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TSB Sim Season: Week 16

We're down to the wire and a lot of movement still going on. Big story this week was the Browns scoring 24 points in the 4th quarter to come from behind to beat the Oilers 30-21. The Steelers won their game to once again move into a tie for 1st. I was slightly less lazy this time around, figuring out some of the easier tiebreaks, and the Steelers control their own destiny for the division as if they beat the Browns in Week 17 they'll end up with a better division record than the Oilers. In the AFC West, both Chargers and Raiders won to remain dead locked on top the division but the Chargers control their own destiny by virtue of having a better conference record than the Raiders. In the NFC, the Giants lost to the Redskins and the Eagles won so after looking at the tiebreaks as it turns out the Giants really haven't won the division yet. If the Eagles win next week and the Giants lose, the Eagles win the divsion by having a better divisional record. In the race for the last wild card spot in the conference, the Bears control their own destiny as they would end up with a better conference record than the Rams if they win next week although they will have to beat the 49ers to do so. As for a potential three-way ties in both conference for the final wild card spots, you can forget me trying to figure them out. AFC 1. Bills 12-3 2. Chargers 10-5 3. Steelers 9-6 4t. Dolphins 10-5 4t. Raiders 10-5 6. Oilers 9-6 Still Alive: Browns 8-7, Chiefs 8-7 NFC 1. Vikings 12-3 2. 49ers 12-3 3. Giants 11-4 4. Eagles 10-5 5. Redskins 9-6 6. Bears 8-7 Still Alive: Rams 8-7, Saints 7-8 Week 16 Scores Phoenix 28, Denver 20 PHX: 4-11, DEN: 7-8 -Timm Rosenbach: 312 yards passing L.A. Raiders 24, New Orleans 21 RAI: 10-5, NO: 7-8 -Bo Jackson: 111 yards rushing New England 28, N.Y. Jets 24 NE: 4-11, NYJ: 3-12 -Steve Grogan: 243 yards passing Indianapolis 21, Buffalo 17 IND: 6-9, BUF: 12-3 -Jessie Hester: 4 rec, 153 yards Cleveland 30, Houston 21 CLE: 8-7, HOU: 9-6 -Eric Metcalf: 96 yards receiving Browns 24 point 4th quarter Washington 24, N.Y. Giants 23 WAS: 9-6, NYG: 11-4 -Art Monk: 5 rec, 94 yards San Francisco 28, Kansas City 17 SF: 12-3, KC: 8-7 -Jerry Rice: 7 rec, 162 yards Philadelphia 34, Dallas 7 PHI: 10-5, DAL: 5-10 -Randall Cunnigham: 238 yards passing Seattle 16, Atlanta 14 SEA: 6-9, ATL: 2-13 -Dave Krieg: 165 yards passing Chicago 27, Tampa Bay 17 CHI: 8-7, TB: 6-9 -Neal Anderson: 98 yards rushing Detroit 42, Green Bay 14 DET: 4-11, GB: 5-10 -Richard Johnson: 5 rec, 126 yards Pittsburgh 24, Cincinnati 13 PIT: 9-6, CIN: 5-10 -Warren Williams: 85 yards rushing San Diego 31, Miami 21 SD: 10-5, MIA: 10-5 Minnesota 34, L.A. Rams 14 MIN: 12-3, RAM: 8-7 -Hassan Jones: 8 rec, 232 yards Leaders thru Week 16 PASSING LEADERS Rating 1. Phil Simms, 191.1 2. Randall Cunningham, 178.5 3. Dan Marino, 177.2 Yards 1. Warren Moon, 3729 2. Joe Montana, 3633 3. Jim Everett, 3405 Touchdowns 1. Montana, 40 2. Marino, 38 3. Everett, 35 RECEIVING LEADERS Receptions 1. Jerry Rice, 73 2. Andre Rison, 51 3. Anthony Miller, 50 Yards 1. Rice, 1891 2. Rison, 1343 3. Henry Ellard, 1308 Touchdowns 1. Rice, 20 2. Miller, 14 3t. Many tied with 13 RUSHING LEADERS Yards 1. Thurman Thomas, 1539 2. Neal Anderson, 1434 3. Bo Jackson, 1348 Touchdowns 1. Tom Rathman, 15 2t. Anderson, 14 2t. Johnny Johnson, 14 DEFENSIVE LEADERS Interceptions 1. Kevin Ross, 10 2t. Mark Carrier, 9 2t. Erik McMillan, 9 Sacks 1. Lawrence Taylor, 21 2. Reggie White, 20 3t. Many tied with 18 SPECIAL TEAMS LEADERS Field Goals: Jeff Jaeger, 17 Punting Avg: Rohn Stark, 51.0 Punt Return Avg: Ellard, 12.8 Kick Return Avg: Tim Brown, 21.8

August 22, 2007

8/21: Raining On My Shopping Experience

8 p.m. • You know what else is pissing me off? With all this rain my area has been getting, the lawn has grown by leaps and bounds. Mother fucker, and I just mowed the lawn not too long ago. Well, it could be worse. I heard on the radio today that some place in Shittsburgh just had the roads paved but no drains installed. This means the plethora of H2O Mother Nature has been giving us has been making its way into some houses. One yins-er said he can’t live in this neighborhood due to all the flooding that’s taken place over the past few months. That’s gotta suck, although I can think of a few other reasons to get the hell out of the city. 7:45 p.m. • Ugh. So today the personal shopping scanner thingys were down at the grocery store. What does this mean? I had to have a cashier ring up the groceries. Fuck. Not only were the check-out lines hella long, but I was in front of some fat bitch who squirted out a kid and was paying for her groceries via WIC. What does the rapper Willie D have to say about this sort of thing? Damn straight, dawg. Here I am going through my coupons trying to make every cent count and this person in front of me spread her legs a year ago and now I have to pay for her groceries, too. “But it’s for her baby, kkk.” N*gga, I’m a Republican. Make the kid get a job. Anyway, when it was my turn, I got a fucking attitude because the cashier had to do something funky with my advantage card. I was told by the personal scanner chick that the cashier had to override my shopper card thing, and when I told the casher this, you would have thought I had asked her to take my groceries out to the car, go to my house and cook the food for me. Then there was the 90-year-old bagger with the hump who put my four bags of instant mashed potatoes in THREE DIFFERENT BAGS. Fuck, I wish I could have bagged my groceries as I went, which is what you do with the personal shopper scanning thingy. Then the cashier accuses me of not buying two Butterball turkey bacon packages, thus making my $1 off coupon invalid. Bitch, don’t even think you’re going to Jew me out of my dollar off – after all, I just spent $50+ dollars on the customer before me for Similac and other shit. Because I was also bagging my groceries and was sorting the products by bag, I knew that the turkey bacon was with the buy-one-get-one-free chicken breasts (the turkey bacon was also on sale, for those keeping score at home). I whipped out my Butterballs and shoved them in her face. Well, not really, but you get the point. I’m a coupon-clipping pro, ho. Don’t pick this battle because you’re going to lose. Anyway, after all that shit it was time to go home. God I miss you personal shopper scanning thing. Please be all better when I come back next Tuesday, same bat time, same bat channel. 7 a.m. • So whenever the better half and I go to sleep, the cats have been joining us on the bed as of late. Normally it was just Dessa who slept with us, but during the past few weeks our two males have also joined us, much to their sister's chagrin. Anyway, last night at around 1 a.m. I rolled over on Max's tail. He let out a yelp, which caused JJ to pounce on him -- right on top of me. After a few seconds of wrestling and screaming (all on top of my chest) they took off down the hall. This in turn caused Dessa to chase after them, and after about 20 more seconds of screaming and hissing, it all went silent. At one o'clock in the fucking morning. Oh this is going to be such a long-ass day.

August 21, 2007

TSB Sim Season: Week 15

It seemed liked a forgone conclusion the Raiders would take the AFC West but not anymore. They lost to the Chargers this week for their third straight loss and the Bolts have now moved into a tie for 1st at 9-5. Oilers beat Steelers 21-9 in order to reclaim sole posession of 1st place in the AFC Central. The Bills have clinched the AFC East but again the game won't recognize it yet since the Dolphins can tie for 1st still but the Bills swept the season series. The Giants lost to the Eagles but the Redskins suffered a shocking defeat to the craptastic Cardinals, so the Giants may or may not have clinched the division but I'm too lazy to go through tiebreak scenerios beyond head-to-head which the Giants/Eagles split. The game did officialy recognize the 49ers division title win after their ninth straight victory this week. The Vikings were stunned by the Bucs, who still have a very slim chance at the playoffs, which now gives us a three-way tie atop the NFC. The 49ers would be the odd team out in a three-way tie as they lost to both the Giants and Vikings. AFC 1. Bills 12-2 2t. Raiders/Chargers 9-5 2t. Oilers 9-5 4. Dolphins 10-4 5. Raiders/Chargers 9-5 6t. Chiefs/Steelers 8-6 Still Alive: Browns 7-7, Broncos 7-7 NFC 1t. Giants 11-3 1t. Vikings 11-3 1t. 49ers 11-3 4. Eagles 9-5 5t. Redskins 8-6 5t. Rams 8-6 Still Alive: Bears 7-7, Saints 7-7, Buccaneers 6-8 Week 15 Scores Detroit 24, N.Y. Jets 17 DET: 3-11, NYJ: 3-11 -Robert Clark: 4 rec, 113 yards Philadelphia 28, N.Y. Giants 24 PHI: 9-5, NYG: 11-3 -Keith Byars: 7 rec, 132 yards Indianapolis 21, New England 14 IND: 5-9, NE: 3-11 -Albert Bentley: 92 yards rushing San Francisco 31, Seattle 21 SF: 11-3, SEA: 5-9 -Joe Montana: 240 yards passing Denver 21, Cleveland 17 DEN: 7-7, CLE: 7-7 -Mark Jackson: 57 yards receiving New Orleans 20, Dallas 17 OT NO: 7-7, DAL: 5-9 -Craig Heyward: 82 yards receiving San Diego 20, Kansas City 14 SD: 9-5, KC: 8-6 -Bill Joe Tolliver: 154 yards passing Buffalo 24, L.A. Raiders 21 BUF: 12-2, RAI: 9-5 -Thurman Thomas: 154 yards rushing Phoenix 27, Washington 24 PHX: 3-11, WAS: 8-6 -Johnny Johnson: 110 yards rushing Chicago 33, Green Bay 24 CHI: 7-7, GB: 5-9 -Ron Morris: 4 rec, 118 yards Houston 21, Pittsburgh 9 HOU: 9-5, PIT: 8-6 -Ernest Givens: 4 rec, 108 yards Miami 38, Cincinnati 14 MIA: 10-4, CIN: 5-9 -Mark Clayton: 6 rec, 158 yards Tampa Bay 28, Minnesota 27 TB: 6-8, MIN: 11-3 -Vinny Testaverde: 266 yards passing L.A. Rams 17, Atlanta 14 RAM: 8-6, ATL: 2-12 -Cleveland Gary: 82 yards rushing, leaves injured Leaders thru Week 15 PASSING LEADERS Rating 1. Phil Simms, 197.1 2. Dan Marino, 182.5 3. Randall Cunningham, 177.2 Yards 1. Warren Moon, 3593 2. Joe Montana, 3389 3. Jim Everett, 3228 Touchdowns 1t. Montana, 36 1t. Marino, 36 3. Moon, 34 RECEIVING LEADERS Receptions 1. Jerry Rice, 66 2. Andre Rison, 49 3. Anthony Miller, 47 Yards 1. Rice, 1729 2. Rison, 1258 3. Henry Ellard, 1254 Touchdowns 1. Rice, 19 2t. Miller, 13 2t. James Lofton, 13 RUSHING LEADERS Yards 1. Thurman Thomas, 1430 2. Neal Anderson, 1336 3. Bo Jackson, 1237 Touchdowns 1. Tom Rathman, 15 2t. Many tied with 13 DEFENSIVE LEADERS Interceptions 1. Kevin Ross, 10 2t. Many tied with 8 Sacks 1. Lawrence Taylor, 20 2t. Derrick Thomas, 18 2t. Reggie White, 18 SPECIAL TEAMS LEADERS Field Goals: Jeff Jaeger; Morten Andersen, 16 Punting Avg: Mike Horan, 50.9 Punt Return Avg: Ellard, 12.8 Kick Return Avg: Tim Brown, 21.2

August 21, 2007

How To Vibrate

So much for small things...

-After watching Saturday Night's Main Event, I no longer care too much about Vince has a kid anymore. Yep, what was once corny but enoyable has now grown old fast. So much for small things... -SuperBad is fucking awesome. Really, I haven't laughed that hard in ages. The funniest movie of the year so far, beating out Knocked Up. I also saw Hot Rod on a Sunday Matinee, but wasn't too impressed. Sorry folks, it really didn't amuse me too much. If anything, it annoyed me. I skipped The Invasion, since it's gotten some pretty bad word of mouth, and didn't look all that good. -Dwarf glued penis to Hoover. I love the internet.

Gary Floyd

August 20, 2007

8/20: Being Told To Piss Off

7:30 p.m. • With my state recently getting into the slot machine business, I can't wait until this starts and the shit hits the fan, so to speak. Wha-? What are they supposed to do. Inspect every seat someone gets up from? And he still went back in to play. Fuck are these people pathetic. Man, and with Pennsylvania home to bunches and bunches of old people, there should be nothing but good times ahead. • Hey Smues, if the thought of planning a wedding is too much, try this. It will be less painful. 7:15 p.m. • Wow, so Michael Vick was fibbing when he said he had nothing to do with "Bad Newz Kennels"? I'm shocked. One thing I've wondered about during this whole ordeal. Even if he never plays football again, he was in the midst of a $100+ million contract (and I'm not even talking about endorsements). If he ends up broke due to not being able to play football, he truly is a dipshit (not like he's one already). 3 p.m. • As a follow-up to my 10:30 a.m. entry, I've been stealing Jim Rome's "ERRR" soundbite at work for a while now. Let's just say the job I took in 2004 isn't the same one as it is now. It's amazing one you agree to a wage how suddenly there were BONUS duties that weren't mentioned in the interview process. For a while I used the term "told" when describing something that wasn't in my original job description. This February, I was brought in to my head boss' office where he attempted to scold me for my over-use of the word "told" in that month's report. (I used the magic word 5 times in an 1,100-word report. Oh, and I also mentioned that the "assistant" I was to hire, who had to have a college degree, was to be paid no more than $8/hour. Funny enough, there were no takers.) Much to his surprise, I countered. Boy did I ever counter. See, when you have things like facts and the truth on your side you tend to be much more relaxed when people are attempting to besmirch you. Anyway, I was "forbidden" to use the T-word. Works for me. What do I do now? Let's see. Me talking to a sympathetic ear: "It's funny how I was tol--ERRR 'instructed' to create these TPS reports when, during my interview, I was tol-ERRR ‘it was said to me’ that this wouldn’t be my responsibility. Yeah, no more "told." That was a good idea there, chief. 10:30 a.m. • Nice. During the first segment of Boortz’s national broadcast there was a caller talking about the topic of “Would you vote for a Mormon for president.” After a long conversation of “faith,” “understanding” and all that other touchy-feely crap, the caller answered the question. “Yes … if it means keeping Hitlery out of office.” She must read "KK's Korner" because I can't imagine anyone else coming up with such a witty, original name to describe the future POTUS.

August 20, 2007

8/19: Driving With Crack Is A Bad Plan

7:15 p.m. • It was reported in a local newspaper that my out-of-control niece-in-law got in trouble with the law. She recently waived a hearing on a charge of drug possession. She got busted several months ago after being pulled over by the po-po for speeding in a residential neighborhood. When her car was being searched, the Man found a bag of crack cocaine. (Allegedly, of course). Bwahahahahahahahahahaha. To make things better, in the next article another drug possession story was reported. The suspect is a neighbor of my crack-whore sister-in-law. • Uhhh… Well, the amount of time I spend with my family does determine my happiness. Of course, the less time I spend with them the happier I am. Then again, I’m not 24 anymore. Eh, I’ve pretty much been anti-family my life so whatever. • So I saw “Flight Plan” earlier today. My God what a steaming pile of shit. SPOILERZ ahead~! Typical Hollywood garbage. OMG, the Air Marshall was the terrorist all along. I bet George W. Bush was the one who masterminded the whole thing. And I was waiting for the Muslim who was accused of being a terrorist to share a tender moment with Jodie Foster at the film’s end. Gag. At first I thought this was going to be one of those, “Her kid is dead and she’s making shit up,” but that was way too easy, and when the movie dialogue brought this up I was thinking, “Oh Christ this is actually going to be a conspiracy.” • Yeah, because tobacco isn't taxed enough already. You know, just ban the shit if you don't want people smoking.

August 19, 2007

TSB Sim Season: Week 14

49ers edged the Saints for the eighth straight win to wrap up the NFC West, although I don't think the game takes into account tiebreaks until the end of the season as it doesn't recognize it yet. Best the Rams can do is tie the 49ers for 1st but the Niners swept the season series. The Giants have almost wrapped up the NFC East as they now have a three game lead on the Redskins and Eagles but they still play the Redskins one more time and the Skins won their first meeting. In the AFC both the Raiders and Dolphins lost but both still hold the leads on the AFC West and the top wild card spot respectively. Oilers and Steelers both win this week to remain tied atop the AFC Central. Week 14 Scores Green Bay 17, Atlanta 3 GB: 5-8, ATL: 2-11 -Don Majkowski: 187 yards passing Buffalo 31, N.Y. Jets 20 BUF: 11-2, NYJ: 3-10 -Thurman Thomas: 194 total yards N.Y. Giants 24, Cincinnati 21 NYG: 11-2, CIN: 5-8 -Mark Bavaro: 5 rec, 106 yards Denver 31, New England 14 DEN: 6-7, NE: 3-10 -Bobby Humphrey: 196 yards rushing Chicago 28, Detroit 21 CHI: 6-7, DET: 2-11 -Neal Anderson: 146 yards rushing Houston 31, Philadelphia 28 OT HOU: 8-5, PHI: 8-5 -Warren Moon: 355 yards passing Pittsburgh 24, Dallas 10 PIT: 8-5, DAL: 5-8 -Bubby Brister: 222 yards passing San Diego 31, L.A. Raiders 28 OT SD: 8-5, RAI: 9-4 -Marion Butts: 125 yards rushing San Francisco 21, New Orleans 20 SF: 10-3, NO: 6-7 -Jerry Rice: 4 rec, 112 yards Cleveland 31, Indianapolis 10 CLE: 7-6, IND: 4-9 -Reggie Langhorne: 6 rec, 179 yards L.A. Rams 31, Washington 21 RAM: 7-6, WAS: 8-5 -Henry Ellard: 6 rec, 219 yards Kansas City 24, Seattle 17 KC: 8-5, SEA: 5-8 -Christian Okoye: 94 yards rushing Tampa Bay 20, Miami 17 TB: 5-8, MIA: 9-4 -Gary Anderson: 69 yards rushing Bye Weeks: Minnesota (11-2), Phoenix (2-11) Leaders thru Week 14 PASSING LEADERS Rating 1. Phil Simms, 196.2 2. Dan Marino, 177.86 3. Randall Cunningham, 174.5 Yards 1. Warren Moon, 3373 2. Joe Montana, 3149 3. Jim Everett, 3068 Touchdowns 1. Montana, 33 2t. Many tied with 31 RECEIVING LEADERS Receptions 1. Jerry Rice, 63 2t. Andre Rison, 45 2t. Anthony Miller, 45 Yards 1. Rice, 1636 2. Henry Ellard, 1183 3. Rison, 1158 Touchdowns 1. Rice, 18 2. Miller, 13 3. James Lofton, 12 RUSHING LEADERS Yards 1. Thurman Thomas, 1276 2. Neal Anderson, 1247 3. Bo Jackson, 1161 Touchdowns 1. Tom Rathman, 15 2. Anderson, 13 3t. Many tied with 12 DEFENSIVE LEADERS Interceptions 1. Kevin Ross, 10 2t. Many tied with 8 Sacks 1. Lawrence Taylor, 20 2. Derrick Thomas, 17 3. Reggie White, 16 SPECIAL TEAMS LEADERS Field Goals: Jeff Jaeger, 16 Punting Avg: Rohn Stark, 50.8 Punt Return Avg: Ellard, 12.9 Kick Return Avg: Tim Brown, 20.6

August 19, 2007

Steve J. Rogers' Blog

First step into going back to freelance journalism

Well I am taking a bold step back into the freelancing journalism world with a query letter sent out to a business market. The article is on an interesting startup investment venture by the outgoing head of the hedge fund arm for the investment firm that I work for. What he is doing, is going to be setting up a hedge fund, where 100% of the profits generated by the fund will be funneled into a charitable foundation, which would then use the fund to help various causes. They have a website, well a blog actually, hopefully I will link it here, but I'm not comfortable with linking to the blog or official corporate website until they are up and running. In any event, hopefully this publication will see this audacious venture as something that should appear in their publication! Well the article is actually written, which is considered a “no-no” in the world of freelance journalism, but it was for a course that I am taking. It has been quite a while since I’ve done something like this, probably not since 2001. Lets hope this works.

Steve J. Rogers

August 19, 2007

Steve J. Rogers' Blog

Quick hits

-Chicago post will be up soon; just getting all the pictures organized, resized and uploaded is taking a while. -Not much to add right now. Going to a Beach Party put on by a NYC radio show on Friday in New Jersey, WFAN’s Mike & The Mad Dog at Bar-A in Bellmar. Also heading to a Saturday afternoon minor league game in Bridgeport, CT for a bachelor party.

Steve J. Rogers

August 19, 2007

TakerHart's Blog

Retro Blog: Wrestlemania 21 Report

I just got home from Wrestlemania 21. We were out by the Team LA store and JBL came out. He taunted us and we booed him. I guess the 30 man battle royal was on Heat. Did the commentators say what Booker T would get because he won? There were Booker and Regal chants. I think Heidenrich was over. I liked Eddie/Rey. Eddie was over huge (maybe cause he lies, cheats, and steals,) There was a small 619 chant too. Money in the Bank- The crowd booed when the staff members were extinguishing the ladders on the stage. That was a good match. It reminded me of all those TLC matches with out the tables. Eugene came out and then Hassan beat him up. When Hogan came out, I nearly lost my voice and probably the most the crowd did the same. This is a close as I have to come to seeing Hogan wrestle live. The crowd cheered for him for 5 minutes then he left. Orton vs Undertaker. Undertaker did some cool levatation (riding a platform to the ring,) Match was good. I could not take a picture of the Tombstone Piledriver because a fan 2 rows down decided to raise his arms and celebrate. Angle vs. HBK. The crowd was 50/50 for each man. The crowd chanted "Let's go Angle" and then "Let's go HBK". There was also a "You screwed Bret!" chant. That was probably the match of the night. I did not expect HBK to lose cleanly in the ring by tapping out. The women's title match. People around me started getting up and leaving to go the bathroom. The match could have been better but Trish retained. Piper's Pit. When ever Piper would say something about the What! chants, the crowd would chant What! louder. I did not expect Carlito coming but I expected him to be Stunnered (if that is a word). Sumo match Read women's match except it was shorter, Big Show's aattire was horrible, and is he cursed. He has not won a single Wrestlemania match in his career. People booed the wrestlers when they went into their corners to get more salt. JBL vs, Cena. More people paid attention to the fake money and gold stuff falling from the rafters than JBL kissing his belt good bye. Match was short and showed how limited each of their movesets were. JBL was kind of treated like a jobber. I think there a lot of stalling in the match. The HOF segment was next while they were setting for Motorhead. Hogan was over. *Tune in to Raw to find out if he coming back* Motorhead has a lot gear. I figured there would be more brawling in the main event. If they hate each other, should they beat the pulp out of each other. This match was ok. Batista celebrated for about five minutes then left. The highlights package was shown and Howard Finkel that us for coming. (Why does the WWE have 3 ring announcers?) I bought a Wrestlemania t-shirt and program and then went home. Overall, I really liked this show. (I paid $400 for two tickets, I better have liked it.) I want the DVD for WM21. The crowd the was hot and most of matches were good. I don't know how it falls under the Greatest Wrestlemania of Alll Time but it might in the top ten. But what do I know? I am just a mark.

Prophet of Mike Zagurski

August 19, 2007

8/18: Wanting This Meeting To Fly By

11:15 p.m. • As a follow-up to yesterday's entry about the pseudo-kkk. Here's a PM exchange from a mod from late last night. I'm sure you can figure out who is who: They say the best comedy has a hint of truth to it. 6:15 p.m. • Actually, this isn't too bad an idea. At least it'll be easy to spell. For some reason, whenever I type out the name "Chris" I add a "t" at the end. If I was a Chinese resident and had two kids, I'd name them "Ping" and "Pong." And when they misbehave, I would spank them with a paddle. 12:45 p.m. • Wow, a few blog entries have been looking back over the past year or so. I might as well do the same – for the past three hours. I’m at lunch during my hippie meeting. Of course, one dipshit makes some lame-ass attempt to make it appear that I don’t do my job and I completely blow him out of the fucking water. Basically, I was accused of not doing something. The problem is I need to first be told by someone higher up on the food chain to do it. Several people that I’m cool with shook my hand during the mid-morning break for putting this asshole back in his place. Not sure if I’ll have a Monday morning meeting about it though. Regarding Smues and his hatred of airlines. The last time I was a passenger on an airplane was 10 years go this summer. I hate flying. I’m not “afraid” but I think part of my distaste comes from not being able to think you’re in control. For example, if you’re driving and a big rig comes at you, there’s some chance you could escape. When your jet is nose-diving several thousand feet toward the earth, there’s really nothing much you can do about it. Anyway, back to my story. I was going to California to visit my half-brother and I had an aisle seat with this mom and four brats: One kid was next to her on a window seat and the other three were in the row behind us. Of course they were out of control and I had to get up a bunch of times for her to take her kids to the bathroom. Whatever. However, on this Shittsburgh-to-LA flight, we passed over the Grand Canyon. As I tried to sneak a peek at this hole in the ground, the mom and kid had their heads up to the window with nowhere for me to look. After the plane passed, the mom looked at me and suddenly acted all shocked that they didn’t give me a chance to view the sight. “Billie, sit back so the man can see.” Nice try but way too late seeing how the canyon was out of view. Oh well, the next time she turned around to control her kids behind us I just took up all of the arm rest (we had been sharing the whole flight) and when she turned back around to sit down she had to lean toward her kid for the duration of the tip. Oh, yeah. There were these Indians in front of us (dot-heads, not tomahawks) who were a pain in the ass the whole time to the stewardesses and gay male attendants. The highlight came when they ordered a veggie meal but didn’t actually order it pre-flight, which is what you were supposed to do. That must have sucked for the flight attendants when they went to the passengers who actually ordered these special meals and realized their mistake. Lunchtime is almost over. Back to sitting and going over my MVP baseball rosters for another few hours.

August 18, 2007

TakerHart's Blog

Been a year (Personal)

Maybe I should stop playing sports. My University is closing down the tennis courts. I learned how to play tennis there. I had to wake up 6 o' clock in the morning to set up for a tournament. About a year ago, the Upland Roller Hockey Center shut down. It was put out of its misery. The people working there were irresponsible. They never collected any money from any of the players. The air conditioning stopped working in the middle of summer. The lockers and restrooms were horrible. I was on vacation. It was a peaceful vacation compared 2005's trip to Pennsylvania where grandma went under open heart surgery. She is doing really well. When I was on Myspace I was alerted to the fact that the goalie on our team died. Well, that was a really big shock. Obviously, I was really sad and confused. I wasn't really as close to him as one of my teammates was. I didn't go to the funeral because I was away. I still wonder if I would have went if I would still be on the team. Upland Roller Hockey closed a week later. I was depressed. My team was talking to me. They were retooling and going to play in West Covina. It sucks being rejected and not being told you're fired or being told you suck. I need an explanation but I'll never ask because I don't want to talk to them ever again. My current team seems to like me. I show up to every game and occasionally I score. There is another part of this story but it wll be told later.

Prophet of Mike Zagurski

August 18, 2007

8/17: Alarmed At Wild Hogs

10 p.m. • Regarding SFA Jack’s workday: One time the fire alarm went off at my place of employment and everybody in the building was like, "uh what do we do?” How about LEAVE THE FUCKING BUIDLING? Was this alarm a short circuit or something like that? Probably. But it’s a FIRE ALARM. I grabbed my keys and wallet and headed out. I don’t care if there wasn’t a fire. I didn’t want to be one of those people caught in a raging inferno and have it announced later that despite the fire alarm going off I stayed in the building. Christ, I’m not that stupid. • You know the funniest thing about this -- I actually paused for several seconds and thought, “Did I really type that earlier today? I don't even remember logging in to TSM today.” • So the better half and I went to our one friend’s house tonight (the one with the one baby daddy in jail for armed robbery, for those keeping score at home). Not only did her and the baby daddy of kid #2 overpay for this house, but they got an adjustable and the so-called man of the house has a problem with credit-card debt. From what I heard, he maxes out his cards on frivolous shit. Ugh. Seriously, you’re not a kid anymore. You’ve got a mortgage, a pseudo-wife and two kids – one of which isn’t yours. You chose this life. Now deal with it. And by “deal with it,” I don’t mean “go out and buy stupid shit.” • Christ, I have to go to a stupid board meeting where I sit there all day an collect a per diem that’s half of what I make in a normal workday. With me coming in on Sunday to finish up some work, I would be coming in for a full week, Sunday-Saturday. I thought about this for a second and realized what a lazy shit I’ve become. Back in the day I went to school and worked full-time, I worked two jobs/seven days/60+ hours per week. Now I’m bitching about this? Well, yeah. • When I was taking out the trash at around 10:30 p.m. last night, I noticed several kids on my street playing football with a glow-in-the-dark pigskin. I then got one of those flashbacks to when I was in high school and did stuff like that. I was bummed for a second until I realized how much I like my present years more than my teen years, believe it or not. Yeah, I was a real bitter, cynical sonofabitch back then. • Speaking of sorta mid-life crises, the better half got “Wild Hogs” from the mother-in-law to watch tonight. Jesus Christ. I knew this was going to be bad, and I was right. Sadly, Mrs. kkk found it hilarious. Oh well, at least Ray Liotta was a surprise. I had no idea he was that desperate for money.

August 18, 2007

2007 MVP Watch #5

It's been over a month since my last MVP Watch and to my surprise not much has changed, although I do have a new #1 in each league. Chase Utley hasn't played since breaking his hand on July 26th so he lost the #1 spot by default but he's still hanging on in the Top 5 for the moment. David Wright has been red hot since the break and has made the biggest jump. To no surprise at Albert Pujols is making a serious MVP run yet again. What is amazing about the current N.L. MVP race is that the two best players in the N.L. right now play for a team that is nine games under .500, that being of Hanley Ramirez and Miguel Cabrera of the Marlins. Neither has any shot at winning the real award but they are a cut above the competition at the moment. And finally...Eric Byrnes still leads in the N.L. in Win Shares! I continue to be baffled by this unless he really has become a great defensive outfielder rather than the "one great diving play, misplay the next five" outfielder he was with the A's but I find this hard to believe. Win Shares is the only reason I'm bothering to keep him in the Top 10. 10. Eric Byrnes, Diamondbacks .301/.367/.494, 82 RC, 117 OPS+, .289 EQA, 35.6 VORP, 24.7 Win Shares 9. Barry Bonds, Giants .280/.495/.589, 79 RC, 183 OPS+, .367 EQA, 51.3 VORP, 18.2 Win Shares 8. Matt Holliday, Rockies .338/.399/.581, 88 RC, 146 OPS+, .314 EQA, 50.9 VORP, 19.9 Win Shares 7. Prince Fielder, Brewers .284/.380/.609, 89 RC, 154 OPS+, .319 EQA, 49.7 VORP, 20.9 Win Shares 6. Jose Reyes, Mets .304/.377/.453, 92 RC, 121 OPS+, .295 EQA, 48.2 VOPR, 22.6 Win Shares 5. Chase Utley, Phillies .336/.414/.581, 84 RC, 154 OPS+, .327 EQA, 55.0 VORP, 21.0 Win Shares 4. Albert Pujols, Cardinals .317/.419/.550, 89 RC, 154 OPS+, .327 EQA, 49.9 VORP, 24.0 Win Shares 3. David Wright, Mets .310/.398/.521, 95 RC, 144 OPS+, .319 EQA, 51.6 VORP, 23.6 Win Shares 2. Hanley Ramirez, Marlins .343/.395/.578, 102 RC, 157 OPS+, .325 EQA, 71.1 VORP, 22.9 Win Shares 1. Miguel Cabrera, Marlins .334/.414/.616, 106 RC, 171 OPS+, .340 EQA, 65.5 VORP, 24.4 Win Shares In the A.L. it has gone to sort of being a four player race to a definitive two player race. Magglio Ordonez still hasn't fallen off a cliff which makes me think we're close to someone starting a steroid rumor about him. Speaking of steroid rumors, A-Rod grabs the top spot this time around but it is pretty much a toss up at this point. Ichiro Suzuki and Vladimir Guerrero hung tough through the first half and are still solidily in Top 5 but they have fallen off the Maggs/A-Rod pace. The rest of the Top 10 is a mess and you could jumble it several different ways without getting an argument out of me. 10. David Ortiz, Red Sox .311/.424/.543, 86 RC, 152 OPS+, .315 EQA, 49.6 VORP, 17.2 Win Shares 9. Jorge Posada, Yankees .334/.416/.531, 75 RC, 154 OPS+, .316 EQA, 52.6 VORP, 17.4 Win Shares 8. Curtis Granderson, Tigers .293/.351/.543, 84 RC, 134 OPS+, .295 EQA, 43.5 VORP, 19.7 Win Shares 7. Grady Sizemore, Indians .278/.382/.465, 93 RC, 126 OPS+, .291 EQA, 39.1 VORP, 22.9 Win Shares 6. Brian Roberts, Orioles .313/.397/.461, 89 RC, 128 OPS+, .302 EQA, 48.6 VORP, 20.7 Win Shares 5. Victor Martinez, Indians .301/.374/.505, 81 RC, 133 OPS+, .295 EQA, 42.2 VORP, 22.9 Win Shares 4. Vladimir Guerrero, Angels .319/.404/.531, 95 RC, 151 OPS+, .311 EQA, 46.0 VORP, 24.3 Win Shares 3. Ichiro Suzuki, Mariners .347/.396/.431, 99 RC, 125 OPS+, .299 EQA, 49.6 VORP, 25.8 Win Shares 2. Magglio Ordonez, Tigers .356/.430/.595, 114 RC, 169 OPS+, .337 EQA, 65.3 VORP, 26.8 Win Shares 1. Alex Rodriguez, Yankees .305/.412/.630, 117 RC, 177 OPS+, .334 EQA, 68.0 VORP, 26.1 Win Shares

August 18, 2007

Notes From Cubicle 211-A

Lightning Crashes and the Hurricane Dean watch is on

So, uh, yesterday the rain from tropical depression Erin hit much of south and central Texas with lots of rain, including us good folks here in Houston. Dozens of surface roads, underpasses, and even one of the freeways (Hwy 288) were closed due to high water all around. A couple hundred idiots who should know by now not to drive through the water when you can't see the road beneath were forced to abandon their cars. Poor people all around town ended up at the shelters and ended up on the news crying for help because they got a little bit of water in their yards. One homeless lady stuck under a bridge did have to be rescued though. That's not good. But forget all that flooding and shit. The highlight of the day for me, easily, was around 11:30 yesterday morning. That's when we heard a somewhat loud boom outside the building here and then...THE LIGHTS WENT OUT. All around the office, printers stopped spitting out paper, desk radios that had been turned up to unreasonable volumes were silent, and computer screens went blank, depriving dozens of workers of the porn they were looking at. A lightning strike had hit a transformer in the area and blown the power to the whole area. It was pandemonium. Or not. Actually, other than a few "Oh my Gods!" from a few of the more exciteable folks around here, it was pretty calm. Most of the people here spent the next 2 hours gathered out by the elevators, bonding over awkward conversation and a round of singing by a few of our more shameless co-workers under the soft glow of emergency lighting. Me? I stretched out in the two chairs in my cube and took a nap. Why go out there and hang with them when I can catch a few winks? After a couple of hours of having us just sit around in the dark with nothing to do, management sent us home for the day since they were told we'd have no power for "several more hours" by the light company. I'm sure the lost productivity killed them, but what choice did they have? So I braved the rain and made it home in time to squeeze in a couple games of Madden 08 before the wife arrived home and killed the fun. Oh well. It was a good day while it lasted. The bad news is that the real fun has just begun. Hurricane Dean is projected to enter the Gulf of Mexico early next week and make landfall anywhere from the Yucatan Peninsula to Houston. Of course, despite there being several hundred miles between those two points, the news crews have already started "gather up all your valuable shit, go into the closet nearest the center of your house, and duck and cover your head because Dean is going to be our armageddon" mode. Sigh. We'll see what actually happens. I'm not worried; George Bush has his ranch here so he wouldn't let us get destroyed, would he?

sfaJack

August 17, 2007

TakerHart's Blog

Utah Mine Rant

As of the writing of this blog, there are still 6 miners trapped in mine for the last ten days. Just recently ambulances were called to the scene because several rescuers were injured. What upsets me is that it has taken so long to find these guys. It's the twenty first century and the people in charge have been slowly digging to find these miners. Through out this entire crisis the CEO of the mining company has been doing damage control. He has been trying to shift the blame on an earthquake. I believe it has not determined which came first; the earthquake or the mine collapse. I know one thing. The people of Pittston, Scranton, and Dupont, PA. would have put up with this. In the days before World War II, the Irish miners in PA were getting sick of working in the mines. They were moving on to other ventures. The owners of these mines looked to the Polish to work in the mines. A Pole representing the mining company would travel to Poland and tell the Polish how great America is. The Poles would agree that America is great and would leave for America. When they got to America, they worked in the mines. Those were my relatives. In their time working in the mines, they experienced lung problems. During their time in the mines, they never collapsed. I believe if something were to happen to them, the surrounding communities would have come together and rescue them. They would have put up with waiting more than 10 days. I hope the miners are safe.

Prophet of Mike Zagurski

August 17, 2007

TSB Sim Season: Week 13

The Vikings continue their surprise run to the top of the NFL standings and wrap up the NFC Central division title by eviscerating the Lions 42-14. The NFC playoff picture is pretty clear with the Vikings, Giants, and 49ers leading the divisions and the Eagles and Redskins as wild cards with the only final playoff spot up for grabs between the Rams, Saints, Bears, and Cowboys. Over in the AFC it is a little more muddy. The Raiders still have a nice cushion in the AFC West even after being stunned by the Bengals this week who were without Boomer Esiason. Bills sort of avenged their shocking defeat at the hands of the Patriots in Week 10 by eeking out a three point win. In the AFC Central the Oilers looked to be close to running away with the division a couple of weeks ago but divisional losses later and they find themselves tied with the Steelers at 7-5. The Dolphins are a near lock for a wild card while the Chiefs, Chargers, and Browns are fighting for the final two spots along with the whoever doesn't win the AFC Central. Week 13 Scores New Orleans 23, Atlanta 9 NO: 6-6, ATL: 2-10 -Falcons: 12 yards rushing Pittsburgh 28, Houston 20 PIT: 7-5, HOU: 7-5 -Louis Lipps: 6 rec, 111 yards N.Y. Giants 30, Tampa Bay 27 OT NYG: 10-2, TB: 4-8 -Ottis Anderson: 108 yards rushing San Diego 31, N.Y. Jets 0 SD: 7-5, JET: 3-9 -Marion Butts: 178 yards rushing Cincinnati 14, L.A. Raiders 9 CIN: 5-7, RAI: 9-3 -James Brooks: 106 yards rushing Philadelphia 28, Phoenix 10 PHI: 8-4, PHX: 2-11 -Randall Cunnigham: 246 yards passing Denver 38, Seattle 28 DEN: 5-7, SEA: 5-7 -Mark Jackson: 5 rec, 136 yards Green Bay 28, Indianapolis 27 GB: 4-8, IND: 4-8 -Ed West: 5 rec, 120 yards Washington 23, Cowboys 7 WAS: 8-4, DAL: 5-7 -Ernest Byner: 111 yards rushing Buffalo 27, New England 24 BUF: 10-2, NE: 3-9 -Thurman Thomas: 199 yards rushing Miami 20, Chicago 14 MIA: 9-3, CHI: 5-7 -Sammie Smith: 77 yards rushing Minnesota 42, Detroit 14 MIN: 11-2, DET: 2-10 -Wade Wilson: 183 yards passing Kansas City 30, Cleveland 10 KC: 7-5, CLE: 6-6 -Barry Word: 137 total yards San Francisco 35, L.A. Rams 34 SF: 9-3, RAM: 6-6 -Jerry Rice: 6 rec, 169 yards Leaders thru Week 13 PASSING LEADERS Rating 1. Phil Simms, 201.8 2. Dan Marino, 177.8 3. Randall Cunningham, 174.9 Yards 1. Warren Moon, 3018 2. Joe Montana, 2910 3. Jim Everett, 2783 Touchdowns 1. Montana, 31 2t. Marino, 29 2t. Everett, 29 RECEIVING LEADERS Receptions 1. Jerry Rice, 59 2. Andre Rison, 41 3. Anthony Miller, 40 Yards 1. Rice, 1524 2. Sterling Sharpe, 1044 3. Rison, 1022 Touchdowns 1. Rice, 17 2. Miller, 12 3. James Lofton, 11 RUSHING LEADERS Yards 1. Thurman Thomas, 1143 2. Neal Anderson, 1101 3. Christian Okoye, 1029 Touchdowns 1. Tom Rathman, 14 2t. Many tied with 12 DEFENSIVE LEADERS Interceptions 1. Kevin Ross, 9 2t. Many tied with 8 Sacks 1. Lawrence Taylor, 18 2t. Bruce Smith, 15 2t. Derrick Thomas, 15 SPECIAL TEAMS LEADERS Field Goals: Jeff Jaeger, 16 Punting Avg: Rohn Stark, 51.3 Punt Return Avg: Henry Ellard, 12.2 Kick Return Avg: David Meggett, 20.6

August 17, 2007

8/16: #13, C D'ese Games

kkk's Top 103 Posters Number 13: NoCal Mike You know, one might think I hate liberals. And while that may be true, there’s one group out there I hate even more. Those faggot “independents” that are bigger commies than Khrushchev. Fuck I hate these people. If you’re going to be for anti-American shit then just come out and say it. Don’t pretend you’re all high and mighty. Calling yourself an “independent” doesn’t make you any smarter than reactionary fucks like me. Medium-Large Media may spooge all over you come election time, and they might invite to their “focus group rooms” during a debate just so we can see how MODERATES react to the candidates' responses. Give me a break. This is why I love people like NoCal Mike. If you’re going to hate this country, at least be honest about it. NoCal is, and that’s why he rules. Shit, he’s one of the few left-wingers that I believe would vote for Ralph Nader. And while I’m not a huge fan of the "mindless zombies taking over the world” movies, NoCal loves ‘em. Say, maybe he is a Democrat after all. And he watched “OZ,” which might explain some of his opinions on gay marriage. (I hope the future Mrs. NoCalMichelle knows about this.) Wait a second, that "OZ" thread was in response to a thread I started. Uh, nevermind. Go queers! 8 p.m. • Still haven't really gotten used to MP3 and all that other shit. Damn kids. 7:45 p.m. • So when I got my super-sized cable package a few weeks ago, one of the channels I’m surprised I haven’t checked out more is the NFL Network. Today I had some preseason game on from several days ago and couldn’t decide if this was a good or bad thing. I’ve never been big into preseason, but I never had my livelihood depend on these “meaningless” games. Charles Barkley once said that preseason is just to screw over the fans, but I don’t have a problem with them. Sure there’s always those handful of starters that get hurt for the year, but this is how many teams gauge second-string talent. Talent that take over for injured or under-performing starters in the regular season. It’s weird watching preseason games because while you watch a missed tackle on a third and 10 play and shrug your shoulders, the defender at fault is probably thinking other things, especially if he’s not the opening-day starter. • Oh for fuck’s sake, W. can’t get his pro-invasion legislation so now we shouldn’t go after the invaders for the sake of Census figures? Boo-fucking hoo. When it comes to illegals, there’s only one number that should be considered for the Census: too many.

August 16, 2007

The Chosen Blog

Carnival Preseason Top 25 8/16

(#) = last year's finish 1. West Virginia (11) 2. Florida (1) 3. LSU (3) 4. USC (6) 5. Michigan (9) 6. Louisville (5) 7. Texas (16) 8. Wisconsin (8) 9. Ohio State (2) 10. Arkansas (14) 11. California (13) 12. Virginia Tech (21) 13. Auburn (7) 14. Tennessee (19) 15. Hawaii (25) 16. Rutgers (12) 17. Oklahoma (10) 18. Boston College (NR) 19. Georgia (20) 20. Nebraska (NR) 21. Missouri (NR) 22. Boise State (4) 23. South Carolina (NR) 24. Wake Forest (18) 25. TCU (22) others - BYU(15), Penn State(NR), Georgia Tech(NR), Texas A&M(NR), UCLA(NR) Conference Champions ACC Atlantic - Boston College ACC Coastal - Virginia Tech Big East - West Virginia Big Ten - Michigan Big 12 North - Nebraska Big 12 South - Texas C-USA East - Southern Miss C-USA West - Houston MAC East - Ohio MAC West - Western Michigan MWAC - TCU PAC 10 - USC SEC East - Florida SEC West - LSU Sun Belt - Arkansas St. WAC - Hawaii

Carnival

August 16, 2007

Notes From Cubicle 211-A

We're all gonna die

Tropical Storm depresssion Erin is bearing down on the south Texas coast. According to our local TV weatherpersons (OMG political correctness~!), those of us in the Houston metro area (200+ miles north of the storm's landfall) should brace for the imminent death and destruction this storm will surely bring. Oh, wait. What's that? It's actually just going to rain a lot over the next couple of days? Get the fuck out of here with all that stupid KATRINA WAS A VERY REAL TRAGEDY THAT COULD HAPPEN TO US TOO bullshit. In other tropics news, Hurricane Dean continues to head for the Yucatan Peninsula. Barring a change of course, landfall is expected there sometime early next week. Good to know that George Bush hates Mexicans, too. ----------------------- For the second time in three months, a Saudi guy had his snakes confiscated at the Cairo airport. I've flown out of the Cairo airport. Maybe it was because it was about 3 in the morning when we were boarding my particular flight or maybe it was because the flight was headed to Amsterdam (instead of the U.S.) and security didn't think the terrorists would be interested in jihading a plane that wasn't likely have a lot of Americans on board, but security was not too concerned with checking anything or anybody too closely. Every time the metal detector went off, they'd wave you through. No carry-ons were opened, no liquids were banned from the flight--yet they've confiscated two bags full of snakes in three months. Weird. ----------------------- This guy's stunt got a chuckle out of me but I doubt he'd find it funny if his tenants decided to pay him in change to protest his high rental rates. ----------------------- Wait--scam artists use the Internet to carry out their schemes?? I'm SHOCKED. This world has gotten pretty bad when you can't even safely travel to an African nation and meet with a total stranger who said she loves you and has promised to pay you $85,000 in gold if you come rescue her from her hellhole of a homeland anymore.

sfaJack

August 16, 2007

TSB Sim Season: Week 12

This seems to be turning into a weekly Bills update but something interesting happens to them every week. This week in their showdown with the Dolphins for first place in the AFC East, Jim Kelly was knocked out of the game in first half. Lucky for them they have one of the few decent back up quarterbacks on the game in Frank Reich and he led two 4th quarter touchdown drives for the 24-21 win. Bills sweep the season series giving them essentially a two game lead on the Dolphins now. In other quarterback injury news, the Bengals lost to the Eagles and lost Boomer Esiason to injury dimming their already very slim playoff hopes. The Browns season seemed to be spiraling out of control after three straight losses including two huge blow outs but this week they knocked off the divison leading Oilers to pull back within in a game of first palce. Last week the Bears appeared to be on the verge of turning their season around after their win against the Vikings but they shit the bed against the Colts this week and now the Vikings can clinch the division next week. Week 12 Scores San Francisco 21, Phoenix 10 SF: 8-3, PHX: 2-10 -Tom Rathman: 100 yards rushing San Diego 24, New Orleans 20 SD: 6-5, NO: 5-6 -Billy Joe Tolliver: 179 yards passing Indianapolis 28, Chicago 17 IND: 4-7, CHI: 5-6 -Albert Bentley: 77 yards rushing Philadelphia 35, Cincinnati 21 PHI: 7-4, CIN: 4-7 -Boomer Esiason: leaves injured Cleveland 24, Houston 21 CLE: 6-5, HOU: 7-4 -Bernie Kosar: 264 yards passing Tampa Bay 24, Atlanta 9 TB: 4-7, ATL: 2-9 -Chris Miller: 31% comp pct, 3 int Kansas City 30, Denver 6 KC: 6-5, DEN: 4-7 -Christian Okoye: 106 yards rushing Buffalo 24, Miami 21 BUF: 9-2, MIA: 8-3 -Jim Kelly: leaves injured L.A. Raiders 17, Seattle 14 RAI: 9-2, SEA: 5-6 -Bo Jackson: 85 yards rushing Pittsburgh 17, Washington 7 PIT: 6-5, WAS: 7-4 -Bubby Brister: 202 yards passing N.Y. Giants 33, Dallas 28 GIA: 9-2, DAL: 5-6 -David Meggett: 112 yards rushing L.A. Rams 31, Detroit 21 RAM: 6-5, DET: 2-9 -Jim Everett: 259 yards passing Minnesota 37, Green Bay 14 MIN: 10-2, GB: 3-8 -Steve Jordan: 4 rec, 105 yards N.Y. Jets 34, New England 14 JET: 3-8, NE: 3-8 -Al Toon: 5 rec, 137 yards Leaders thru Week 12 PASSING LEADERS Rating 1. Phil Simms, 201.0 2. Dan Marino, 175.2 3. Randall Cunningham, 167.5 Yards 1. Warren Moon, 2770 2. Montana, 2684 3. Jim Everett, 2536 Touchdowns 1t. Marino, 27 1t. Montana, 27 3. Moon, 26 RECEIVING LEADERS Receptions 1. Jerry Rice, 53 2t. Many tied with 36 Yards 1. Rice, 1355 2. Sterling Sharpe, 989 3. Eric Martin, 970 Touchdowns 1. Rice, 14 2t. Many tied with 10 RUSHING LEADERS Yards 1. Neal Anderson, 1056 2. Christian Okoye, 962 3. Johnny Johnson, 945 Touchdowns 1. Tom Rathman, 13 2. Johnson, 12 3. Many tied with 11 DEFENSIVE LEADERS Interceptions 1. Joey Browner, 8 2t. Many tied with 7 Sacks 1. Lawrence Taylor, 17 2. Bruce Smith, 15 3t. Many tied with 14 SPECIAL TEAMS LEADERS Field Goals: Jeff Jaeger, 13 Punting Avg: Rohn Stark, 51.3 Punt Return Avg: Jeff Query, 12.8 Kick Return Avg: David Meggett, 20.5