the meantime,

 

One big girl with tattoos and a heavy-diapered infant wears a t-shirt that says "WARNING: I GO FROM ZERO TO HORNEY IN 2.5 BEERS." Have you ever wondered where these particular types of unfunny shirts come from? The ones that say things like "HORNEY IN 2.5" or "Impeach President Clinton...AND HER HUSBAND TOO!"? Mystery solved. They come from State Fair Expos. This booth seems integral, somehow. The seamiest fold of the Midwestern underbelly. The Lascaux Caves of a certain rural mentality. "40 Isn't Old...IF YOU'RE A TREE" and "The More Hair I Lose, The More Head I Get" and "Retired: No Worries, No Paycheck" and "I Fight Poverty...I WORK!" As with New Yorker cartoons, there's an elusive sameness about the messages. A lot serve to ID the wearer as part of a certain group and then congratulate that group for its sexual dynamism--"Coon Hunters Do It All Night" and "Hairdressers Tease It Till It Stands Up" and "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy." Some presume a weird kind of aggressive relation between the wearer and the reader--"We'd Get Along Better...IF YOU WERE A BEER" and "What Part of NO Don't You Understand?" There's something complex and compelling about the fact that these messages are not just uttered but worn, like they're a badge or a credential. The message compliments the wearer somehow, and the wearer in turn endorses the message by spreading it across his chest, which fact is then in further turn supposed to endorse the wearer as a person of plucky or risque wit. It's also meant to cast the wearer as an Individual, the sort of person who not only makes but wears a Personal Statement. What's depressing is that the statements are not only preprinted and mass-produced, but so dumbly unfunny that they serve to place the wearer squarely in that large and unfortunate group of people who think such messages not only Individual but funny. It all gets terribly complex and depressing.

[Carnival]

haha oh god....White Trash T-Shirt Heaven!

 

reminds me of the sassy keychains with phrases on them that are near the counter at many convenience stores.

 

[Art Sandusky]

 

It might be time for a name change.

[Sideburnious]

The only "White trash" T-shirt I ever got was the ford symbol/with fuct for the writing, but that was more because of Zack de la Rocha wearing one. That and I was 15.

[k thx]

 

I don't get their high brow humour.

[Art Sandusky]

You guys do realize that people actually wear these, right. Then again, I see a lot more of these down in this part of the country. I blame daytime talk shows.

[Sideburnious]

Speaking of the collision of daytime tv and white trash, I'd love a Jerry Springer security shirt.

[Guest Felonies!]

David Cross also addresses these shirts on SUYFB!, but you're not getting two transcriptions out of me in one day. Basically, he says the South has more irony in its t-shirts than anywhere else, evidenced by poor fat people wearing shirts like "I'm a lucky devil!" and "God don't make no trash!"

[Hoff]

:wub:

 

I thought about mentioning when my cycle started, but we were just starting the coversing, and I won't be in the area (Twin Cities) until the end of June..

 

Make sure you hit up Valleyfair

[{''({o..o})''}]

Avoid the big ass mall though.

[Hoff]

If I'm feeling better I might go there tomorrow.

[{''({o..o})''}]

If you get on aim, you'll get the exclusive pictures of Piss.

[Hoff]

Too good a deal to pass up.

 

TSA (whoa, creepy!), I see you reading the thread, you BETTER do what I tell you or I'll find you. I run this city.

[Hoff]

WTF? Come on, girl. Maybe you've never been...

 

http://www.valleyfair.com/

 

One day, when I was a young lad, I rode the Wave like 40 times in a row. I love it. Corkscrew is still the best, though.

[Hoff]

Look at all the traffic this thread has gotten now that Valleyfair has been brought into play. FOUR VIEWERS.

 

EDIT: Three users. And where the hell did TSA go?

[alfdogg]

I've been to Valleyfair once...I think I was like 9 or 10. I rode Excalibur, can't remember if I rode the Corkscrew or not.

[Hoff]

WTF you were here? We could have hung out! Excalibur is decent, but I always think I'm gonna die when I ride it now. Plus Wild Thing is right there, Excalibur's not so necessary. It's faster, but there's less to it.

 

You'd REMEMBER Corkscrew, especially if you were 10.

[alfdogg]

I never lived there, my mom has two sisters that live up there. I don't ride roller coasters anymore...I don't know how I rode them when I was a kid, I've always been afraid of heights. The log flume is about as adventerous as it gets for me anymore.

[Open the Muggy Gate]

Going back to the white trash T-shirt discussion, I did see two shirts at a flea market one time that I liked. The first said "For my next trick, I need a condom and a volunteer." The second one, the front said "Practical Joke: Check the Back". The back said "Fooling Someone: Check the Front".

[MarvinisaLunatic]

The National Alopecia Areata (not what I have but anyway) Foundation Convention is in Minneapolis June 29th-July 2nd at the Hyatt Regency..

 

I thought about going when I heard about it but its mostly for kids and their parents..plus I probably couldnt afford going anyway. $200 a person not including lodging or airfair although it includes tickets to a Twins game on the 30th. Most of the activities like I said are geared towards kids or their parents..

[Paul Stanley]

I work at the big ass mall at the big ass aquarium.

[Guest The Satanic Angel]

Been to Valley Fair.. wouldn't mind going again.

 

I'd love to go with Paul..

[MrRant]

[Paul Stanley]

Been to Valley Fair.. wouldn't mind going again.

 

I'd love to go with Paul..

 

 

Really? That'd be cool. I like the bumper cars.

[Paul Stanley]

 

 

I WANT TO KNOW WHAT LOVE ISSSS

 

I WANT YOU TO SHOW MEEEE

[Guest The Satanic Angel]

I WANT TO FEEL WHAT LOVE ISSSS..

 

I KNOW YOU CAN SHOW MEEE..

[Your Paragon of Virtue]

Wait, what the hell is going on? When did all this happen?

 

So are you guys, gonna like, fuck?

 

Marvin, you shoulda jumped on her when you had the chance. She's willing to travel through God knows how many states to get laid with someone she met online, who, even worse, is a Kiss fan. If that's not desperation I don't know what is.