Thoth 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 (edited) My computer is on the fritz, so I'm on a loaner. The show lacks descriptions, but I think you can make it work. (Z's note: All fixed by MEEEEE~! All matches are singles matches unless noted) SWF LOCKDOWN - JUNE 23rd Due Date: Wednesday, 8pm EST Venue: THE KINGDOME in Fargo, North Dakota. I urge someone to dig up the history on the Kingdome, just so I don't have to/the joke gets explained. Send Shit To: 5_moves_of_doom Main Event Non-Title Bout; Special Guest Referee Dace Night vs Janus Special Guest Referee: Tom Flesher Dace and Tom fought for weeks to decide the rightful number one contender to the SWF World Heavyweight Championship, but in an ironic twist, Dace will be the first one to face Janus (in a non-title setting, naturally). However, just to be fair, Tom has been asked to mediate this competition. After all, if neither of them have anything to lose, what's the harm? Rules: Standard singles match. Tom may write if he wishes. Word Limit: 6000 Send To: chirs3 Cruiserweight Title Match Austin Sly vs Johnny Dangerous Johnny defends the crusierweight title against Austin Sly, who's been... well, Austin Sly as of late. But hey, Johnny's a fighting champion and he'll take all comers, and Austin is a more than capable opponent. Fight! Rules: Crusierweight rules. Word Limit: 5000 Send To: Thoth Submissions Match "Deathwish" Danny Williams vs Mike Van Siclen Three times a champion, and three times having lost the belt, Danny Williams is in very, very elite company. Unfortunately, neither of his title reigns have inspired the sheer dominance that El Luchadore Magnifico's or Rane's did, and Danny is very, very uhappy about that. In a chance to blow off some steam, the ever ready MVS laces up to face Danny in a submissions match which seems tailor made for the former champion... Rules: Submissions match. First person to make their opponent give up is the winner; there are no rules otherwise. Word Limit: 5000 Send To: chirs3 USJL Title Match Alan Clark vs Aecas vs Todd Cortez vs Masked Man In an epic Iron Man match, Alan Clark finally unsurped Landon Maddix for the USJL title, finally ending their long-standing feud. So, it seems only fitting that his first defence be an epic as well. He takes on four hungry competitors in the Black Angel, the Urban Legend, and... Sexual Maskosaurus... Rules: First pin wins. Word Limit: 5000 Send To: 5_moves_of_doom Toxxic vs "Hollywood" Spike Jenkins Toxxic beat Nathaniel Kibagami at the PPV, so you'd think he'd be set to face someone a little more prestigious than Holly, here... never the less, that's what's tabled, so this should be interesting. Word Limit: 5000 Send To: realitycheck Hardcore Title Contendership Ryan Dustin vs Munich vs Manson Manson challanges Annie's record for most returns to the SWF, and he's welcomed back with a contendership match and Ryan Dustin and Munich. Yeah... Rules: First pin wins. No rules otherwise. Word Limit: 4000 Send To: Suicide King Heath Black vs Martin "Big Country" Hunt Two n00blets. They rock each other's sox! w00t! Word Limit: 3500 Send To: Thoth Max King vs Petey The Irish Penguin I'm not even going to TRY to summarize Petey, so forget it. I'll just say he's facing another new guy here in, thankfully, a singles match. Word Limit: 3500 Send To: realitycheck Edited June 19, 2004 by realitycheck Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chuck Woolery 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 Uh... Okay. Do we have a marker? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thoth 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 I forgot to change the stip, sorry MVS. Marker add. PARA PARA is awesome. It is awesome love-love dance energy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Beingz0wningj00 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 Thoth you cunt worm Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Secret Agent 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 Where is this Lockdown going down at? Madison Square Garden, The Kingdom, ect? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A Happy Medium 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 damn the man, Jay...no really, you should have a match. Why don't we make this one from....the University of Wisconsin or something? We're in the area, and maybe we can make some badass Mayor McCheese references. Anyways, time to bring back the barbed wire hockey stick. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A Happy Medium 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 I meant Madison, by the way. The stadium is called the Kohl Center. Seats 17000 for basketball, so it's believable to have a show there. You know, so it spurs the imagination a tad. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Aecas Report post Posted June 19, 2004 Is our match normal Fatal Four Ways rules or elimination or what? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 Shockingly, lack of titles or descriptions has bred confusion! Dace/Janus is non-title, correct? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Aecas Report post Posted June 19, 2004 Gah well its all academic for me as I'm not going to have enough time to write for this one. I hope the other guys can make some sense of it. *shakes fist at real life* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheBostonStrangler 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 I declare every match is hereby contested under bra and panties rules unless specifically stated otherwise. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
the.weej 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 (edited) Alright... you'll note that I have exercised my DIVINE POWER~! and edited in tags, descriptions and a venue. Go me. As noted, if someone wants to dig up the info on the Kingdome, I would appreciate it. Sorry, JD, that's my fault for not editing you in to the roster. And as mentioned, I'll apologize for Thoth on the general disorganization of the card, as his computer was really, really giving him a shitfit, and he was running back and forth between his mom's laptop and his Mac. -Z Edited June 19, 2004 by realitycheck Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Golgo 13 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 The KINGDOME~ was erected as a tribute to the greatest heel of all time and former SWF Commissioner The Suicide King, aka Brain Applewhite, aka The King of Hearts. He's still working on getting the Sacramento Kings to move there. And I don't think I rival Annie in returns quite yet. Counting the number of times I've left for extended periods of time (month or more) and came back, I'm only up to four or five occasions. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 Annnnnd, a refresher on Cruiserweight Rules: Across the top, it says “Cruiserweight Rules.” “The first cruiserweight rule in effect tonight is: Twenty-count on the outside. Ordinarily the count-out is ten. However, cruiserweight matches have a twenty-count to allow for more dynamic action and dives to the outside.” The first rule flashes across the screen, quickly followed by, “No over-the-top.” “Also, throwing the opponent over the top rope will engender an immediate disqualification. These wrestlers are smaller than the heavyweights and can be lifted more easily, so to protect them from undue injury, we enforce this. And, finally…” The words “Bobby Riley sucks” flash across the screen. “My broadcast partner is mandated to suck for the duration of any and all cruiserweight matches. Ordinarily, I prepare for this inevitability by providing him with Jolly Ranchers or a lollipop – which he prefers, oddly enough – but I’ve unfortunately left my prep bag in the locker room tonight, so he’ll simply have to give poor commentary.” “One of these days, Comet… to the moon!” “I see you’re starting early, Robert. Good for you!” Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Ill One 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 You bitches better sell Petey the (Irish) Penguin and the Celtic Misfits! The summary is simple- Dillon burned his SJL contract that had a two year clause he couldn't return and he was the international Linux mascot. But he got fired and since Zed's a fuckin' dick comissioner he'd rather have Tim wrestle as Petey the (Irish) Penguin than be reinstated. Simple, right? Good luck to all. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 These wrestlers are smaller than the heavyweights and can be lifted more easily, so to protect them from undue injury, we enforce this Isn't it usually the cruiserweights who hit 18 different head-drop variations in a match and kick out from each one. ...aren't I one of the guys around here who writes those matches? *shuts up* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Ill One 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 I guess I'd qualify there, 'cause I had a midget no-sell a Burning Hammer in my match *plug*~! I never liked the "no over-the-top" rule anyway. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted June 19, 2004 These wrestlers are smaller than the heavyweights and can be lifted more easily, so to protect them from undue injury, we enforce this Isn't it usually the cruiserweights who hit 18 different head-drop variations in a match and kick out from each one. ...aren't I one of the guys around here who writes those matches? *shuts up* You can't apply logic to anything involving the Amazing Red. The point is, I had to come up with a justification for the rules I cribbed from WCW, so there. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thoth 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2004 God, I AM the worst booker the SWF ever had. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Ill One 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2004 Not until you try to win by a scoop slam and then book yourself in the main event, Thoth *coughs LDP* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Suicide King Report post Posted June 20, 2004 Kingdome? Rock. And since I own the arena, I can actually show up at a show for a change! Damned faces trying to keep a heel down. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A Happy Medium 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2004 Heh, I marked the scoop slam match. Ah...memories. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WrestlingDeacon 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2004 Ah, the KINGDOME. Nice to see my legacy lives on, even if it's just an extension of King's legacy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Suicide King Report post Posted June 20, 2004 Hey, I appreciate it if no one else does. I still say that was one of the funniest promos I have ever read, Frosty. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ace309 0 Report post Posted June 20, 2004 Ahhh, the Kingdome. Cut to a montage of shots. King driving a bulldozer pushing a large mound of dirt. King expertly nailing 2x4’s in place to form a frame. King installing seats with the help of a power screwdriver. King waxing the hardwood arena floor. King smartly calling the local electric company to check on the existence of any underground power lines before doing any deep digging. King turns to the camera with his ear still to the receiver and shoots a thumbs up. He smiles and a white sparkle ‘pings’ off of his blindingly brilliant teeth. Cut to Louie the Lightening Bug shaking his head in proud confidence. An itty-bitty tear trickles down his cheek. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Aecas Report post Posted June 20, 2004 I loved that promo, can we dig it back up? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Beingz0wningj00 Report post Posted June 20, 2004 Pffft... The real King would just pay someone to do all that labor for him. As for Zed... thanks for the heads up... but I just liked calling Thoth a cuntworm... heck I'll call him the penis cake king next time he books me to... cause that's just the way I treat Thoth! And yes Thoth... you are the WORST booker we've had*remembers TNT* THE SECOND WORST booker we've had. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
King Cucaracha 0 Report post Posted June 23, 2004 Yay me. See ya'll in 10 hours. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
