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See No Evil

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Well, on another note, they just showed "Abominable" on Sci-Fi (it's not really a sci fi pictures original though, as it had a small theatrical release last month) and it was suprisingly a hell of a lot of fun. It's on again at 1:00 AM, and I recomend it. Plus, it's got some cool death scenes (including one nearing the end that I marked out for. You'll know it when you see it), and some genre vets (Lance Hendrikson, Jeffrey Combs,Dee Wallace Stone,), so again, it gets my recomendation.

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So anyone know how Vince is going to get back at the critics for panning the movie on Raw?

 

I mean, he'd just look dumb bashing the Da Vinci Code, since the critics ripped that one apart too.

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I watched this... I will now forever be haunted by the image of Kane beating the meat.

 

It wasn't that bad, and had a few promising things about it, but a bunch of shit will overshadow that.

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Guest J0bber
I watched this... I will now forever be haunted by the image of Kane beating the meat.

 

It wasn't that bad, and had a few promising things about it, but a bunch of shit will overshadow that.

 

Does it actually show Kane's schlong? I hope not...

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See No Evil, which wasn't screened for critics before opening day in keeping with the pervasive trend of 2006, is uncomfortably misogynistic even by horror-movie standards. Women invariably are referred to as sluts - and worse - and are tied up and tortured, gagged and kept in cages. They are dragged by their hair across the floor and tossed over the shoulder like rag dolls.

 

Yeah, and so are the men. Fucking idiot.

 

I saw the movie last night in a relatively packed theater. I had a fun time, although the moments between Kane's opening scene and Kane's reintroduction are difficult to sit through at times.

 

Gregory Dark is certainly a music video director. There is one ridiculously ill-conceived shot of one of the male cast members running down a hallway with the steadycam tilted upwards towards his face, all while eighteen different cuts play out on the screen. My friend asked me why they were doing that, and all I could reply with was, "Well, that's we in the biz call bad directing and editing."

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Gregory Dark is certainly a music video director. There is one ridiculously ill-conceived shot of one of the male cast members running down a hallway with the steadycam tilted upwards towards his face, all while eighteen different cuts play out on the screen. My friend asked me why they were doing that, and all I could reply with was, "Well, that's we in the biz call bad directing and editing."

 

That is one of my least favorite shots ever, all time, in the history of film.

 

I give the film a solid F or D-, and that would be about it. It's a horrible story, horribly acted (Kane only has one line, and saying that what he has is even a line is stretching it), with horrible editing, very bad direction, and is in every way that a film can be a paint-by-numbers "horror" flick.

 

I wouldn't recommend it to anyone at all for the most part. Maybe if you are in a goofy mood and just want to go check it out to laugh at and mock it, while seeing a few decent kills (being done by f'n Kane).

 

The most original part of the entire flick is after the movie is actually over:

 

After the film is over, and Kane is on the ground dead and out of it, with a huge hole where one of his eyes used to be (a character pushed a pole through it), a dog walks up next to him and pisses right in the hole.

 

I laughed at that - maybe just because it was a fitting ending to the horrible movie, or maybe because it was Kane, but I couldn't help but laugh at it.

 

So yeah, if you have time to kill and are in the mood for a bad horror movie, we've all been in that mood at one time or another, then check it out. Otherwise, stay far, far away.

 

And yeah, you do see Kane Masturbate, a few times actually. While you don't really see anything

well, I think there was a QUICK shot of Kane doing it when much younger, and it's not even Kane at that time, where you see something for a second

, it's still disturbing beyond words. I couldn't help but think that this was Vince taking the Katie Vick storyline to the next step. Ugh.

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After reading Downhomes review, I think I'll skip it when it comes to DVD. I don't care if you don't see anything: the world should not have to see Kane bleed his weed. I know Vince thinks we do, but we don't.

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To make matters worse, it wasn't even vital to the story in any way (then again, when would that EVER be vital to a story?).

 

One minute you think he's just a psycho, then all of a sudden he starts wanking it. The entire theater erupted in laughter when it happened - I was mainly in shock. I almost thought I was watching a recent RAW or SD.

:lol:

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Guest hasbeen

1.6 million estimated in the first day, on a 8 million production budget (not counting advertising, I suppose), they should be happy. I clicked similar films when looking at Boxofficemojo and if it tops 15 million it would be ahead of a few horror movies I've heard of, some I havent. It got a C+ on that site, 26 gave it an A, 14 an F, 53 voters so far, but like somebody said those going high might be plants. I'd say that happens a lot on those type boards though.

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It's probably a good idea for Vince and the WWE creative team to get their stupid ideas made into movies so they can get them out of their systems. Then they can focus on making Raw and Smackdown better. I mean, they just had Kane spanking the monkey in a movie. That has to be worth at least a really good episode of Smackdown.

 

Either way it sounds like it was damn funny, watching Kane violently kill someone before going into his little room to squeeze one out. Because everyone knows the first thing murderers do after killing someone is going home to beat their meat.

 

Now I have to wonder what Steve Austin's and John Cena's movies are gonna be like.

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Either way it sounds like it was damn funny, watching Kane violently kill someone before going into his little room to squeeze one out. Because everyone knows the first thing murderers do after killing someone is going home to beat their meat.

 

 

To be fair, some serial killers were known to do that. Causing pain and death sexually excited them to the point they needed to satisfy the urge. If Vince or someone had been beyond it, he would have had sex with a headless corpse.

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What is this movie even about? Can someone give me a full spoiler detail of the movie?

 

Jacob's mother was an evil religious nut who kept him locked up in a cage as a child, threatened him for masturbating, and even tied up a girl and gouged her eys out in front of Kane. Cut to, let's say, 2002, as two cops try to take down Jacob Goodnight (Kane) after a murdering spree. One cop dies, the other, who shoots Kane in the head, gets his hand lower arm chopped off. Four years later, twentysomething male and female prisoners, along with the cop with an artificial hand, who all look and dress like models, head to a dilapidated hotel to help turn it into a homeless shelter. Lo and behold, the kind old lady who is there to supervise the thing is actually Jacob's mother, which explains why Jacob has been able to booby trap the hotel.

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Now I have to wonder what Steve Austin's and John Cena's movies are gonna be like.

 

I just wonder how Cena's character is going to change for the Marine. Are they going to bring Booker T to RAW as GI Bro or have Cena come from under the ring and shoot a bunch of jobber with a machine gun? I'm scared....VERY scared.

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Now I have to wonder what Steve Austin's and John Cena's movies are gonna be like.

 

I just wonder how Cena's character is going to change for the Marine. Are they going to bring Booker T to RAW as GI Bro or have Cena come from under the ring and shoot a bunch of jobber with a machine gun? I'm scared....VERY scared.

Sgt. Slaughter will become a tag team with Cena.

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Guest Arnold_OldSchool

The Scary thing is that the WWE Corporate Honchos saw this as a better movie than Cena's The Marine.

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Wanna take bets on what the IMDB rating will be when it finally updates? I'm gonna go for an optimistic 5.5

 

 

Finally come in - User Rating: 5.2/10 (234 votes) Not a bad guess.

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I checked it out over the weekend, of course had to get massively baked for this one, and taking into account this wasnt going to be a well thought out production, I went into it looking for some fun gore/kills and campiness and I pretty much got it. Otherwise there is no way you can even come close to liking this one, has to be taken with a similar mindset that one would have while watching a Troma movie or something. So bad and campy that its borderline entertaining at times. Also, another positive was that the special effects werent too bad overall and they did seem to spend a good amount on them.

 

I still wouldnt bother going to see this in the theater though - easy DVD pickup though for campy horror fans if you ask me.

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Now I have to wonder what Steve Austin's and John Cena's movies are gonna be like.

 

I just wonder how Cena's character is going to change for the Marine. Are they going to bring Booker T to RAW as GI Bro or have Cena come from under the ring and shoot a bunch of jobber with a machine gun? I'm scared....VERY scared.

 

DOWNSOUTHSOLDIERS2copy.jpg

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Guest adamsummers

i read on WWE.com the other day these reviews cena & HBK did of this movie, they both said the kill that delt with "a cell phone" was one of the most creative kills in any horror film they've ever seen. for anyone who saw it, is that true? what was the kill dealing with this cell phone?

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i read on WWE.com the other day these reviews cena & HBK did of this movie, they both said the kill that delt with "a cell phone" was one of the most creative kills in any horror film they've ever seen. for anyone who saw it, is that true? what was the kill dealing with this cell phone?

 

This one girl was hiding from Kane, until her cell phone goes and Kane finds her takes her cellphone and shoves it down their throat, it was awesome

 

Seriously this movie was actually good horror movie.

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Guest adamsummers

i read on WWE.com the other day these reviews cena & HBK did of this movie, they both said the kill that delt with "a cell phone" was one of the most creative kills in any horror film they've ever seen. for anyone who saw it, is that true? what was the kill dealing with this cell phone?

 

This one girl was hiding from Kane, until her cell phone goes and Kane finds her takes her cellphone and shoves it down their throat, it was awesome

 

Seriously this movie was actually good horror movie.

 

cool... i guess

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i read on WWE.com the other day these reviews cena & HBK did of this movie, they both said the kill that delt with "a cell phone" was one of the most creative kills in any horror film they've ever seen. for anyone who saw it, is that true? what was the kill dealing with this cell phone?

 

This one girl was hiding from Kane, until her cell phone goes and Kane finds her takes her cellphone and shoves it down their throat, it was awesome

 

Seriously this movie was actually good horror movie.

 

People should use that clip to remind people to shut their phones off or put it on vibe.

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Either way it sounds like it was damn funny, watching Kane violently kill someone before going into his little room to squeeze one out. Because everyone knows the first thing murderers do after killing someone is going home to beat their meat.

 

You don't watch A&E much, do you? :P

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