SNL Review

[bob_barron 0]

SNL Review- Catherine Zeta Jones/Franz Ferdinand

 

Sports Report-

 

Leafs- Their 4 game winning streak was bound to end sometime, and the Flyers always beat us, so I can’t say I was surprised. While they’ve surprised people and Lindros has been good, they need to work at protecting leads. IT’S THE NEW NHL!~

 

Canucks- The Canucks have been fabulous this year, I really have no complaints. Tonight’s game gave me a mini-heart attack but they toughed it out. The Big 3 have delivered, and Cloots isn’t so bad.

 

Saints- Yea, I’m starting to give up on the season. They got screwed over against the Falcons and Deuce is gone. If they move to San Antonio or Los Angeles I’ll just support the new team that comes to New Orleans.

 

Mailbag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!-

 

Chad Ruffner writes-

 

I thought Raw this past Monday Night was a largely entertaining program, probably one of their better efforts of The Year aside from "Homecoming". The Show flowed well and was never boring throughout, with The Highlight for me being The Steve Austin/Stephanie McMahon/Coachman segment. Say what you will about Austin, but he can still work a crowd and tonight was no exception. There may not have been a lot of actual matches Monday, but I didn't really mind as several story-lines/programs were advanced for "Taboo Tuesday".(Which may still tank like last year's did, but at least they are trying.) I didn't like how they are talking about giving J.R. his job back so soon after he was "fired", however. I just think that It devalues the believability of the situation, especially considering that J.R. has been "fired" 37 times In the last 3 years. Oh well. Wouldn't be a Raw without at least one bitch from me. What Did You Think? Chad

 

I missed the first little bit of RAW and was only half paying attention, b/c I saw Shopgirl. The main event was horrible but Flair’s promo was really good. Coach imitating JR was funny, but got old fast.

 

Wanna be in the mailbag???? Email me at [email protected]

 

And now the review….

 

Cold Opening

Cast- Darrell Hammond, Will Forte, Fred Armisen, Finesse Mitchell, Rachel Dratch, Kenan Thompson, Jason Sudeikis,

Thoughts- Once again, I’m glad that Forte gets a chance to try his hand at W. Darrell as Brit Hume was pretty random, and I don’t think many people knew who he was. This was funny, especially Sudeikis’ botched teleprompter reading and them switching out Finesse for Kenan. Nothing too hilarious, and I have to dispute their claim My Name Is Earl is not a hit, because it is. It is disheartening that people don’t watch The Office though. This was pretty funny, not much too complain about. ***1/4

 

Monologue

Cast- Catherine Zeta-Jones

Thoughts- Chicago was on NBC tonight (Good filler during the Leafs-Flyers game since Air Force One wasn’t making any sense) so having already seen Catherine Zeta-Jones dance around, this didn’t really do it for me. In fact, this reminded me of the horrible Kate Winslet monologue from last year. The host singing is rarely funny. *

 

BUTT Cancer

Cast- Amy Poehler, Jason Sudeikis

Thoughts- Call me a sucker for low-brow humour but I laughed at this much more then I should have. Cancer of the BUTT is just a funny thing to say. Plus, the words pooper and fudge always make me laugh. So kudos to SNL for that. ***

 

Newsnight with Aaron Brown

Cast- Zeta-Jones, Hammond

Thoughts- They really should just give Darrell’s Aaron Brown its own skit like in the Ray Romano episode, instead of it saddling it with a lame bit like that. Zeta-Jones had nothing to work with here and it showed. I love Darrell’s impression of Brown and he had some good lines, but not even he could save the pretty lame premise. It sounded like Zeta-Jones was supposed to be playing Christine Amapour so why not just call her that? **1/4

 

Dance Party

Cast- Zeta-Jones, Seth Meyers, Thompson, Armisen, Horatio Sanz, Forte, Mitchell, Bill Hader, Andy Samberg

Thoughts- As I said earlier, I watched Chicago in between the hockey game, so I didn’t need to hear the music for Roxie be looped over and over, after I had already heard it and become sick of it then. I really don’t know what the hell this was supposed to be, because it certainly wasn’t funny. I mean, Zeta-Jones already did her theatre stuff in the monologue, I think once is more then enough. Given that Seth is the writing supervisor, I thought this skit needed lots of supervision, since it had no point and thus sucked pretty badly. Samberg saying jazz was the only time I laughed. ½*

 

Franz Ferdinand “Do You Want To”

Thoughts- I like Franz Ferdinand, and I always dig the whole British rocker getup and this was no exception. The song isn’t groundbreaking anything, but it’s a fun 3 minute song to listen to and the guitar hooks are quite good. I would’ve liked to see them when I saw U2 but instead we got Keane. Boo. But yay for Franz Ferdinand. ***1/4

 

Weekend Update

Cast- Tina Fey, Poehler, Armisen, Sudeikis

Thoughts- Woo, Tina’s back. I always thought the one silver lining to Jeff knocking her up was we wouldn’t have to see her on WU anymore. I was wrong. Jeff can’t even do this right! I thought Tina was better then Horatio, but the Fey-Poehler duo is still really bad. Amy is just never going to be good at doing this, and Tina still laughs like an idiot when Amy tells a bad joke or mugs for the camera. But I guess it’s a slight improvement or something. Fred as the blind comic had its moments, but Fred as the deaf comic is funnier. Sudeikis was hilarious as the high school coach. His comments about punting had me laughing my ass off, and it was an excellent commentary. Punting is for quitters. Tina and Amy had a few funny jokes but this made me really want to flip over and see the Canucks v. Avs finish. **

 

Italian Hotel

Cast- Zeta-Jones, Poehler, Thompson, Armisen, Sanz, Sudeikis, Hader

Thoughts- Bill Hader was really funny here and I loved the jokes about Rodney King and Kenan and Jason being gay lovers. Horatio was not needed here and the fighting between Zeta-Jones and Hader got old pretty fast, but Hader’s pop culture references were very funny and Fred was his usual good odd self. Didn’t care for the ending, but this had enough good moments to make it watchable. **3/4

 

Access Hollywood

Cast- Zeta-Jones, Meyers, Poehler, Sanz, Thomspon, Sudeikis

Thoughts- Zeta-Jones trying to do an impression of a teenage singer was funny but not for the good reasons that make me like skits. Seth’s Billy Bush impression was okay but the rest of this skit was just the same tired stuff they seem to do every other episode. Amy’s Sharon Stone impression is neither funny nor relevant. I mean, who gives a crap about Sharon Stone? Not even Kenan in drag could save this. ½*

 

The Hot French Teacher

Cast- Zeta-Jones, Poehler, Dratch, Mitchell, Thompson, Meyers, Sanz, Samberg

Thoughts- Wow, the requisite Catherine Zeta-Jones is hot skit, and I actually found it to be really funny. Making Zeta-Jones a French teacher made the skit that much more awesomer, since you just hate anyone who immediately comes in and starts talking French. Finesse as the fire marshall was funny and I thought Seth was hilarious, even though I took Latin for three years and I don’t remember hearing the word Boo-Yah. I really liked Horatio ogling the teacher only to have Rachel be his wife, was a good payoff. Maybe I was happy the Canucks beat the Avs, but this skit just made me laugh. ***1/2

 

Franz Ferdinand “Take Me Out”

Thoughts- Wow, Franz didn’t play another song from the new album. Interesting. I really got into Take Me Out (playing Madden will do that to you) and I thought this was a great performance. Next week is Sheryl Crow, who will probably not suck, but won’t be as good as Franz was. Very good stuff here, hooray for Brits who can play the guitar. ***3/4

 

Wedding

Cast- Zeta-Jones, Forte, Fey, Sanz, Poehler, Armisen, Mitchell, Sudeikis

Thoughts- Don’t know why Tina was in this skit, since this seemed kind of like a Forte skit. I know the humour was a bit low-brow, but I thought Forte was great as always and Zeta-Jones held her own. There were some really funny lines here and I liked the kiss->spank at the end. I always seem to like the Forte skit at the end of the show. ***

 

Morgan Stanley Dean Witter

Cast- Forte, Poehler, Armisen, Bill Hader

Thoughts- These ads creep the heck out of me. Forte was hilarious here and I loved him just going off on Amy. I also laughed when Bill Hader called him a dick. Welcome to the show Bill. Word of advice: If you want to make me laugh really hard, say cock. It’s funnier. Anyway, thought the ending was a bit flat, but Forte was awesome. ***1/2

 

Schoenwald Studios

Cast- Zeta-Jones, Meyers, Poehler, Dratch, Hammond

Thoughts- Yep, it’s official. Schowenwald Studios is a dead character. It hit its peak when Snoop Dogg talked about the Muppets, but this was just really flat and painful to watch. Poor Darrell, he had to stay till the end for that? ¾*

 

Bottom Line- Avg. skit was **.33 making this a thumbs in the middle show. It got off to a really bad start but towards the end it started to make a run but just couldn’t do it. Catherine Zeta-Jones was nice to look at, but was a pretty uninspiring host. A lot of the skits just didn’t have a chance tonight, as they were burdened with really lame set-ups and premises. I have absolutely no hope for Lance Armstrong next week, so I’m crossing my fingers that he falls off his bike or gets cancer or something. Pretty flat show this week, and Tina coming back won’t make things any better. Come on Seth, do a better job supervising that writing!

 

Thumbs in the Middle

[UseTheSledgehammerUh 0]

"I have absolutely no hope for Lance Armstrong next week, so I’m crossing my fingers that he falls off his bike or gets cancer." - Bob Barron

 

 

You're a fucking asshole. A friendless, ugly, fucking asshole. And if I ever saw you in the street I'd beat the shit out of you.

 

I mean, dear Lord...a nerdly SNL reviewer is upset that perhaps the greatest athlete in sports history will be on his show?

 

NEWS FLASH, dipshit. The TERRIBLE SHOW that you are reviewing ****asked him to host it****. Why don't you rip SNL instead of wishing cancer on someone?

 

Completely unprofessional and pathetic. And that's coming from ME, who usually goes out of his way to make ridiculous comments.

[Guest Vitamin X]

Yeah that was really bad form, bob.

 

And anytime I agree with UTSU is a rare occasion, so take that into account.

[UZI Suicide 0]

"I have absolutely no hope for Lance Armstrong next week, so I’m crossing my fingers that he falls off his bike or gets cancer." - Bob Barron

 

 

You're a fucking asshole.  A friendless, ugly, fucking asshole.  And if I ever saw you in the street I'd beat the shit out of you.

 

I mean, dear Lord...a nerdly SNL reviewer is upset that perhaps the greatest athlete in sports history will be on his show?

 

NEWS FLASH, dipshit.  The TERRIBLE SHOW that you are reviewing ****asked him to host it****.  Why don't you rip SNL instead of wishing cancer on someone?

 

Completely unprofessional and pathetic.  And that's coming from ME, who usually goes out of his way to make ridiculous comments.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

I think the only word to properly describe this situation is.. owned.

[SuperJerk 0]

I think Bob's comment about Armstrong getting cancer was supposed to be a joke, since DUH, HE ALREADY HAD CANCER.

 

It'd be like me wishing Bush would choke on a pretzel, or that his daughters grow up to be drunken college sluts. Its funny because I'm wishing for something that not only already happened, but people made a GIGANTIC FUCKING DEAL ABOUT.

[CanadianChris 0]

I think Bob's comment about Armstrong getting cancer was supposed to be a joke, since DUH, HE ALREADY HAD CANCER.

 

It'd be like me wishing Bush would choke on a pretzel, or that his daughters grow up to be drunken college sluts.  Its funny because I'm wishing for something that not only already happened, but people made a GIGANTIC FUCKING DEAL ABOUT.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

No, it's really not like that at all. It was about as tasteless a comment as you could make.

[the max 0]

Yeah and making a gigantic deal about someone surviving three types of cancer and then winning the most grueling contest in sports a few more times is SO boring![/sarcasm]

[SuperJerk 0]

No, it's really not like that at all. It was about as tasteless a comment as you could make.

Oh, trust me. It could've been worse.

[Guest Joshua A. Norton]

The cancer line was an obvious jest. Take off your asshats and read it again.

[bob_barron 0]

You're a fucking asshole. A friendless, ugly, fucking asshole. And if I ever saw you in the street I'd beat the shit out of you.

 

No, I do have friends.

 

I mean, dear Lord...a nerdly SNL reviewer is upset that perhaps the greatest athlete in sports history will be on his show?

 

I'm not upset, I just don't like that another athlete is hosting, since that usually means sucky episode.

 

NEWS FLASH, dipshit. The TERRIBLE SHOW that you are reviewing ****asked him to host it****. Why don't you rip SNL instead of wishing cancer on someone?

 

NEWS FLASH, dipshit. It was a joke. You can think it was funny, but whatever.

 

I think the only word to properly describe this situation is.. owned.

 

Nah, not really. The irony of a complete moron like UTSH going off on me and acting all serious over a joke I made is pretty funny though.

 

I think Bob's comment about Armstrong getting cancer was supposed to be a joke, since DUH, HE ALREADY HAD CANCER.

 

Give that man a prize!

 

Oh, trust me. It could've been worse.

 

Give that man another prize!

[Mik 0]

I'm sorry, but Horatio as Michael McDonald made me laugh my ass off.

[SuperJerk 0]

So...what kind of prize are we talking about here?

[Aero 0]

I thought SNL was horrible last night. Surprisingly, I think the only skit I liked was the Dance Party one (but I did miss the cold opening).

[UseTheSledgehammerUh 0]

This complete moron is a technology major college student with a GPA in the high 3s...which is 3 more girls than you've ever been close too, I might add.

 

I'm just going to ignore you, pizza face.

[bob_barron 0]

Wow, I'm blown away with your accolades. Don't you have one of your smashing mixers to go to! Rolling around in jello LOL!

 

It's pretty funny seeing someone get so pissy over a simple joke.

[Dr. Zaius 0]

Wait...Franz Ferdinand was on SNL last night?

 

I'd have thought he'd stopped making public appearances after that whole assasination in Sarajevo thing.

[bob_barron 0]

I laughed.

 

Good work.

[Dr. Zaius 0]

**bows**

[Boner Kawanger 0]

Wow, Lance Armstrong is the greatest athlete in sports history? Really? I'll gladly say he's a great and inspirational man for coming back from cancer (which is a touchy suubject to joke about, Bob), but he rides a bike. In fact, he's the only bike rider any of you could probably name. How this qualifies him as the greatest athlete ever is beyond me. His SNL will probably suck given that you could have a funny actor on and it would suck.

 

Just to make sure no one attacks me (heavens to Betsy!), Lance Armstrong may very well be the most inspirational athlete ever, but the greatest is really, really, really pushing it.

[bob_barron 0]

Could YOU ride a bike?

 

Oh wait....you can? Nevermind.

 

I wonder how much uproar I would cause if Helen Keller or Christopher Reeves ever hosted.

[Angel_Grace_Blue 0]

I thought Andy was in the Morgan Stanely commercial. Andy needs to be used more.

 

Also, I really hope that Keifer Sutherland hosts in the near future so he and Samberg can be 'reunited'.

[UseTheSledgehammerUh 0]

If Jordan and Armstrong played HORSE 1000 times, Armstrong would win one of them, for sure.

 

If Jordan and Armstrong cycled 50 miles for 1000 times, Armstrong would win every one.

 

A Team of Lance Armstrongs would surely win at least one game out of 1000 against a Team of Babe Ruths, because baseball players have off days.

 

A Team of Lance Armstrongs would win a 50-mile cycle race every time against a team of Barry Bonds clones, or A-Rods.

_______

 

My point: Cycling for such long durations requires better physical shape, more athleticism, and better preparation than any other sport in the world.

[bob_barron 0]

For someone so outraged by my joke, UTSU sure seems to keep checking out this thread

[NYU 0]

A Team of Lance Armstrongs would surely win at least one game out of 1000 against a Team of Babe Ruths, because baseball players have off days.

 

What the hell are you trying to prove with this sentence?

[bob_barron 0]

Newsflash:

 

Baseball is not an individual sport.

[Robert 0]

Well, they may be better conditioned but who says that the can pitch, catch, or bat? Or, if threw shoot the ball and make a rebound. Just because there well conditioned doesn't mean they could beat Michael Jordan's or Babe Ruth's.

[smh810 0]

You're a fucking asshole. A friendless, ugly, fucking asshole. And if I ever saw you in the street I'd beat the shit out of you.

 

I mean, dear Lord...a nerdly SNL reviewer is upset that perhaps the greatest athlete in sports history will be on his show?

 

NEWS FLASH, dipshit. The TERRIBLE SHOW that you are reviewing ****asked him to host it****. Why don't you rip SNL instead of wishing cancer on someone?

 

Completely unprofessional and pathetic. And that's coming from ME, who usually goes out of his way to make ridiculous comments.

 

Dude, first off you HAVE to know that Barron is one of the first guys on this board to make tasteless jokes like that. Secondly, for someone who has a reputation for saying outreagous things you got your panties in a wad over something really lame. Its such a ridiculously obvious joke so please get over yourself.

[Slayer 0]

If Jordan and Armstrong played HORSE 1000 times, Armstrong would win one of them, for sure.

 

If Jordan and Armstrong cycled 50 miles for 1000 times, Armstrong would win every one.

 

A Team of Lance Armstrongs would surely win at least one game out of 1000 against a Team of Babe Ruths, because baseball players have off days.

 

A Team of Lance Armstrongs would win a 50-mile cycle race every time against a team of Barry Bonds clones, or A-Rods.

This is simultaneously one of the best and worst posts I've ever seen

[UseTheSledgehammerUh 0]

Haha, yeah I was pretty drunk when posting it. It reminded me of when a bunch of buddies and I were watching Villanova get screwed in the year's past NCAA tourney against UNC. We argued how many of us it would take to defeat 2 UNC players.

 

Barron's still a tool who makes fun of cancer victims, though. But he's a walking parody of himself and his own TSM celebrity is one that is mocked and seen as the "stereotype" of every online poster - a nerdy weirdo. He's that little kid in school that you see get picked on, but still tries to make nice with you, and you subtlely allow him to hang around, and make posts about shows like SNL that haven't been funny since the mid-90s...but deep down you know he's everything about every internet stereotype that is ridiculed. So if there's one picture of one poster on a message board you inhabit you don't want seen by your normal friends, it's his.

 

And with that, I bid him good riddance. I've already totally thrown him though the mud and proved I can own him in every sense of living.

 

And since he's allowed to wish cancer on Lance Armstrong. IF Armstrong were to get cancer again, then I hope Bob Barron gets cancer. Cancer of the testicles. So that he may go to a doctor, and perhaps, if the timing is right, may finally feel the touch of a woman.

[bob_barron 0]

Haha, yeah I was pretty drunk when posting it. It reminded me of when a bunch of buddies and I were watching Villanova get screwed in the year's past NCAA tourney against UNC. We argued how many of us it would take to defeat 2 UNC players.

 

Oh, how I just envy your life.

 

Barron's still a tool who makes fun of cancer victims, though. But he's a walking parody of himself and his own TSM celebrity is one that is mocked and seen as the "stereotype" of every online poster - a nerdy weirdo. He's that little kid in school that you see get picked on, but still tries to make nice with you, and you subtlely allow him to hang around, and make posts about shows like SNL that haven't been funny since the mid-90s...but deep down you know he's everything about every internet stereotype that is ridiculed. So if there's one picture of one poster on a message board you inhabit you don't want seen by your normal friends, it's his.

 

You're the tool who completely overreacts to a simple joke I made about next week's host. I post this review at other places, and you know how many people have gotten outraged over it? 0, because they're smart enough to realise it was a simple joke.

 

And I wish I could look a great as you do decked out in your Eagles gear. Don't you have some post ripping apart the Phillies to write?

 

I didn't even know I have a TSM celebrity. I think it's funny that you seem to have such utter contempt for me, yet you clicked on my review and have done it before. I must be doing something right.

 

And with that, I bid him good riddance. I've already totally thrown him though the mud and proved I can own him in every sense of living.

 

I think you've said that earlier in the thread, yet came back to make a nonsensical post about Lance Armstrong playing baseball.

 

All you've really proven is that your a little bitch who can't comprehend when someone is joking.

 

And since he's allowed to wish cancer on Lance Armstrong. IF Armstrong were to get cancer again, then I hope Bob Barron gets cancer. Cancer of the testicles. So that he may go to a doctor, and perhaps, if the timing is right, may finally feel the touch of a woman.

 

I'd laugh at the irony of me getting testicular cancer. I just think it's really sad that you can't seem to get that what I said about Lance Armstrong was a joke.